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Catheter Journal- 5th Month

Sunday, May 30th- Month 6- My cath training is still coming along. I had hoped to avoid the problems I've had but I'm not surprised they did happen. I'm still drinking lots of cranberry juice and haven't had the slightest inclining of an infection so overall I have to say all is well.

Sunday, June 6th- This last week has been strange to say the least. The larger cath had been sucking in air after each time I peed, so the next time I peed it had air in with it. The spurting sensation gave me a bit of discomfort that momentarily passed though. Also, since changing back to a 16fr I have been peeing past my cath a lot more now too.

Sunday, June 13th & 20th- It's been more of the same. My cath's aren't sucking air like the larger one was, but I've noticed when I pee past my cath it is usually when I become suddenly active (like getting up after I've been sitting down for some time). It seems like my kidneys dump a lot of pee all at once and my bladder won't hold that much any more but my cath can't drain that fast either. The cath changes them selves have become quite routine and no longer hurt or give too much discomfort. Taking care of arousals has become quite easy with minimal or no discomfort as well, but I'm pretty much stuck to rubbing petroleum jelly inside my wet diapers since I really can't go too long without having a diaper on. That's ok though since I've always like doing it that way any how. ;)

Sunday, June 27th- My cath started hurting a little and I was all to glad to change it out this evening. I had a little discomfort after changing it out but that went away as usual.

Thursday, July 1st- My cath has been hurting all day today. Every time I pee I get the sense that I need to keep peeing really bad, which hurts of course. This feeling is also accompanied by my spurting small amounts of air after I'm done peeing once again. I pulled out the cath after I got home from work and gave myself about four hours off to recuperate. I've noticed that several times I needed to pee and did so freely but was clearly aware I need to go- and then was going. I made sure to also try and consciously go at the same time though, but I must say I'm quite pleased since twice I was sitting down and once I was walking. It seems I may very well be un-potty trained, but only a few days without caths will actually tell me whether on not I actually am. In the mean time I have two caths left and will use them both before trying my quick un-potty training without the training wheels any more.

Saturday, July 3rd Month 7- My cath has kept on feeling quite uncomfortable, and at times even hurt. I changed it out a bit early today just in case I was developing some sort of infection. Upon closer inspection I saw the tip of my skin is completely red and irritated. I'm wondering if I've just developed an irritation from using caths for too long. This is my last cath so one way or the other I will have relief from the caths before too long.

Sunday, July 4th- I stayed up late to watch the fireworks then let a bunch more off myself. This should be illegal- oh wait some of it was. Tomorrow I'm going to the beach but have all ready decided the sea is not a good place for me to be with a cath in, still I could use the sun.

Friday, July 9th- My cath has been continuing to hurt and I'm very raw red now. I removed the cath early in this morning since I don't thing it's a good idea to continue this much more. Infection or just simple irritation, it's getting progressively worse so this is it. The last cath is gone, am I fully incontinent? Am I diaper dependent? Only time will tell, and I've decided to continue this journal for a bit longer so you can know too.

Saturday, July 10th- Well the good news is the irritation has all ready gone down so it definitely wasn't an infection. The bad news is that I woke up last night to pee. I remember not having to move at all and was able to easily let it happen, but it sill sucks I woke up and lost sleep just to let something happen that would have any way. During the day I peed numerous times, each time was easy with no hint of trying to hold it in or automatically claming when I start- a very good sign.

Sunday, July 11th- Pretty much the same thing. I woke up last night in time to let myself pee quite easily. It's also easy to automatically pee during the day too. I'm glad to be well diapered and enjoying it. Although, while writing this I found myself trying to automatically clamp off from peeing. I need to try and remember to consciously let it happen when ever I get the feeling that I am all ready peeing or I'll risk become (gulp) potty trained again. It seems there is still a bit of reverse potty training I still need to do. Compared to the 12 month program I'd say I'm somewhere along month 4 or possibly 5- and it only took me 7 months to get here. As a side note, It's amazing how many of the "how to begin" notes I am all ready following without really trying it. Overall, I'd say it seems the program is a better way to start off for most unless like me you are starting out with a disability.

Saturday, August 14th- Well it's been a month now. It is quite easy for me to pee when ever/where ever I need to, and have sometimes found my self wetter that I figured and leaking with a large Abena X-plus. Unfortunately my original potty training is more deeply rooted than I like too. I often find myself automatically clamping as I start to pee even before I realize I need to (about one in three time). Even with this automatic clamping though I am now able to begin peeing almost immediately any way, and seem to be slowly overcoming it. As a side note I have also managed to wet the floor once when I had just gotten out of my hot tub and did not yet have a diaper on (luckily tile). I am still waking up very early in the morning to pee, and almost always get back to sleep, sometimes twice in one night. Overall, my reverse potty training is coming along slowly but I can see more real progress made within the past 9 month than I've had in the past 15 years. I know I'm more than half way there and will keep at it until I'm fully incontinent, diaper dependent, and finally happy. But, since this is meant as a cath journal I'm ending it here. Thanks for reading, stay diapered.

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