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New School
By Les Lea
After my
parent’s divorce mom decided she wanted to start a new
life with me in another part of the country. She knew we
needed to make a complete break and was eager that I
should reap the benefits of a whole new experience.
Educationally
I’d been doing OK but she knew I wasn’t all that happy
and, as an eleven year-old, was about to move up to
Middle School. However, that move was going to be to a
new academy mom discovered as she searched for a new
job.
She’s a research
chemist and I’m glad to say, quite in demand. So we
travelled half way across the country because she’d
found employment in a laboratory, out in the wilds of
nowhere, that dealt with medical /gene/stem-cell
research, an area that mom was expert in. The centre was
settled out of town on the edge of a desert but the town
itself was large enough that you didn’t feel completely
cut off from civilization… also it had a rather unique
‘school’.
‘Vestra frui
pueritia’ was the school’s motto, which I gather roughly
translates as ‘Enjoy your childhood’
Mom is clever
and intuitive and said she only wanted the best for me,
so, although it may be a wrench away from the few
friends I had, this new beginning would give us both the
kick-start to new opportunities from which she thought
we’d both benefit. The school, the ‘ALEXIARES and
ANICETUS ACADEMY’ was to be my new seat of learning. It
wasn’t quite what I expected.
*
Hi, I’m David,
David Grohm, and ever since I was young I’ve always
liked to experiment in the way I dressed. My long
tousled dirty blond hair and big green eyes (mom always
said I had the deepest green eyes she’d ever seen)
giving me a sort of neutral sexual look – I could (and
was) mistaken for either gender. Sometimes my ‘dressing
up’ got away with little or no comment, other times it
created quite a stir.
“If everyone
else is dressed the same then the world would be a
boring place.”
This was mom’s
general rule about what I wore if I ever felt guilty
over some of the outfits I chose. She was always very
supportive of my originality and, even if she didn’t
totally approve, certainly didn’t try to stop me from
developing and investigating those interests.
Mom, Heather
Grohm, is a very clever woman, far cleverer than my dad,
James, who often found it difficult to keep up with his
brilliant wife. These days mom probably wouldn’t win any
awards for the sexiest mom on the school run, she wasn’t
that type of woman, but she was always the most diligent
and caring and made me, her only son, feel very special.
She wasn’t cloying or over-bearing (perhaps that was
me?) she knew what was best or just when I needed some
space. She said that she saw a sweet, creative and
wonderful person from the moment she set eyes on the
‘cutest baby in the world’. I loved it when mom spoke
about me like that.
Ever since I was
quite young I’d worn my mom’s clothes, I’d worn my dad’s
clothes, I’d often make my own stuff up from pieces of
fabric, plastic and stick it all together with a few
pins then wander around in my latest creation. A little
girl doing this would have passed unnoticed but a little
boy; well it raised a few eyebrows with our neighbours -
especially if I was dressed either like some foreign
dignitary (and acting like one) or, more likely, a local
peasant in rags and little else.
However, as I
got older my main desire was to wear diapers. There was
something very special about growing up and able to
appreciate the comfort and pleasure such a piece of
childish clothing offered. I suppose it wasn’t a big
leap from some of the stuff I’d already been wearing;
homemade loincloths, cod pieces, togas, skirts, dhotis,
kilts… and it was whilst I had wrapped a towel around me
like a diaper that I realised just how much I liked the
sensation of something between my legs.
I wanted to
dress as a baby even if I didn’t want to be treated as
one, well not to begin with anyway.
*
When mom had
discovered my craving (that revealing towel wrapped
around and pinned just so) I was seven years old. She
didn’t appear concerned that her potty-trained little
boy would happily want to envelop himself in a makeshift
diaper. She asked if I liked what I was doing, and as
she seemed OK about it, I volunteered the fact that I’d
always liked the feeling that a diaper gave me – of
comfort and safety.
I’m sure I
didn’t use those exact words but she seemed to
understand what I wanted and didn’t mind me continuing
to wear such items. She asked if I liked wetting myself
but in truth I hadn’t done so at that point and found
the idea a bit yukky. She bought me a couple of large,
terry style cloth squares, showed me how to fold them
myself and how to pin them tightly so they wouldn’t sag
too much. I actually liked the sag, the bulkiness when I
sat down or played around was… wonderful. Sometimes the
looseness sent a tickle between my thighs and bottom
which made me smile and wriggle gleefully. For obvious
reasons I didn’t wear them for school only when at home
or in the holidays but, as I grew older, mostly in
private.
*
Mom has always
been very understanding. She reckons from that very
first time she saw her seven year-old son wearing a
diaper again she thought I looked so damn cute she just
wanted to scoop me up and hug me forever.
We did (and do)
a lot of cuddling and even as I’ve grown bigger and
gotten older, we still have the same relationship. I
simply prefer diapers around the house and to sleep in.
In fact, I’m not sure I’d get a good night’s sleep these
days without them. There’s just something about a thick
diaper hugging you as you drop off to sleep that is very
satisfying.
It’s not often
that I wet them when I’m asleep but occasionally I have
done… though after that first time, mom insisted I wear
plastic pants over them when I went to bed. She pointed
out that even though I wore thick padding, it still
leaked and, though she didn’t mind the diaper wearing,
she wasn’t in favour of more unnecessary laundry.
However, there
was something strangely satisfying the first time I wet
on purpose. I was wearing a disposable and nervously
thought I’d just experiment and see what it was like. As
I tentatively let go I was so sure it would leak all
over the place and run down my legs that it took me by
surprise how efficiently it soaked up all my pee. A few
seconds after I’d done it I couldn’t believe I didn’t
feel all that wet and wondered where all the liquid had
gone. Soon after I felt my disposable pressing and
rubbing against my thighs and the front of my shorts had
filled out. It was firm and solid and I was totally
amazed at how a disposable was taking away any
responsibility or guilt about wetting and was thankfully
storing it away until I could dispose of it. The whole
process had been a revelation and one I had no trouble
pursuing on many more occasions.
Mom’s demand
that I wear vinyl protection over my diapers didn’t seem
unreasonable and as she went to the trouble to buy a few
pairs of plastic pants, I wore them over my padding in
bed. I quite like the feel and now I’m used to them
(I’ve been wearing them continually ever since she first
suggested it) there is certainly something special
having that extra layer and they’ve prevented wet sheets
on more than one occasion.
Sometimes, when
I’m wearing my pyjamas over them, I love the feeling as
they slip around the shiny pants and they slide up and
down my legs as I wiggle in utter contentment. Mum says
she loves those occasions when I’m dressed for bed, PJs
over my diaper, and we’re sat cuddling on the sofa
watching TV. She says there is something very comforting
when she pats my padded bottom and I rustle around in
complete happiness.
There’s no doubt
about it – I’m a momma’s boy.
*
New School
2
Mom has let
me wear a diaper when I wanted but insisted that at
school I should stick to briefs. This was ideal because
I didn’t really want to share my diaper loving ways with
any of my school mates as I guessed they would make fun
or not want to be friends with such a baby.
Nevertheless, as
soon as the school bus dropped me off, I’d rush home,
strip out of my clothes and slip into my diaper. I
always keep a pair of shorts nearby just in case anyone
calls before mom gets home and I need to hide my padded
bum from view.
Her
encouragement kept pace as I grew up and with dad hardly
ever being at home (he worked away most of the time) his
opinion didn’t matter, although to be fair, when he did
see me dressed that way he just thought it was a phase I
was going through and left me to it.
However, after
mom and dad divorced (being away so much mom thought it
inevitable that he would ‘stray’ so when it happened it
wasn’t so much of a surprise to her) she clung to me
even more and it has to be said I found a great deal of
happiness being hugged and cuddled by her. Often we’d
both be in tears over something or other but she’d pat
my cushioned bum and rock me in her arms and the world
didn’t seem as cruel. She called me her baby, which I
suppose most mothers think of their children in such a
way no matter how old they get. She let me be as young
as I wanted to be whilst in her arms; the rustling of my
plastic pants seemingly giving her some kind of
consolation to her marital problems.
*
I have to
confess something at this point.
I really loved
being babied. I know I shouldn’t have but I’d let myself
slip into that dependent role with unbelievable ease.
Mom I think just needed some love, which I supplied with
conviction but I found myself letting her make choices,
take control and even change my diapers. Of course, once
she’d changed them for that first time in many a year,
it was easy to let her do it again. I loved the
tenderness, the affection, the intimate touch of mommy
looking after me. I cherished our mutual love for each
other, the caring way we interacted. Mom saw I had more
than a need for diapers and, typical of her, she made
sure I got it.
*
Later, she was
the one who bought me the extra items like, larger
rubber pants, pacifiers, baby-bottles and an assortment
of clothes she thought I’d look ‘sweet’ wearing. So,
when mom held me in her lap, whilst I sucked on a warm
bottle of milk, I found the hugs and cooing so
reassuring. It made it easy to relax and enjoy the
comforting sensations that ran through my body. The
fluffy onesie buttoned over the thick, soft wadded
diaper making me seem enormous ‘down there’ but always
feeling snuggly. She’d pat my bare
legs and whisper sweet and soothing words so I suppose
mom appeared to get as much satisfaction out of babying
me as I did. It was strange, it seemed that as I got
older she was happy for me to be younger and, perhaps
surprisingly, I didn’t mind that arrangement.
I don’t think
any of this was a response to daddy leaving us. In fact,
I’d been doing this, or certainly heading in that
direction, quite some time before the divorce happened.
However, I became centre of mom’s world and I think in
some ways it helped when I gave myself over to her
maternal feelings. She appeared to love the babyish
costumes and the bouts of baby talk we’d fall into and,
as she kept repeating, no matter how big or old I got,
I’d always be her sweet little baby.
I normally wore
fabric diapers though sometimes, if they were in the
wash, mom would let me have disposables or pullups.
Oddly, it took me a while to get used to them in
preference to my terry diapers but, once I’d slept in
them for a couple of nights, I was hooked and quite
happily swapped between the two different styles – both
gave me the bolstering pleasure I needed.
*
If you’ve
never had the satisfaction of diapers since you’ve
‘grown up’ might I suggest you give them a try? I know
there will be some reluctance, perhaps not want to come
across as a big baby or weirdo or some such thing but I
bet you anything - you’ll get more out of the experience
than your ever thought you might. Don’t fight the urge,
just tape yourself in and give yourself over to the
wonderful slippery comfort of your inner toddler.
*
Something else
mom said she noticed was that compared to my friends, I
didn’t have that hopeless angst that quite a few of them
carried around. I was diligent (if not particularly
brilliant) with my school work, I helped mom around the
house, we had a terrific relationship and I never found
it difficult to relate to other people, no matter what
age. Mom reckoned that there would be other parents who
would give their right-arm to put their kids in diapers
if the result was they had a loving son like me.
When mom said
stuff like that I’d blush but really I’d be pretty
proud.
However
wonderful our life together was, she thought I should,
if I could, meet other people with a similar interest.
So, while I was sleeping, she would be on the internet
trying to find contacts and information about ‘support
groups’ or some such thing. From one of the online
stores where she bought some of the special ‘babywear
‘she liked me to wear had given her a web address, which
she’d been investigating to see if it was age
appropriate. After many emails (though I don’t know if
she actually spoke to anyone), she came to the
conclusion that it was OK and it was time for me to
experience other diaper wearers.
So, this is
where the trek across the country, mom’s new job and my
new start at ‘ALEXIARES and ANICETUS ACADEMY’ begins.
*
New School
3
We moved
everything.
The company mom
was going to be working for had found us an apartment in
a rather nice leafy part of town. Most of our neighbours
either had jobs at the facility or were somehow
connected in the supply chain. The Academy was for
‘special’ children but, as I hadn’t needed to pass any
entrance exams or attend any interviews, I was grateful
to mom for finding a place where she was convinced I’d
be ‘settled’.
A new beginning
in a strange place was a little daunting but mom had
done her best to find a location where we’d both be
happy. I was more than OK with this, I knew she wouldn’t
have taken us anywhere we were going to feel outcasts or
lonely. So now, just after my twelfth birthday, she
thought it time I met others who shared my interest.
*
I thought it a
little odd that this school term started a few weeks
before I expected but put this down to different
education authorities having their own programme which
we, as outsiders, would simply have to get used to. On
that first morning I was incredibly surprised to find
mom had laid out my school uniform and just what that
‘uniform’ comprised of. I looked at her in a very
quizzical way but she was all smiles and encouragement
and told me everything would be alright. She was also
keen to help me dress and turned my doubts into a series
of giggles and laughter. Whatever reservations I had mom
certainly wasn’t sharing them as I was joyfully made
ready.
Mom took me to
the Academy, a large imposing building on the outskirts
of the city and knocked on the rather grand oak door.
She had made sure I was dressed correctly – not the
uniform I had to wear at my last school but something
different; diaper, plastic pants, onesie tightly holding
it all together, pacifier and my comfort blanket.
My backpack held replacements and extra
disposables instead of books but mom said that the
‘teachers’ at this school would make sure I had
everything else I needed and not to worry. The outfit I
thought was rather strange for the first day of term but
she assured me I’d be OK.
By now I really
loved being dressed and cared for as a baby, even though
I knew school would prove awkward. However, this was
strange even in my strange world of dress-up. I briefly
wondered if mom was returning me to kindergarten and I’d
be spending my time with pre-schoolers, which actually
didn’t bother me that much if she did.
Although I liked
all these babyish things I was worried that my fixation
(as mom occasionally called it) might look bizarre and
uncomfortable out in the real world. Up until that
moment, the only place I’d worn this type of clothing
was in the privacy of my own home. But I trusted mom
completely and, no matter how nervous I was, knew she
wouldn’t let me be somewhere that wasn’t safe.
*
The door swung
open and a lady, dressed like a very up-market nurse,
greeted us.
“Ah, Mrs Grohm
and… Davey… isn’t it?”
She smiled and
beckoned me and mother in.
I sucked on my
pacifier as I suddenly felt very shy, vulnerable and way
out of my depth.
“Mrs Grohm,” she
looked over to mother still smiling her cheerful
welcome, “how wonderful of you to bring you sweet baby
boy Davey here… “
She looked
questioningly at mom.
“Is it OK to
call him by that name?”
I was still
nervously looking down at my thick diaper and the way it
was bulging out around my onesie, the snaps emphasising
just how thick my protection was.
Mom tried to
clarify.
“David is the
new boy so, if that’s how the academy refer to their,
er, students?”
Now it was mom’s
turn to look a little bit unsure.
The nursey
looking lady beamed.
“Davey is such a
friendly name and we want all our babies and toddlers to
be happy here.” She continued, “Let me show you around
and I’m sure Davey will soon fit in.”
*
‘Babies and
toddlers’ it was three words that hit me right between
the eyes.
Surely that
wasn’t what mom was expecting me to become, was it? I
know I enjoyed playing my part and being delighted when
she let me wear the clothing but, a place where I was
expected to be a baby all the time? I just couldn’t
believe mom would want that.
The school was
set out like a huge nursery. As I walked in there were
about twenty to thirty other ‘kids’ charging around
wearing toddler clothes or just their diapers. Their
ages ranged from maybe five to fifteen, maybe sixteen,
maybe older but the place was alive with noise, fun,
laughter, shouting, squealing, screaming, crying and
that overpowering smell of babies – urine and powder.
“Sweetheart,”
she squeezed my hand to get my attention. “For the next
few weeks I’m going to be very busy with my new job.”
I could tell
what she was about to say was going to be difficult for
her.
“Because of that
I wanted to give you something that I thought, er, hoped
would be a place where you’d be happy.”
She gave me a
sorrowful look.
“So, you will be
staying here with these nice people for the time I’m
away…”
*
The reality
struck - Mommy was leaving me here to live as she
thought I’d like. A situation I was okay with at home
but doubted I wanted to live all the time… and without
her around to… well… be there for me.
She’d wanted it
to be a nice surprise but I was in shock.
I think she knew
that if she’d told me she had to go away for any length
of time I’d be upset and possibly a little too emotional
to be left and I probably wouldn’t have given the
Academy a chance.
As mom
explained, it was several weeks before I needed to start
school properly but she had to go on courses and
generally be unavailable to me for a few weeks and hoped
this would be a wonderful and welcome surprise.
When she saw the
colour drain from my face, my shoulders slump and my
face screw up ready to bawl, she realised that perhaps
it wasn’t that great an idea after all.
I certainly
didn’t want to be parted from mom. We’d never been apart
and I could see that the separation was going to be as
difficult for her as it was for me.
There were tears
in her eyes and my blubbing was muffled by sucking on my
pacifier.
I’d never felt
more like a vulnerable and sad little toddler.
“Sweetheart, I
thought you’d be happy.”
My tears told
her otherwise.
*
New School
4
Actually, it
wasn’t the place that I was crying about, it was that
mommy wouldn’t be around for a while and, as we’d never
been separated before, this was what I found scary.
“Don’t be sad.”
A little voice said next to me.
I looked and it
was a girl my age looking concerned but dressed as a two
year-old, her long blonde ringlets framing her sweet
face. Blue eyes sparkled with concern but also held the
promise of cheeky fun - she stretched out a hand for me
to take.
Mom released
mine to let me go but I didn’t feel able to move. She
gave me a gentle push on my padded bottom and at the
same time a younger, perhaps seven years old, joined the
girl and asked if I wanted to come and “pway?”
*
Now mom was no
longer holding my hand they each took one and led me off
to join in with a group of noisy kids. I nervously stood
watching as diapered children ran around screaming and
shouting. There appeared to be no age barrier as they
mixed together laughing and not in the least bit
constrained by what they wore, just like toddlers.
The little boy,
who was ginger-haired and freckle-faced, shoved a
plastic sword into my hand, told me I was a knight and
that we were rescuing a princess from the castle, a
large bank of soft colourful blocks on top of which sat
our damsel in distress. She looked gorgeous, pale blue
satin frock surrounded by lace and matching panties that
obviously covered an equally spectacular diaper.
I didn’t get a
chance to be reticent because a different boy and girl
then led the charge which I was caught up in. Before
long I was immersed in a brilliant game which only came
to an end when we stopped for snacks.
*
It was then I
noticed mom was smiling and chatting to the nursey type
lady. She waved and I waved back she knew what I needed
better than I did. I rushed up to give her a hug.
“Thanks mom…
this place is great.”
“Look
sweetheart, I now I should have explained about staying
here earlier but, I wanted you to see and experience the
place before you made any decision.”
She saw the sad
look on my face.
“I don’t want to
leave but, I have a job and new programmes to learn,”
she shook her head and made the funny look of a
simpleton, “and I wanted somewhere where I thought you’d
be happy and safe.”
I knew she was
right but I was scared I’d miss her too much and oddly
enough a ripple or fear ran through my body that set me
filling my diaper.
There was so
much going on in my head.
Firstly I didn’t
know places like this one existed. Secondly, I was going
to be without mom. Thirdly, I was having a great time
with all these other kids and loved their juvenile
attitude, no matter how old they were. I’d played for a
few incredible hours with these other kids and not
thought about anything other than having fun but now,
well…
Mom noticed my
change of expression, so did the nursey lady.
“Oh-ho, I think
somebody needs a change.”
And before I had
chance to protest the nurse took my hand and led me over
to a separate changing area.
*
I wasn’t alone,
a boy and girl, both older than me were being changed
side by side. Two nurses were seeing to the clean-up and
the fluttering of disposables being flapped out of their
packing spread a nice smell of baby powder around the
place. Of course there were all kinds of sweet smelling
ointments, gels and powder filling the air, which
thankfully camouflaged the other all-pervading smell of
kiddie accidents.
Disposables were
swiftly changed, the rustle of plastic pants pulled up
and onesies snapped back into position with superb
efficiency was a wonder and whilst watching the others
getting sorted out, so was I.
The boy and girl
who’d just been changed waited for me so, once my onesie
was connected back over my clean but bulkier diaper, we
set off on our next crinkly adventure.
*
When I returned
to mom she asked if I’d had a good time. I had to admit
it had been the best… I loved having friends to play
with; it was such a new and liberating experience… I
wasn’t on my own any longer.
“Well
sweetheart, this is going to be your new home for a
short while at least and, whilst I’m away on the course
I have to attend, you will be staying with these other
boys and girls who live here.”
I could feel my
lips quivering and my eyes mist up.
“I won’t be gone
long and when I get back… I’ll bring you a lovely
present.”
She knew that’s
not what I was angling for but the thought did cheer me
up a little. She pulled me in for a cuddle and patted my
large bulky diaper.
“This place is
made for people like you Sweetheart. I only wish I’d
found it sooner... you’ve spent an awful lot of time on
your own… now you don’t need to, you’ll have friends.”
She gave a
little shrug.
“Well, we’re
here now and I think this is just what my little Davey
needs.”
She kissed the
top of my head.
“Do you think
you’ll be OK for a couple of weeks?”
My head was
embedded in the comfort of mom’s breasts.
I knew mom had
work to go to and responsibilities to her new company as
well as me, and she’d found what amounted to an absolute
oasis for people with my… special needs.
“I’ll be fine
mommy, er mom… I er, (sniffle) should be happy here.”
Though it would
be a wrench - mom had her things to do and I shouldn’t
stand in her way, which intriguingly, as I was dressed
as a toddler, was the most adult thought I’d had… ever.
Had she told me
of her proposal before I would have doubted such a place
could happen and would have protested about being left
in someone else’s care. However, now I’d experienced
what was on offer I couldn’t fault mom’s scheme. I’d
never had so much fun in such a short space of time… and
with others… not just on my own. It was GREAT.
*
We hugged, I
didn’t want to let her go, but eventually I perceived
warmth spreading around my groin. It wasn’t a sign; it
was just how it turned out. The fabric was filling with
ease now I didn’t have to worry and mom saw I was
comfortable with those around me; loads of equally happy
‘kids’ wearing thick protection and not caring.
The entire
ambience of the ‘academy’ was one of fun and activity.
It wasn’t a place for real learning but a location to
use when the need for such a diversion was paramount. It
was like a hotel or an all-inclusive holiday break, a
vacation designed for those who had a particular
yearning… our particular yearning.
Eventually, I’d
have to return to a ‘proper’ school, a new semester
started in a few weeks’ time. Mum would be back in time
to make sure that transition would also happen just
fine. There was nothing to worry about; it was just a
new school, with no doubt a completely different
uniform. In the meantime, this was
nothing less than a kiddie paradise.
I was left under
the excellent supervision of Miss Darling, the nursey
looking lady who’d greeted us on our arrival. Mom had
already unpacked all the items she thought I’d need and
anything else, the academy would supply. In fact, all
the nurses/teachers/nannies were wonderful and despite
my misgivings, time past very quickly whilst under their
care.
‘ALEXIARES and
ANICETUS ACADEMY’ really lived up to its motto ‘Vestra
frui pueritia’
*The End*
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