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TRICKED INTO NAPPIES  Chapter 7.

 

 

 

                                          The Babysitter.

 

 

 

     One gorgeous warm summer morning I was relaxing in my tent with a magazine I’d taken from the coffee table.
 Since my forced transition (which I now accepted,) I’d lost interest in comics, now that I felt like I was really a girl I’d become more interested in girls magazines. I loved looking at nice clothes and models with nice makeup etc, longing for the day when I could look like the models in the pages, (As if that would ever happen!)
 As I flicked through the pages I suddenly came across an image I’d never seen before that instantly set my heart racing and my penis to stir.
 It was a picture of a model wearing black lingerie.
 It was quite a shock to me how quickly I was turned on by the sight of this model in stockings and suspenders. I had never seen anything like this before and I was fascinated by them. I studied the pictures in front of me, there were five photos of her in different positions and situations but what I couldn’t stop staring at was the point at which her stockings were connected to a little lace suspender belt.

 It’s strange isn’t it? Those moments when a sexual desire awakens inside of you, like it’s been lying there dormant, waiting for a time when it can be set free.
 I just loved the way that the stockings were pulled up by the suspender belt and how the little round clips held onto them,  and how the stockings were stretched up into a point. Such a strange thing, to be turned on by something so specific.
  I also loved the way that the suspender belt hugged her waist and how the little straps ran down her thighs over her knickers.
 
 I turned the pages, eager to see if there were any more pictures but alas there weren’t.
 I studied them again and noticed that my penis was rock hard and straining to get out of my nappy.
 I slipped my hands inside, trying to get relief but my nappy was too restrictive.
 I considered opening my nappy so I could pleasure myself but thought better of it… I had been expressly forbidden to touch myself.

 I sighed heavily, it had been four days since my last ‘Milking’ and I was starting to get frustrated again.
 But the more I looked at those pictures the more turned on I got, I needed relief so I thought again about touching myself. I tentatively looked out through the tent flap to check if the coast was clear only to see Sandy approach, and I sighed with relief that I’d checked first.

  “Ok Tia,” she called as she approached my tent. “time to come in now!”

   “Can’t I stay out here a little longer?” I asked politely.

“No Sweetie,” came her reply. “I have a lot to do, I need to give you a bath, and then I have to get ready.”
 I looked up at her quizzically. “I’m taking Auntie Caroline out tonight remember? So we have to get you changed and cleaned and ready for your babysitter.”
 I both sighed with disappointment and trembled with trepidation, I’d totally forgotten about having a babysitter and my mind began to
race... this was worrying. I didn’t like the thought of a stranger looking after me, and I started to feel a sense of dread.  Sandy looked down at me and saw that I was starting to look worried.

 “Don’t worry sweetie,” She said softly. “it’s going to be fine, you don’t have to be afraid.”

  “But why do I need a babysitter?” I asked forlornly.

  “Because you’re just a baby Sweetie,” She replied. “ You’re too young to be left here on your own.”

  “But I’m not a baby!” I shouted, with tears beginning to form in my eyes.

  “Oh sweetheart,” She said warmly, as she knelt down to face me.
 “You are a baby, and you need looking after, so come on, don’t cry,” Then, wiping a tear from my cheek, she looked into my eyes and my heart began to flutter. “Do you feel uptight Sweetie?” She asked with a touch of concern in her voice.
 I just looked at the floor and nodded.
Sandy then lovingly ran her fingers through my hair.

  “I think you’re overdue a ‘Milking’ aren’t you?” She said with a real softness in her voice.

 My heart skipped a beat and my mouth went dry as those words sank in, I stared at the ground and nodded again. “well, we’re going to have to do something about that then aren’t we?” She said, her pretty eyes burning right into mine. I blushed bright red as a hot flood of excitement flowed through me keeping my erection hard and stiff.


Sandy then pulled me up and took my dummy off of her finger.

“Let’s pop this in then Sweetie.” She said as she brought it to my lips. I opened my mouth for her and she slipped it in gently and smiled again. Then she took my hand to lead me back to the house but paused.

   “What’s my magazine doing in here?” She barked as she bent down to retrieve it. “Tia you must ask before you borrow things ok?”

  I nodded solemnly, feeling slightly embarrassed that it was opened at those sexy pictures.

  Sandy then led me across the lawn towards the house.
 I felt a mixture of humiliation at having to come in but also a deep rooted feeling of excitement at the thought of what was to come, and as I walked towards the house I felt my penis continue to grow and stiffen with each step I made.
 Once inside she led me through the living room and up the stairs to my nursery, it was a long walk and my nappy swished and crinkled loudly as the bulge in my nappy rubbed against the insides of my legs. Sandy then stood me by the changing table and began to undress me. She went round behind me and began to unbutton my dress, the seconds felt like hours as she carefully and slowly undid each button, my dress gradually loosening with each one and my mind racing, it wouldn’t be long now, I’ll have Sandy’s fingers wrapped around my penis. My heart began to pound and my breath quickened.

 And then a thought came into my mind, I wonder if Sandy has ever worn lingerie like the model in the pictures?

 Images of Sandy in black stockings and suspenders entered my mind and my penis swelled again.

 
“Tia!” Said Sandy loudly. Awakening me from my dream. “arms up!”

 I did as I was told as Sandy gently pulled my dress up and over my head leaving me standing there in just my nappy.
 Sandy carefully placed it back in the wardrobe and instructed me to lay down on the changing table.
Feeling her eyes on me I awkwardly climbed up and laid myself down on the cold changing mat, my huge nappy rustling and crinkling with Sandy waiting patiently and smiling down at me.

 I studied her beautiful face as she hooked her hair behind her ear and reached down to remove my nappy.
 She looked stunningly pretty today, her makeup was exquisite. She could have easily been a professional makeup artist... Her eyes were surrounded with a dark grey smoky eye shadow with hints of purple glitter, and her fluttery long eye lashes were thick with mascara. Her skin was perfect, not a single blemish to be seen and her beautiful full lips were heavily coated in bright pink lipstick and lipgloss, giving them a wonderful mirror shine. 
 I squirmed a little as the tapes of my nappy  were gently ripped open, then she pulled it away revealing my erection to her gaze and I closed my eyes and squirmed with embarrassment.

   “It’s ok Baby,” she said reassuringly. “I’ve changed and bathed you often enough to be well acquainted with all your private areas so there’s no need to be shy with me. Just relax and I’ll look after you.”
 
Then she opened a packet of baby wipes and began to gently wipe between my bottom cheeks. I brought my legs back and opened wide for her as usual.
 
 Sandy’s care for me was a little more ‘Matter-of-fact’ compared to Auntie Caroline. With Sandy, although she obviously enjoyed changing me as much as Auntie Caroline did, her use of the baby wipes was quite quick and functional, like it was just a job to do before my nappy was put on, but with Auntie Caroline, she would wipe very gently, almost like a caress, as if she was cleaning a very valuable painting. She would cover every part of me slowly and carefully and the look on her face was of a deep love and pride for the care she was taking.
 Sandy then took another wipe and began to wipe all around my erection. My penis twitched as she slowly and very delicately wiped it all over.

“There,” She said, dropping the used baby wipe in the bin. “Baby’s all done.”
 I looked up confused, wondering why she had stopped. “there’s no point in putting a nappy on you now Sweetie, I’m going to bathe you in a minute.” And with that she took my hands and lifted me off the changing table, my erection still pointing skyward.

Just then the nursery door swung open and Auntie Caroline came in, my heart jumped up in my chest at the sight of her and I involuntary covered my erection with my hands.
 Auntie Caroline smiled at Sandy and then at me, like she was happy that her baby was being taken care of in her absence.

“I want to feed Tia before I get ready If that’s ok?” She said lovingly.

“Ok,” Replied Sandy. “while you do that I’ll run her bath.” 

Auntie Caroline took my hand and once more I was led out of the room and down the stairs to the living room. It felt very humiliating being led by the hand naked through the house, especially by a fully clothed woman and my heart began to pound in my chest at the thoughtful what was to come.
  As we descended the stairs my erection bobbed and swayed making the humiliation even more harder to bare.

 I felt incredibly vulnerable without my nappy. Wearing nappies at my age was of course still incredibly humiliating, but somehow being naked seemed much worse, everything is on show, there’s nowhere to hide and when everyone around you is fully clothed that sense of vulnerability and shame was increased tenfold.
 
Auntie Caroline led me over to the sofa and, still holding my hand as if she wanted to stop me from running away, sat herself down on it. Then she gently pulled me onto her lap and began to unbutton her blouse.
 I shuddered with anticipation, I’d never been in this situation before, being breastfed naked... it was a whole new level of humiliation.
 Auntie Caroline finished unbuttoning her blouse and pulled it open, then, slipping her arms out of the sleeves she pulled it away before reaching behind her to unclasp her bra.
 I looked away in embarrassment as she unclipped it and pulled it away, revealing her full breasts in all their glory, her large nipples stiff and erect with tiny rivulets of milk trickling down them.

Auntie Caroline gently but firmly manoeuvred me into position, laying me down onto her lap with my head on a cushion, her huge waiting breast just millimetres above me. Then she removed my dummy, raised her breast slightly with her hand and lowered herself onto me, guiding her nipple towards my waiting mouth with her hand. With my heart pounding I took her nipple in my mouth and began to suckle, letting out a contented moan as I did so.
 My penis was still erect and as I lay there at Auntie Caroline’s breast I again involuntary covered it with my hands to hide it, but then Auntie Caroline pulled my hands away, telling me not to touch myself. Then without thinking I reached out and placed my hand on her other breast and gently squeezed and fondled it, spreading my fingers over its huge size and letting out another moan of pleasure.
 
Auntie Caroline sighed a contented sigh and rested her hand on my leg. Then as I continued to suckle, she moved her hand slowly upwards until it came to rest between my legs.
 I wriggled awkwardly and let out another moan as her fingers began to touch and fondle my penis and balls.
 This was the first time that Auntie Caroline had touched me this way. She had touched me thousands of times while changing and bathing me of course, but to touch and fondle me sexually was a whole new experience and I wriggled and squirmed as her fingers continued their caresses, stroking up and down the length of my shaft, and then over my balls and down to my bottom.
 I squirmed a little more as her protruding fingers found my bottom opening.
She kept her fingers there, gently pressing and searching, then, she suddenly moved her hand away and I instantly widened my legs for her as a sign that I wanted her touch to continue.
 And to my relief her fingers returned but this time they were slippery with gel. She swirled her finger around my hole again, rubbing the cold gel around it, teasing me, letting me know her intentions but not carrying out her intrusion. I moaned softly and opened my legs as wide as I could possibly get them, begging her to enter me. Auntie Caroline didn’t keep me waiting too long, after a few more agonising seconds she gently pushed her finger against my hole and slipped her finger into me, I arched my back a little and moaned again as I felt her finger slip deeper into me. 
 
After a few more minutes I suddenly heard footsteps approach, conscious of my vulnerable position I tried to turn my head to look but Auntie Caroline pressed me to her breast preventing me. Instead I opened my eyes a fraction and saw Sandy approach and kneel down on the floor next to me.
 Then to my utter amazement and shock, I suddenly felt her slender fingers wrapping themselves around my erection and begin to move up and down. I squirmed and fidgeted as I lay there on Auntie Caroline’s lap suckling at her breast while Sandy slowly began to masturbate me.

“Sshh Baby,” Said Auntie Caroline softly, seeing me wriggle and squirm. “It’s ok just relax, we’re here to help you.”

I couldn’t take it all in, the sensations were overwhelming... Here I was totally naked, lying on my back with Auntie Caroline’s breast in my mouth, one of her fingers in my bottom and Sandy’s fingers firmly gripped around my penis masturbating me.

  The feelings and sensations of being controlled and dominated filled every sense I possessed, and I surrendered myself utterly.
 I felt a real mixture of emotions, I felt helpless and exposed, manipulated and dominated to such a degree that I felt my body would explode.

 But the amazing thing was, that I now not only accepted it but wanted it! After all this time, months and months of being treated like a baby girl, I finally found that I wanted to be used, I wanted to be controlled and dominated. All my self worth had been driven out of me, and now all that was left was this baby girl, totally and utterly reliant and dependant on these two women for everything. I was nothing without them and happy to give myself to them completely, I surrendered, and gave myself up, willing to be their toy, to use me and have me for for their enjoyment.

Auntie Caroline and Sandy were working together as one now, working together towards one goal and were fully in control. Sandy was on her knees gently masturbating me, her slender fingers firmly wrapped around my throbbing penis, while Auntie Caroline was nursing me and fingering me at the same time.
 I wriggled and squirmed on the sofa as my ordeal continued, My loud moans of pleasure stifled by Auntie Caroline’s nipple in my mouth. My legs kicking and writhing my fingers fondling and kneeding Auntie Caroline’s huge breast in my hand. The situation was so intense, the room was filled with the sounds of me wriggling and moaning, but I didn’t care, I didn’t care if anyone could hear me or not, my mind and body was in the throes of a tumultuous orgasm which was slowly working it’s way up through my body like a powerful wave.

 I was writhing and wriggling on Auntie Caroline’s lap even more now as the two women continued to work on me, my moaning became louder and more frequent, I squeezed and kneaded Auntie Caroline’s huge breast in my hand, stretching my fingers as wide apart as they would go as I continued to suckle. I pushed my face deeper into her breast, my mouth taking in as much of it as I could, her nipple large and stiff in my mouth with thin threads of sweet tasting milk squirting out of it.
 And still Sandy continued with her slow, deliberate and relentless rhythm on my erection, one goal in mind, one outcome expected, and she wouldn’t stop until I was empty.

 My heart rate began to increase, my breathing became heavier, and my palms became sweaty, I felt my whole body begin to convulse as the orgasm seeped up through my loins and into my penis. I gasped and moaned again as the orgasm, rising up like a flood of electrical charge from deep inside me, swirled around my nether regions and up into my penis.
 I let out a stifled cry as the orgasm arrived like a gushing flood from a dam.

“That’s it Baby!” Said Sandy encouragingly. “cum for me.”
 
Auntie Caroline pushed her finger deeper into my bottom, my body twitched, my eyes screwed up, my fingers and toes clenched and I let out a huge cry as I came to a shuddering climax with warm spurts of cum shooting out of me and landing on my tummy.

 “That’s it, good girl.” said Auntie Caroline as three or four more jets of cum shot out of my reddening penis.
 I gripped onto her for one last time as the orgasm faded leaving me panting and breathless.
Auntie Caroline carefully removed her finger from my bottom as the climax slowly died away, Sandy gently slid her hand up my shaft one more time to make sure that I had no more cum left inside me, then she slid her thumb and forefinger over the head of my penis, smearing the last few drops of cum over it making me twitch with the oversensitivity.

 “Well that was intense wasn’t it?” Said Sandy cheekily.
 
 I released myself from Auntie Caroline’s breast and just had time to let out a long contented sigh before Auntie Caroline popped my dummy back into my mouth. I sucked on it contentedly while Sandy slowly and carefully cleaned me up with a baby wipe.

“Does Baby feel better now?” Asked Auntie Caroline softly.
 I nodded and smiled up at her, the sleepy contented feelings already creeping over me.

  “My, what a lot of cum.” Said Sandy cheekily as she continued cleaning me up, carefully wiping my tummy with another baby wipe. Then, when she had finished, she leant forward and gently kissed my penis before getting up to her feet.
 
  “I’ll meet you in the bathroom Caroline.” She said as she walked off towards the stairs.

 Now that Sandy had finished with me I sat up and wrapped my arms around Auntie Caroline for a huge cuddle. I felt incredibly tired and sleepy, and  also cosy and safe as I curled up on her lap.
 I sucked on my dummy and sighed a contented sigh as I pressed myself to her.
 
 Auntie Caroline wrapped her arms around me and gently rocked me as I lay there on her lap, my free hand still caressing her breast as I began to drift off to sleep.
 Then after a few minutes she got up off the sofa, picked me up and carried me up the stairs to the bathroom, I clung on to her tightly as we ascended the stairs, her still naked breasts pressing up against me.
 
 The bathroom was hot and steamy as I was carried inside. The bath was full and had a mound of bubbles on the top. Auntie Caroline gently lowered me to the floor and guided me into the bath, the warm water giving me goosebumps on my bare legs as I lowered myself in and settled down under the suds.
 Then both Auntie Caroline and Sandy began to bathe me. They each had a soft flannel which they dipped in the water before gently cleaning me all over while they ‘Coo’ed and whispered sweet words to me.

“I think Tia really enjoyed her ‘Milking’ today Caroline, don't you?” Said Sandy teasingly.

“Yes,” answered Auntie Caroline as she gently plunged the flannel down between my legs. “I think we should do it together more often, what do you think?”

“ Oh definitely,” Replied Sandy smiling.

My face glowed red with embarrassment as they continued their teasing.

My head was spinning, I couldn’t believe what I was hearing and that, coupled with the sight of Auntie Caroline’s bare breasts as she bathed me made me begin to get aroused again.
 
Once my bath was over, I was picked up out of the bath and dried with a huge fluffy white towel. Then I was led into the nursery and placed on the changing table.
 Auntie Caroline then began to get me prepared for my nappy while Sandy went into the bedroom to get ready.
 Auntie Caroline opened up the baby powder and proceeded to sprinkle it all over me between my legs and my bottom.
 Then she pulled my nappy up between my legs and sealed the tapes, the rustling of it echoing around the room.
 It was very strange seeing Auntie Caroline bare breasted as she cared for me, it was as if we’d crossed a line somehow. Now that she was in control of my sexual needs as well as my everyday care, our relationship had turned a corner, it was as if she was making a statement that she was available for all my needs whenever I wanted, as if she was saying... “Here are my breasts, you can have them anytime” and I found that I couldn’t keep my eyes off them.

Auntie Caroline lifted me off of the changing table and took me over to the mirror by the wardrobe.
 She took out what looked like a thin and flimsy nighty from the wardrobe and slipped it over me. It was basically a babydoll negligee, it was ivory with a white satin sash under the bust, with pink stitching and a white furry hem. It was very see through and was quite short, coming down just a few inches shy of the bottom of my nappy, which didn’t really make me feel any different because the nighty was so thin you could clearly see my nappy underneath it anyway and this made me realise that my babysitter would see my nappy too and a hot flush of fear swept through me and I began to worry. I had to do something.
 It was while Auntie Caroline was brushing my hair that I plucked up the courage to ask her again about that coming evening.
 I took my dummy out of my mouth and looked at her in the mirror and put on the sweetest face I could.

“Do you have to go out tonight Auntie?” I asked softly.

“Yes Tia,” Said Auntie Caroline. “Sandy’s taking me out for a nice meal, we haven’t been out in ages.”

 I began to get scared, she sounded resolute, it was impossible to change her mind at the best of times but this was getting serious and I found myself getting upset again.


“But... I... I mean... can’t I... do I have to... I mean... I don’t think I want to have a babysitter Auntie!” I stuttered.

“Oh Tia, you’ll be fine,” Said Auntie Caroline reassuringly. “You have to have someone looking after you don’t you?”
I nodded slowly but the thought of a stranger seeing me dressed in nappies and looking after me filled me with dread and I began to weep. Auntie Caroline stopped brushing my hair and turned me round to face her,  “Oh Tia,” She said softly. “don’t be so silly, you’ll be fine, no ones going to hurt you. Now put your dummy back in and let’s not have anymore sillyness ok?”

 

After a few more minutes of brushing and pampering, Auntie Caroline placed my hair in a ponytail and then handed me my teddy.

I suddenly felt very vulnerable and clingy towards Auntie Caroline and opened my arms for another cuddle.
 Auntie Caroline put her arms around me and picking me up carried me out of the nursery and down into the living room.
 She sat me down on the sofa and then switching on the TV put the cartoon channel on and handed me the controller.

  “Now you stay here and relax while I get ready ok?” She said.

 I sighed heavily, pressed my teddy tightly against me and stared at the TV, with feelings of dread flowing through me.
 I looked down at myself, my nighty was half covering my nappy but you couldn’t miss the huge bulge between my legs... it’s plastic surface white and shiny under the lights.
 I tried to pull my nighty down to cover it but it just wouldn’t stretch, but it didn’t really make much difference, the nighty was so thin you could easily see my nappy underneath anyway.
 I sighed again and tried to concentrate on the cartoons but it was impossible. Any moment now I would have to endure the horror of meeting my babysitter. I sat there wondering what they would think of me?

 Because of my treatment ie:- the secret concoction of age suppressant drugs I was given (Without my knowledge) I was much smaller than I should have been by this time, but still, to a stranger I still looked like a small teenager in nappies and sucking a dummy. It would be a very confusing sight and incredibly embarrassing for me.
 I could easily pass for a girl, that part of my transition was pretty much complete. (With the obvious exception of my anatomy of course) my general appearance was now very feminine, even my posture, attitudes and thought processes were very feminine, to the extent that I actually felt like this was really who I was supposed to be. ( I had accepted long ago that I was now a girl and was happy to be so) But I never quite accepted my status as a baby.
Questions and worries filled my mind... What would I say? How would I be introduced?
 As the minutes went by I got more and more nervous.

  Then, not long after Auntie Caroline and Sandy finished getting  ready, there was a knock at the door and my heart leapt up onto my mouth.
 I stared at the doorway waiting to see who was coming in, I could hear footfalls in the hallway getting nearer, as my heart beat increased. And then, suddenly, to my great surprise and shock I saw Jessie enter the room.
 I couldn’t believe it. I felt a mixture of huge relief and also one of deep shame.
 On the one hand I was so happy and pleased to see her, but on the other, it gave me a clear indication that my life had been held back, here was a girl that was the same age as me, babysitting me!
 She looked so pretty and grown up all of a sudden, and it made me realise that this was the girl I could have been. I could be wearing nice clothes and wearing makeup, and babysitting someone, but here I was, dressed in nappies and cuddling teddies, sucking a dummy and being bathed and fed and put to bed early, it was all too much to take and I felt myself beginning to cry.
 Auntie Caroline saw that I was close to tears and came over and sat next to me.
 
  “I told you there was nothing to worry about didn’t I?” She said softly.
 I felt foolish about crying but I couldn’t help it, it was yet another symptom of my baby treatment and was also such a relief that I would be spending extra time with Jessie instead of a stranger.

 After Auntie Caroline had issued a few last minute instructions to Jessie in the kitchen,  both Auntie Caroline and Sandy kissed me on the cheek and left.
 The house seemed unusually quiet after the front door had shut and I felt really happy.

 When Jessie came back from shutting the front door, she put her bag on the floor by the sofa, and looking down at me asked me if I wanted anything. She seemed very excited and happy, and all of a sudden very grown up, but it was really strange being asked if I wanted anything by a friend in my own house, and even though I was never permitted to get anything for myself, it still felt strange, and I had the first little worrying notions that this evening wasn’t going to go quite how I expected.

I looked up at her, shook my head and smiled, expecting her to suddenly suggest what we could do together but instead she began to tidy up!
 She ‘Plumped’ up the cushions on the sofa, put away a few magazines that were lying around and generally busied herself around the room.
 And then, noticing that my dummy was on the floor next to me, came over and picked it up.

  “You really shouldn’t leave this on the floor Tia it’s unhygienic.” She said smiling.

 I looked up at her incredulously, what had happened to her? She was turning into Auntie Caroline!
 
 Jessie then reached into her bag, took out another dummy and slipped it onto her finger.

  Then, with my eyes following her in disbelief, she practically skipped to the kitchen and returned with a babies bottle!

 My heart leapt up in my chest. What was this?

  Jessie sat down on the sofa and patted the space next to her.


   “Come up here then Tia.” she said excitedly. “It’s time for your milk.”

  I looked at her pleadingly, my whole body shaking.

  “Can’t I drink it myself?” I asked timidly.

  “No Silly,” she said smiling sweetly, “I have to do it, I’m your babysitter, I’m here to look after you.”

 My heart was beating heavily in my chest as she patted the sofa once more and placed a cushion on her lap. I tried to stand up as gracefully as I could,  trying in vain to hide my huge nappy, all the while feeling Jessie’s eyed boring into me.
 I straightened up and pulled at my nightie trying desperately to cover the huge bulge between my legs but it was impossible, and I soon realised that the very act of pulling down my nightie only emphasised the shame, that my nappy was clearly visible, and that I was trying to hide it from her.

I felt my face glow red as I climbed up onto the sofa, my nappy’s shiny plastic surface rustling and sliding against my legs as I carefully positioned myself onto Jessie’s lap.

I rested my head gently onto the cushion and tried to get comfortable. I pulled again at my nightie, forever hopeful that it might cover my nappy but it was hopeless and it rustled loudly at each little movement I made.
 
 My whole body was shaking with nerves as Jessie waited for me to settle before she gently slipped the rubber teat into my mouth and held it there  for me to suckle.

  This was an insane situation, and the embarrassment I felt at that moment was indescribable.
  I was so ashamed I couldn’t look at her, she’d changed so much and so quickly. Only the other day we were reading comics together, the best of pals, but now this dramatic change had occurred, she seemed so grown up and maternal all of a sudden. She’d gone from being my friend to my carer in a matter of minutes and I couldn’t take it all in.
 
I felt Jessie look down at me as I continued to suckle but I was way too embarrassed and shocked to look back at her, and the embarrassment I felt made me wriggle and squirm, and each time I  moved my nappy rustled loudly again which made everything so much worse.
 I actually felt like a proper baby, dependant and needy.
 I looked at the bottle right in front of me... Jessie’s young slender delicate fingers were holding it steady, tilting it up so I could suckle, it was so unbelievably degrading. Here was a girl who was the same age as me, feeding me just like a baby, not even allowing me to hold the bottle myself!

I mean, I’d obviously been fed like this many many times before by Auntie Caroline and Sandy, and although I’d always found it embarrassing  I’d sort of gotten used to it, but it was so much worse that it was Jessie feeding me. She was my equal, my friend, despite the fact that my clothes were different, and I had to endure a different life to hers, when we were together she felt equal to me, a playmate and confidant. But now a line had been crossed, and seeing her slender fingers holding my bottle, fingers that were the same age as mine, well, nothing more could emphasise the fact that my life had been held back.
 Everyone else around me was getting older and growing up, progressing through life except me... I was the same, kept as
a baby, fed and changed and put to bed every single day, year after year.


As the last remnants of milk disappeared I began to pray that we could now go back to normal, that Jessie would now suggest a game of hide & seek or something... anything to be able to forget this awful situation had ever occurred.

  “Good girl.” she said as she watched me swallow the last drop of milk.

  Those words went through me like a dagger through my heart, our relationship as I knew it had clearly gone, replaced by yet another mother figure. I was so saddened I felt like weeping.

Jessie carefully pulled the bottle from my mouth and helped me to sit up, my nappy rustled loudly again as I took a seat next to her on the sofa.

 Then, turning round to face me she reached over and slipped the dummy off of her finger. “There you go.” She said as she popped it into my mouth. “would you like your teddy?”
 
 I nodded solemnly, still unable to look her in the eye.

 Jessie handed me my teddy and I squeezed it in my arms, tears of shock and disappointment welling up in my eyes.

  “Are you ok Tia?” She asked softly. “you seem a little quiet.”

 I pulled the dummy from my mouth.

    “I’m ok.” I said, unconvincingly, my voice barely louder than a whisper.

  “Ok, well you sit there and relax while I tidy up a bit ok?”

 I slipped the dummy back into my mouth, hugged my teddy and laid myself back against the sofa to watch the TV, the plastic surface of my  nappy slid against the sofa cushion as I moved. I looked down at the huge white mass between my legs, forever present, forever rustling, always there wrapped around me, making all movement awkward.
 Too big to hide, too obvious to ignore.
 
 A nappy of this size is so all-encompassing, the way it hangs down around your bottom and the way it fills the space between your legs, it’s plastic surface rustling and crinkling loudly with the slightest movement as if to shout out to all around, “ Here I am!”
 And as if it could be ignored anyway!
 Even just sitting was awkward, with it’s thick bulky padding constantly under your bottom. Walking was impossible too, it’s sheer size swinging around behind you giving you a pronounced waddle, the smooth surface sliding against the insides of your legs with each movement.  

 I sighed and slumped back even further, spreading my legs wide leaving a mountain of nappy rising up from between them, I reached down and ran my fingers around the wrinkly edge of the leg elastic, pulling it away, then I slipped a finger inside and felt around, it was thick and warm with a strong aroma of baby powder.
 I sighed heavily... Will there ever be a time when I could wear ordinary clothes again?
 

 A few minutes later and I started to feel the need to pee. My face went red as the first signs declared themselves and I was dreading the thought.
 There was no way I was going to wet my nappy with only Jessie for company.

 And then it hit me...  I suddenly realised... Jessie was here to look after me, to babysit me, not just here to keep me company, and that meant..... oh my God no! It was too horrifying to contemplate, she would have to change me!
 This realisation flooded through me like a burst dam, how could it have come to this? My friend, my best friend, would have to change my nappy?
 I shuddered at the thought of it.
 All these years Jessie had behaved so nicely towards me, been so thoughtful in not asking me about my status as a toddler, never once questioned why I was still in nappies or why I sucked a dummy. And now she would be actually changing me?I made up my mind there and then, there was absolutely no way that I was going to let that happen, but could I hold on until Auntie Caroline came back?
 What about bed time? Was Jessie going to put me to bed too?
 All these horrifying thoughts raced round my mind as if to mock me and upset me.

  Jessie came into the room again and asked if I wanted anything.
  I looked up at her and tried to smile but my mind was filled with worries. Jessie had been a good friend to me for so long and now she had grown into a young adult while I had been held back, suspended in time to remain a toddler, dressed in nappies and put to bed, bathed and dressed and fed, just like a baby, while she had grown and blossomed into a pretty young woman, out of school and wearing smart clothes, able to do things for herself, free to come and go where she pleased.
 The injustice of it all swept through me to my core and I felt myself beginning to cry again.
 
  “Are you sure you’re ok Tia?” She asked warmly. “you do seem very quiet. Are you tired? Do you want me to put you to bed?”

  “Nmmm.” I mumbled through my dummy, shaking my head vigorously, trying to look normal as another shudder of embarrassment swept through me.

It was so cruel that this was happening to me, my only friend after all these years had now gone, replaced by a pretty young woman with responsibilities and freedom, while I was still here, reliant on everyone for everything.

 I looked at her, she was so pretty, she always had been, but now she was grown up and pretty, she’d started to wear makeup and nice clothes, and although it was lovely to look at her, I felt a strong jealousy towards how she looked and that thought upset me, I didn’t like being jealous but I also felt a huge sense of injustice, if things had been different I could be as pretty as her.
 There were so many thoughts and emotions running through my brain that it was all getting a bit too much.
 I turned my head, not wanting to let Jessie see my tears, but she must have sensed that something was wrong  because she sat down on the sofa next to me and very gently pulled me towards her for a cuddle.
 This act of warmth and compassion sent me over the edge and I threw my arms around her and began to cry.

 Jessie pulled me towards her and gently began to rock me. I leant in closer and nestled into her arms, huge wet tears trickling down my cheeks, but even this act of kindness betrayed me... for as Jessie gently rocked me back and forth, so my nappy rustled loudly.

  Then, after a few minutes I began to calm down, Jessie stopped rocking me and gave me another squeeze, I sighed contentedly and leaned closer into her.  And then as if all my prayers were answered at once, Jessie asked me if I wanted to play a game.
  I looked up at her, smiled and nodded.

  “ How about a board game?” She said. “or Jenga?”

 Not wanting to take my dummy out I just nodded again.
 
 Jessie got up and went over to the games cupboard and began looking through it, finally deciding on a game of Jenga.
 She carefully took out all the pieces and began building the tower on the floor.
 As I crouched on the floor next to her to watch her, another surge pulsed through my bladder and I began to sweat. The last thing I wanted to do was to wet my nappy but even I knew that I couldn’t hold it off forever.
 
 As we began playing these surges became stronger and it was incredibly hard trying to hide the fact that I needed to wee from Jessie.
 The compulsion to fidget, wriggle my legs or squeeze my penis was intense but I didn’t want Jessie to know I needed to wee, the thought of her knowing I was wetting my nappy was abhorrent to me. Better that she just knows once I’ve done it.
 A few more games went by and the surges went away, but then after about half an hour they came back and this time much stronger.

 Jessie and I had decided to play snap, we were packing the Jenga away when I felt another strong surge and I realised that I could hold on no longer.
 I sat there, desperately  trying to suppress it as I watched Jessie shuffling the cards, but inevitably I had to let it go and so within a millisecond of relaxing my bladder a stream of warm pee gushed out of my penis like water from a burst dam.
  The relief was ecstasy and I only just stopped myself from sighing loudly as the pressure in my bladder dissipated.
 Jessie handed me my cards as I sat there motionless, the wee gushing out of me, it’s warmth spreading around inside my nappy which grew heavier and more solid as it soaked up more and more, It was one of those wees that went on for ages, and I found myself getting nervous that my nappy might leak, but I didn’t want to look down for fear of drawing attention to it, instead I tried pulling my nighty down over it again, but try as I might it still only  just about covered the waistband.

 It was always a source of frustration to be put into dresses or nighties that left my nappy exposed. It was as if they were made especially to tease me, I was always pulling at the hem of my dress in the hope that I could hide my nappy but of course I never could.

  Jessie was too busy concentrating on her cards to notice that my fully exposed nappy was now heavy and soaked, it’s outer plastic surface turning a subtle yellow as it became more and more saturated.

 Eventually my weeing trickled to a stop, Jessie handed me my cards and I remained there sitting on the floor feeling my warm soaked nappy all around me, my face glowing red with shame.
 A wet nappy is actually quite comforting in the first few minutes, it soaks up the wee and spreads it all around inside, creating a cosy warm snug feeling between your legs and around your bottom. The nappy itself feels very heavy and a lot harder and quite solid, it’s not as comfortable, to sit on as a dry fresh nappy, it doesn’t rustle quite as much and the warmth is very soothing.
 But after a while as it cools it becomes less comforting, the wetness begins to feel irritating and itchy and the realisation that your own wee is against your skin is not a nice thought.

  Jessie and I continued to play snap but after a few games my nappy began to get uncomfortable and I began to stress about it.
 I couldn’t bare the thought of Jessie changing my nappy but I also couldn’t bare the thought of wearing it any longer, and there was absolutely no way I was going to ask Jessie to change me. What was I going to do?

 Luckily this last dilemma solved itself when, after dropping my cards by accident between my legs Jessie noticed my nappy.

  “Oh Tia!” She exclaimed. “it looks like you need changing!”

 I looked down in mock surprise, pretending that I hadn’t noticed, my heart pounding heavily in my chest.

 And then, to my absolute horror, she gently reached forward and slipped a finger under the leg elastic!
 I was so shocked I just froze.
 Only once had Jessie touched my nappy and that was by accident while we were playing Jenga, it was an awkward moment then  but now, it was as if she’d ‘Crossed another line’. This was the start of something that was going to be very difficult to cope with.

  Jessie then stood up and held out her hand towards me.

   “Come on then.” She said, smiling. “let’s get you cleaned up.”

 Reluctantly I rose and took her hand, the embarrassment and shame smothering me like a heavy blanket.
 
 Jessie was very sweet but also quite ‘Matter of fact’, she guided me up the stairs to my nursery and ushered me inside.
 
 “Slip up onto here then Tia,” she said, patting the changing mat with her hand. “and I’ll get you a fresh nappy.”

 I just couldn’t believe what was happening, here was my best friend, a girl I’d spent so much time with, a girl who was the same age as me had become my babysitter about to change my nappy! It was too much for my young brain to cope with and I felt very close to tears again as she began to prepare herself.
 
 I laid down on the changing mat and waited there miserably while she busied herself getting everything together that she needed... baby wipes, creams and lotions, baby powder and a couple of fresh nappies.
 I stared up at the ceiling and fought back the tears. I simply couldn’t believe it!

 It had taken me years to get used to wearing nappies again, when I first came to Auntie Caroline’s all those years ago, I was an awkward, sensitive young boy, deprived of love from busy parents, I was lonely and insecure, but then suddenly I was being put into nappies and treated like a baby, it was a situation that was totally abhorrent to me, and I fought it every step of the way.
 But as time went by I slowly began to get used to them, and after a few years I began to enjoy the attention I would receive while having them changed.
 But now, with Jessie about to change me, I had come full circle. It was such a humiliating and embarrassing situation having my nappy changed by my best friend and I just couldn’t believe this was happening.

 The thing is… I don’t think Jessie realised how traumatic this was for me. She was responsible for me now, she had a job to do and she wanted to impress both me and Auntie Caroline that she was a good babysitter and could look after me, for her I don’t think it came to her mind that this was a dramatic change in our relationship. But for me… we’ll it was an insane situation.
 
 I lay there on the changing mat, my heart pounding in my chest, and my eyes fixed on the ceiling, not daring to watch or to even get a glimpse of Jessie, I had to try and imagine that it was Auntie Caroline or Sandy who was about to change me but it was nigh on impossible.

 Jessie gently pulled my negligee up above my nappy, revealing it in all its glory like she was opening a neatly wrapped present. I felt my cheeks flush with shame as I imagined the sight before her.
 Then suddenly I felt delicate fingers pulling at the tapes of my nappy!
 The sounds of them ripping apart echoed around the room. I kicked and wriggled my legs violently and moaned in protest as the remaining tapes were ripped open.

  “Keep still for me Tia,” She said politely.
 But I couldn’t help it, I felt close to tears as Jessie pulled my nappy away revealing my nakedness to her.

 This was too much to bare and I turned my head to the side and looked away sucking heavily on my dummy.

 I just couldn’t cope with this at all as Jessie took a baby wipe and began to clean me. Although her touch was soft and gentle as she wiped around my penis and between my legs, the thought that my best friend was touching me there to clean me was just too much and I kicked wriggled with embarrassment.
 Jessie, sensing my distress stopped cleaning me and rested her hand on my leg.

  “Sshhh, It’s ok Tia,” she said softly. “I’m here to look after you, I want to take care of you and make you comfortable.” Then she continued to wipe around my penis, lifting it and wiping
 

 It was then that I had an overwhelming compulsion to open my eyes and look at her. Jessie’s beautiful face was looking down, her expression was one of pride and concentration as she gently applied a baby wipe to my skin, making a lot of effort to be gentle and caring, she had a contented smile on her face which made it look as though she was enjoying looking after me, and this made me think… I began to look at this from Jessie’s point of view. Here she was looking after me when for all I know she could have been out with friends. But she’d chosen to babysit me, she’d chosen to come round here in her free time and look after me, and that, I thought was kind and admirable. And then I thought…
 Maybe she wanted to be my babysitter because she liked me? I mean, really liked me!
 This put a whole new perspective on things and I began to wonder.
 I looked up at her… her face was so pretty even when she was concentrating on applying a baby wipe around my nappy area,  her deep hazel eyes were focussed on her work, and some strands of her beautiful curly hair hung down over her face. 
 Then all of a sudden she looked up, her eyes looking directly into mine and smiled, and I
Melted!
 

  “There, does that feel better Tia?” She said softly as she pulled another baby wipe from the pack.

  I nodded and smiled back. Then I opened my legs wide for her to clean my bottom.

  After Jessie had finished with the wipes, she picked up a large bottle of baby powder and twisted the lid. Then she sprinkled a thick layer of powder all over me.
 Oh that familiar smell…one that I had endured for so many years.
 Jessie then strangely began to rub the powder all over my nappy area with her hand, this was odd because no one had ever done this before. Jessie’s delicate, feminine fingers brushed and spread the powder around my balls and over my penis, causing me to flinch at her touch.
 Then I lifted my bottom for her as she sprinkled some powder onto my bottom before running her fingers over me there too and I shuddered again at her intimate touch.
 
 After Jessie had finished with the baby powder, she then slid a new nappy under me before bringing it up between my legs.
 I looked at her expression as she concentrated on pulling my nappy tightly into position and peeling the tabs apart and sticking them down.
 I wriggled contentedly as her delicate fingers pressed down on the tabs, sticking them down, my new nappy rustling loudly as she did so.
 Jessie looked up at me and smiled again.

  “Is that tight enough Tia?” She asked.

 I nodded, smiling through my dummy. “Good,” she said. “I want to do everything right for you, I want to to look after you properly.”

 After a few adjustments, she looked up at me again still smiling.

 “There, you’re all done… a nice new nappy!” Then she held out her hands towards me to help me back up.
 I took them, my heart pounding hard inside my chest, and my stomach turning over with butterflies, and as Jessie pulled me up, the tapes of my nappy ‘Snapped’ undone.

  “Ooh,” Said Jessie surprised. “what’s happened here?”
 She carefully guided me back down and then proceeded to try and stick the tapes down again.
 My nappy rustled loudly as Jessie tried a few times, but they wouldn’t stick. “I’ve got powder on them haven’t I?” She said smiling. “I’ll have to put another nappy on you Tia.”

 And with that she reached under the changing table and retrieved another nappy, it rustled and crinkled loudly as she opened it out and she seemed a little flustered at my predicament.

 I felt a mixture of emotions as I watched Jessie slip this other nappy under my bottom. On the one hand I felt for her because It was obvious that she was a little inexperienced and I knew that she wanted to do a good job in looking after me but on the other hand this situation was making my ordeal a lot longer and therefore more difficult to bare.
 
 Jessie gestured for me to raise my bottom again so she could slide another nappy under my already nappied bottom.
But when she pulled it up between my legs she found she couldn’t get it to fit over my other nappy.

  “Oh dear,” she said to herself. “I need a bigger one.”

 This was agony for me because I felt so much for Jessie. She was clearly getting a little flustered because she was keeping me waiting in my prone position. I felt for her so much that I began to get upset.  But I didn’t want her to notice because I didn’t want her to think I was upset at her, I didn’t want her to worry or to feel inadequate. I wanted so much to help her but how could I?
 “Why doesn’t she take the old nappy away first?” I thought to myself, but I didn’t say anything, I was too shy and also didn’t want to make Jessie feel that she was doing the wrong thing, plus the fact that my dummy was keeping me relatively calm.

 Eventually Jessie found a larger nappy and after sliding it under me and successfully sticking down the tapes she took my hands again and pulled me up.
 I leant forward and threw my arms around her in a warm embrace, happy for her that her little ordeal was over.
 Jessie wrapped her arms around me too and we both let out a long sigh.
 This is where I wanted to be, it didn’t bother me now that I was dressed in nappies, I was hugging Jessie and she was hugging me back, this was heaven.

After a few divine seconds of being wrapped in her embrace, Jessie then helped me down from the changing table and down to my feet, and my goodness what a difference wearing two nappies makes… I could hardly stand for the bulkiness around me, the thickness of the nappies between my legs was enormous, to the point where I was having trouble getting my balance.
 Jessie pulled my nighty down over my nappies but because of the extra thickness it only came down about halfway.
 She took my hand and walked me towards the door, but this time it was more as a support to help me walk than a way of controlling me.
 My nappies really were a hindrance, the huge bulky padding between my legs and around my bottom swung from left to right as I tried to walk, all the while Jessie guiding me slowly and patiently.

 Eventually we reached the living room, Jessie led me over to our spot by the sofa, my nappies were rustling and swishing loudly as the shiny plastic surface rubbed against my legs as I waddled, this was so degrading.
 
 Jessie gestured for me to sit down and I tried to do it with as much dignity as I could but my nappies were so obtrusive.
 The huge mass of padding squashed against me as I ‘Plonked’ myself down on the carpet.

 Jessie sat down next to me and asked me what I wanted to do, so I took the opportunity to reach out for another hug.
 
 I don’t know what had come over me but I felt even more subservient towards Jessie at that moment, maybe it was because she’d had to physically help me much more because of my double nappy, and that level of care made me feel soppy and babyish. Her care and her patient guidance as I had waddled awkwardly down the stairs made me feel even more needy and submissive, and with that came a longing to be looked after by her, I craved her care and attention, and so hugging her again was all I wanted to do. I felt so safe and secure in her arms.
 Jessie welcomed me into her arms once more and even patted my nappy with her hand while she rocked me, my heart pounding heavily in my chest as she did so.

  “Oh Tia you’re so cute,” she said softly. “I love looking after you and being your babysitter. You’re such a beautiful baby.”

 I almost cried with happiness at these words, and I found myself nestling deeper into her arms and squeezing her as much as I could, my enormous nappy rustling so loudly with each little movement I made. I was so very happy and wanted this moment to last forever but I also wanted to tell Jessie how I felt about her, I wanted so badly to tell her that I loved her, I was scared of her reaction, but despite this apprehension the moment felt right, so I took out my dummy and with my quivering voice reduced to a soft whisper, I said,

 “I… I Lo… I like having you as my babysitter too.” I was annoyed at myself for not being brave enough to say it but to my surprise Jessie pulled away and looked searchingly into my eyes.

 “Really!” She said, her expression a mixture of shock and happiness. “do you really?”

 I nodded and smiled at her.

  “Yes,” I said, my heart pounding so hard in my chest I was shaking. “I… I want to be your baby, and for you to look after me forever!”

  Jessie’s whole face lit up with a huge beaming smile.

  “That’s what I want too!” She said excitedly, taking my hands in hers.

 It was a beautiful moment, and one I will never forget.
 We smiled at each other again and then she kissed me on the cheek!

  “Shall we play another game?” She said eagerly.

  I couldn’t answer, I was in shock at having just been kissed, even if it was just on the cheek. Right then I felt like I was on a wave of happiness and love, I was finally getting where I wanted to be regarding Jessie and it was overwhelming.

 Jessie released my hands and ventured over to the games cupboard to find something for us to play, but as she did so the feelings of happiness and love I had for Jessie suddenly spilled over and I started to cry.

 Jessie must have heard me weeping because she quickly turned around to look at me.

 “Oh Tia!” She said urgently, as she came back over to me. I looked up at her as she very tenderly wiped away a tear from my cheek, her beautiful face full of love and concern. “Aww, Sweetie don’t cry!”

 I looked into her eyes, intending to declare my love for her but this was the first time she’d called me ‘Sweetie’ and this made me weep harder.
 I stared at her, unable to speak through my gentle sobs, eventually, after I had a little more composure I said,

  “Thank you for looking after me.”


With my bottom lip quivering and my eyes wet with tears, Jessie gently took hold of me and pulled me to her for yet another embrace.

 I squeezed her a little more and brought my legs up, curling myself into a ball, Jessie responded by pulling me even closer, she placed a hand under my thick nappied bottom and pulled me up into a tighter embrace, it’s plastic surface rustling loudly as her slender fingers pressed into the padding.
 Then Jessie took my dummy from me and placed it back into my mouth.

 “There we go Sweetie,”She said lovingly, patting my nappy again with her hand. “You’re so silly, you don’t have to thank me, I love looking after you.”

 After what seemed an eternity of being curled up on Jessie’s lap, we got back to playing a game together, this time we chose Hungry Hippo’s” and as we played I felt like I was on cloud nine.

 But as is the way of life, and especially my life, happy times must come to an end, and after our fourth game of Hungry Hippos and a few cartoons from
The TV, Jessie looked up at the clock and announced that it was bedtime.

 I looked at her incredulously, was my best friend actually telling me to go to bed?

 “It’s past your bedtime Tia,” she exclaimed. “I’ve let you stay up an extra half an hour, you really should be in bed now.”

   “But it’s still light!” I said, almost forgetting that I was talking to Jessie. “Pleeeease can I stay up a little longer?”

  “No Tia,” Jessie replied. “I promised Auntie Caroline that I would put you to bed on time.”

 My heart sank as Jessie got up and offered her hand to me.  “C’mon baby.” She said.

  I don’t think I had ever felt so ‘Mixed-up’ emotionally. On the one hand I was happy and totally at peace with the level of care and attention Jessie was showing me as my babysitter, but on the other it was absolutely absurd that she was making me go to bed. I felt a real mixture of emotions, happy, safe and secure, and yet upset and frustrated.
 Jessie once again carefully and patiently guided me up the stairs to my nursery, my double nappy making my progress slow and tricky.

 Once inside Jessie led me over to the mirrored wardrobe and began to undress me. This too felt strange and yet comforting, my brain really couldn’t cope with all this.
 Jessie removed my flimsy nightie and untied the ribbon in my hair.
 Then she took a brush and began to brush it, and I immediately felt better, I loved having my hair brushed, and now that it was Jessie who was brushing it, it was extra special.

  This was another wonderful moment and I was loving it…
 For years now all I’ve ever wanted was for me and Jessie to pamper each other, to do our makeup together and to try on clothes and brush each other’s hair, natural girly things. This was the nearest I’d got to it but it was still tinged with a frustration, because we weren’t equals, I was being pampered yes, but for totally different reasons.
 After she’d given my hair a thorough brushing, Jessie led me over to my cot, slid open the bars and ushered me into bed.

  “Will you stay with me until I go to sleep?” I asked boldly.

  Jessie sighed with a hint of a smile, knowing that I was being cheeky in asking but also knowing that she couldn’t refuse.

  “Ok, just for a few minutes.”

  I smiled and settled down under the covers,  victorious that I was able to get what I wanted. Jessie went over to the window and closed the curtains blocking out the early evening sun, then returned and took a seat next to my cot.
 Again the voice in my head was telling me to say “I love you” but my brain just couldn’t do it. I looked up at her and smiled.

  “You’re really pretty.” I said softly.

  Jessie’s face lit up with a broad and sudden smile.

  “Thank you Tia, so are you.”

  I took another bold step.

  “One day… Will you… I mean… can you… maybe, teach me to… put on makeup?” I said In my cutest voice.

  Tia looked at me, her smile full of sweetness but also there was a pause as if she was unsure.

  “We’ll see Sweetie,” she replied. “As long as it’s ok with Auntie Caroline. Now you really must get some sleep ok? Put your dummy back in for me, there’s a good baby.”

  “Auntie Caroline usually gives me a kiss first.” I said, fluttering my eye lashes and feeling very pleased with myself for thinking of this.

  Jessie smiled again,  reached down and quickly kissed me on the lips before gesturing for me to put my dummy back in. Then she stood up and slid the bars of my cot closed shutting me in.

  “I’ll be back to check on you later ok?” She said in a ‘Motherly’ tone. Then she left, closing the door very gently behind her.

 I lay there in silence listening to Jessie’s footfalls going down the stairs, my mind in utter turmoil. This was totally confusing and insanely conflicting…
On the one hand I was still floating on air after being kissed by Jessie, and I simply loved the attention and care she was giving me, but I just couldn’t get it out of my head that here was a girl who was the same age as me putting me to bed while she gets to stay up at a normal time and do normal things. And it was this side of the conflict that dominated my thoughts. I looked at the bars of my cot… I was a prisoner! Kept here to live my life as a baby, trapped in this life of nappies, dummies and bottles, dressed, bathed, changed and dominated, totally helpless and dependent for my every need and I was unable to escape.

 How could it be that my best friend, was living a normal life while I was held back, unable to progress, kept as a baby against my will and everyone I knew was ok with this?

 The injustice of it all consumed me and I yet again felt myself beginning to cry.
 And this also frustrated me… why was I crying at every little thing now? I just wished that I could escape this life and leave! But how could I? Who would look after me? I was incapable of looking after myself. In fact, I was incapable of doing anything! I needed Auntie Caroline and Sandy for everything, there’s no way I could survive without them. What was I to do?

   Anger and frustration began to well up inside me and I began to squirm and fidget, and of course, each time I moved, my nappies rustled and crinkled, mocking me, reminding me that I was a baby who was not capable of anything, not even the basic human function of using a toilet. I was denied everything even a child was allowed to do! Held back while all around me were growing, learning and progressing through life, even my best friend, and now she was telling me to go to bed! My best friend!
 It was all too much.
 I kicked my legs in frustration, angry at my nappy for its constant rustling and intrusion, I felt it’s bulkiness around me, constricting my movements, it’s huge mass rubbing against me, filling the space between my legs, a huge padded presence under my bottom, making me hot and miserable, it was so uncomfortable, It made me feel stifled, irritable and helpless.
 I wriggled and squirmed in protest and threw the covers off of me. I looked down at my nappy, it’s white shiny surface wrapped tightly around me, all encompassing. I pulled at it and feigned removing it but I couldn’t, I knew the consequences and that thought broke me, I was beaten, I was a helpless baby and there was absolutely nothing I could do to change that.
 I flopped my head back down onto the pillow and sobbed uncontrollably.


  Some while later I awoke, my eyes felt sore and dry. “I must have cried myself to sleep” I thought.
 I had absolutely no idea what the time was or how long I’d been asleep.
 It was dark outside and all was quiet in my nursery but I could just about hear voices from the living room.
 I sat up and strained my ears to listen, I could hear Jessie talking. “Who was she talking to” I thought, and a sudden fear flowed through me that she’d invited a friend to join her, but after a while I realised that she was on the phone because I couldn’t hear anyone talking back to her, and a sudden ‘Pang’ of curiosity took hold of me. I had to know if she was talking about me. 

 I looked at the bars of my cot… it wouldn’t take much to slide them open, I could creep downstairs and listen. But then I knew that being out of bed without permission meant an instant spanking, but Jessie would never tell on me I’m sure. I sat and thought, I didn’t relish the thought of an over-the-knee spanking but what if Jessie was talking about me to a friend though? I just had to know, and if I was discovered I could always say I was thirsty or something. It was worth the risk.

 I slid open the bars of my cot with my heart beating wildly in my chest.
 I reached the nursery door and picking up my Teddy to keep me company crept out of my nursery and down the stairs, trying not to let my nappy rustle too loudly which was virtually impossible.
 My heart was pounding when I reached the hallway leading to the living room, it was there that I stood to listen. Jessie was chatting on her phone and it seemed as though she was telling someone that she wanted to break up with her boyfriend!
 I was shocked, I didn’t know Jessie had a boyfriend. I inched closer to hear more.

  “I just don’t know anymore Katie,” she said. “he just doesn’t understand that I love my new job, and I want to concentrate on that rather than him and all his melodrama’s.”

 I stood there listening intently, my heart beating fast and the butterflies in my stomach fluttering. I was nervous about being out of bed but also excited that now Jessie was without a boyfriend I would have a chance, and maybe this job she loved was babysitting me?
 This last thought excited me greatly but then, just at that moment I heard a voice behind me.

  “TIA! What are you doing out of bed!?”

 I spun around in shock, my heart leaping up into my mouth and gasped.

 Auntie Caroline was standing in the kitchen doorway her face frowning with disapproval… She was home!

 I stood there, frozen on the spot, incredulous that it hadn’t crossed my mind that they might have come back home whilst I was asleep.

  “Well?,” she repeated. “What are you doing out of bed young lady?”

 I removed my dummy, my heart beating wildly.

  “I… I… I was thirsty.” I blurted unconvincingly.

  “Well, you know the rules Tia. You wait to ask when someone checks on you. You don’t get out of your cot on your own do you?”

  “No.” I whispered.

  “So what’s the punishment if you do?”

 I stared at the floor not daring to look up.

  “A spanking Auntie.” I mumbled.

  “I didn’t hear you Tia.” She said commandingly.

  “A spanking Auntie.” 

  “That’s right.” She said. “an over-the-knee bare bottom spanking, isn’t it?”

 I nodded forlornly.

  “So that’s what you’ll get,” she said. “but you’ll have to have your spanking tomorrow because it’s far too late now.”
 Then she held out her hand towards me. “c’mon, let’s put you to bed.”



 All the next morning I kept a low profile, hoping against hope that Auntie Caroline would forget about my spanking but going on past experience I knew deep down that this wouldn’t happen. 
 So needless to say that whole morning was spent wondering when it would be.

  Just after lunchtime I was seriously thinking that Auntie Caroline really had forgotten, for I had had two nappy changes and yet so far, no spanking.

 Just then the front door opened, and I looked up to see Jessie walk in and my eyes nearly popped out of my head… she was wearing a shiny black very tight mini skirt which made her legs look long and slender and which were dressed in shiny black nylons. She wore a matching short crop top which showed off her midriff and her bust, and a tight black ribbon choker necklace. Her makeup was very alluring too, dark black eye shadow and dark red lipstick.
 It was a totally different look for her and it shocked me to the core. She looked so grown up and sexy, and although I was bowled over at the sight of her, I also felt a pang of jealousy that I wasn’t allowed to wear such an outfit.
 Jessie caught sight of me and smiled sweetly but then was whisked off into the kitchen by Auntie Caroline. And it was that, and the sight of her outfit that made me realise that she wasn’t here to play.

  Sure enough it didn’t take long to realise that Jessie was here to learn some more babysitting skills, and the first of which I wasn’t going to like… at all.

After a while Auntie Caroline entered the room with her large cotton changing bag that she used when out of the house and my heart began to beat nervously. “What was I in for now?” I thought to myself.
 Auntie Caroline placed the bag on the floor and knelt down next to it and beckoned Jessie to join her.
 Jessie delicately knelt down next to her in front of me and as she did so something caught my eye… it was the top of a stocking!

 My heart rate quickened at the thought of Jessie wearing stockings, but I also felt a huge pang of jealousy that she was old enough to wear them and I wasn’t. I stared at Jessie’s legs as she pulled her mini skirt down to cover them trying to get another glimpse, but then my attention was brought to the changing bag as Auntie Caroline pulled out a white cloth nappy and my heart sank.

 The next few minutes were agonising for me. I hated wearing cloth nappies, they were so uncomfortable and obtrusive and screamed ‘Baby’ at all times with their nappy pins and plastic pants. And so here I was, having to endure watching Auntie Caroline teaching Jessie how to fold one knowing all the while that I would have to be dressed in one at any moment.

 And sure enough, after Jessie had practiced a few times Auntie Caroline called me over and instructed me to lie down in front of them.

 I did as I was told, my face glowing red with shame and my heart beating wildly in my chest.

 Once I had got comfortable, (or as comfortable as I could be given the circumstances.)
 Jessie reached forward and gripping the sticky tapes of my nappy pulled them apart with a resounding ‘Rip’.
 I squirmed with embarrassment as my nappy was pulled open revealing my nakedness to them both.
 I sucked hard on my dummy as my nappy was pulled away from under me, the humiliation and shame building by the second.

  “Good Baby.” Whispered Jessie as I raised my bottom for her, my disposable nappy rustling loudly as it was taken away.

 Jessie then slipped the newly folded cloth nappy under my bottom before asking Auntie Caroline wether I needed anymore powder.

  “Yes Jessie,” came her reply. “It’s always best to apply lots of powder to Baby’s bottom even if she’s not wet. She’ll need some more cream too, just to prevent any soreness.”

 This level of discussion while I lay there, prone on the floor in front of them only increased my shame and embarrassment and I found myself turning my head away and sucking greedily on my dummy.

 Jessie applied some cream to her finger and proceeded to smear it around my most intimate of places causing me to flinch and squirm.

 “Ssshhh, it’s ok Tia,” said Jessie softly. “let me take care of you.” 

 After the cream Jessie twisted open a bottle of baby powder and proceeded to sprinkle it all over my nappy area, filling the air with its familiar scent.
 Once that was done, Jessie brought the cloth nappy up between my legs and with Auntie Caroline’s guidance began to pin it into place.

  “You’re probably going to have to re-pin it a few times Jessie,” Said Auntie Caroline. “It’s never tight enough at first.”

 Jessie pinned and re-pinned my nappy quite a few times before finally looking over at Auntie Caroline.

  “It’s not easy to get the pin through is it?” She said meekly.

  “It’s tricky at first but you soon get the knack.” Replied Auntie Caroline smiling.

  Jessie ran her fingers around the fluffy edges of my nappy, proudly assessing it.

  “They’re a lot more difficult to put on but they’re so worth it,” She said happily. “they look so cute on her!”

 My face went red with shame as they both took turns in fussing over my nappy and commenting on how cute and helpless I looked.

 Then Auntie Caroline reached into the bag and pulled out a pair of clear plastic baby pants and handed them to Jessie.

  “These are adorable too aren’t they?” She said, shaking them out vigorously. “so cute!”

Instinctively I raised my feet and pointed my toes as Jessie stretched open the elastic with her slender fingers and guided my feet through, the soft plastic rustling gently. 
 Then, once both feet were through she slowly pulled them up my legs, I could feel the elastic getting tighter as they were pulled up over my knees towards my thighs.
 Then I raised my bottom to allow Jessie to pull the pants over my huge white fluffy nappy.
 After a few agonising minutes of Jessie tucking my nappy under the elastic and more fussing and adjusting, Jessie leant back to admire her handiwork.

  “Ooh you look so cute Tia!” She said lovingly, “I could eat you all up!”
 This remark gave me a stirring in my loins and made my heart flutter.

   “You’ve done a good job Jessie,” said Auntie Caroline as she examined me. “and now I thinks it’s time for Baby to have a bottle don’t you?”

 This statement made me feel so very humiliated, not only the fact that I was being fed against my will, but the way it was said… calling me ‘Baby’. It was very humiliating and Auntie Caroline knew it.

 During those few awkward minutes of sitting on the blanket waiting for Jessie to prepare my bottle, I tried my best to get comfortable but it wasn’t easy.
 Terry nappies are so much firmer than disposable ones, the bulkiness between your legs is so much more uncomfortable to sit on, and that, twinned with the way the plastic pants sticks to your legs makes the whole experience a difficult one to get used to.
 Ordinary disposable nappies are, despite their huge bulk very light and ‘Airy’. The bulkiness feels like a puffer jacket, shiny, crinkly and padded, but light and, well, ‘Puffy’, and the shiny plastic outer layer slips and slides against your skin in such a way as to make it bearable, but plastic baby pants have more grip and stick to your skin.
 Also, Terry nappies make you very hot and bothered and because there’s no elastic, only pins to keep them on, they either feel like they’re going to fall down or they’re too tight.
 So all in all, Terry nappies are definitely something I never liked to wear, and it was for this reason that I only really had to wear them if I’d been naughty.

 Jessie returned holding a large babies bottle filled with blackcurrant, and once again my eyes popped out of my head when she appeared, I couldn’t get over how sexy she looked.
 Her mini skirt was very tight and very shiny. It was so tight in fact that when I looked closely, I could make out an outline of her underwear, and her underwear fascinated me.
 As she approached I stared at her thighs and legs, I could just make out the suspender straps hanging down underneath the stretched shiny material.
 Her legs looked very shiny too as she sat down next to me and as she did so, her skirt rose up a little revealing just a glimpse of the tops of her stockings again, the sight of which made my heart flutter once more.

  “Come here then Tia,” She said softly. “it’s time for your bottle.”

 I awkwardly got myself into position while she waited, all the while conscious that Auntie Caroline was watching.
 And as I settled down onto Jessie’s lap I tried in vain to cover my nappy but there was no point, my dress as usual was too short to cover it.
 Once I was settled, Jessie pulled my dummy out of my mouth and offered the bottle to my lips, I opened my mouth and she gently pushed the rubber teat in, tilting it up a little as I began to suckle.

 This was so very degrading, it always had been, it’s a fundamental thing to be able to feed yourself, it’s one of the very first things you learn when you’re a real baby, and so when you’re a teenager and you’re being fed a bottle by someone, well, the humiliation you experience is indescribable.

 But despite this huge humiliation, Jessie was an expert at looking after me..  she waited patiently as I slowly drank my juice, and she would tilt the bottle just enough to allow me to continue but also lower it just at the right moments when I needed to take a breath. She whispered encouragements to me and told me to take my time, and so after only a few minutes I felt a lot more relaxed.

 The main problem I always had when being fed like this was what to do with my hands. It’s an odd thing to be drinking and to have your hands free, and I was always self conscious about them.
   It always felt natural just to rest my hands on my nappy between my legs but I didn’t like touching my nappy for fear of drawing attention to it.
 On this occasion my Terry nappy was really making me feel uncomfortable. The plastic pants were sticking to the insides of my legs which was really annoying me, plus all the padding around me was thick and heavy and making me hot.
 I moaned with disapproval and opened my legs as wide as I could get them, trying in a vain attempt to get comfortable. 
 Jessie saw that I was very fidgety and offered soothing caring words to calm me.

   “Its ok Baby,” she whispered. “just relax, I’m here to look after you.”

  I tried to forget my nappy and settled back a little more into Jessie’s lap, and as I did so my hand inadvertently came to rest on her leg. They felt so silky and smooth which sent another flutter through my heart and a stirring in my nappy.
 I then slowly slid my hand up her leg until I reached the hem of her mini skirt.
 I felt around with my fingers as I continued to suckle, trying to understand what I could feel.
 I ran my finger up and down her mini skirt, feeling the suspenders, through the shiny fabric, I could feel the little round clip at the end of them and images of those black stockings from the magazine filled my mind and my penis started to stiffen.

 Boldly I continued to feel around with my fingers, wanting so desperately to slip them under her skirt to touch her underwear,
but just then Jessie fidgeted a little so I didn’t linger for too long but instead kept my fingers where they were, but my curiosity had been awoken, hopefully I would get to see what it all looked like.

 After I had been fed Auntie Caroline announced that it was time for my nap.
  Jessie helped me up, my huge unyielding nappy giving me an awkward posture as I got to my feet, and with Auntie Caroline leading the way Jessie took my hand and guided me up the stairs towards my nursery, my huge nappy swinging and swaying around my bottom as I walked.
 Once in I was led over to the mirrored wardrobe and undressed.
 Jessie stood behind me and unfastened the buttons at the back of my dress, I felt it loosen around me as I looked at myself in the mirror.
 Then she pulled the dress up and over my head leaving me standing there in just my nappy.
 The white fluffy towelling and pink headed nappy pins were clearly visible under my plastic pants.
 Jessie then pulled the pink ribbon from my hair a began to brush it.
 I loved this part, especially the fact that Jessie was doing it.
 But this joy didn’t last, eventually it was time for bed and I was led over to the cot and ushered into it with a well aimed pat on my huge bottom.

  I settled down under the covers, took the teddy that Jessie offered me and looked up at her.

  “Night night Sweetie,” She said lovingly. “get some sleep and I’ll check on you a bit later ok?”
 
 I nodded, sucked on my dummy and gave my teddy a squeeze.
   Jessie and Auntie Caroline reached down in turn and kissed me on the cheek before my bars were slid shut.
 Then they left, the door closing slowly and gently behind them. I listened carefully as they chatted on their way out.

  “We’ll done Jessie,” Said Auntie Caroline. “you’re doing an excellent job.”

  “Thank you,” replied Jessie proudly. “I love being Tia’s babysitter.”

  Their conversation carried on as they descended the stairs so I couldn’t quite hear what they were saying but I could just about make out Auntie Caroline saying something about one more thing today.
 And unbeknownst to me, that one more thing would be a real turning point with my relationship with Jessie.

  Some time later, Auntie Caroline came in to wake me.
 She vigorously pulled open the curtains, filling my nursery with the warmth of the afternoon sun, slid open the bars of my cot, pulled away the covers and then, pulling the elastic of my plastic baby pants away around the leg holes, slipped her fingers under my nappy to check me.

 I frowned and moaned with displeasure at this intrusion.

  “My my someone’s grumpy today!” She said mockingly.

  But how could I not be?
 I was a total and utter  emotional wreck!
 On the one hand I was of the opinion that I was getting closer to Jessie than I’d ever been, we’d kissed and hugged and she’d confessed to me that she loved caring for me. And in this she was really sincere and also very good at it.
 I was receiving a level of love and care that any boyfriend would be jealous of.
 But on the other hand, as far as ‘status’ was concerned, we were poles apart.
 Jessie was now virtually an adult, and able to dress herself in sexy clothes and makeup, free to come and go in the world wherever she wanted, she had her own life and could make her own choices, and here I was… trapped in this life of nappies, bottles, dummies, bath times and early to bed. Kept from growing up, emotionally and physically. Held back to remain a toddler with no hope of ever escaping.

  “Is Jessie still here?” I enquired.

  “Yes Tia,” she said. “she’s talking to Sandy in the kitchen.”

 Auntie Caroline took my hand, helped me out of my cot and led me over to the mirrored wardrobe again, my huge bulky nappy giving me a pronounced waddle as I walked.
 Auntie Caroline fetched my flimsy see through nighty from its hanger, stood behind me and told me to lift my arms up. Then she slipped it over my head and pulled it down, it’s pretty lace hem falling just a few inches past the top of my nappy. Then she fastened the little buttons at the back and then tied my hair into a ponytail with a pink ribbon before standing back to admire me.

 Then, smiling and giving me a kiss on the cheek, she handed me my Teddy and led me from the room.

  Auntie Caroline sat me by the sofa, and then went to the kitchen. As she entered, she left the kitchen door open and I soon realised that I could hear Sandy and Jessie talking.
 I froze, straining my ears to hear what was being said.

  “There’s a lot to remember but I think I’ve got it,” said Jessie.

  “As I said, the most important thing is to leave your emotions aside,” Exclaimed Sandy. “just think about what needs to be done, as soon as you let your emotions in you won’t be able to do it.”

  “Yes, I totally understand.”

  “Ok then. So you’re confident you know what to do?”

   “Yes, I’m ready.”

  “Sure?”

  “Yes, I really want to do it. It’s important to maintain discipline.”

  Just as I was trying to figure out what this was all about, Sandy and Jessie came out of the kitchen and approached me.
 I looked up at them, they were both looking at me with stern faces and my heart began to pulse.

 Then Jessie stepped forward and offering her hand out to me said,

  “Come with me Tia. It’s time for your spanking!”

  I was completely stunned and sat there staring at Jessie with a look of incredulity.
 It was just like that moment in the movie ‘Jaws’ when the camera zooms in on Chief Brody.
 I was so shocked I couldn’t speak or move. Did she mean that she was taking me to a spanking? or… Oh my God! The alternative was too horrifying to contemplate. Surely not! I clung on to this uncertainty like a life raft, praying with all my might that the worst wasn’t going to happen.

 Jessie reached down and taking my hand pulled me up to my feet and led me from the room.
 I was so nervous I don’t even remember entering the playroom, my feet were floating, all I could feel was Jessie’s hand around mine and the way she was pulling me along with a real sense of authority.
 A dizziness crept over me, my head became light and fuzzy. I tried in vain to get a grip on reality but I just couldn’t think, things were happening so quickly.
 
   Jessie led me into the play room and instructed me to lie down onto a quilted blanket that had been spread out on the floor with a pillow at one end.

 With my brain in a daze I laid myself down onto the blanket and rested my head on the pillow like I had done a thousand times before but this was different, I was so worried and nervous I couldn’t breathe.
 My mind was spinning… Surely Jessie was just getting me ready? It would be Sandy who would actually spank me surely?
 There would be absolutely no way that Sandy would want Jessie to spank her best friend, it was absurd.
 But despite this assurance in my head, doubts crept in. I tried in vain to block them out but it was difficult because the alternative was so horrifying.

 I looked around me nervously, trying to get some clue as to what was planned.
 I saw Sandy place the spanking chair in the middle of the room but then she went and sat down on another chair! A chair that Auntie Caroline usually sits on when she watches my  spankings!

 I turned round to face Jessie, who had knelt down in front of me, she reached forward, pulled my nightie up to reveal the top of my nappy, slipped her fingers into the top of my plastic pants and rather brusquely pulled them down over my nappy. The soft plastic ‘Swished’ as they were pulled down my legs to my feet.

 This was insane. The level of love and gentleness that Jessie had put into dressing me into my nappy was incomparable to how she was removing it.
 Her face showed no emotion at all, just like a robot focussed on what she was doing. She pulled the plastic pants over my feet and placed them on the floor next to her, then she reached forward again and began to un-clip the nappy pins.
 No smiles towards me, no sweet words, just her pretty face concentrating on her job.
 I felt my nappy loosen as each pin was removed and I let out a stifled moan and kicked my legs in protest, the reality of what was coming finally sinking in. 

  “Keep still please Tia,” she said. “I don’t want to prick you.”

  But I couldn’t help it, even her voice was different. No warmth or caring tones, just instructional and commanding.

 I moaned and wriggled again and squeezed my Teddy against my chest as the last pin was removed. Jessie clipped them
closed and placed them neatly on top of the plastic pants like it was some kind of ritual.
 Then she peeled my nappy away revealing my nakedness to her and patted my bottom with her hand.

  “Lift up!” She commanded.

 This was all happening so quickly and yet the seconds felt like hours.
 I lifted my bottom for her and she pulled my nappy away and placed it on the floor. Involuntarily I pulled the hem
of my nightie down to cover my modesty, it all felt so different.
 Usually during my nappy changes I’d got used to my intimate areas being on display but this felt different, I was being prepared for a punishment by my best friend, how could It possibly feel the same?
 And the thought of Jessie actually watching me receive a spanking filled me with shame and humiliation.
 
  Jessie stood up and offered her hand to me once more to help me to my feet.
 I didn’t know where to look, I certainly couldn’t look her in the eye, I was way to shocked and embarrassed.
 Jessie then stepped right up close to me, and reaching round behind me began to unbutton my nightie.

 I felt shy and embarrassed at how close she was to me. Her small pert breasts were literally millimetres away from my face under the shiny fabric of her top, a little silver zip running down the middle between her breasts was slightly pulled down revealing a hint of a lacy black bra.
 I looked down awkwardly as she unfastened my buttons, trying desperately to avoid eye contact. 
 

Then Jessie took hold of the hem of my nightie and pulled it up, I raised my arms up as she pulled my nightie up and over my head leaving me standing there completely naked and exposed. I felt scared and vulnerable and covered my modesty with my hands.
 I looked over at the spanking chair, and a ripple of fear swept through me, the feelings of impending dread enveloped me and I was powerless to stop it, Jessie, my best friend was preparing me for a painful punishment.

  Jessie took my nightie and popped it onto a nearby table, prolonging the agony while I stood there completely naked. Then she came back to me and popped a dummy into my mouth.
 This was so degrading and humiliating, and it was made so much worse because of the reason for it…
 It was no longer given to me as a comfort, to suck on and feel cosy and babyish, it was now a method of control, my dummy was now part of my punishment, to keep me under control and to keep me quiet during my spanking.

 Then Jessie bent down, picked up the Terry nappy, the plastic pants and pins and took them over to the table.
  Then to my amazement she stood and took her time to neatly fold the nappy and carefully place it on top of my baby pants, then she took my nightie and proceeded to fold that too and place them
all neatly together! All the while leaving me standing there completely naked and sucking my dummy.
 
 It was agony to keep me waiting like this, and was of course all done with the express purpose of keeping me feeling vulnerable and controlled, and it was working.
 The fear of what was to come was building up inside me, and being naked and sucking a dummy increased my fear a hundred fold.

 Then finally the moment came, Jessie approached me, her face emotionless and her manor authoritative, and without looking at me she took my hand again, and led me, nervous and shaking over to the spanking chair.

 And then, to my absolute horror she sat down on it!

 This moment I will never forget. The realisation that it was Jessie who was going to spank me burst into me like an invisible force, knocking me off my feet.
 I was horrified, shocked and upset all at once.
 I stood there, my legs turning to jelly, and I began to whimper and cry.
 I was dumbfounded, unable to move, my heart beating wild and fast as if it was about to burst out of my chest. It was so upsetting.
 How could this possibly be happening?
 Who else on this earth has had an over the knee bare bottom spanking by their best friend?

 Jessie looked at me and patted her lap with her hands.

  “Come here Tia,” she said impatiently. “Lie across my lap please!”

  I couldn’t. I stared at her lap in horror, her shiny black mini skirt stretched tightly across her legs. I imagined myself naked and sprawled across it, her hand reigning down heavy stinging slaps onto my bare bottom, my legs kicking out and me crying and wailing uncontrollably.
 I whimpered and stamped my feet in protest, tears were running down my cheeks, I wanted so badly to beg for forgiveness but my huge dummy prevented me.

 Jessie reached out and took hold of my wrist and pulled me towards her. I half heartedly pulled against her, my cries and protests muffled by my dummy.
 
  Jessie’s grip on my wrist was firm as she pulled me forwards and I stumbled towards her, my knees coming to rest against her legs, those beautiful shiny legs. Jessie continued to pull so that I began to fall forward but instead of falling Jessie expertly laid me across her lap.
 I felt so helpless and vulnerable with my naked bottom exposed in this way, with my head near the floor and my feet in the air. I wriggled and squirmed, my penis squashing down on the shiny fabric of her mini skirt. I placed my hands on the floor for support and tried to find a comfortable position but it was impossible.

  Jessie, that cute playful girl from next door, who used to read comics with me, play games with me, my best friend, was about to spank me!
 The girl I loved, my playmate and my only friend was now going to repeatedly smack my bottom so hard It would hurt me.
 This realisation was so difficult to comprehend, and so shocking I started to cry proper tears.

   Jessie placed her left hand on my lower back, pressing it down slightly just enough to remind me that she was in control, she was keeping me held there until she had finished with me and that I couldn’t escape.
 
 Then she placed her other hand on my naked bottom and gently caressed it, moving her hand down to my legs and back, squeezing my cheeks with her delicate fingers and softly patting it, taking her time, letting me know that her hand was there ready to start.
 I moaned and wriggled in protest the huge latex teat of my dummy filling my mouth, restricting any noises I could make.

  Jessie then pressed her left arm down across my back, her fingers wrapping themselves around my hips and then…

  ‘SMACK!’

  I winced in pain and wriggled, I wasn’t expecting it to be this hard.
 Jessie tightened her grip on my back a little more, and then began to spank me.

  SMACK!, SMACK! SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!….

 Hard stinging smacks came down on my bare bottom, the feelings of helplessness and of being trapped flooded through me and I wriggled and squirmed violently. Jessie’s grip on my back increased a little more as she continued.

 …SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!…

 On it went, relentless, smack after smack with no respite, the pain and hurt and the betrayal sweeping through me like a tidal wave, affecting every nerve and emotion in my body.

  …SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!

  How could she do this? Why would my best friend in the whole world want to hurt me so much?
 With my eyes streaming with tears I wriggled and kicked, cried and sobbed, wanting so desperately to beg her to stop but my dummy was prevented me. All I could do was moan loudly amid the smacks.

   ….SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!

 Fear filled my mind, as the spanking continued, I couldn’t get away, I wriggled and writhed, cried and sobbed but still it continued.

   …SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!

    Then Jessie stopped. A burning soreness came to my bottom and the urge to soothe it with my hand was overwhelming. I reached round behind me but Jessie prevented me.

  “Uh uh!” She snapped. “I haven’t finished with you yet!”

 Those words hurt me just as much as the spanking. She was not the Jessie I knew, she’d gone, she was a grownup now, my carer, my babysitter. No longer the sweet bubbly girl from next door who is always eager to play. Now she wears sexy clothes and places me over her knee and spanks me. I’d lost her.

 I continued to cry, big heavy sobs, tears streaming from my eyes, a babies dummy in my mouth, showing to the world that here was a baby. A baby who would would be dressed in nappies after her spanking, a baby who will be put to bed early, a baby who would be breastfed and bathed.

  My crying died down to a whimper in the few seconds between spankings and I tried to re-adjust my position, I felt uncomfortable with my head right down almost to the floor. I fidgeted around and looked up to see if there was a way I could get more comfortable, and there, right in front of me was a sight I recognised from the photo in the magazine.
 Jessie’s mini skirt had ridden up over her stockings, revealing an inch of her suspender belt, and at the end of it I could see the little round clip pulling her stocking up tightly to a point.
 Immediately my penis began to swell, and just at that moment Jessie began to spank me again.

 …SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!, SMACK!…

  The pain was intense, but I stared at her stockings to try and take my mind off of it but it wasn’t easy. 

 Ten more stinging slaps reigned down on my bare, reddening bottom before Jessie finally stopped.

 From underneath the chair I saw Jessie’s hand reach down for the pot of cream. Then I felt her hand caress my bottom, smoothing in the cold cream around my cheeks… it was over.

  And then strangely, while Jessie was attending to my sore bottom, I boldly decided to touch her stockings. I don’t know why I felt this compulsion was acceptable but I didn’t think about it. I wanted to touch it and so I did!
  I ran my finger along the curved edge of her stocking to the suspender clip. The stocking felt very smooth and was pulled very tight by the suspenders.
 Then I slipped my finger underneath the little strap, it again was very tight and I wondered how comfortable they were to wear.

 And then I realised something… why was Jessie wearing them in the first place? And why, come to think of it, was she dressed up sexily at all?
 There was only one explanation… She wanted to dress up for me. She wanted to look sexy for me because she loved me.
 She knew she was coming today to learn about looking after me, it’s not like she was going out to see a boyfriend and then popping in afterwards, so she must have got dressed in these clothes for me?
 This thought made me feel fuzzy inside.
 Then my mind began to wander, and I tried to imagine her getting dressed in her lingerie and my penis swelled again.
 
 And this sudden realisation came just at the time when Jessie was gently and lovingly soothing my bottom with skin cream. I was definitely right.
 This put a whole new perspective on things.
 
 Just then Jessie stopped caressing my bottom and gestured for me to raise myself off of her lap. 

  “Up you get sweetie.” She said lovingly. Her voice was soft and warm again.
 I stood up, and Jessie kindly held on to my hand to help me balance, my time over her lap with my head upside down had made me a little dizzy now that I was standing again.
 As I regained my balance and the little sparkly stars had disappeared, Jessie gently pulled me towards her again and sat me on her lap.
 Then she took the dummy from my mouth and slipped it onto her finger.

  “You know why I had to spank you today don’t you Sweetie?” She said softly, wiping a tear away from my cheek.

  I nodded and looked down remorsefully. “you’re not allowed to get out of your cot without permission are you?”

  “No.” I whispered, shaking my head forlornly.
 I looked up into her eyes, she looked so pretty.

  “I don’t like spanking you but you have to be punished when you deserve it don’t you?”

 I nodded again, those words ‘I don’t like spanking you’ gave me a new understanding towards Jessie. She had to punish me despite not wanting to, it was something she had to do, it was done for my benefit and therefore was done through love.
 I looked up at her again, my heart brimming over for her, she lovingly ran her fingers through my hair and smiled and I melted.
 Fresh tears began to flow and I threw my arms around her.
 Jessie hugged me and gently rocked me as I sobbed on her shoulder.

 All my hurt and feelings of betrayal melted away like frost in the sun while I was in Jessie’s arms.
 She was so loving towards me and it was so obvious now that she loved me. She didn’t need to say it.
 She patted my back and gently rocked me until my tears subsided.
 Then she pulled away and looked into my eyes, smiled sweetly and wiped away a few strands of hair from my face.

  “I’m sorry.” I said meekly, as the last few tears ran down my cheeks.

  “Oh Tia,” She said, “You’re so adorable!”
 
   Butterflies burst through my tummy at those words and I smiled back. And again that voice in my head kept saying “Tell her you love her!” But I couldn’t.

 Jessie placed a hand on my leg and gave me a kiss on the cheek.

  “I’ll tell you what,” She said, with a little excitement in her voice. “let’s get you into a nice clean nappy and then let’s snuggle up on the sofa together and watch TV, how about that?”
 
 I was so happy I almost burst into tears again.

  I climbed off of Jessie’s lap and held out my hand for her to take. I don’t know why but having Jessie back to how she was after my spanking made me feel super soppy and submissive towards her, and I actually couldn’t wait for her to dress me in my nappy! As strange as that may seem, any kind of attention was ok with me now, and I especially loved the care and attention I received when being dressed or changed.

 My spanking now a distant memory, Jessie led me up the stairs towards my nursery, her soft, delicate but very capable hand holding mine. I looked down at it, our fingers were interlocked and my heart was overflowing for her.
 She was in charge, leading me to my nursery to pamper me and to look after me, and I couldn’t have been happier.

 Once inside I climbed up onto the changing table and sat myself down, resting myself on my elbows to watch her get everything ready for me, my heart bubbling over with adoration. She looked so pretty.

 Jessie went over to the shelf and came back with two folded disposable nappies and placed them near my feet at the end of the changing of table. 
 Then she fetched a tube of cream and some baby wipes.
 Then she looked around for some baby powder but couldn’t find any. She had to get some from the shelf above the changing table so she came close and reached up above me, and as she did so, her miniskirt rose up again revealing her stockings, and to my astonishment, I reached out and touched them!
 Jessie looked down at me in surprise.

 “You like my stockings don’t you Tia?” She said with a hint of a smile.

 I snapped my hand away quickly and looked away embarrassed, my face glowing red with shame.

  “they make you look pretty.” I whispered.

  “Thank you sweetie,” she replied softly, seeing my embarrassment. “don’t be shy, you can touch them if you like?”

  I turned back round and sheepishly touched them again, running my finger over the tops of her stockings where they were pulled up to a point by the suspenders.

  Jessie’s reaction to my inquisitive fingers was quite a surprise… there wasn’t any! She just stood there and let me indulge myself, and I quickly came to the realisation that it was because of my status…

 It’s very strange, but looking back on it now it kind of makes sense… Because I was treated and considered to be nothing more than a toddler, I could get away with touching Jessie’s underwear because I was just an innocent baby. I mean, had I been treated like a teenager, I would have got a slap, but because I was treated just like a baby, I could get away with it because babies and toddlers are innocent of such things. I wasn’t considered a threat, even though I was naked and had an erection.
 It was a very unusual situation, and it was one that I not only realised at the time, but also played to my advantage.

 I lifted Jessie’s skirt up just a little higher and began to fiddled with the little suspender connected to her stocking.

   “Where do these go?” I enquired cheekily, pulling at the little suspender.

  “Would you like me to show you? She said, taking me completely by surprise.

  I looked up at her and nodded excitedly.
 Jessie reached round and unzipped her miniskirt letting it fall to the floor. My heart was thumping like a jackhammer and my eyes fairly popped out of my head!
 Then she stood there and let me look at her before doing a little twirl, and for the second time that afternoon I was struck dumb.
 
 She looked stunning! She had on a figure hugging black lace suspender belt, and a pair of black satin knickers underneath.
 
 I just sat there on the changing table staring, my mouth open with shock and awe. She looked amazing! Just like the model in my pictures.

 Then to my astonishment, Jessie took my hand and tenderly placed it on her suspender belt.

 With my heart racing and my erection growing I slowly ran my finger over the lace, it was very delicate and pretty. Her satin panties were very shiny and alluring too, and had a little rose motif embroidered on the front panel. My penis twitched and pulsated as I gently slid my finger across it.

 Jessie stepped forward and gave me a quick hug before resuming her preparations for my nappy.
 
  I couldn’t keep my eyes off of her as I watched her get everything ready for me. I loved the way her suspenders clung tightly to her legs, and the way they pulled her stockings up tight, and when she had her back to me I loved looking at her pert bottom with the black satin stretched across her cheeks.
 She looked so beautiful, and I again reminded myself that she must love me very much if she’s willing to dress up for me.
 And to show me her underwear like that, and allow me to touch it, well, she must feel that I’m very special and worth the effort and this made me feel incredibly privileged and loved.

 When I could see that she was ready, I laid myself down and spread my legs wide for her, giving myself to her totally.
 I didn’t even feel embarrassed that my rock hard penis was fully on show, I wanted her to touch me, and I was excited because I knew that she was just about to.
 I felt such an array of emotions at that moment. I was filled with sexual excitement, and I also felt incredibly submissive and babyish. I wanted her so badly to mother me, to look after me and in return I would do anything for her and be whoever she wanted me to be.

 Jessie handed me my teddy, and I instantly knew why. She knew that I was always usually embarrassed about having an erection during a nappy change and it was so kind of her to think of me that way, and despite the fact that I didn’t feel embarrassed this time I really appreciated her gesture and it reconfirmed to me that she has, and always will have my best interest at heart.
 I loved her so much.

    I took hold of my Teddy and squeezed it against my chest as Jessie took the tube of cream and smeared some around my inner bottom. I wriggled and moaned with pleasure as she gently applied it. Then she opened a pack of baby wipes, and smiling down at me began to wipe it around my erection.
 I wriggled and squirmed and kicked my legs in a very babyish fashion, letting out little squeals of delight as she very gently wiped all around it.

  “Ooh Baby likes that!”  She said happily. I acted babyish and shy and hid my face in my teddy, thoroughly enjoying all this attention.

 After Jessie was done with the baby wipes she then proceeded to twist open the powder bottle and shake baby powder all around my nappy area.
  I spread my legs as wide as I could and lifted my bottom as Jessie sprinkled the last of the baby powder over me, it’s flowery perfume filling the air around us.
 
  Jessie took the first nappy and unfolded it, making it rustle loudly, she slid it under my raised bottom and positioned it carefully then pulled it up between my legs and over my erection, the nappy rustled and crinkled again as she pulled open the tabs and stuck them
down, my rock hard penis making a pronounced ridge under it, and as I wriggled, the nappy rubbed against my penis giving me amazing tingling sensations down below.
 Then smiling right at me she unfolded the second one and did the same… pulling it up between my legs, bringing the edges tightly around me and sticking the tapes down.
 
 The two nappies together created such a huge mass of padding between my
legs it was impossible to get used to. They interfered so much in my comfort and posture.
 And thinking about it, the act of Jessie putting two nappies on me was similar to putting a dummy in my mouth just before my spanking.
 Jessie had put them on me with the specific intent to keep me under control, to control my movements and keep me compliant.
 And it was true, they did, it was virtually impossible to move or to walk with two large nappies on me, and this is the strangest thing… I realised right then that I liked that level of control.
 I wanted to feel helpless, I wanted to feel controlled, because it was Jessie controlling me, mothering me, and I needed her to. I felt so subservient towards her it shocked me.
 
 I laid there on the changing mat, wriggling and squirming against my bonds, the bonds of my double nappy, thick and bulky, shiny and slippery, rustling and crinkling, overwhelming and restricting.
 I moaned and fidgeted  as the mass of padding interfered with every movement I made.

 And there was another element to this double nappy… it seemed to make me feel even more babyish than I did already…
  Because they were so overwhelmingly cumbersome and restrictive, I kept wriggling and fidgeting and squirming to get comfortable, and this made me feel so helpless. And this feeling of helplessness was in some way a pronouncement to Jessie that I needed her attention, I needed her to help me and to take care of me, and if I did this in a babyish manor then she would be even more forthcoming.
 So I found myself whimpering and wriggling, and kicking my legs in a very babyish manor to make Jessie look after me more, if she saw that I felt helpless just like a baby, she would come to my rescue and attend to me.

 
   After jessie had done her usual checks and adjustments, (something she learnt from Auntie Caroline no doubt). She leant down and gave me a kiss on my tummy and pronounced that I was done.
 I raised my arms for her to hug me and she responded, and then lifted me off of the changing table.
 It took a few seconds to regain my balance, because it’s quite difficult to stand when your posture is altered that much, and Jessie must of been aware because she held my hand to support me.
 Then carefully and slowly, Jessie led me from my nursery, down the stairs and into the living room.

   She led me over to the sofa and sat down on it, pulling me along with her. I nestled down on her lap and we settled, my nappy rustling loudly as usual.
 
 Jessie waited for me to fully settle before putting her arms around me and sighing contentedly, and I couldn’t have been happier. I snuggled into Jessie’s lap with the biggest smile on my face…
 I felt like the cat that got the cream, but I also felt disappointed in myself, for if ever there was a perfect moment to tell Jessie how I felt about her it was then. But I just couldn’t, I was too scared, what if I was wrong?

  Jessie lovingly ran her fingers through my hair and patted my huge nappied bottom with her other hand, the patting sounds were muffled by the thickness of my nappy.

 I felt soppy and cuddly and babyish… I was in heaven.

  I think that that moment was quite possibly the happiest I’d ever been in my entire life!
 Here I was, lying on the lap of the girl I loved. She had her arms around me, and was cuddling me, and had not only dressed up in lingerie especially for me but had undressed for me too! She was taking care of me, dressing me and feeding me, looking after me and protecting me.
 She had control over me and now she was holding me close to her, keeping me safe, and keeping me hers!
 
 I felt so safe and protected and loved all at once, and I never wanted it to change. I wanted to be Jessie’s baby forever.

  I sighed contentedly again and snuggled closer to her, bringing my knees up and curling into a ball. Jessie put her hands under my bottom and pulled me closer, her fingers pressing into the padding of my nappy. I was practically purring I was so happy.
 
 Then an incredible thing happened… Feeling so contented and babyish as I did, I suddenly had a really strong urge to suckle. I didn’t have my dummy so without giving it a second thought I slipped my thumb into my mouth and then, quite innocently, and without realising what I was doing, I rested my head against Jessie’s chest and placed my other hand on her breast!
 The fabric of her top was smooth and shiny and I slowly began to squeeze and caress her breast as I sucked my thumb.

   And then incredibly, Jessie very gently pulled me aside, pulled the zip down on the front of her top and took it off!
 I leaned back in shock, looking at her black lacy bra, and to my absolute astonishment, she then reached around behind her, unclipped her bra and slipped it off too!
 I sat there, completely stunned, staring at Jessie’s pert breasts right in front of me in all their glory.
  And then, without saying a word, she pulled my thumb from
my mouth, and lifting one of her breasts guided my mouth to it.
   I opened my mouth and encircled my lips around her nipple and began to suckle, letting out a long soft moan of pleasure. I closed my eyes, and placing my hand on her other breast gently caressed it.
 
 It was an incredible moment! And it all happened so naturally.
 And because It was Jessie who’d instigated it, I felt again safe and secure, it was her choice, she wanted me to know that she was here to look after me and care for me, and if that included suckling on her breasts then it was her duty to oblige.

 I never thought that I could have loved her more until that moment. She had given herself to me! Shown how utterly  devoted she was to me.

  I was lost in the moment!
 I pressed my face deeper into her breast, taking in as much of her nipple as I could, my tongue swirling and sucking, my fingers caressing and groping.
 Jessie’s breast wasn’t giving out any milk but that didn’t matter, I was her baby and that’s all I wanted to be. I was wearing nappies and I was suckling at her breast.
 I was hers and no one else’s.

The feelings of babyishness increased now I was at Jessie’s breast. I began to let out soft little baby noises as I suckled, I could feel my nappies on me, rustling, crinkling, the mountain of padding slipping and sliding against the insides of my legs, filling the space. I was her baby. I was just where I wanted to be. I was hers and she was mine. I wanted her to change me, dress me, bathe me, put me to bed and feed me. I needed her so much and she was there to do all those things willingly because I was hers. I belonged to her, I was her baby!

  But my utter contentment was also my downfall, for as had happened so many times before, deep feelings of relaxation and contentment always seem to make me sleepy, and so of course my time on Jessie’s lap at her breast soon came to an end closely followed by Jessie putting me to bed.


  When I awoke the next morning I’d woken up a lot earlier than usual. I think it was down to the level of feelings and emotions from the day before. I was still on a high.
 
    The house was silent, the only noises were the birds tweeting their dawn chorus and the rustling of my nappy.

 I lay there in my cot,  going over the events from yesterday in my mind…
 My shock at having Jessie spank me and the greater shock of suckling on her breast while she sat there in just her underwear still fresh in my mind, and as I thought about it my penis began to stiffen again, and the urge to touch myself grew as much as my penis did.

 But little did I know that there was still one more element to my baby regime that Jessie had yet to learn!


  To be continued…

Written by Billy Blaze



 If you like this story then why not check out my other stories…

 Teacher’s Pet,

The after school punishment,

The Imprisonment,

If you’d like to contact me to find out more, then email me at

[email protected]

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