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You know what you've done

It’s the twelfth day and twelve-year-old Robbie still hadn’t acknowledged why he was back in nappies.  

~~~~

He’d woken up on that first day of Summer Break hoping for an exciting time with all his mates only to be greeted by his father looking grim and holding a bundle of stuff in his hand.

“Okay Robert,” his dad was not angry but never one to brook too much nonsense. Standing at six feet tall and having a fairly muscular physique from his job as a builder he looked most imposing. “School may be over but you’ve got a lot to learn so... it’s back into nappies for you. Go and get a shower and come straight back and I’ll see to you.”

Robbie bristled at the idea, as if he’d let that happen. Besides, what could he have possibly done to be returned to wearing a nappy? It had to be a joke, right? Perhaps he was dreaming and had yet to wake up properly because this was just silly. However, why would he be dreaming of such a thing it...?

He found his voice when he realised this wasn’t a dream at all.

“But dad... WHY... I haven’t wet the bed or anything?” Robbie grinned but looked suspiciously at what was in his father’s hands.

“Why don’t you think about the ‘why’ whilst having a shower, but don’t take too long.” Dad indicated for him to get up and get moving.

“Dad this isn’t going to happen, I’m not a kid and you can’t make me... I’m not a bloody baby,” he added insolently.

“Strike one, our little boy thinks he can swear with impunity...” Robbie had no idea what that word meant, “but he’s going to find that there are loads of things he thought... but thought wrong. Now, do as you’re told because this is going to be your underwear until we decide otherwise.”

“I don’t think so...” The cocksure defiance was there but he was wondering...

“There you go again, thinking and has been recently discovered... not your best feature Robbie. Because of all the things you’ve been up to over the past few months, thinking no one would get to know about, have come home to roost. Don’t think for a second you’re getting out of this because sonny, you aren’t.”

The seriousness and directness of his dad’s words made him uncertain. Unsure of what a twelve-year-old could do but, and this is what mattered, he was twelve years old and therefore had... oh... but...

There was also that guilt... what exactly was it they knew about that would bring about such a weird punishment?

“Shower... now.” Dad pointed towards the bathroom.

“But dad...” Robbie reluctantly did as he was told, easing his four feet six inch body from under the warm covers and then padding hesitantly to the bathroom in his creased t-shirt and boxers’ sensing it wasn’t the time to argue. Although slightly smaller than the others he was confident - he was after all in the school’s first eleven football team, and more recently mixing with his new tough friends, thought himself a toughie. However, when called out like this his swagger and self-confidence dropped. He needed more information and time to corral his excuses and arguments.

~

All through showering he wondered what dad knew he’d done. His grades weren’t too bad, granted there was always room for improvement. Although the Headmaster’s final comments on his end of term report card said that he ‘...didn’t try and easily distracted. A noticeable decline in ability and respect’ also didn’t help.

He couldn’t remember being rude or cheeky to his parents but of course such occasions are done without much thought. He and his mates hadn’t been caught doing anything that might be regarded as foolish or criminal (although that hadn’t stopped them from doing such stuff). Mind you, he didn’t want a complete investigation into what he and those mates had been up to, that would open a huge can of worms. Then there was one ‘biggie’ which he knew they better not know about otherwise his life would be ruined - and he wasn’t sure if that was an over or understatement.

Was there a difference between being cheeky and downright disrespectful? To a lad his age it was all part of growing up and having opinions, attitude and actions that might not correspond to what others might agree as normal. He wasn’t that bothered what anyone else thought... only himself... and his mate’s.

The ‘biggie’ was BIG and it weighed heavily now his parent’s said they knew what he’d been up to. His mates had said that no one would ever know so it was just between them but still, as he showered, the guilt cut through his body like a cold, cold knife.

~

Recently at school he’d been hanging around with a little gang who were dangerously close to being young hoodlums and whom he was desperate to impress. He’d somehow found himself in with this particular ‘in’ crowd with ‘attitude’ and liked the infamy by association that went with it. He adopted quite a bit of their style – the way they dressed, the way they spoke, the off-handedness in any conversation. They were lippy, disrespectful, rebellious and took anything not nailed down (and a few things that were). He didn’t come from their rough, tough background so had a lot to prove to fit in. So far, he thought he had but now his parents had pulled him up, he wasn’t so certain it had been that good a move.   

Although in their company Robbie saw himself as a rebel, and someone who thought for himself, the hardened, uncaring streak that his new mates possessed really wasn’t part of his character. In fact, despite his attempts at ‘fitting in’ with his new ‘friends’, it was safe to say that none of what they’d done sat easily on his conscience so more or less knew that eventually he’d be brought to book. But what specifically was it his dad knew and what was it that made him think in terms of ‘nappies’ as a penalty?    

Under the warm plumes of water, he chuntered to himself on how he would never wear a nappy, nor would he let his father fulfil his threat. Despite his absolute intention of not giving in he felt an unease creep into his head -something he’d never felt before. Well, it had but his mates told him to “...forget it ever happened” but it was a hard secret to keep. That secret, that thing, only he and ‘the gang’ knew about and which they’d laughed off as “...a great stunt” was hanging heavily but he dare not confess to it... ever.

He was at a loss to know why his father would want to impose such a juvenile punishment – one that had been threatened but never pursued before. Well, not exactly being put back into nappies but not able to go anywhere, have an early curfew or allowance stopped. All these penalties had been threatened in the past but never applied. So why now AND what had caused this dramatic shift that his dad intended to carry it out?

What the HELL did dad know?

Well, he decided, whatever he knew, or thought he knew, he wasn’t going to wear a nappy and there was nothing dad could do to make him. Of that he was certain.

~

Returning from the bathroom drying himself but confused as to why there was so much stuff spread out on his bed and why had his t-shirt and shorts he’d just slept in disappeared whilst he took the shower? Not only that but the very serious look on his father’s face indicated that any further argument could well be a huge mistake. Still, he’d decided, he certainly wasn’t going to wear a nappy and that was final.

After all he was twelve, and twelve year-olds don’t wear nappies. He may be a little smaller than some his age but on the football pitch he was a little terrier and one of the best players. He was fairly good-looking (or so his mum thought) with longish brown hair and brown eyes. Despite his veneer of confidence he approached his father with more than a little trepidation.

He noticed the thick fabric squares (more than one) which was a bit scary, the clear plastic pants like those he remembered his toddler cousin used to wear when visiting (he didn’t remember the days as a child he also used to wear them). Additionally, arranged on his dresser were a large canister of baby powder and several tubs of ointment. This was not looking like a simple threat, but he was adamant - no nappies.

“Dad, what is it I’m supposed to have done?” He implored as innocently as possible, though dreading his father knowing some of the things he (and his mates) had been up to.

“‘Supposed to have done’ ah! Acting innocent, eh? Well, that won’t work.” His dad fluffed out one of the large squares of white fabric and began to fold it.

“Dad this isn’t fair, if I don’t know what I’ve done I can’t...”

“Oh Robbie, Robbie, Robbie... I think you know only too well why this is happening and you’ve no one but yourself to blame.”

Robbie mentally tallied some of those things and then physically shivered at the more ‘suspect’ offences, wondering if those were also what his father now knew about. However, he figured, if he knew about all of them, and the big one, he doubted if having to wear a nappy for a couple of days would be his punishment it would be much worse. Not knowing was making him less sure and put him at a huge disadvantage. He began to feel vulnerable, especially as his dad was looking more and more determined.

“Dad this isn’t fair,” he was being as firm as he could, “I’m too old to wear a nappy and I’m not going to.” At least he was confident about that.

“Really,” his dad looked a bit more than pissed off at his son’s denial, “well we can visit other, more embarrassing, public punishments if you wish. I don’t think you’ll like them, and, in the end, you’d still end up wearing a nappy... but if you insist.”

The nappy was now folded, and his father indicated for him to lie out.

“It’s up to you Robert, last chance, this now or something less easy, well for you anyway...”

He’d never felt intimidated by his father before but there was something in his attitude that implied ‘mess with me at your peril’. He tried to ignore it but the thing was... a guilty conscience (in fact a very guilty conscience) was getting the better of Robbie - he was uncertain.

He knew he should be making a huge scene and storming off or swearing like his mates and demanding the independence any twelve-year-old deserved and to stop being treated as a child. But he was caught off-guard - what might be ‘less easy?’ but when he thought about it, he and the gang had done some terrible stuff.

The threat got the boy’s attention. His mind was full of appalling possibilities. He’d heard that some of his new friend’s parents weren’t afraid to take a belt to their wayward offspring and the idea of having a fiercely whipped arse had no appeal whatsoever. He dreaded pain, the few times growing up he’d been physically hurt made sure he stayed away from any confrontation where violence might happen. Even being in the gang he always maintained a distance between them and him... just in case.

However, his mind conjured up a terrible situation.

THWACK! (it was as if he could feel it) on his vulnerable bottom scared the hell out of him, not that his parents had ever said they’d do such a thing BUT, as his father was hinting, there’d be worse – public punishments - so that possibility flitted into his head and fuelled his worst case scenario.  

Some of the gang had intimated that physical punishment was almost a daily occurrence in their household and no amount of anti-smacking laws would change their parent’s attitude to discipline, even if it didn’t work. One lad had told him quite openly that his father had taken the belt to him after a visit from the police and he had to sit painfully at the dinner table on a hard chair as the family ate their meal. He’d shrugged when his mates told him what his dad had done was illegal, his reply, so was what he’d done so...?

~

Thoughts of rebellion, of simply refusing, of acting out and not giving a damn rippled through his mind. He was twelve and, as he kept saying to himself, twelve-year-olds do NOT wear nappies or get put in them either. This hadn’t happened to any of his friends, so he was certain it wasn’t going to happen to him. But a chilling other thought entered his head – what if it happened to his mates all the time, except, he didn’t know about it?

‘THWACK’ that thought triggered a fear he didn’t know he had. A catalogue of harsh and terrible punishments filled his brain and made him shudder in indecision. How could he rebel or even argue if that kind of violence was delivered to his bare bottom. What if, once delivered it became a regular event? What if...?

However, he was sure if any of his mates had suffered from any embarrassing punishments he’d know about it. BUT, what if, they were so ashamed it was something no one ever talked about? Being strapped was something you could talk about but being forced to wear a nappy, well, that was just too weird and embarrassing. What if there were loads of kids, teenage kids, being made to wear some form of padding as an alternative to receiving a beating and it was simply something that no one ever spoke about?

It was as if some strange influence had got into his head and all he could mentally experience was the pain that people were inflicting on him. In his imagination it wasn’t just his parents, in fact they were not to be seen, but stranger after stranger piling in and walloping him for having done what he’d done.

Aarrggg, it was all too much. Robbie needed to get rid of these scary thoughts, but how?

~

His recent truculent nature was suddenly suffering from uncertainty and for the first time in quite some time Robbie was at a loss of what to do. He knew he should be making a scene, denying everything, call his parent’s names and swear the house down, except he didn’t, he was conflicted. The part that knew he’d done wrong, even if he wasn’t sure which ‘wrong’ they knew about - was edging over the part demanding he fight back. Basically, he was a good boy gone rogue, but now he was held to account, the roguish element was undeniably slipping away.

What if... yes, again, what if...?

The idea that there was a secret world of punishment going on where everyone involved was so ashamed of mentioning it - it had become THE way of dealing with disrespectful, out-of-control and threatening youths. Although this thought didn’t make much sense it was now imbedded in his brain and had somehow settled as an actual punishment that happened, and worse still, happen to him.

Psychologically he could see the swish of the belt through the air and the sickening ‘THWACK’ as it met its target. He could hear his screams; he could feel his pain - he definitely didn’t want that to happen to him. But would a nappy be better than the strap? Would it be more effective than actual physical punishment? He was sure no kid his age would admit to such a thing... thus ensuring the secret would remain just that... a secret.

He trembled at the thought, the revolt, was this something he’d be able to rebel against? His parents were ‘nice’ people, surely, they wouldn’t want to embarrass him but still, if they not only insisted but the penalties for not doing so were worse, would it then be the secret all threatened teens kept... including him?

SWISH, THWACK - “Ooooowwwww” His desperate cry of sudden and direct pain may have been bouncing about in his head, but the reality now seemed an option. He was nervously sweating - not just at this possibility but the ensuing probability.

~

Robert stood there thinking just what he had done and dad knew about that he could apologise for and escape this ridiculous childish sentence. For the first time ever he felt intimidated by his father. He was in comparison quite small for his age but until that moment had never thought about it. However, at that moment, he felt tiny and timid. He tried to continue to dry himself to delay whatever was about to happen. Try as he might he couldn’t think of anything, well anything he would openly confess to.

There was ‘cheeking’ Mrs Oldershaw. There was a chance he knew about bunking off the last couple of periods at school but thought that wasn’t much of a crime. His part in a bit of schoolboy bullying, which didn’t sit well with him but nonetheless he’d been there. Then of course it was possible that the incident in the shop in town might have reached dad’s ears. That was where he and his mates wandered in and whilst the cashier was kept busy, he and a chum helped themselves to various snacks and booze (and this hadn’t been the first time or the first shop to receive the gang’s attention). However, he’d never admit to that, unless they had CCTV and could prove it. When he thought about it there were quite a number of ‘little’ things that his father could be angry about but until he had a better idea perhaps wearing a nappy for a day or two might be the easiest way out of whatever trouble he was in. The main thing was, as long as they didn’t know about his serious ‘crime’, which he hoped to take to the grave, then all might just be forgotten.

He suddenly decided it was a no-brainer, if he was going to be punished harshly AND still end up wearing a nappy, then he might as well jump straight to that and avoid any painful attention.

“Okay,” seeing this as a possible way out he reluctantly agreed.

“Very sensible, now, let’s get these on you,” he held up the white fabric triangle, “and then the... hmmmm... on second thoughts... Claire... can you come in here please?”

“Yes dear,” his wife appeared at the bedroom door carrying what looked like a supply of new towels.

Robbie was confused as to why mum would be just hanging around his bedroom like that.

“Do I need to put extra padding in?” Dad looked a little confused at the extra items that were next to the fabric squares on the bed.

“Of course love, but don’t forget the barrier cream first, make it thick and sure it’s spread everywhere, we don’t want our Robbie to get a rash now do we?” She smiled benevolently at her son.

“Yes, well I had that covered...” her hubby said a bit annoyed because he hadn’t asked for that instruction.

Robbie lay there, towel in hand and all but naked wondering why they were arguing over this but of course they weren’t. This was more ‘theatre’ for his benefit. They were making sure he knew this was a huge deal that they were taking seriously. So, although he was being punished for his misdemeanours, they were still going to take good care of him.

Mum busied herself clearing out his underwear drawer, bagging up underpants, boxers and trunks and replacing those items with this fresh ‘laundry’. She then dug deep into another bag and pushed unopened packs of plastic pants in beside the pile of new fleecy terry nappies. Finally, she pulled nappy pins from her pocket and left them in a little dish next to the baby powder. Her boy was going to be well-cared for, the pins had white plastic ducky safety covers.

She then looked on in a supervisory capacity as hubby started the nappying process. Meanwhile, a nervous and confused Robbie turned beet red under scrutiny from both parents. It was scary that they seemed to think this was perfectly acceptable behaviour.

“You’ll need to use a booster pad and nappy liner before you pin it all together, it will make cleaning him up after any little accidents that much easier.” Claire added as she passed her hubby the items and a couple of safety pins.

“WHAT?” Robbie all but screamed and clamping a hand over his naked genitals.

“What, what?” his dad replied as he smacked his hand away, whilst inserting the things his wife had just suggested and pulling the multi-layered fabric up between the boy’s legs.

“I’m not going to shit in a nappy... I... errrrr....”

His dad gave him a second quick slap to his naked thigh “Language Robert, I’ll not tell you again.”

Although the slaps didn’t hurt there seemed to be a warning that had to be taken seriously. Was this just the start of a much more violent regime? It scared him to think that might be the case. However, the material felt really thick as it was pulled up and left him unsure if he’d be able to cope with such an item wrapped around his genitals.

Despite a half-hearted struggle dad pinned the thick, soft fabric tightly around his son’s wriggling waist.

“Dad please,” he begged, “I can’t be seen wearing a nappy I’m a grown...”

“Of course, you can sweetheart” Mum intervened as she saw the first tears begin to form in the corner of his eyes. “You’ll be wearing one from now on or until we see a huge improvement in your behaviour and an actual understanding of what you’ve been up to... and more especially... why we think this is necessary.” Her smile was benign but firm as she admired her hubby’s work. Her voice was soothing even if the message was chilling. Meanwhile, she flapped out a pair of smooth, clear plastic pants.

~

Mr and Mrs Davison had decided that their only son Robert (Robbie) was at an age where hormones and attitude kick in. They knew he was becoming, well, a teenager, but there’d been a very noticeable deterioration in his behaviour both at home and in school for almost a year. They knew he was part of a group that had been ‘disruptive’ in class and no doubt had been equally annoying at all other times. They suspected he’d been up to all manner of stupid, possibly illicit and undoubtedly antisocial activities... even if they didn’t know exactly what all of them were.

Twelve years old and at that age, when a firm hand can be easily swatted away, where a parent’s authority has begun to diminish greatly and a time where his friends and what they say (and incite) matter more than anything else, meant something needed to be done. It is most parents worry that their offspring might go down a road of wrong choices: criminal, anti-social or any manner of other unacceptable activities. Thomas and Claire Davison were determined that if they got in first, made him guilty about what he thought they might know, then they stood a chance of keeping their son as they wanted him.

“Keep him guessing,” that had been the idea, to not agree or disclose exactly what it was they knew. That way, and hoping they knew their son, he’d be on the defensive, anxious and, they hoped, so unsettled that he would comply, albeit reluctantly, to their decisions.

Up until relatively recently Robert had always been a good boy, not perfect, but good. However, reports from school, neighbours and homelife (attitude) had seen a complete turnabout that had made him become – unpleasant.  This was a side that Claire in particular didn’t want to see develop, so, with the agreement of hubby, set about coming up with something that would change him back to the likeable little scamp he used to be.

Of course, they ran the risk that whatever they said or did might rebound but thought, for the sake of their only son, they had to try. Although they’d planned their action, it was still an ad hoc situation as they didn’t know what reaction they’d get. They had no idea that the spontaneous threat of ‘something worse’ had already had such an effect so he was at present cowed and scared of speaking up too much. As their action continued Robert’s worry about this warning and what he had done became a bonus (although they were unaware of it), to keep him where they wanted him - nervous of terrible (but undisclosed) retribution.

Once the course of action was decided, they hoped that guilt, terror of discovery and an agenda where all choices were made for him (but in a caring, loving way) made his involvement unequivocal. Any time he questioned them about why they were doing this they simply put it back to him that he knew why and until he recognised and admitted his own complicity in this punishment then the penalty would continue.

This was infuriating for him because he had no idea exactly what it all meant apart from the fact, he would be wearing a nappy for a while.

How or why taking him back to wearing a nappy had come up in discussions neither was sure. Maybe Claire had read an article about kids not acting their age and this had been deemed a suitable punishment. However, even if she hadn’t read about such a reaction, she fondly remembered those happy nappy times when he was a toddler, that idea stuck so thought it worth a try. They also believed that by being supportive of his nappy wearing, just as they were when a child, and praising him each time he used it, they could convince him it was less of a punishment and simply a reminder.

~

Mastigophobia: irrational fear of punishment.

No one knew the word, no one knew where this sensible phobia had come from, but it had taken up residency in Robbie’s subconscious.

The nappy, though appalling for a lad his age, was at least bearable... well maybe.

~  tbc ~

Part 2

“STOP, STOP pleeeaaassseee just stop.” Robbie begged. “Mum, dad, tell me what I’ve done... I... I...”

It was a strange juxtaposition – their boy now firmly wrapped in a nappy and nothing else, trying to be grown up... visually at least didn’t work. 

“Oh sweetheart,” his mum took over feeding his kicking legs into the smooth see-thru plastic fabric. “These will contain everything so our little boy doesn’t make a mess anywhere he shouldn’t AND if he wants all this to end, he knows just what he needs to do.”

“I’m not a baby,” he said firmly but it lacked conviction, especially as the thick cotton fabric was now being engulfed by plastic pants. He wriggled, complained, swore but the bottom line was, he was afraid of what might happen. That limited his more aggressive nature (or one he adopted for his mates) and his mother accomplished the final snap of the waistband that held it all in place.

“There you go sweetheart,” his mum chuckled, whilst his father once again gave the ‘don’t mess with me’ look, “all nicely wrapped up and ready to greet the day.”

It was an instant transformation – one minute a lively pre-teen, the next, a timid, four and half feet worried looking pre-schooler.

Mastigophobia: that irrational fear of punishment wasn’t a word any of the family knew. However, there was little doubt that now it was the main mental image that was going to control a lot of what Robbie thought.

Of course he wasn’t immune to pain – playing football he’d been in many a rough tackle and rugby, well, he’d arrived home with several bashes and bruises and on occasions blood trickling from various wounds.

Those injuries didn’t worry him but he’d avoided unnecessary pain and his family had never subjected him to any form of physical punishment. The problem he had now, especially as it had taken over his imagination, was how easy the gang had spoken about the fights they’d had with brothers and sisters that ended in bruises and blood, or the times they were beaten black and blue by an overzealous parent with whatever means came to hand (punches, spankings, beatings, canes, straps - the list seemed endless as what had been used on these other twelve year olds). These often ‘proud’ descriptions had Robbie inwardly quaking with fear though tried his best to hide it. However, this inner weakness had led to ‘the stunt’ that now hung like a noose around his neck and the guilt of which lived in his head full time.

The thought, and certainly the punishment, he knew he was due for such an offence would be intense and saw its delivery only in the same way the gang received punishment – hard, physical and severe. He knew he wouldn’t be able to take that, especially the intensity that this ‘crime’ would surely produce.

In his head it amounted to a constant round of his naked bum receiving a fiercely wielded strap almost nonstop. He knew he wouldn’t survive such punishment so saw avoidance as the only answer.

Whilst he sulked his mum and dad busied themselves getting him ready - faffing around making sure everything was as it should be for their boy. The plastic pants had a glossiness and tightness that made the fabric underneath gleam. Claire had taken special care and researched her part well to ensure that everything would fit nicely and the robust but pliable clear plastic pants simply looked adorable on their almost teenage son. Their words and actions around him were loving, if a little childish; simple words for simple actions, as if they were talking to some adolescent unsure of himself. Now wrapped up in a nappy Robbie was indeed unsure where to go, what to say or what to do to be rid of it all.

There were tears in his eyes as well as a look of absolute despondency – this isn’t the way it’s supposed to be. For Robbie the recognition this is indeed how it was going to be began to hit home.

It had all happened so quickly; one minute he definitely wasn’t going to wear a nappy and the next… well… he was wearing one now. It felt strange… it was soft but…

“Mum, dad I’m sorry for, whatever it is I’ve done but please don’t make me wear all this, what will my friends say?” Now he was pleading and appealing to their sense of fair play.  

“Well love, you could tell them you’re being disciplined and then list the reasons. I’m afraid playing dumb no longer works. Your father and I, and to a certain extent many others,” she purposely sounded vague, “have put up with your nonsense for too long so now it’s up to you to change our minds.”

She paused for it to sink in and then added.

“Also, just so you know, if anyone does ask and you tell a lie, or pretend you aren’t wearing a nappy, then the penalty will increase. We simply will not put up with you lying to anybody anymore, so, think on!” 

She looked to see if her words had sunk in and saw his face grimace in confusion. However, he took some salvation from the fact he hadn’t lied about what he’d done, he’d just never mentioned it - thank God.

~

Robbie was desperate to argue, to complain, to admit to anything, if only they’d tell him what they knew about, but the rules seemed to be getting worse. It was so belittling and confusing but the more he thought about it the scarier it was becoming. He didn’t want to admit to anything, there was so much and certainly some things he never wanted to talk about. So, who knew where all this would end if he didn’t tow-the-line... and WHY a nappy?

On the spur of the moment Claire added something else for him to think about.

“For the moment this padding is just between the three of us.” She rubbed the substantial cushion. “I think it suits you and I know you’re going to... well... perhaps not love it but maybe appreciate why you’re having to wear it. However, as we say, if you tell lies if anyone asks, or you start getting lippy, then this secret will no longer be secure. So, anyone and everyone could get to know about your new underwear. Do I make myself clear?”

How much of what she said sunk in she didn’t know because he was sobbing pretty heavily. Despite that she insisted he acknowledged what he’d been told and through the tears begrudgingly nodded a response.

Perhaps strangest of all was that Claire and Thomas hadn’t yet thought of where this punishment might go or what they anticipated would be the final outcome. Now they had him wearing a nappy they just felt their only son needed that reminder he was still a child and their responsibility and simply needed to know that his behaviour had consequences - and this was one of them.

So, Thomas went to work at the building firm and Claire worked from home doing the occasional freelance work that added to the family finances. They weren’t a rich family, managing fairly well but not rolling in blissful monetary excess, although that could change soon but things weren’t certain. However, they put Robbie as a priority over everything else. So, what they were doing and as a result his new needs were seen as paramount if they wanted this to be a success.

~

Claire had convinced Thomas that this punishment needed to be taken and, because of the sickening reputation Robbie was amassing for himself (plus the headmaster’s report), he’d unequivocally agreed with his wife’s decision. She had all the supplies ready before any action was taken because quite simply, she wanted her little boy back and away from the corrupting hooligans he hung around with. They knew that just banning him from seeing them wouldn’t work, they needed to make it so he’d be reluctant to see them. An embarrassing amount of childish padding seemed a good way of doing just that.

Claire and Thomas had no idea the huge secret their son was keeping, all they were sure about was that he and his mates had been making mischief and not at a Halloween level. The reputation of the gang was the talk of the neighbourhood, so the fact that Robbie was regarded as part of the trouble meant, as far as they were concerned, something significant had to be done. They just wanted to get it sorted and now the long school summer holiday was underway this was what came to mind.  

She kept telling herself that by making him wear a nappy she could get him back. The plan had been to start as soon as he was no longer under the influence of his ‘gang’. So, from the first day of the Summer Break he was to be guilt-tripped into the new nappy regime. After that, they had a couple of weeks to get him used to his new underwear and accept them before the holiday she hoped would cement their tender control and trusted by then he’d be back to his loving ways. 

She’d convinced herself that the weight and structure of his padding would rein in his current excesses, make him constantly aware of his situation. When she saw just how adorable he looked with that cute little bulge and the smoothness of his plastic pants adding to the picture - something else clicked. In fact, the more she saw him looking so endearing (and vulnerable) the more she wanted to baby him. Although, to begin with that wasn’t the primary concern she couldn’t deny that now he looked the part of the sweet, innocent little lad like he used to be, why not have that youngster again?

Many new and interesting possibilities flittered through Claire’s mind as she pondered just what these might entail.

~

For most of the twelve years of his life his parents had encouraged Robbie to grow up and be himself. Near the cusp of becoming a teenager had made him more independent in thought and deed but, as he was finding out, some of the effects of that weren’t necessarily a good thing. The last twelve months or so, since he became part of the ‘gang’, had seen a horrible difference in his overall attitude. However, he was now made to realise that his autonomy was really just an illusion as he still relied on mum and dad to provide for him.

This obvious fact had never really occurred to him before – things like, money, food, clothing, a roof over his head, even holidays, those things had always been there and available and taken for granted. However, now they’d decided he should wear a nappy that’s exactly what he was dressed in. He had no idea how he could change this without losing so much of what they obviously provided?

He had thoughts of running away, but where to? Thoughts of hitting out but the worry of getting the strap meant that was a non-starter. He wasn’t a coward (although in truth far more delicate than he wanted to appear) though without the gang to coax him into doing the things he’d done; he certainly would never have done them under his own volition. Despite being in a gang, the idea of physical hurt and fighting had never appealed to him. He had thoughts of screaming the place down and creating a vile atmosphere. All the anger at that moment was useless because he felt himself begin to fill up emotionally. There was so much going on in his head and tugging at his conscience – fear, guilt, sorrow - it was difficult to take any real action on any of it. He had rapidly discovered that any independence had just been fantasy. He was, to all intents and purposes, impotent and unexpectedly realised just how much he did depend on mum and dad.

The knock to his self-esteem, coupled with these new feelings of emotional anxiety, were overpowering (mum and dad had delivered a direct hit with this psychological blow). The lad, who just moments ago had woken up a happy twelve-year-old was now wearing a nappy and feeling, as well as looking, like a toddler. He felt his grown-up status had been completely removed and, like a little kid, was helpless to change anything his parents decided.

From being strong and independent (or so he thought) he was now at their mercy. He didn’t like any of it but there was no denying that at that moment he was wearing a relatively thick white cotton nappy with rather childish ducky pins holding it all together, plus plastic pants and felt miserable.

As dad checked the new underwear fitted correctly, Robbie’s fretful mind desperately hoped for a reprieve. Despite being positive it would never happen, he now found himself wearing a nappy and, with each part of the fitting completed, discovered any resolve diminishing. He certainly didn’t want to feel that worrying strap and had convinced himself that was the only other alternative available to them.

THWACK! Yes, that thought of physical punishment was quite terrifying.

As if to add fuel to his already dejected state, tears were pouring down his face... and he couldn’t stop them.

~

Who could he tell? His mates would ridicule him and kick him out of the gang. Aunties and uncles would probably take his parent’s side, and doubted if any neighbours would take pity, he’d been quite obnoxious to many of them in recent months. No, he could only appeal to mum and dad, though it was like they weren’t prepared to succumb to any of his pleas.

“But I don’t know what I’ve done.” Robbie was in full meltdown, powerless and crying, begging and having a tantrum all at the same time. He wasn’t sure if he should confess to all his sins but what specifically was he being punished for? He had no idea and didn’t want to implicate himself (or any of his mates) in something they didn’t know about in case it made things worse. He was in a quandary because he knew that confessing would indeed only make it worse. With this - what, why, how, when? - his mind was full of worry and speculation. So, whilst mother patted the pillow of air from his plastic pants and levelled everything out she indicated for him to get dressed.

This was ridiculous. He was twelve and naked apart from a thick piece of fleecy material and pair of plastic pants. He stared at his reflection - the overall effect was weird because his new juvenile underwear fitted him so well. The plastic smoothed his fabric nappy and although it could be seen, especially the little ducky ends to the safety pins, it hugged him in a comforting manner. His reflection told the story – he was a padded toddler and was probably going to be treated as such. The plastic cover’s thick cuffs at the leg holes and waistband were soft but sturdy and as his mum ran her finger around them, he could feel just how supple the new material was as it slipped and gripped against his skin. He was confused but thought that it was all madness, and he wasn’t going to stand for it; the padding was coming off straight away.

It was as if his thoughts were being read.

“If you tamper with any of this, or it’s removed without our say so, well, you think you’re in big trouble now, you’ll soon see this is the least of what will happen.” Dad threatened once again, and this brought an absolute torrent of tears and a spurt of anxiety-induced pee into the newly applied nappy.

He had to avoid any form of pain for his own preservation. In his mind he was convinced that he wouldn’t be able to withstand any prolonged beating with ‘the strap’ and he’d confess to everything (even his most secret of secrets) if subjected to such intense discipline.

‘THWACK! THWACK! THWACK!’

The possibility looked even closer than before but he had to keep that secret.

~

Robbie was in a dilemma, the fear of the possible physical hurt, set against the actual emotional reality, was producing a strange mix of concerns and indecision. Reluctantly he was now wearing a nappy and although as upsetting as the experience was, it certainly wasn’t as bad as getting a cruel beating. However, it was also not something any twelve-year-old would want to admit to. His parents had been pretty sure this was what was going to happen and so it had proved. His absolute determination for it not to happen hadn’t worked and he felt totally helpless.

Claire and Thomas were adamant that having their son wear a nappy would make him realise that he was still only a child. The constant hug of his padding (the result of which was the adoption of a cute little waddle) would, they hoped, make him acknowledge this simple fact.

There was absolutely no doubt that Claire had thought about this for a lot longer than her husband because she had chosen the items carefully and they fit perfectly. She couldn’t have been happier. Seeing her pre-teen son in a lovely white fleecy nappy, just seemed right and for some reason yearned he’d feel the same way.  

Even so, the pre-teen’s tears were real and although it pained both parents to see him in such a state, they were striving for a specific outcome. So, a few tears, whether self-serving or otherwise, had to be met with love but an understanding that they were in charge. After all, the hard bit was over, they had got their wayward son back into a nappy, so now it was just sheer willpower on their part to keep him that way.

~

Robbie was conflicted, which left him wondering where he stood. His parents had laid down the law as to what he would be wearing from then on and this had all happened despite him being resolute it never would. The shock to his system and self-image left him uncertain yet all he could feel was the thick padding that now wrapped itself around his hips. So, no matter how upset or strange the situation was, this was the way it was going to be - he shuddered at the prospect - how was he going to cope with this new weird and embarrassing weighty underwear?

Although this was an awful situation and he wasn’t thinking straight, he tried to reason it as just a temporary form of discipline and that, after a couple of days, it would be over, and things could return to normal. The thick cushion between his legs was strange, if not totally weird, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. Thinking in these terms meant he could at least feel a little better about his circumstances but still… it was incredibly humiliating.

Claire ran her hand through her son’s hair. “Sweetheart, get some clothes on as breakfast will be on the table in few minutes.”

“I’m not hungry,” he mumbled and threw himself down onto his bed sobbing into the pillow yet trying to hide the tears. His smooth, shiny, bulky, plastic bum was shaking with uncontrollable emotion, which only made him appear more vulnerable and childish. Perhaps oddly, although the view was what they had hoped for, both mum and dad felt sorry for him.

Still, dad needed to assert his authority, “This isn’t a polite request... MOVE... you don’t get to make any decisions.” He was not going to put up with a sulky or belligerent child. “The sooner you get your act together and realise who is in charge, the better.”

As he lay there bitter but impotent, the poor lad resented his circumstances and didn’t want to comply but there was something in his father’s posture and tone that he’d never noted before – a severity that wasn’t going to be toyed with. It was intimidation he’d previously never experienced and it was quite unnerving. 

‘THWACK! THWACK! THWACK!’ was all he could imagine and that brought another burst of teary emotion.

However, as their son’s head was buried in a pillow both couldn’t help but smile an acknowledgement to each other because Robbie was suitably nappied. His slim frame, near hairless body and soft features made it so the fabric hugged him well, and perhaps oddly for a boy his age, didn’t seem inappropriate. The material was thick enough to give his bottom the babyish padded curve that looked so delightful, whilst the soft rustle of the plastic pants as his body heaved trying to contain his feelings added to their conviction that this, under the circumstances, was the correct move.

Claire took out her phone and silently clicked away at the scene, she hoped it would be the first of many shots, as she documented their attempt to pull their son back from, as they saw it, the precipice.  

They didn’t want to hurt their son with physical punishment (indeed it had been a psychological threat but no more), and although some might say that mental cruelty was worse, they didn’t agree with that assessment - challenging anyone to make the decision – a vicious spanking or wearing a nappy? Their son looked the part of a sweet boy who needed, and was getting, a new perspective to his life from doting but determined parents.

~

Improbably, the sheer number of tears and pent-up emotion had had an effect. The outpouring had made Robbie feel helpless and had taken him back to a time when crying produced instant love and attention from both parents. They always tried to comfort him with hugs, kisses and sweet-talk and now, despite himself, he felt like a little kid and wanted that support.

The fact that he was getting that attention in spades added yet another dimension to his unease. As his parents eventually left him to think about his circumstances - the weight of the nappy, the smoothness and subtle noise of his plastic pants as he moved brought home just what he’d become. It was still quite a shock to see himself dressed in such a way, but it was done now, so fighting it and getting the situation changed was going to be a lot trickier. However, now he’d calmed down slightly he wasn’t stupid enough to disobey his father on this occasion; he’d done that so often recently.

Ahh! and then a ‘ping’ went off in Robbie’s head, maybe that’s why he was being punished - for not doing as he was told, answering back and generally being uncooperative. If this is what had happened to get him into this state, he thought, perhaps now would be a daft time to test that theory. After all, although a terrible situation to be in, he was convinced this was only going to be a fleeting state-of-affairs, so, least said, soonest mended.

~

There was no doubt that those last few (life-changing) minutes had had a potent and upsetting impact on the lad. He was puzzled and without his mates to encourage him felt quite out of his depth. His initial thoughts had been to laugh off the very idea that mum and dad were playing a ‘prank.’ However, now he was actually wearing a nappy, and the determination and threat of ‘worse’ if he didn’t comply, had turned his youthful (and disrespectful) attitude upside down. He wasn’t as sure as he had been about just how much power or influence he had in the household. He was reliant on them for everything, and, as he ran his palms uneasily over the smooth padding he was now being required to wear, his previous teenage self-confidence seemed to evaporate.

The fact that he’d just leaked into his nappy was also a bit alarming, as if they knew he’d need one, but how? This was the stupidest of punishments as it made more work for all concerned but, he processed, it would only be his bulky nappy that anyone would notice. That was the main worry - the number of people who’d remark about it. What excuse could he come up with? Would his parents keep the secret as mentioned or just tell everyone that’s what he now wore because of some reason only they knew about? Again, anxiety filled his head and more unintentional pee dribbled into his nappy so began to feel like a stupid tot with no control. How had this happened and what could he do to change it?

First off, he needed to hide the absurd fact that he’d just soaked his padding.

~

Although this underwear was very disconcerting, he saw, for the moment at least, he had very little option. The threat of something worse, and the fact that he wasn’t sure just what it was that he was being punished for, filled him with apprehension. All those cartoon images in comics of kids getting a spanking or the cane in some old schoolboy stories suddenly were no longer amusing. In his head he could visualise the painful effects of a strap landing on his bare arse, even if he’d never experienced it or seen anyone receive such a penalty. That powerful and terrifying image was there in his mind and enough to keep him under his parent’s sway.

THWACK!

Reluctantly he knew he had to get ready, any further attempts at defiance might lead to, well, who knew where? He tried on several different pairs of pants but couldn’t fasten the zips or buttons on the ones he liked because of the padding’s thickness. All his pants and jeans were relatively tight, a boy his age needed to look good and baggy pants were something only the uncool would wear. So, despite his frustration, in the end settled on a pair of loose blue linen shorts he was going to wear on holiday in a couple of weeks’ time.

Oh hell, he had a sudden worry, would the planned holiday to Portugal in a couple of weeks now be cancelled because of all this? He hoped not as he’d been telling all his mates about the fabulous villa they were going to be staying in... he’d look stupid and a liar.

He’d been looking forward to the holiday because of all the spectacular hot looking girls he expected there’d be on the beach. He was at the age where he knew the possibilities of a girlfriend were desirable and wasn’t averse to thinking of them before he went to sleep. However, his new situation made him reassess his attitude towards his parents and, hoped if he maintained a pleasant disposition, things would soon get back to normal. What had changed, apart from the nappy, was that every time he thought about removing it his mind immediately thought about that strap. He couldn’t shake the idea that his parents might resort to that as the ‘other’ alternative, even if they had never actually mentioned it.

Instead of the usual lurid and disturbing t-shirt he preferred to wear, he slipped on a more conservative pale blue polo shirt with white sneakers and aimed to get to the breakfast table inside the allotted time. There was also the hope that the sooner he followed his parent’s directions, the sooner this whole stupid performance would be over.

~

“My, my sweetheart, you do look nice.” His mother greeted his eventual appearance. This was a bonus because the clothes he seemed to prefer always looked to carry some kind of threat. “I’ve done you some extra bacon so start; dad will join us shortly.”

It was as if nothing had happened. How could she pretend everything was normal, he was wearing thick padding under his shorts? Well, if that’s the way they were going to be he had to play their game.

That was it, pretend this was just a game. He could get through this stupid nonsense if he could set his mind to that fact. That should be easy-peasy.

“Thanks mum,” Despite his relatively thick padding Robbie was keen to keep this appearance of acceptance going for as long as he could. He had sensed from what his father had implied that being all moody and disagreeable wasn’t going to work so hoped this other, more compliant way, would be effective. “This looks lovely.”

His mother beamed with pride, although noticed at the same time the padding under his loose shorts wasn’t too identifiable although she enjoyed the soft rustle, which to her at least was an indication that nappy and plastic pants were where they should be. She saw the little waddle he’d had to adopt to accommodate the nappy’s thickness and couldn’t help but chuckle to herself because as he sat down the air rushed out from his wadding giving off a little whoosh.

She made a mental note to capture all that on camera at some point and loved his reaction.

He heard it as well and grimaced, making a mental note not to flop down anywhere whilst wearing plastic pants.

Dad came in a few moments later and settled at the table and smiled encouragingly at his son.

“Good start Robbie, good start,” and gave a seriously approving nod.

After a few minutes of eating in relative silence Robbie started an apology of sorts.

“Erm, look, erm, mum, dad, I’m sorry if I’ve been disrespectful recently and causing you to worry. You needn’t but, well... I’m sorry if my behaviour has upset you in any way.”

His mother smiled, “Well that’s nice of you Robbie and we appreciate what you’ve just said.”

Seizing what he thought was a moment of forgiveness he pursued it hopefully. “Please can I get out of this nappy... please?”

“Sorry son,” his father added, “We’re grateful for your apology and the fact that you recognise your failings but we know that those things you’ve just expressed regret about are but the tip of the iceberg. So, the nappy stays.” His father was firm but balanced; there was no harsh words just a statement of fact.

Robbie knew his dad was correct but had hoped that it might have worked. After a brief silent period of assessing the situation, he then got down to what was really worrying him.

“Are we still going on holiday?” he wondered doubtfully.

“Of course, sweetheart,” said his mother smiling encouragingly, “why would we not?” Her expression changed thinking something might be wrong “Oh, don’t you want to go anymore?”

“No mum no, I mean I’m really looking forward to it but, well, I just wondered because of... erm... this.” He rubbed the front of his shorts indicating the large, contoured bulge, which with him sitting down had become emphasised.

His mother laughed. “Oh sweetheart, you don’t think your dad and I would go without you, do you? We’re looking forward to the break as much as you and we’re told that there’s plenty to see and do so the place will be busy and fun.”

“Great,” Robbie enthused more than a little relieved, “looking forward to it myself.” At the back of his mind, he was dying to ask how long he would have to wear this ridiculous outfit but thought best not to bring it to their attention. He might not like the answer.

“But of course,” his father said with a look that wasn’t quite as friendly, “it all depends on you keeping the nappy on and not causing your mother or I any further... erm... concern.”

The positivity Robbie had briefly held disappeared with those words and he knew he’d have to put up with wearing his extra thick padding if he wanted to go on holiday.

“Yes dad,” he answered gloomily.

~

Later, and it took Robbie by surprise, his mother pulled down his shorts and checked to see if he was wet. He looked daggers at her, but she just ignored him.

“Oh, darling you’re soaked,” she said sympathetically. “You must tell either of us when you’re wet... it’s not good to walk around in a soggy nappy.”

Angry at the invasion of his privacy and feeling that it was their wrongdoing anyway he shot back, “Well if I didn’t have to wear the damn things I could go to the loo... this is all your fault.” He wasn’t going to admit that he’d inadvertently peed in his nappy.

“Now, now sweetheart,” she soothed, “you know why you’re wearing such an item so let’s not pretend otherwise, hmmmm?” She didn’t want this to turn into a shouting match and as long as she and Thomas remained a calming influence, she was convinced Robbie would also remain compliant.

“No, I don’t...” he spat back.

She wasn’t going to rise to this touch of petulance and merely smiled and shook her head as if reprimanding a demanding toddler.

“Oh yes, I think you do... anyway.... it’s a moot point because this is what you’ll be wearing from now on, so, you’ll just have to get used to it.” She finished dismissively.

Despite his initial anger… “THWACK” a mental image of a strap walloping his backside filled his head and though he wanted to throw the biggest tantrum any twelve-year-old could muster, that psychological image pulled him up... and that wouldn’t be the only time. Oddly, he still felt guilty because he knew he wouldn’t be punished unless he had done something AND he’d done plenty of things he hoped they didn’t know about. So, swallowed his anger as she guided him back to his room for a clean-up and fresh nappy.

Because he’d soaked his nappy he’d become a little less confident about ‘the game’ he pretended he was playing. It didn’t feel right that his mother was about to change him but couldn’t come up with a way out. His anxiety increased, his confidence sunk below the horizon and he felt uneasy as he toddled up to his room. Followed by his mother who was surreptitiously videoing it on her mobile phone. His swaying padded bum making for a very cute image.

~

Claire was incredibly pleased that he was using his padding, that had been the second step after getting him into it, but knew he resented the fact he had to. What she didn’t know was that his wet nappy occurred quite by accident and unannounced. He’d been as surprised as she was now that it was soaked.

Robbie felt guilty that mum had identified that his nappy was wet, it was as if he was supplying the ammunition to shoot himself with. She, on the other hand, just seemed to accept it as the natural course of events and didn’t see it as a victory, merely something that needed sorting.

In fact, Claire was beside herself with delight. She had been wondering how she could insist he use it but now it seemed he was using it on his own. Perhaps he was already accepting the new nappy routine and realised it was what he needed to do.

Once the nappy was off and she’d wiped the damp area he announced that whilst it was off, he should go to the loo.

“Mum, I need to go for a sh.... erm... I need a poo.”

“Oh love, you should have gone in your nappy before the change. I tell you what, I’ll put it back on and you can do it then.”

Robbie was shocked. Even though he’d been told he’d have to use his nappy he thought it simply wouldn’t happen. Despite his protests she fastened him back up and pulled his plastic pants over the damp fabric.

“There sweetheart, you can go now.”

“Mum, that’s ridiculous, the toilet is only there,” he pointed across the landing, “why are you making me use a nappy.”

“Well, it’s all part of putting you back in them love. We expect you to use them for what they were designed for... and that means... everything.”

“Mum, I’m not a baby so stop treating me like one.” He was angry with her but even so knew that repercussions might be worse so slightly drew back from a full scale strop. “I’m not going to shi...” he added with timid certainty, but Claire just looked at him and said,

“In your own time love, in your own time.”  

He felt even more of his self-esteem slipping away - this wasn’t part of ‘the game’ surely?

He sighed, determined he wouldn’t do that.

~ tbc ~

 

 

Part 3

That’s twelve days ago and, despite all his protestations, he’s still wearing a thick fabric nappy. Early on he tried a few times to lose them, and, on each occasion, he’d been found out. His parents expressed their disappointment but then gave him the opportunity of being re-nappied or experiencing an even worse (but undisclosed) punishment. By then he was so scared of what that might entail he reluctantly let himself be folded into what has become his customary thick fleecy padding.

However, he had disobeyed them so there were to be consequences. At the time he didn’t quite realise what that meant but now - he couldn’t go anywhere without an adult; TV programmes were monitored so was only able to watch Children’s TV without supervision and bedtime was brought forward by half an hour each time he’d tried to scramble out of his nappy.

Although the initial idea hadn’t been to reduce him to act like a toddler the more he protested and squirmed in his padding, the more it all seemed appropriate to deal with him in that way. They’d let him grow up choosing his own path but that had led in the wrong direction, so the pull back, the reining in of his possible self-destructive side, was now down to them. Psychologically, the fact that he was wearing a nappy made it easier for them to treat him as a little boy in need of such instruction. What’s more, with him having restrictions both physical and mental, what they were doing appeared to be getting results.

Even after the first day he’d thought it would be over quickly. He couldn’t understand why his parents would want their son to wear something so childish. He felt silly and vulnerable and dreaded anyone knowing anything about it, and yet they seemed perfectly fine with it all. So, when he was put into another nappy, and then another... he was upset but the fit of temper he wanted to unleash was kept firmly in check. Quite simply, now he was wearing a nappy, he found it difficult to fight back against his mum and dad’s fervour.

There had been times when he’d checked his drawers to see if his ‘proper’ underwear had returned, only to be saddened at the number of nappies piled there. It didn’t look like this punishment was going to end soon judging by that amount of fleecy cotton. Also, because of the times he’d not told them he was wet, they insisted that, when at home, no shorts. He was furious at that rule but, like everything else, it came to pass.

Something else that had crept up on him unaware was that his room now had a faint smell of urine but quite a heavy atmosphere of liniment and baby powder. It was something that, like everything else about this project, brought memories, happy memories, flooding back to mum who was in her element dealing with it all.

~

With each ‘pull back’ by his parents, and the added reaction that had on his entire mental capabilities, he was feeling tense, nervous and had difficulty concentrating, whilst feeling detached from what was happening. At times it felt like it was all happening to someone else and when he felt that way his nappy was perplexingly a comfort, whilst at other times just an irritation.

At bedtime his padding was made thicker with booster pads and tougher plastic pants, which in truth his mother thought made him look just too sweet for words. (The photographs she took at such times both when he was awake and asleep bore testimony to this fact). There were times when the plastic cover just held the nappy cushion to perfection and made him look every inch a sweet little toddler. There was no hiding the fact that, with each change (and application of cream and powder), mum was enjoying seeing her boy wearing such an item and loved to see each of his ‘special covers’ mould itself around the padding and produce what she thought was the ideal way Robbie should wear his nappy – glossy and firm.

What was even odder was there were also times when she spoke to him as a child and he didn’t react badly or shrug with disdain. Despite claiming not wanting to be treated as a baby her constant reassurance he was a ‘good boy’ was having an effect. He seemed to actually enjoy being complimented and comforted - mum especially always keen to deliver a supportive hug. This was strange because no matter how many times he told himself this shouldn’t be happening, the hugs immediately made things seem better.

In the days since she’d put him back into a nappy she’d persuaded herself that because she thought this a good idea AND for his own good, he’d eventually appreciate that fact for himself. As if by some magical spell, even if he didn’t confess his multiple sins, he would acknowledge what was happening and know it was all in his best interest.

She was unyielding in her belief that this was for the good (and possible redemption) of their wayward boy. He’d been irresponsible and wanted her good boy back. She repeatedly told herself that by making him wear a nappy, he would understand he was still only a child and under their protection. They knew what was best for him and, quite simply, he looked so adorable wearing one.

At each change mum and dad were positive and encouraged him to be happy in HIS nappy. They kept emphasising that it was HIS and that it was because of what he’d done that he was wearing one. They doggedly pursued the notion that if they insisted his nappy wearing was all down to him then he would find it more difficult to blame others.

In next to no time, and quite unexpectedly, Claire and Thomas had eroded his independence and made him totally dependent on what they decided. The mouthy pre-teen was, to their surprise, quickly subdued and learned that his way of life depended on wearing his nappy. He may not have been happy-in-a-nappy but what he perceived to be the alternative meant he had little choice.

The thing was, so embedded in his thoughts was the brutal ‘THWACK!’ of the strap on his unprotected bum, that mental image alone made him recoil from pushing too hard at the new boundaries - that, together with the fact he still had no idea what exactly he needed to apologise for. Well, actually he did and the unforgivable shame about what he’d done was quite overwhelming so he certainly wasn’t going to confess to THAT.

~

Meanwhile he tried apologising “for everything” but his parents asked him to be specific. He struggled by admitting to some of his lesser crimes, but his parents just smiled and asked him to think again. This of course incensed him, which made him feel angry and argumentative, but to no avail. The restrictions for where he could go and what he could do were quite severe but he didn’t have the conviction or proficiency to combat them. So the nappy stayed and because of that he didn’t want to go anywhere or see anyone.

The reality that they’d got him into nappies a lot easier than anticipated increased their desire to make sure he didn’t get out of them again anytime soon. Seeing their son totter around the house wearing such nice thick protection, and him being aware of that fact AND that it was down to ‘something he’d done’, oddly made for a lot less stressed household. His father’s firmness and mother’s equal, but more understanding, approach had befuddled him enough so as not to be sure where he stood. Every time he disputed the need for a nappy as punishment, his reluctance to admit to why he was now wearing one was used against him.

“We don’t have to explain anything young man... but keep arguing and see where that gets you. Remember, you brought this on yourself!”

This nebulous contention left him mystified and angry but had nothing to fight back with. He couldn’t confess, that would be just too much. He also thought, no he knew, if what he’d done ever got out then his parents would disown him completely. It wasn’t worth even thinking about, the repercussions were too dire to contemplate... he had enough to worry about as it was.

As a result, because of his quarrelling, bedtime, with extra thick fabric padding and heavy protective plastic pants, had at one point been 7pm, which for a lad his age was ridiculously early. So, although he wriggled out of them to begin with, pretty soon learned that wasn’t going to happen without significant cost, especially when they quickly returned him to the now permanent cushion of a fleecy nappy, which of course was accompanied by the sweet telltale rustle of plastic pants.

Being put to bed, not sent, they made sure he was tucked up nicely and kissed ‘night-night’ so he knew they meant business. They also added the proviso that he wasn’t to get up for any reason and if he did - how did he fancy a six o’clock bedtime?

To get to this point there had been several complete family eruptions but all were dealt with by mother’s sympathy and understanding coupled with father’s refusal to change his mind. In fact, Robbie had never known his parents be so difficult to influence. In the past he’d always been able to get his way playing one parent off against the other. Well, so he thought, but of course that wasn’t quite what was happening.

His parents had always thought they’d brought him up to be responsible but now they’d seen that error, no matter how temporary or otherwise, of a free rein. They were determined to stop that decent and had decided on this, perhaps controversial, way to alter the circumstances.

“We said you’ll wear a nappy all the time and that’s just what we meant,” his mother said with a severity Robbie just wasn’t used to. He shivered at her determination as his own hope that he still had any say in the matter diminished. “We don’t want to baby you but you are still a child and under our care and it appears you need a constant reminder of that fact... and what is more... you know exactly why.”

His body radiated a hot guilty flush, his padding seemed to get heavier, and the tell-tale rush of nervous pee into it only confirmed why he now wore a nappy.

“Try and remove them again and see what happens,” his father added with touch of malice but of course always added a smile, which could have been interpreted in two ways.

THWACK! – the heavy mental guilt trip made him comply.

That final threat left Robbie all but feeling what that might be, though grasped it was something he didn’t want to experience.

~

He’d resented early bedtimes but, with the prospect of it being moved to 6:00pm, he gave in, much to his mother’s relief; she didn’t want to fight him she wanted his acceptance of the situation. She took great delight in getting her boy ready and into his thick nighttime nappy. His usual sleepwear of boxers and t-shirt had been replaced by a nice, but very thick, fleecy nappy with extra padding (to help take care of his morning mess) and a t-shirt that was supersoft, which was in a plain pastel colour. So, despite his protests, wriggling and total un-cooperation her determination (and control) was definite about what he would be wearing from that moment on. She made sure that every little interaction, whether good or bad, ended with her pulling him in for a hug. It may not have been what he wanted but confusingly there was no denying a comforting warmth spread through his body (though not necessarily his nappy) whenever it happened.

Because of all this, at each change the memory of his babyhood would surface when she’d slipped in a dummy or fed him a bottle of warm milk, such a happy and fulfilling time for her (why couldn’t things be like that again she’d fantasise?). However, that wasn’t the outcome they were searching for. This wasn’t an attempt to baby him (but more and more it did appear to be heading that way by its own volition), it was to make Robbie realise the penalties for his unchecked actions and the culpability he shared in this outcome. Once he’d stopped fighting them on that particular front, he was able to gain a later bedtime and some restricted playtime on his console but that was reliant on his behaviour.

Nevertheless, each change of nappy didn’t stop his mother, emotionally at least, reliving those times when he was such a cute and loving little tot. Rubbing in anti-rash cream and sprinkling his naked little genitals with talcum powder, were all such a heady image. She’d covertly capture such moments on her mobile when he wasn’t looking and often when he was asleep – he was one loveable nappied teen when lying there dreaming about who knows what. It was no burden for Claire to be responsible for his nappy changes... wet and messy... she didn’t mind.

That was the other thing, he wasn’t allowed to change himself, not that he wanted that job, but his parents insisted that only they were allowed to change his nappies. It made it more personal; they could also keep a check on him and of course it made him totally reliant on them for dry padding. His night time nappy was thicker to cope with everything he was expected to have deposited in it come morning.

Claire made sure that his huge, glossy plastic padded bum was the last thing she saw each night as he climbed under the covers. To her the smooth shiny bulk was the epitome of innocence and also a not-so-subtle reminder that he looked very much a pre, pre-teen.

“If only...” she’d think. Which would lead to thoughts of him nursing on a warm bottle of milk or happily sucking on a dummy like he had when a toddler. She’d try and ignore these mental images but they were quite strong and very, very pleasing. Sometimes he was grumpy and ‘not in the mood’ for a hug but that didn’t worry her as she’d kiss him affectionately on his forehead and whisper “Goodnight sweetie”. The gentle rustle of his plastic pants against the bed linen as he got himself comfy a delight to her ears.

He complained about the mass being too weighty, the plastic pants made him hot and sweaty, which made his nappy damp even when he hadn’t peed in it. However, the truth was that his mother had fitted them perfectly. She’d made it so that his nighttime protection was much thicker with extra padding to soak up any extra ‘flow’ and that his clear or white plastic pants were also much larger and more robust to cover the extra material. She discerned what would work and what wouldn’t and knew that the smooth rounded shape, both front and back, would not only let him know he was well-protected but that a boy, her boy, would be very secure. Of course, he wouldn’t admit to this startling fact but his nappy was indeed annoyingly snug... and begrudgingly there were times when her praise and love was very, very welcome. At his age it was those things he’d been trying to escape from, however, when it came down to it, and it’s constant availability, it was something he quite liked.

She was completely in her motherly element as each night she patted and stroked his slinky large plastic bottom when he crawled under the bed covers. The cushiony package filling her nightly with happy mummy-hormones and even happier memories.

“Night-night sweetheart... we love you Robbie... never forget that.” She caressed his hair and kissed his forehead. His bed times might have got a little later than when he was being confrontational but they still weren’t overly late.

So, even though he was full of resentment and hated the large bulky item fixed around his groin that had that soft swishing sound as he moved, his mother’s words were always positive and loving and it was hard to stay cranky under such circumstances. She’d got him into a loving routine which happily meant all his arguments were forgotten as he fell into a blissful night’s sleep.

~

However, the first time he’d had to crap in his nappy had been the most difficult. On that first day he really wasn’t sure. He’d decided to ‘just get it over with’ so was trying to cope as best he could but also he was twelve and thought there was no way he should be wearing a nappy never mind having to use it. After mum had reapplied his wet one and told him to use it - that was a shock. He’d held off as long as he could and eventually begged his father to let him use the toilet like he had for the past eight years. Dad was resolute that he used his nappy as prescribed and insisted that the boy should just relax and not worry about it.

This made no sense to Robbie who was sure it was being done just to humiliate him further. His absolute refusal to shit himself was skewered by the fact that the holiday was fast approaching. His parents had made clear that all future events depended on him carrying out their demands and that meant staying in his padding and using it. So, no matter what he wanted, this was the state of play. However, he had no intention of missing out on the holiday and was still of the opinion that, if not before, when that day arrived then his punishment would cease, and everything would return to normal.

Although no nearer acknowledging why he was being punished in such a way, he still felt guilty (very guilty). There was no doubt that with the intensity of his parent’s chastisement he must have crossed a line somewhere, even if he didn’t know how or when. It was all very frustrating and perplexing but didn’t know what he could do to change things. Everything he’d so far tried had ended with a smile and a push back – “You know why you’re wearing a nappy sweetheart”.  

To do what he was being told to do was the ultimate betrayal of what growing up was all about. How could he forget all the years of going to the toilet easily? It was difficult and of course the reluctance was causing him great pain. His stomach growled as he tried to keep from releasing his smelly load but still dad wouldn’t let him visit the toilet, he had to use the nappy.

“Please dad... please let me just go...”

“Come here son,” Thomas beckoned him over and hugged the crying boy to his chest and rubbed his back and patted his thick padding. “Just relax and let go.”

“I can’t dad honestly I’ve tried,” his sobbing son appealed.

“Sshhhhh, don’t cry...” he patted and rubbed his son’s cushioned bum, “We don’t want you to be ill and all that’s in you is going to come out eventually so... let it.” He whispered in the boy’s ear. “Just relax son, just relax and let it happen... I’m here for you but it’s something you need to do...”

Tears of incomprehension and total irrationality spun in his head. It didn’t make any sense as to why he needed to perform such a dirty and backward action. It wasn’t right...

“But why dad... why?” The sobbingly increased.

“Because son from now on that’s how it’s going to be. So, the sooner you do it the sooner we can all move on.”

The words were supportive but Thomas wondered if this was really necessary. Claire had said that Robbie needed to know he was wearing a nappy and thought just wearing one wouldn’t quite get the message home. However, a wet and messy nappy made sure he realised that he was being punished.

“But dad...”

Unfortunately, as his father rubbed his back to console him his resolve ended abruptly with a huge involuntary fart and the back of his nappy began to fill.

A loud cry of anguish came from Robbie as he had no alternative but to release the entire load once it started. His body shook as his father held him tightly and offered words of reassurance.

“There, there son, that’s better... get it all out and then later we can get you all changed into a fresh one for the rest of the day.”

Robbie was crying hard, mortified about what was happening. He couldn’t escape his father’s hug and, in a strange way, being held by his understanding dad was somehow comforting. However, he didn’t take in what had been said as lump after lump of mess pushed into the seat of his already well-soaked nappy.

Robbie couldn’t get over what was happening. Surely this couldn’t be what anyone wanted but still his nappy grew messier as the mush continued to fill it. This was the most horrendous thing that had ever happened to him and it wasn’t his fault. His mum and dad had made him do this and yet, as the pain in his stomach lessened, he was grateful for it to be out, though hated where it had ended up. Tears of humiliation, frustration and incomprehension were streaming down his face

“Good boy, I’m sure you feel better now. It’s all part of a process... well done.” The plastic pants had expanded but held the contents as his dad stroked the warm bulk that now settled in the seat of his son’s browning terry nappy. Once he was sure he’d finished Thomas patted him reassuringly one more time and left him so he could come to terms with it all.

Robbie really didn’t know what to do next; the shame and disgust at what had happened left him paralysed. A lad his age not only having to wear a nappy but messing in it as well hammered away at his once proud self-image. He was reduced to nothing but a toddler, which the tears coursing down his face only went to support.

He was totally chastened.

The bewildered lad was stunned that he wasn’t immediately changed but his reactions were very strong – shock and revulsion. He was surprised at the weight that dragged at his rear. In fact, it was his tight plastic pants that were holding the entire thing up and, for the moment at least, contained the smell.

A few minutes later and still standing in his room, the smell became apparent so, despite loathing each little movement, went in search of mum hoping she’d change him. However, he caught sight of himself in the mirror as he slowly waddled and was nauseated. He could see through the clear plastic pants just how discoloured his nappy had become, how streaked with tears his face was and how totally miserable and juvenile he looked… and it terrified him. He’d become the very thing he was afraid of becoming, a baby.

“Ah sweetheart, yes of course I’ll change you but, I’m busy at the moment. Why don’t you go and play in the garden, and I’ll sort you out as soon as I finish what I’m doing.”

“Play in the garden?” I’m not a kid thought Robbie. However, his full and increasingly saggy nappy indicated otherwise.  

Reluctantly (and carefully) he waddled outside, if for no other reason it diluted the smell around him but couldn’t do anything. He dreaded sitting down or mushing the mess against his skin so stood patiently but totally sickened waiting for her to come and sort him out.

Whilst waiting he had time to take in the ludicrous situation he found himself. He was angry, frightened, sad and a whole bunch of other emotions were bubbling around in his head. What were his parents playing at? What could he do to change things? But worst of all, was he destined to spend the rest of this inexplicable punishment wearing messy nappies?

Again, he tried to pinpoint in his mind just what it was his parents knew that had produced this weird and retrograde step in his advance to becoming a teenager. He was in turmoil; wouldn’t it just be easier to admit to his ‘crime’ and have done but that confession was just too much to contemplate.

Then he had a panic attack – what if any of his mates came around now and witnessed his shame? He was twelve he shouldn’t be wearing a nappy and definitely not shit in one but as he thought this, he also remembered that he’d said neither of these things would happen and yet they had.

He hadn’t realised just how much his body was shivering. It wasn’t cold, far from it, but his body seemed to be reacting to the situation on its own. He felt vulnerable, that was it, vulnerable and scared and every bit the small child who needed mum or dad to sort things out for him. This was all too much; the emotional strain had been stretched to snapping point... and it had just snapped.

Another huge sob wracked his body – why, why, WHY were they making him wear a nappy and worse still use it? What the hell had he done (that they knew about) that made this a punishment that fit any crime? Even the slightest movement reminded him of the grainy sludge he was carrying around. He hoped that now he’d done it he wouldn’t have to anymore. Alas he was wrong.

Twenty-five minutes later mum came out with a changing mat and a bunch of other items and laid them out on the sunny lawn and called him over. Cheerfully, and there out in the fresh air, she was going to give him his first messy nappy change since he was three; the first of many she anticipated whilst getting her boy back. Back from what and where was between him and her. He couldn’t understand why she was so pleased he’d just shit himself yet she was full of praise and patted his filled nappy with enthusiasm.

“You’re doing very well Robbie.... keep up the good work and who knows?”

This had been yet another big test, he’d wet without any encouragement, but this had needed pressure and deprivation to get him to comply. Still, he’d done it now and she was unbelievably proud of him. Quite simply, that might have been down to the fact that she now thought of him as a little kid and, although that wasn’t supposed to be the idea, the thought was happily held in her head.

“But mum,” he tried to get his snivelling under control, “this can’t be what you want... I’m, I’m, (hic) not a little baby.”

Unfortunately for Robbie, as his mother looked down on him, she didn’t agree. A messy nappy, a tear-streaked face, pleading eyes and needing a mummy’s love to make things better. She wasn’t going to tell him, but yes, that’s just what he was, her baby boy.

“Well love, let’s think about it. You’ve been returned to wearing a nappy for a reason...”

“Yes, but I don’t know what for...” The frustration and absolute bewilderment at what he’d just done evident in his sad eyes. “I’ve not been told what it is I’ve done.” He sheepishly countered; face creased simply not understanding.

“We think you do know,” she gave him a look as if to say, ‘you aren’t fooling anyone’. “Now we think the return to wearing a nappy will give you time to contemplate on the ‘why’ and perhaps, once we see that recognition in you, then things might return to normal... well relatively.”

“But this is unfair, why do I have to use these damn things...” He pulled at the messy material, “It doesn’t make any sense...”

Even as he said the words he knew that his fate was sealed and the nappies, HIS nappies, were about to become a more permanent fixture than he had anticipated.

“Well son, to your father and I this is what you need... a simple and effective reminder of the repercussions for what you’ve been up to. You’ve abused your responsibilities of being grown up so now, as an aide-mémoire, a reminder if you like that you are in fact still a child, our child, you’re back in nappies. Not very subtle I’ll grant you, but we hope it will prove effective.”

The need in him to defy all of this, to shout “NO” at the top of his voice, to not just capitulate to his parents demands was brewing. He was agitated about what had happened, he couldn’t understand WHY it had happened and what’s more, even though he had a nappy full of shit, he was determined it wouldn’t happen again. Until that is his brain reminded him... THWACK!

Overcome with anger but still worried he bawled, “But I’m twelve... I can’t be a, a, a baby.” He stuttered whilst crying and not for the first time wondered why they were doing this? Could it be that he was growing up too fast? But that was a stupid motive surely they didn’t know his secret... did they?

Catching his baby reference Claire said. “But love, we remember the days when you were at your best and it was when you were a toddler and still wearing a nappy. Then you were such a happy and loving little boy; no secrets, no agenda, no...” she thought for a moment and then added “well... let’s just say... we’ve decided what’s for the best.”

“But a messy nappy... mum... that can’t be right.” He was unsure how he could put this any clearer because to him it just didn’t make sense.

She had some sympathy but there was no doubt that lying there in such a juvenile state, a lot of that brashness and flippant remarks had all but disappeared. What’s more, for the first time in ages he looked helpless and in need of his mummy and daddy... and that’s just what he was going to get.

“We’ll see sweetheart, we’ll see. We think you were at your best then and maybe it’s what you need now...mummy and daddy making all the decisions and your return to a time of innocence... but for the moment let’s get you out of this dirty nappy, hmm?”

The snivelling continued all the way through the clean-up and change; he was one very unhappy and very mystified twelve-year-old but perhaps weirdly, a fresh clean nappy was a wonderful relief. He was also out in the open, in the middle of the garden, where anyone paying a visit would be able to see.

“Mum, please can’t we do this indoors... please?” He begged.

“Sweetheart, you must not argue with mummy. She’ll decide where and when your nappy needs checking or changing... not my sweet little...”

“Mum, I’m not a baby please don’t...”

But his protest were in vain as whilst he closed his eyes and hoped no one else would see him, ‘mummy’, whether he liked her using the term or not, had him cleaned up and changed in just a few moments.

“There now,” his mother beamed as she proudly patted the finished item, “doesn’t that feel so much better?”

Compared to the dirty, sopping load that had been surrounding his waist, anything would be better. However, a look of incomprehension and disbelief on her son’s face was oddly offset by an unintentional nod of agreement, much to his mother’s approval. 

“Now then love,” she said tenderly “the secret to avoid wearing a messy nappy is to get into a routine.”

Robbie wanted to say that the secret was not to wear one in the first place and just get on with things he’d done since he was three... like get to the toilet on time but he wasn’t given the chance. She saw him about to speak and hushed him into silence.

“Now, as we’ve told you we’ll make every effort to change you as soon as we know your nappy needs it but, if you get into a routine then you can more or less be free from constant checks.”

She could see he was not happy as she patted the thick padding, an action that was enforcing the fact this was now part of him. There was a slight wriggle as Robbie got used to his fresh underwear and Claire couldn’t get over just how much pleasure she got from seeing his fleecy white nappy and ducky pins through the glossy plastic and the subtle rustle gave an aural aspect to what was before her. As far as she was concerned it was all simply... Perfection.

“What I suggest is that in the morning when we change you out of your lovely thick night time nappy that you take the opportunity to fill it before that happens. That way, you’re not carrying any poo around during the day when opportunities to change and clean you up might be a little more difficult.”

He looked horrified at the suggestion.

“So, we expect our morning changes to be messy but at least it will be out of the way, then, apart from any accidents, which of course we’ll deal with as soon as we can.”

“But mum...”

“It’s for your own good sweetheart, take my advice or not, it’s your choice but do you really want to be wearing a messy nappy for any longer than you need to?”

Robbie wanted to say it was no choice at all, he was being made to act like a toddler but knew that shouting wasn’t going to work. “But mum, I don’t...”

“Those are your options sweetheart and it’s up to you whether you follow my advice. Oh, and in case you’re wondering, things won’t change, the nappy stays for all your toilet activities... OK?”

“But mum... please... I... I...”

“Shhh, shhhh, shhhhh, sweetheart, this is happening so why not make the best of it… who knows… you might just enjoy it.”

He was stunned into silence – might just enjoy it... joking right?

That was her final words on the subject and although horrified he knew it wasn’t going to end anytime soon.

~ tbc ~

 

Part 4

The days since he was forced back into nappies had seemed to drag on. He’d stopped meeting or calling friends, coming up with excuse after excuse as to why he wasn’t available for the next gang ‘event’. Oddly, when they did call, they didn’t seem that bothered if they saw him or not, they still had each other so Robbie not being around wasn’t a problem. In other circumstances he might have been saddened by this rejection but wearing padding full time made him change his attitude in other ways as well.

He tried his best to alternately argue against his circumstances or sulk - but to no avail - both attitudes were met with love and understanding but were not going to change anything. Because she was around all the time Claire poured more and more love into the situation, continually telling him that everything was as it should be and he shouldn’t worry.

Unfortunately, her day-to-day attitude was confusing, treating him as a toddler one minute and then normally the next. When she changed him (he wasn’t allowed to change himself) she would speak sweetly and slightly babyish to him but once dressed it was more adult... well... not adult exactly but more like it used to be. It seemed that as long as he was wearing a nappy she was happy... and he always wore a nappy.

Because the nappy fit so well Robbie could occasionally forget that he was being punished. When his parents were around he did a physical and mental shrug as if he wasn’t being put out at all. He hoped by his indifference they would think it wasn’t bothering him but of course, they’d seen the many changes in his character so knew it was working.

So, each morning, mum in particular seemed to love releasing him from his heavy messy night time nappy, cleaning him up or sending him for a shower before putting him into his less thick, but no less substantial, daily padding. She just loved the routine of lotion, powder, fleecy nappy pinned expertly on and then the soft crinkle as she pulled up his lovely malleable plastic covers. This would lead her to make a fuss by ensuring the material was all encompassed by the thick plastic cuffs “…to prevent leaks”. She would assure him all was well and pat the lovely shiny smooth bulk in admiration of her work.

Despite his pretend indifference there were creepy concerns he had to get used to, like the way the heaviness of the packaging made him walk. He wondered if the smooth rounded bulge in the seat and front of his shorts that his mother found so endearing, looked a complete giveaway. (He’d tried to find a better alternative to shorts but there was no denying that the different pairs he had hid the thickness better than jeans or trousers, which barely fit any more). He’d complained that it felt heavy and was dragging him down at the back but mum just thought he was imagining it as to her, it all looked fine.

Meanwhile, the strange way it felt, whether tightly pinned on or not, it just felt, well, not exactly uncomfortable but definitely different when he sat down. The padding acting as a buffer between him and whatever he sat on... really weird.

Or the way the plastic pants gripped his thighs or clung securely around his waist making him leakproof. It was taking some getting used to… even though he didn’t want to get used to it.

There were other considerations like the transformation between the thicker night time nappy and the one he wore during the day and how that impacted around his genitals. For one thing it restricted access and at times that was more than a little frustrating.

Sometimes, when he was just moping around the house, it was awkward getting used to the cushiony fabric, whilst the subtle rustle as he moved was a constant reminder, especially as there seemed no end in sight of when it would end.

Then there was the ‘biggie’ - the fact that he was wetting his nappy more frequently and without his input, it was just happening. Thankfully, because of his mother’s advice, his messy nappy change was concluded at the beginning of the day so, although absolutely disgusting, wasn’t as much of a problem.

All these padded related perceptions, whether he wanted them to or not, were impacting on his senses the entire time, which of course was his parent’s intention - Make the boy think about what he’d done and why he was now wearing nappies!

Their point throughout all this was so he knew he was still only a child and needed to be looked after. They wanted him to be aware of that and his nappy fitted the criteria completely. They continually insisted that it was because of what he’d done he was back wearing nappies so he had only himself to blame.

~

When he’d initially ‘agreed’ to this he was confident of it only lasting a couple of days ‘to teach me a lesson’. Now permanently in them, and with the stipulation he had to use them, the situation was causing him to fear keeping it a secret, which so far, he hoped he’d been able to do pretty well.

To begin with there had been times when he’d wished he could speak to someone about this madness... but to who would he want to admit he wore a nappy? - The gang? Definitely not. His uncles and aunts? No he needed to keep it quiet and doubted they’d be on his side anyway. His grandparents? Again, it was a punishment and they’d probably think he deserved it (in some ways he supposed he did). It was hardly a thing you could go to the police about and besides, the less he had to do with them the better - they might just want to know his secret and that was a definite no-no. His parents had said it was just between the three of them so...

However, the over-riding issue was his dread of being physically beaten, and the real thing he was guilty about becoming known. It had absorbed his thoughts ever since being put into a first nappy for over eight years. He’d expected that the punishment would last no more than a day or so and that once that time expired things would return to normal.

Except, everything had become more intense. The level of inspection and control by his parents had risen but so had the amount of loving attention. He hated having to mess in his nappy (thus the thicker nightly padding) and tried to convince them it was unnecessary, but they disagreed. They stayed positive, encouraging and affable so he was finding being moody ineffectual.

“Aw, is our sweet boy having a paddy, mmm? Don’t worry we’re here to change your nappy when you need it.” It wasn’t mocking exactly but there was an inflection that meant he wasn’t persuading anyone.

“Your nappy”, “your nappy”, “your nappy” it was constant. Each reference, or change or, well, any reason at all, both mum and dad were insistent that he knew it was his nappy and the reason why, was because of what he’d done.

He’d held off using his padding for as long as possible but in the end, he still had to go. He found it totally humiliating asking to be changed. Although in those early days his parents would just shove a hand down his pants and check. If he was wet, they simply looked disappointed that he hadn’t said anything and point him towards the changing mat. Strangely, even though they weren’t on show, the fact that there seemed to be nappies within reach and easily available everywhere in the house or in mum’s bag meant he was usually sorted out quite quickly.     

Because of his nappy he didn’t want to go out much although some of his mates (not the school gang) did manage to coerce him out occasionally (usually at the insistence of his parents who didn’t like him just hiding out in the house). Of course, he was more subdued than he’d been in the past but so far had managed to keep the padding a secret. He’d convinced those friends that his current lack of mobility was because he injured himself playing football and had strained a muscle. The explanation seemed to do the trick and deflected any further questions.

However, trips to relatives were a more troublesome factor; he couldn’t get out of any such visit so was on edge the entire time. It made him furtive, off hand and on-guard for the least thing - a suspected knowing look, a misinterpreted comment or laugh. Early on he’d angrily laid into his cousins, who were younger than him because he thought they were laughing at his padding. That wasn’t the case, they were just happy to see their older cousin and have him to play with, but he made them cry and upset a nice family event. He was made to apologise but was furious at having been put into that position in the first place. Although his secret was kept by his parents he still stormed off to sit in the car until it was time to leave.

That did not go down well.

Because he’d acted up, he woke up to find his Play Station removed. As a result of that, and because of further disagreements, his mobile was also confiscated - an action that left him quite devastated. Without his means of communicating with his pals, and all the other access it gave him, he was thrown into having to entertain himself. The fact he didn’t want to meet people whilst wearing a nappy then reduced his circle of friends even further. When he complained about the lack of his console mum simply pointed out that he still had a cupboard full of toys and games he could entertain himself with, “You used to love your LEGO... why not play with that?”

He was seething and tearful but somehow knew that any further outbursts wouldn’t do him any favours. The thing was, without his mobile phone (which he relied on mum and dad paying for) it was like he’d lost a limb... he felt cut off and alone. Although he wouldn’t want any of his friends knowing about - well his underwear situation - he did wish that he had that contact with the ‘outside world’. He hoped that if he tried to be less argumentative and put up with the embarrassment he now found himself in that he’d eventually win it back. What he was slow to realise was that all these restrictions and penalties were working; his parents were pleased that they were getting results so quickly, so naturally they were encouraged by what they were doing.

~

However, because he’d been ‘naughty’ (as his mother described his nasty outburst and making his cousins cry) he wasn’t allowed to fester at home and was often dragged out in public to do the shopping where, on most occasions, they’d end up bumping into mum’s friends or neighbours. Despite his pleading he simply wasn’t going to be left on his own. The threat (which his parents reminded him about before every outing) of having his nappy checked in public meant he was on his best behaviour, which was noticed by everyone. Some even commented on this but no one knew the reason, they thought he’d just turned over a new leaf. Although desperately resentful and unhappy Robbie was at least (inwardly) grateful that his secret was being kept to within the family... or so he hoped. So, as far as he knew his parents hadn’t made a public thing about him being back wearing protection - so that was something.

Actually, and though he wouldn’t want to admit it, another thing he was grateful for; the back garden wasn’t overlooked, so his mother’s penchant for drying washing on the line meant his freshly laundered nappies and plastic pants remained relatively private. There was yet another bonus, one that he didn’t realise was happening to begin with but, the praise from others about how he looked and his new improved behaviour, was, like positive comments from his parents, embarrassing but also oddly pleasing.

He was always nervous on any trip out that his padding would be obvious under his now regulation shorts. Thankfully the weather was relatively fine and loads of kids his age were wearing shorts of one kind or another, so it wasn’t that bad. Unfortunately, it was difficult to conceal his bulky padding completely and that little ‘nappy shuffle’ he’d adopted was a dead giveaway to anyone in the know. Also, and it was something his mother especially liked to see, often when he sat down the hem of plastic could just be seen down his short’s leg hole. Other parents would nod but thankfully, if they noticed that or the lovely little crinkle his plastic pants made with each movement, they kept their observations to themselves. He may not have been aware but on several of these occasions his mother received knowing wordless smiles of understanding and approval as often the faint aroma of baby powder followed him around.

“Well Robbie, you’re looking very smart these days,” friends and neighbours would say and he’d stretch to stand up taller than his 4’6” and try to appear older. His mum would beam with pride and pat his slightly bulging shorts and agree that she loved the fact that he’d turned over a new leaf. How many of her friends she was fooling she didn’t know but they all appeared quite supportive.

~

So, for the past couple of weeks his parents had praised him when he used his nappy and took delight in changing it. To his humiliation each morning he was greeted with a lovely soft fabric nappy and a pair of rustling plastic pants to replace the soaked and saggy one he inevitably displayed. He’d quickly slipped into a routine of his parent’s design and, despite the occasional act of attempted defiance, things progressed satisfactorily.

No matter how much he despised the idea he realised that his mother’s advice about filling his nightly nappy ready for a change made sense. He wasn’t going to get out of not using it so he just had to get on with what had been decided. Mercifully, the deed was usually done for the day, and he didn’t have to think about anything other than a damp nappy, which was something else he was disturbingly getting used to.

There was no denying that once cleaned up and wearing fresh padding everything felt better, then it was up to him what he wore. He soon found that his ‘cool’ but ‘rude’ clothes (they were the latest fashion and what his gang mates wore) produced a negative response from his parents so started dressing in clothes that had been hinted at as being more in keeping with what they thought suitable.

At home and when visiting friends or relations, the instruction was he wore shorts and plain t-shirts, polo shirts or jumpers, though, at first, when out with his mates (as mentioned - more so neighbours and not as much the lads from school) he could wear an old ill-fitting pair of jogging pants. He could just about hide his awkward nappy but at least he was grateful he didn’t get any comments. His parents were correct, the heavy weight was a constant reminder of whatever it was he’d done. He could feel the padding all the time so his ventures out to meet up with his friends grew less and less. However, both parents thought he looked a scruff in jogging bottoms, so that’s why they decided it would smart shorts, when out with them... and at home, when he could do without shorts altogether.

“Mum you’re dressing me like a little kid,” he’d try to complain.

“And your point is?” She would answer knowing under his shorts was a thick babyish nappy.

On one occasion, at a café they’d gone to when out shopping, when his drink and sandwich arrived the waitress also put down a place mat with a drawing on it that could be coloured in with the five crayons he was also given. The outburst of anger was quickly subdued when his mum told him to “Thank the nice lady...” but he didn’t have to fill it in if he didn’t want to. The waitress’s smile departed fairly quickly because she thought she was doing a nice thing but Robbie was seething and desperate to show just how much. However, a warning look and the promise of a nappy check soon saw the anger change to one of anxiety and the moment passed.

A faint, almost childlike, “Thank you miss,” almost passed unheard but the waitress nodded and smiled back at this shy boy who, out with his mummy, looked so cute.

~

With so much going on there was an inevitable change of attitude which, although he may not have noticed, Robbie was beginning to slip into. Of course there were still the occasional sighs, and burgeoning arguments and appeals but they had become less strident and quickly ran out of steam. Or, and this was more likely, Robbie knew he wasn’t getting anywhere with them and were, quite possibly, the reason for the length of time he had to spend dressed in such a way. Despite babies not seemingly bothered about wearing a nappy, Robbie was learning that having one constantly hugging your bits and pieces was not much fun but, and this was a surprise, because he had to wear one, he was sort of getting used to it.

There were many occasions, especially at night or in the morning when he’d just dumped a load in the back of his nappy, that he wondered if it was worth it. Indeed, he’d argue with himself that confessing to his real crime would be beneficial, because if he was sent to prison, at least he wouldn’t have to wear a damn nappy.

However, he’d seen far too many films about what life was like behind bars and, if he was scared of the strap, he was even more scared of that happening. No, that revelation would have to stay locked away. He was sure that they would tire of this stupid nappy business before too long. He’d been surprised as to the length of time already but surely it couldn’t continue indefinitely - could it?

Sometimes, because it was easier for mum to check he’d be there wearing just his nappy and plastic pants. She’d even caught him amusing himself with some of his old toys. Seeing him so absorbed in his imagination like that had to be recorded so she’d whip out her mobile and secretly film him at play.

So, in only a couple of weeks this ‘new and improved’ Robbie who was polite, looked smart and stayed close to mum and dad was the person those outside the family saw. Sometimes, if his nappy was particularly wet or had bunched up, he’d quietly whisper the problem to his mum, and she’d make an excuse and leave to sort him out.

The first time she took him into a baby changing room had been a shock, even more so when there were others waiting to change their babies, but mum simply got on with her task. She didn’t explain or return the strange and intrigued looks; it wasn’t an issue to change her wet boy. He didn’t like other people looking on as his nappy was removed but dared not react in case, he was spanked in public. Having his legs lifted so that some cream could be applied and powder spread about was mortifying but stayed quiet not daring to give away the fact he was not a ‘special needs’ boy. Mum would continue her encouragement and tell him what a “good boy” he was being as she’d pin him tightly into fresh padding and pull up his softly rustling plastic pants. After that, Robbie was more careful with where and when he needed a change.

~

At one point he’d complained that wearing shorts all the time made him look like a little kid, but his parents just reminded him that he spent almost all his life wearing his favourite football kit. That was a red shirt and matching red shorts with team logo splashed all over and had never complained about that, even being proud to support his team by wearing it on trips out or visits to relations. It was the same with his school footy and rugby kit, he’d often wear it around the house. So, what was the difference now he simply had to wear smart shorts and top? He was stumped into silence by their irrefutable rationality.

Of course, there were occasions when he still complained about being treated as a little kid. His mother pointed out that wasn’t true because when he was a tot, he wandered around the house wearing only a nappy, but, if he preferred the simplicity of that she was happy to oblige. It was then he made up his mind that shorts were no problem at all.

Despite all this the holiday to Portugal was upon them though nothing had been said about him still wearing a nappy whilst abroad. He knew that his mother wouldn’t buy disposables for ‘eco’ reasons and doubted very much if she’d pack loads of fabric nappies because of restrictions in the baggage allowance. Also, the laundry bill alone would be astronomical so felt safe with his assessment that the nappy situation would be coming to an end. Not only that but he’d survived the punishment without admitting to anything too drastic or his big guilty secret. So, despite the current nappy, he was feeling quite proud of himself.

The night before the trip was the first early night in ages that he didn’t mind going to bed because he was convinced everything would return to normal when getting ready for their flight.

~

When Claire and Thomas had first come up with the idea of returning their son to wearing a nappy, they thought of it more as a ‘psychological challenge’. They knew there’d be problems and arguments but if they could keep Robbie wondering about the ‘WHY’ and rely on his own inner guilt, they could maintain the upper hand.

The concept was fraught with complications – would he just ignore them or maybe simply not feel guilty about what he’d done? There was absolutely no guarantee that returning their twelve-year-old to nappies would have any effect or not have themselves up on a charge of child cruelty.

For this reason they didn’t put him under ‘house arrest’ he could come and go as he pleased but only if he wore his nappies. They didn’t ban him from seeing friends but knew that wearing a nappy would restrict who he wanted to mix with. Also, with school out, that was one area of concern that they could potentially ignore. Robbie could do what he liked but he would be wearing a nappy whilst doing it. He decided he didn’t want to socialise and his parents accepted his decision. So, the more he stayed in their sphere of influence the better they liked it.

Somewhere, in the jumble of words, thoughts and actions, and the Worldwide Web, on certain sites getting a child into nappies was regarded as a possible way of regaining control over that child. Who had decided on this as ‘fact’ was uncertain although Claire was under the impression that the ‘nappy notion’ had come from her thinking back to how things were when Robbie was a toddler, though putting it in perspective, that link seemed a bit vague. The fact that they took such an idea and ran with it to the point that now he was wearing a nappy, and the action was working, they made the decision to continue. So, all in all, who cared where the initial concept came from?

However, they weren’t psychologists or teachers, so why had this particular idea stuck... and why were they so happy about it and eager for it to continue?

Despite these qualms, and for whatever the reason, they did everything with a smile. Even when Robbie was losing some of his privileges, like the Games Console and mobile phone and early nights, they made it so that he knew it was because of things he’d done and not that they were just punishing him for the sake of it. Gentle but unswerving insistence that this was all down to him and his behaviour. The principle was simple – wearing a nappy would be a constant reminder that this situation was down to him and that he’d have to think carefully about everything he did. He was still a child and his parents were doing what they thought was the best for him.

When out in public he didn’t want an unannounced hand down the front of his shorts checking if he was wet or not, so he let them know as soon as it happened. His parents were then very reassuring and full of praise that he’d told them and so it had a positive effect on him... it became less awkward. Robbie feared public humiliation and had quickly learnt that by following mum and dad’s rules his situation was kept between the three of them. However, he was keenly aware that the situation could change and there was nothing to stop either of them announcing to the world he was now their little nappy-wearing toddler. Not surprisingly, and despite such early resistance, that also kept him in check as much as any threat of physical punishment.

The thing was… it was working much better than they could possibly have anticipated. In some ways Claire and Thomas wished they had instituted the idea of nappying their son a lot earlier. Perhaps that would have made him miss his association with the school gang but of course, had that been the case then none of this would have been relevant. Even though they were no nearer a full confession or knowing precisely what he’d been up to, they’d heard the rumours from neighbours, friends and school about the gang’s, and by inclusion their son’s, appalling behaviour. What they had now was a sweetly behaved young lad who was rapidly becoming a credit to them. Nappies were working.

Although she wouldn’t admit it to her husband Claire had very quickly adopted the approach of treating him more as a juvenile. She loved the way he looked wearing nappies and plastic pants and would have liked to take things further but didn’t. However, his nappies were thick and the covers a substantial, glossy protection smoothing out the bulky cushion. In truth she thought he’d never looked better, even if she’d unintentionally (?) reduced him to a waddling tot.

Robbie wasn’t aware of the change in his behaviour (well apart from not seeing school mates now they were on the summer break), because he thought about everything he did before he did it. The nappy he wore, and his crinkly plastic pants made for each activity needing to be planned. His parents had lovingly advised as to what was acceptable to wear so he had to work within those rules. However, despite not being cheerful about such limitations he’d accepted them remarkably quickly - much to mum and dad’s surprise.

A couple of times, when his mum had changed him and he was dressed only in a nappy and plastic pants he’d put on his Death Cult t-shirt or try his baggy red and black Gangsta style shorts but had to agree... it just didn’t look right (no matter how much he wished it did). They may be OK for the beach but for hanging around the house, well, it wasn’t worth upsetting his parents.

Nappy changes were always a happy and affirming affair because both parents didn’t mind how messy he was - it was what their boy needed so it was done with a smile and words of approval. As with every change, Claire enjoyed the process and continued to think her boy had never looked more adorable than when wearing his thickest nappy and the shiniest plastic pants. Repetition, reinforcement and responsibility was hammered home on every occasion but Robbie just didn’t get it, he still thought he was being treated as a little kid and resented that as a twelve-year-old that was the case. Nevertheless, what had started as total embarrassment (and it was only an embarrassment for him because nobody else knew) was now just something he had to put up with.

In fact, in a relatively short space of time (a few days) his parents saw a huge change in their son’s demeanour. He was more attentive and less angry, politeness, which hadn’t been one of his strengths, was beginning to seep through and his general affability was a return to how he used to be before he fell in with the school bad boys.

He’d lost a great deal of ‘attitude’ and had, as far as mum and dad could tell (and they reinforced the change) actually returned to acting like he had when he was a lot younger, which they both found delightful. Then there had been a lovely, unsophisticated innocence when Robbie’s world revolved around them, he still had his childish ways and giggled, he was such a lovely and loving little boy.

Although he’d grown, he still wasn’t that tall. His physique was slim and blemish free but occasionally he’d come home from school with a few bruises from playing football but in general, he still had the appearance of a young boy. How he’d let himself get mixed up with the school’s notorious tearaways was a mystery.

Mum and dad had kept him scrupulously clean and free from any of the complications that wearing a nappy might induce, like nappy rash. Mum had applied a cream that offered not only to keep him reasonably waterproof but also ensure the area smooth and dermatologically clear.

With the lack of any electronic games or even his mobile to play with, he found himself needing some form of distraction, so ended up in his room playing with some old toys. This was yet another thing his mother in particular found enchanting and, when not secretly filming the event, had herself got down on the floor and joined in with him. Encouraging him to let his imagination run riot, whilst shuffling around the carpet on his hands and knees pushing a toy and looking for all the world like a worry-free little lad.

She was always pleased to see the roundness of the padding whether under his shorts or not, it only added to his boyish charm. She was quite amazed at how endearing he looked when he stopped trying to be anything but a little kid who only wanted to enjoy himself. Well, that’s what was running through her mind at least.

What his parents were unaware of was the fear Robbie saw in those early days of being beaten with a strap. He’d never said anything to them about this mental worry but that thought continually resonated in his brain.

THWACK!

He still didn’t know why he was being punished in this way, he hadn’t confessed to anything specific, but guilt and the probability of physical punishment had driven a lot of the changes his mum and dad now found acceptable... and why he found himself wearing padding all the time.

Something else that was impacting in his twelve-year-old mind was the fear they would actually know his worst secret. He thought they couldn’t possibly know that because he anticipated the punishment would be much, much worse than having to wear nappies. That fear had meant he argued but argued less, weirdly, as a result, became more susceptible to his parent’s praise, like he had been when younger. Because of this change it bolstered their idea that they were correct - Robbie being made to wear a nappy (and use it) had certainly changed his conduct considerably on a day-to-day basis.

His parents met everything he did with positivity and made it so that as far as they were concerned this was all natural and how things should be. They got into a daily rhythm of changing his wet and messy nappy and surprisingly they found Robbie become more and more at ease with it. So, as far as they were concerned, the ‘psychology of the nappy’ was working just fine and certainly, for the near future, saw no reason to change that dynamic.

~ tbc ~

 

Part 5

It was 5am when Robbie was awakened from deep sleep and urged to get up. He’d been very excited the night before and it had taken him quite some time to drop off so was still very sleepy when mum came to rouse him.

She threw back his bedding to make sure he was fully awake and noticed, from the heavy urine smell, that as usual he’d soaked his nappy but had yet to mess it. Meanwhile, Robbie hoped he’d wake up dry just to prove a point but alas no. Over the past few nights he’d wet only when awake, he wanted to be in control, but, well, it took him a moment to register his damp condition, and, as his mum encouraged him to get out of bed, found himself humbled. The willpower he wanted to exhibit was just an illusion. He hoped (if that was the correct word), that the sogginess was down to being overly stimulated about this holiday and not that he was now a true bed-wetter.

The truth, which he was trying to deny, was that now he had to wear a nappy all the time, and use it, he’d begun to do so without much thought. He hated it, the bulky damp material bunching up between his legs, but had to admit that his parents were very attentive and wasn’t left for too long in a waterlogged state. However, even if it wasn’t instantly changed, the weight of a sopping wet nappy was even more of a reminder that he was in fact, as his mother would often remind him, a ‘naughty boy’ who was being punished.

Still, at 5am he was a bit groggy but knew they had to be at the airport a few hours earlier than departure to get through checks and passport control and the taxi to take them there had been booked for 6am.

“It’s okay love,” his mother saw his disappointment but tried to soothe him, “the nappy takes care of these things, so no harm done.” She gave a comforting smile whilst also stroking his head reassuringly. From that first day when he’d been returned to wearing a nappy to his now strange acceptance of his situation, Claire had known exactly how she wanted her son to be and how he should dress. The way Robbie’s plastic pants moulded themselves around his soaked nappy producing a slick and shiny cover had never lessened being a lovely sight to her. It meant the cover was doing its job by protecting the bed from any leaks and keeping her boy’s padding in place. There was nothing about such a sight that she didn’t find endearing.

He felt he’d let himself down, as if the world had conspired to make him less of a twelve-year-old and more of a ‘tweeny’. Tears, which in the recent past wouldn’t have been far away, were no more - just a simple sniff of recognition to what had happened and let mum get on with the job. 

He wasn’t too sure why this one wet morning, against so many previous wet mornings, had affected him to such an extent, but it had. Possibly that as they were about to depart for Portugal, he hoped that the use of such juvenile underwear would no longer be the case.

“You see sweetheart,” she ran her hands over the slinky plastic, “a nappy is a good thing for such occasions so, even when you’re least expecting it, it can come to the rescue. Now, have a quick shower and I’ll be waiting when you get back... don’t worry love, we have this covered.” As usual mum was putting a positive spin on it, but it missed the target.

Disappointedly he made his way to the bathroom, threw the heavy soaked terry fabric into the sink and eased himself under the warm spray. Whilst in the area mum claimed the sopping material and took it off to soak, she didn’t want to leave a smelly nappy lying around for the couple of weeks they’d be away.

~

Perhaps in this day and age, and possibly counterintuitively, Claire had loved her growing boy being back in nappies. She liked all the extra work and enjoyed the smell of freshly washed terry cloth nappies she’d dried out on the washing line. The clear plastic pants were thick, crinkly, effective and durable but now craved a bit of colour in her, and therefore, her boy’s life. An occasional colourful cover would soon form part of his nappy regime... and the festive spirit of the holiday seemed a perfect time to start.

Robbie knew none of that and a few minutes later, refreshed and feeling a little better (he’d sneakily used the toilet for a quick dump whilst mum was busy) he arrived back at his bedroom to find she was waiting with travel clothes already set out. She guessed he would have used the toilet but it was really a ruse to save time, she still had his ‘underwear’ covered. To his irritation there appeared to be a disposable and pair of pale blue plastic pants waiting for him.

“Oh mum,” he moaned and pointed accusingly, “surely I don’t have to wear those to travel in....”

“Well why not sweetheart?” She asked knowing that a twelve-year old’s tantrum was about to become a reality. “The journey can be long, with queues and possible delays, you’ll be glad of some protection I can assure you.”

It’s not like airports don’t have toilets he thought but decided to say nothing because...

“But, but...” He was desperately trying to act like a proper teenager who didn’t need a nappy but... THWACK!... his mind had other thoughts. It was weird because as soon as he thought about protesting that mental image of physical punishment sent it scattering and all he could ‘feel’ was the phantom blow on his bare posterior.

“Haven’t you just used your nappy?” His mother asked pleasantly trying to reinforce the fact as nicely as possible that since wearing a nappy it had proved useful on several occasions.

This was where the two didn’t see eye-to-eye; she thought they helped him when he peed (lovely protection), he thought if he wasn’t made to wear a nappy then he wouldn’t be peeing in it.

Like Robbie knew from the beginning, they didn’t accept the fact it was their fault for returning him to wearing a nappy. This, as they reiterated time after time, was all down to him.

“You continue to believe that none of this is because of what you’ve done,” she’d shake her head, “but until you accept your responsibility, and acknowledge the reasons why this is all your fault, you’ll simply stay wearing your lovely padding.”

He knew where any such argument was going but even so, didn’t want to wear any padding on holiday. Somehow she made him doubt that this wasn’t normal so therefore it was perfectly common for him to be wearing such thick insulation.  

“Muuumm,” he whined, “when will I be out of this...?”

She just shook her head and smiled whilst flapping out the disposable to let air get into it. These days, for her at least, keeping her boy padded was the most natural thing in the world.

Whilst she was doing that, instead of the usual compliant boy, the twelve-year-old with attitude raised his head for old time’s sake and was determined that this should all finish NOW.

“Mum, I’m not wearing one of those whilst we’re away... it’ll be too hot and... and...” seizing an opportunity, “I thought you were dead against disposables for ecological reasons... seems that...”

“Oh love,” she shook her head as if the poor boy hadn’t grasped anything, “these are for your benefit to travel in. Less bulk and less obvious but, if you prefer the nice thick fabric ones I’m sure I can accommodate your preference.”

The way she seemed so concerned left him a bit confused – did she really think that he preferred to wear a thick fabric nappy?

“Er, oh, ermmm, well, ummm...” He dithered; he really didn’t want to wear a nappy at the start of the holiday.

She listened to his stuttering argument, whilst at the same time gently manipulating and stretching the small flat object as it became much larger and a more substantial item for him but nowhere near the size of a fabric nappy.

“Well love, we’re on a tight schedule and you can get ready now and do as you’re told or... we can go without you.”

A sulky Robbie was shocked at her immediate reply and certainly didn’t want to miss his vacation but nor did he want to wear padding to travel in. Thinking he could win this by telling her to leave him on his own was a bad move. She called his bluff.

“So, you’re not coming then?” She wanted confirmation.

“No, not if I have to wear them...” he said folding his arms and nodding in the direction of the expanded disposable and plastic pants. He was unsure if this was the right track to take but he’d started down that road and didn’t feel he could turn back.

“Okay then” and she picked up her phone, “I’ll just call granny and you can stay with her whilst we’re gone. I’ll let her know about the nappy rule so you’ll be wearing them there whilst we’re away no matter what. Also, she has things around the house that need doing so you can help with them as well. Ah, morning mother...”

~

He knew from past experience that granny was firm but not fair, demanding and didn’t suffer children’s moods very well at all. A couple of weeks in her care would not have been a holiday or much fun so immediately grabbed the hated object from his mother’s hand and acquiesced to her instructions.

“Ah, just to say our farewells and remind you we’ll be gone for two weeks so, if you could pop in occasionally and check for post and stuff that would be ideal.”

Robbie didn’t hear the conversation from his granny’s side because he was already being lotioned and powdered.

In just a few moments a defeated and totally submissive Robbie was wearing a lovely comfortable disposable; the more absorbent but lighter material taped tightly in place. Because of his little ‘rebellion’ she added an extra soaker pad to make it thicker and, having done so thought the new blue plastic pants looked even better stretched as they were; very shiny and appealing to the eye if they were to be seen. Although she didn’t want to embarrass her son just for the sake of it, she thought they looked splendid but pulled up a sensible pair of pale blue thigh-length shorts to cover them. If he had to wear shorts, he would have preferred knee length like his beach shorts. Alas, though he didn’t know it yet, all his mother packed were thigh length and shorter shorts. However, despite his initial resistance, there was no denying that her boy was now well-padded so he’d just have to cope.

He stood in front of his mum like a thoroughly chastised naughty little boy. She thought he looked adorable wearing just his disposable and plastic pants, whilst his sulky, defeated demeanour added the final touch. She couldn’t get over how he’d gone from a verbose and annoying pre-teen to a slightly timid and compliant little kiddie. She knew she had the advantage so wanted to make sure he knew it as well.

“Now Robbie, I don’t want to go through this every time so, are we clear that you’ll do and wear what we request without further argument?” She waited for him to nod but it took some time for it to percolate through that once he agreed there would be no going back. “The plan is for a lovely, relaxing holiday for all of us and we don’t need you to be belligerent or fussy. If that’s you plan think again. I need to hear you say you’ll do as we say... or you can go and stay with granny.”

THWACK! It was just the thought of granny applying the strap, which he knew she’d have no problem with. Hesitantly but with that awful mental image he felt he had little choice, so finally submitted “Yes mum, I’ll do as I’m told.”

“Good boy and the correct decision. We didn’t want to leave you behind because we think this will be good for you... for all of us.” She ruffled his damp hair and sent him off to comb it back into place. “Now then, the padding is guaranteed to absorb more than your fabric protection so, we shouldn’t need to change you as often.” She patted his freshly nappied bum and gave him a smile that radiated warmth and pride, which for a second Robbie felt quite pleased to receive.

Once again she just thought he looked so damned adorable.

~

Claire had been most insistent when she helped him dress that he should wear what she decided. He didn’t know why she’d chosen, what he felt was a fairly juvenile outfit; the short, thigh-length blue shorts and matching polo shirt and light zippy-up jacket but the thought of being forced to stay at grandma’s house made him hold his tongue. His mother had simply said that he looked very handsome and “summery” and of course his parents dressed smartly as well. After all, they were equally excited about the trip.

“This is the first time since you were a baby that we’ve taken a holiday abroad so we want to look our best.” She’d said taking great care in getting him ready. “You look fantastic,” she added checking how the padding looked, whilst brushing his shoulders of any imaginary fluff, “a credit to us all.”

Despite these fine words Robbie was still a bit gloomy. There was no way in a month of Sundays, as a nearly teen, he’d ever want to wear what he was forced into now. Not that there was anything fundamentally wrong it was just ‘uncool’ even if it was something ‘summery’. However, the fact that it was almost time to leave – dad going through the check list to make sure everything was accounted for - the excitement of the trip was now real.

The taxi beeped its horn.

He had packed his case the night before and was all set to make the most of this holiday in the sun and the anticipation built another notch. So, despite having to wear a bulky disposable he didn’t put up any further argument. Besides, over the past few days he’d been on his best behaviour and his parent’s attitude had certainly been positive, so maybe, this was the final test before they got to their destination.

~

Without further comment they were able to be on their way to the airport on time. Astonishingly, throughout the taxi ride he thought the new disposable felt less intrusive and much more comfy than the fabric ones he’d had to get used to over the last couple of weeks.

They drove past a church that had a sign outside that offered – TEA AND A LISTENING EAR – and wondered if the place got many lads his age in discussing wearing a nappy? His thoughts ranged over a few topics as the taxi moved closer to their destination. His hand absentmindedly rubbing the subtle mound in the front of his shorts.

Of course he wasn’t totally happy, and, once they arrived at the airport, the knowledge of what he was wearing made him overly self-conscious, especially his slight shuffle as he pulled his wheelie luggage through to the check-in desk.

The place was packed but thankfully the checking–in line wasn’t too long. However, there were other kids booking in, excitedly and noisily scrutineering fellow travellers. Most were casually dressed, whilst few others were as smart as his little group. He searched around the huge busy and noisy departure lounge but could see no one, not even anyone younger than him, dressed like he was. He thought he looked like an eight-year-old schoolboy, whilst mum and dad just glowed with pride (partly that was because that’s exactly what he did look like and they were more than happy with that image).

There had been times since his return to wearing nappies, that his anxiety levels had left him with a rapidly beating heart and bizarrely bowel and bladder problems. The fact mum and dad were so positive had meant he was able to relax, even when he knew he should be horrified at what he’d become.

The constant “You’ve brought this on yourself” had made an impact and at times he believed it and so accepted his juvenile position. Sometime his unintended acceptance of the situation was swamped by his need to rebel but then the usual worry about everything would kick in and he was back to another anxiety attack. These were causing more pee-spurts than he realised, so he had a damp nappy, even if he wasn’t yet aware of that fact.

However, now he was away from home and travelling to a foreign country and surrounded by loads of happy, carefree people got him thinking. The fact that even if no one else knew, he knew that under his shorts there was childish padding and pair of rustling plastic pants, made him feel like he was just a little kid. Whether he liked it or not his parents approved of this look and kept up a barrage of compliments, which eventually began to please and relax Robbie as they moved through the airport. Their constant praise (and gentle reinforcement) relieved some of his anxiety and was therefore quite grateful for it.

“You look very smart son,” his dad smiled his comment, “we like this new look very much... it suits you.”

Strangely, and forgetting he thought he looked like an eight-year-old, because it was his father who’d said it, he felt particularly thrilled with the spontaneous praise and blushed. He caught sight of his reflection in a window and did a re-take – perhaps, all things considered, it didn’t look as bad as he at first thought.

~

Most of the clothes he’d packed included his favourite t-shirts with Death Rap singer’s lyrics, violent imagery or rude words all over them, which mum had decided were not welcome on this trip. This was going to be a lovely family holiday so she’d invested in a completely different wardrobe; a chance to reclaim their son and give him a different, more pleasing appearance.

The new clothes she’d bought were perhaps a little less ‘teenage cool” than she’d thought they were in the shop. Needless to say Robbie hadn’t been on that particular shopping expedition with Claire figuring he wouldn’t be able to complain if he had no options. The wheelie case he’d brought to the airport had, unknown by him, been emptied of all the clothes he’d packed - with an eye to being one of the ‘cool kids with attitude’ when they went anywhere. Alas it had all been replaced by a new set of his mother’s choosing. Also, something else he didn’t know was that in the case was an initial pack of colourful disposables that she intended for him to wear whenever they went anywhere apart from the beach. His favourite baggie beach shorts had also been replaced with a colourful neoprene swim shorts, which if he wanted to go in the pool, sea or on the beach he’d have to wear. There was room for a nappy under them. There was also a rubber sheet (just in case) and, because he’d complained that it felt like his packed nappy was occasionally falling down, a couple of short colourful onesies to help hold his padding in place. All this was going to be a surprise for Robbie once they were at the resort.

Prior to departure Claire had done her research and checked out what local pharmacies and supermarkets carried by way of youth-sized disposables and was happy to see that her preferences could be accommodated. However, there had been a sale online where she bought some disposables and thick fleecy nappies for the future (unbeknownst to Robbie) and was pleased that they’d included a couple of free packs of colourful plastic pants, which she included in his case. So, all in all, was happy that she had most eventualities covered.

Claire hadn’t admitted it to her husband but she was enjoying this treatment of their son more than expected. Seeing him now becoming a polite, smart boy with a nice haircut and no attitude had made him, because of the smooth lines of his nappy, appear much younger than he was. She was determined that they were enjoying the benefits of what could be done if you took the time to parent your kid properly. Maybe it took a bit of effort but thought it worthwhile.

~

For the moment, and completely oblivious of all this, and with his parent’s obvious good spirits and constant gestures of approval (he had been warned that any temper tantrums or arguments would mean he’d spend the entire holiday wearing just a nappy so that everyone would know his secret) he decided to make the best of the circumstances and try to enjoy the experience of air travel.

As mum had pointed out he’d been on a plane before but was only a baby so didn’t remember anything about it. He failed to see the absurdity that then, as now, he was wearing a nappy. However, try as he might to remain ‘cool’ he was quite excited about flying and found the entire process fascinating.  Animatedly, he stood at the large picture window that looked out over the runway and loved seeing all the planes, in their different livery, coming and going. He couldn’t wait to board himself and hoped he’d have a window seat. 

His mother appreciated just how enthusiastic he was watching all the comings and goings and actually saw him jumping up and down with excitement like a little kid when a particularly large aircraft pulled up close to the window. This became undeniable when she looked further along the window and noticed a little six-year-old, wearing jeans and a t-shirt that had a Simba cub on the front, who was acting in exactly the same unfettered way.

Seeing the two reacting in such a similar way made her chuckle and feel that maybe getting her sweet little boy back was not going to be as difficult as at first she and her hubby imagined it might be. She loved Robbie’s current playful, excitable nature and only hoped it wasn’t caused purely by the excitement of the airport. She had no trouble at all letting him be childish whilst he wore his nappy. In fact, she wondered if she could extend that response simply by encouraging that juvenile side of his hopefully developing youthful spirit.

Under the guise of checking her phone she recorded his excitement, it was another wonderful image to commit to the memory bank, as well as the rapidly growing video and photo folder.

“Is this ours?” He called out to her, eyes wide at the prospect.

“Afraid not sweetie, that’s a long-haul flight ours is a smaller plane but...” he looked disappointedly back to the plane but his mother noticed that his shorts had rode up and the edge of his shiny blue plastic pants could be seen.

She zoomed in for a moment.

Claire’s heart bubbled over with love and approval. With those little peaks of plastic, his nappy nicely rounding the contours of his shorts, in his current state Robbie had never been more endearing.

It was one of the “Aaahhhs” in appreciation moments – she thought how innocently adorable he appeared - but not wishing any embarrassment called him over and covertly pulled at his shorts to cover things up. She caressed his padded bum, it was an act that she’d enjoyed since first putting him back into nappies, then whispered what a good boy he was being.

The way he dressed was very important to her. The clothes and stance he’d adopted prior to being returned to wearing nappies always seemed to carry some sort of threat. Anger, disdain, hate and violence, even if alien to Robbie, was etched onto the messages of his preferred clothing. She was definite that would end and so, this new, mummy approved clothing was thought more appropriate.

Meanwhile, he seemed to miss the reference to being ‘a good boy’ or else he was just so used to being treated as he was the words didn’t seem out of place. In fact, this was very much what his parents were hoping for - although in truth it was Claire who was now the driving force to get him into a phase of being happy and reliant on them, appreciating all they did, whilst he maintained a sweet, juvenile attitude and appearance.

There had been many similar occasions when, because he’d simply forgotten about or got used to wearing them, his padding was really quite noticeable. The waistband of his plastic pants might end up on show after he’d been crawling around whilst at play, or his expanded padded bulge became apparent as he sat down unaware that such soggy padding made it that bit more evident. These moments, when he just was ‘unworldly little Robbie’ were what she wanted, and so far - so good - and had it on camera to prove it.

Of course, at the same time she was also secretly checking if he needed a change because in her tote bag there were a couple of disposables, just in case. There was little or no expansion to his padding so, he seemed fine and was so engaged in what was going on around him hadn’t spotted the unobtrusive inspection she’d just made. Nevertheless, she’d chosen this style of disposable because of its capacity and knew, with the extra soaker pad, that if he did pee, then it was able to soak up a great deal before a replacement would be needed. It would expand, and his shorts would get a good deal tighter but knew that at least there’d be no leaks, of this she was sure.

Whilst waiting for their flight dad had been to the café and returned with two coffees and a couple of cartons of juice for Robbie. They hadn’t had much chance of breakfast before they left so the bacon rolls he also brought back were hungrily devoured.

As a family they cut quite a tableau. Whereas most other families wore casual clothing, were a bit noisy and a bit ‘common’, they on the other hand, looked like they’d been hired to simply improve the image of the budget airline they were travelling with. However, they did get loads of smiles and nods of approval from some of the older travellers.

Perhaps weirdly Robbie was sitting content in his nappy – it was thick yet comfortable and, apart from the more rounded areas at the front and seat of his shorts, hardly showed at all. The padding making sitting around on those inexplicably uncomfortable airport chairs a little more pleasant.

~

Once on-board, Robbie took the window seat next to mum, whilst dad had the aisle seat. Meanwhile, the twelve-year-old was oddly enthusiastic about the prospect of take-off and as the plane built up speed down the runway, felt himself peeing in excitement - the two orange juices he’d drunk prior to boarding making a hasty exit. It was only when the ‘ping’ of the seat belt sign went out that he realised what he’d done and felt the nappy soak up and expand slightly. He sat staring out of the window, even though the clouds had obliterated any chance of seeing the ground pass by. Meanwhile, hoped mum hadn’t noticed what he’d done or could tell by his hot-flushed face that his comfy disposable might need changing.

As the flight progressed Robbie was encouraged to drink plenty of bottled water ‘to prevent dehydration’ and soon found that too was filtering through his system fairly quickly and depositing itself in the swelling material.

He wasn’t sure about how much the new disposable could hold but, as it was still quite comfortable and mum had said it would absorb more than his normal fabric ones, decided not to bother his parents. In the interim, they were deeply engaged in chatting to an older couple sitting across the gangway, so, settled back down to gazing at the patchy cloud and bits of visible land they were flying over. It was quite interesting as he wondered just where they were on their three hour journey.

The plane was quite full and he was amazed at how much went on with people walking up and down the aisle, the food and drink cart that trundled slowly past, the noisy announcements offering not only food but alcohol and gifts... oh, and lottery tickets. He checked the inflight mag and saw the strange array of items available to buy – on a plane six miles up in the sky – amazing.

There were groups and families on the flight and everyone seemed happy and excited, well that’s what Robbie thought but wished he’d been allowed to bring his mobile so he could listen to some music instead of his fellow passengers. He engrossed himself with the various holiday articles in the In Flight magazine.

“Are you wet sweetie?” His mother whispered later in the journey as she noticed the tightness at the front of his shorts and the slightly bulging plastic was visible as his shorts had ridden up and was evident down the leg.

Ashamed that he’d happily wet because it was less trouble but not wanting to lie he nodded.

“Don’t worry sweetheart, these are very good at absorbing loads of liquid and the plastic panties should hold everything in,” she said reassuringly tapping the bulge, “so you should be OK until we get past passport control.”

The thought of waddling his way through a foreign airport didn’t appeal but there again, neither did being accompanied to the plane’s little toilet to be changed by mum. Besides, there was always a queue and he definitely didn’t want to join that – he was content where he was, pressed up against the window, all very private. He smiled weakly, “No problem... I can wait” The soft rustling sound of his plastic pants as he wriggled himself into a more comfortable position was another noise that his mother had become delighted to hear.

Despite her conversations with fellow passengers Claire couldn’t help but feel for her son. Of course it had been a huge shock to him but now he was in nappies, she still thought it was what he needed. As he tried to catch up on some sleep, huddled against the plane’s window, she thought how delightful he’d become once away from those negative influences. A tear briefly came to her eye as she noticed him wriggle and once again heard the rustle of his plastic pants, the top of which appeared slightly above his waistband, all very innocent, and very child-like. What was even nicer was the way his hand gently rested on the now obvious bulge as if caressing a ‘cuddly friend’.

With each passing day Claire became more and more focused on making sure Robbie didn’t lose any of his newly found (and unexpected) juvenile behaviour. He may not have noticed it but mum had and liked what she saw. Her mind, as it seemed to do on a regular basis these days, skipped back to when he was a toddler and the hours they spent just having fun together. Every day was an adventure, every game a giggle and hugs. Dad was at work so it was only the two of them, so, when he came home at night the joy they both had showing him just what they’d been up to. They were a very closeknit, loving little family and she was determined that feeling should never leave them again. Good kid gone bad, gone good again was what she wanted. Claire had been staring at him dozing and had come to the same conclusion she had once he was back wearing a nappy - her little boy had never looked more loveable and was very grateful for that fact.

~

Even though it had expanded quite significantly Robbie thought the disposable was still more comfortable to wear than the fabric nappies he wore at home. His mother had guaranteed that his tight blue plastic pants, with the thick elastic leg and waist bands, would contain any leakage and for the first time he saw the benefits of wearing a disposable. It had saved him the fuss of getting up, wobbling his way to the rear of the plane and going to the loo, with mum carrying her bag, everyone would know what was going on. The entire process would have been a bigger undertaking had he still been wearing fabric nappies. However, although total appreciation of this ‘special underwear’ was a long way off, his mum had been right - a nappy, and in this case his padded disposable, did solve some problems.

Although that thought was in his head he still didn’t want to wear a nappy and was desperately hoping that after this flight and once at their villa things would somehow return to normality. What he didn’t know was that his parents were very happy with things as they were. As far as they were concerned he’d chosen wearing nappies over admitting to his multitude of transgressions. That was fine by them; his behaviour was most certainly better, he dressed smarter and, on a personal note, he looked so sweet when kitted out in a nappy.

With no dubious friends to influence him, and under mum and dad’s nappy control, Robbie may not have been aware of just what a difference he now presented to the world. He may have thought he looked like a little kid, though that was mainly down to the guilt he felt knowing he had padding on under his shorts. The truth was what mum had bought him had certainly made him look younger (that was true) but also clean cut, which couldn’t be said for a lot of his fellow young passengers.

Throughout the flight she wondered if any of the other parents had padded up their offspring to save going to the toilet but judging by the queue outside the plane’s facilities, perhaps not.

When she’d got Robbie ready for the journey that morning, and after the minor tantrum, she took delight in making sure his disposable was thick enough to contain any wetting but also how nice and smooth he looked once his genitals had been suitably encased in padding and plastic. There was something about this aspect that spoke volumes to her – it was as if she no longer needed to worry about him. He may have been twelve but that was no excuse to leave him to his own devises, he was her little boy and now, thankfully, he was protected and safe. She felt a lot more confident knowing this and appreciated that as long as he was suitably safeguarded she could keep him relatively innocent from the more callous aspects of life. This, like so many other positives she envisaged as a result of what they were doing for their son, made her pursue this course of action with even more fervour.

~

Once off the plane and through passport control Claire noticed that the disposable had expanded substantially making Robbie move with a pronounced shuffle. Although he looked cute, and the expansion had contoured to his bum nicely, which meant to the observant it would be obvious he was wearing a nappy, she didn’t want to embarrass him unnecessarily. She asked if he wanted to be changed at the airport or did he think he’d cope until they got their hotel. This came as a shock as he was under the impression they had their own villa.

“We’re staying in a hotel?” He asked suspiciously.

Dad was putting away their paperwork and passports and looking for the baggage area.

“Yes, why do you ask?” She wondered where he thought they were staying.

“I thought we were staying in that private villa we saw on the advert on TV... I’ve been telling everyone that we were staying in a glamorous villa... aren’t we...?”

“Afraid not love, but the hotel is four stars so should be okay...”

“But when the advert was on TV you said that’s where we were staying.” He sounded as if he’d been sold a lie.

“Yes, I may have done because that’s also here in the same holiday location where we’re going...”

“But I thought we’d have our own pool and private...” he sounded so downcast.

“Sorry love but that would have been too expensive for us. However, the deal we’ve got at the Atlantico is pretty good. Breakfast is included and it has three pools and looks directly onto the beach so it’s all there... and has regular entertainment for kids.” She added with delight thinking this would be yet another great selling point.

But he didn’t hear the last few points as he was so disappointed. The image he’d built up in his head was of private hilltop villa (like the one in the TV advert), luxurious surroundings with a private beach that only the hottest girls were allowed on. Instead, he was going to be in the company of hundreds of fellow holidaymakers... it wasn’t going to be the same.

However, once out of the air-conditioned airport and stepping into the sun the heat was more than agreeable and, slipping off his jacket, was glad he was wearing shorts as his father looked absolutely roasting wearing a suit.

~

They eventually found the tour operator’s coach and within twenty-five minutes were on their way to the hotel with a host of other excited vacationers. Whilst waiting for the bus Claire had started talking to another family who just happened to be staying in the same resort. The mum and dad were about the same age as them but had a son who Robbie guessed was about seven or eight. After the holiday rep had given the welcome speech and instructed them as to drop-off procedure they chatted as the coach travelled to their destination. By the time they arrived at the hotel the two families were almost the best of friends... well the mums were.

Although Robbie hadn’t said much Claire was pleased that at least he was friendly enough to the couple’s young son who appeared quite shy. She hoped that the two would team up so that they both had at least one friend they could meet up with. Darren was the boy’s name and looked very hot in the jumper and sweatpants he was wearing. Quite a contrast to the fresh looking, shorts-wearing twelve-year-old he occasionally smiled at. Robbie found it ‘funny’ as that family were dressed for the weather back home and that most of the holidaymakers had come for the sun but were now complaining about it being ‘too hot’. Some of the kids on the coach who were also overdressed and sweating were looking with envy at Robbie as he appeared relatively cool and ready to start his holiday straight away.

Mum wasn’t wrong when they pulled up outside the magnificent entrance to the Atlantico, the place was busy and milling with loads of holiday makers, some so brown it was obvious that they’d been there more than a week. There was plenty of red skin as well and mum reminded Robbie that he needed to keep himself well covered in Factor30 sun-cream. As they queued at reception to get their room allocated, mum started chatting to yet another family who’d arrived on a different coach. That mum was trying to control three kids: a five year old, a seven year old and a pushchair with a toddler in it. Apparently her hubby had made his way to the bar for a ‘quick pint’ whilst she did all the booking in. She looked completely frazzled and in definite need of a holiday. Claire secretly whispered to Thomas that he better not get any ideas. He smiled, shrugged and then it was their turn at the desk.

After an exchange of passports and the relative documents they were given an information pack about the hotel, local restaurants and attractions. They were also given wristbands that allowed free access to various amenities and events the hotel held throughout their stay.

Mum and dad had blue wristbands whilst Robbie had a green and white stripy one, which the gorgeous young female receptionist, who smiled and had fastened it on for him, whispered that particular colour was for special guests and got the bearer into the best fun parts of the hotel. They also meant they could access some food – snacks mainly, and drink for ‘free’ throughout the day. Mum and dad’s allowed alcohol in that offer, whilst Robbie’s green and white stripy wristband meant he could have soft drinks and bottled water any time he wanted. It would also give him entry to the kids disco that operated at different times during the week, though he wasn’t told that at the time.

“Here are two keycards for your room. I hope you enjoy everything that The Atlantico offers, please, if you have any questions do not hesitate to ask one of the staff,” said the attractive young receptionist with a smile and wished them a nice stay.

For the first time, in a long time, Robbie blushed – she was so pretty and her sexy ‘foreign’ accent only added to her desirability. As far as he was concerned she’d smiled at him and only him, which must mean she fancied him. His blushing twelve-year-old ego made him forget about his full nappy, although she watched and shook her head from side to side in a telling way as he waddled off to the elevators. She thought what an adorable shy little boy he was, then turned her attention to the next guest booking in.

~

The room was on the twelfth and top floor, it consisted of a living room/dining area with fridge and electric kettle and off to the side a large double bedroom, the bathroom and toilet were off from that. The sofa in the living room pulled out to make a third bed, which Robbie was cheerfully informed would be where he’d be sleeping. He was disappointed that he didn’t have a bedroom to himself; however, the chief selling point was the incredible view. The large balcony would easily fit a family of four, with loungers, and looked down on the pool area, which was packed, and out onto the beautiful blue Atlantic Ocean. He may have been upset about not living in a villa, but this was a premium position and was quite awe-struck. Unfortunately once again, poor Robbie felt an excited and unanticipated spurt of pee enter his already very soaked padded disposable.

“First things first,” Claire said to Thomas, “You unpack, whilst I get Robbie into a fresh nappy... poor guy must be waterlogged.”

He could feel the warmth from his latest unexpected emission and became aware of his full nappy, which oddly he’d completely forgotten he was wearing since seeing the attractive receptionist. However, now he was conscious of it he wanted all this nappying to stop, after all, they were on holiday.

“Mum, dad, please,” he began to plead, “can’t we just call it a day on all this, this stuff...” But mum had already started pulling down his shorts and he’d got so used to her taking charge that he didn’t even try to escape her motherly attention. He knew making a huge fuss wouldn’t get him anywhere but hoped that by complying they would take pity on him. Alas, this wasn’t the time.

“Mum, pleeaaassseeee,” he was begging for some understanding. “I’ve been good, I’ve worn the nappy and crapped and peed in the thing... don’t you think that’s enough now. Can’t we get back to normal? I promise I’ll be good.” He sounded whiney and desperate. “I’ll be that good little boy you want... only please let me out of having to wear any more of these.” He grabbed at the bulging, wet padding.

Taking little notice of his plea Claire pulled down his blue plastic pants and noticed that the disposable was absolutely sodden and still quite warm so knew he’d only just peed in it. She was really quite pleased he’d used it and judging by how much it had absorbed, had done so on a number of occasions. So, despite him not wanting to wear it at the outset of the journey it had proved useful.

“Look love,” she pulled at the tapes, “this looks like it’s saved you from constantly going to the toilet and thankfully everything has been kept where it should be... in your nappy.” She chuckled as she pulled the bulky wet package away and left him all but naked. “Now then, let’s get you wiped and powdered and then you’ll be ready for a little look around this place.”

The total lack of a positive response from mum meant there was little point in pursuing that line of argument but another thought entered his head.

“Erm, errr, can’t we go down to the pool or beach, it’s very hot and we can cool down with a splash about?” Robbie felt the first of many wipes slither over his privates. He knew this was totally embarrassing for a lad of his age to have to suffer such indignity but, his mum was very loving, very encouraging and incredibly gentle. She took her time and made sure every bit of the area was clean.

“Sorry love, I thought the best thing to do first is get our bearings with a bit of a wander around but,” she looked over to her husband, “would you prefer a dip first?”

Thomas looked very sweaty and agreed that a dip was just what he needed and they could wander along the sea front and investigate the resort when the sun dropped and it got a little cooler. So, it was decided, the pool would be the next destination.

~

Excitedly, and with no thought to the fact he was naked from the waist down he dashed over to his case and unzipped it. He was astonished to see none of the things he’d packed were there, not even his black and red baggy surf shorts, which he hoped he’d be spending most of the holiday wearing. Instead, amongst an entirely new set of summer clothes was a pair of blue and yellow neoprene shorts which he’d never seen before.

“Mum,” he looked at her as if she’d just pulled a nasty trick on him, “what the hel..., erm, is all this?”

“Language son,” dad called from the bedroom as he shucked off his suit with relief and retrieved a pair of navy blue thigh length swim shorts.

“Well love, erm, uuummm, I hate to say it but most of the clothes you picked were not very pleasant. Rude words, ghastly images and looked filthy...” Claire shrugged.

“Mum they’re clean it’s just stuff I like,” he looked crestfallen. “Isn’t there anything of mine in here?” He peered disappointingly whilst sorting through what was there. “I can’t wear any of this, it’s, it’s....” he thought ‘juvenile’ but stopped himself from saying so. “It’s not my style.” He was angry and upset but also knew that he had no choice but to put up with whatever his parents had decided.

Ever cheerful Claire smiled as she emptied his case and put all the new clothes on a stack of shelves next to the sofa. It didn’t take long as there wasn’t that much (she had packed a few extra appropriate things in her case as there wasn’t a great deal of room in his because of the parcel of disposables) and it was all neatly packed so she could just slide it all onto the empty shelf or into a large nearby drawer.

“You’ll like what we’ve brought... you’ll be fine sweetheart so don’t worry. Mummy has everything covered.” Robbie’s heart sank.

“Mummy?”  Once again he wasn’t happy about that childish reference but decided it was best not to react, so pretended he hadn’t noticed.

What Robbie didn’t know was that there were only shorts in his mum’s selection and that he’d be looking smart as she deemed he should appear when they went out whether he approved or not.

Despite them being his favourite clothes mum had been of the opinion that no one would want to look at a t-shirt with revolting images or rude words depicted whilst having a nice meal in a restaurant. She was equally sure mums and dads wouldn’t want their young offspring subjected to the same on the beach - so it all had to go. Well, that’s how she justified it to her son but in fact, she’d planned his wardrobe well in advance so knew exactly what he’d be wearing – she was in charge and he didn’t get a say. He was their nappy-clad little boy and would be treated in such an ‘understanding’ way. She was pretty pleased with her choices and thought that there was nothing in her selection he could possibly dislike.

The entire ‘holiday collection’ was loose, colourful, whilst the shorts were in different lengths and materials. She’d packed smart going out shorts like the ones he’s worn on the plane, soft polyester and nylon shorts like he wore for football, as well as lovely cotton shorts that were the same type he played rugby in – so nothing he wasn’t used to wearing. The nappy thickness he would be wearing under them would depend on his behaviour... there were plenty of doubler booster pads in her case should he act up.

The anger he would normally have felt wasn’t there just a sense of inevitability because he knew that was just what he would be dressed in, especially when he noticed the large pack of colourful disposables and plastic pants that took up such a major space in the case. Mum opened the pack and took one out - it was purple.

“I thought a bit of colour for our holiday would make a nice change,” She giggled at the prospect. She hoped he’d be as excited as her but saw him shudder so added. “These will go with most of the stuff we have here,” she nodding in the direction of the shelves, “and I suppose it’ll make a change from the boring fabric, eh?” She was hoping that the new colour would increase Robbie’s appreciation of wearing one but alas, judging by the sigh that escaped him, it didn’t have the desired effect.

“Ohh mum... do I have to... can’t I just wear my swim shorts?”

~ tbc ~

 

Part 6

“Sweetheart, we’ve been through this far too many times. We’ve told you that nappies will stay until we feel you know and understand what you’ve done... and why putting you back in them is necessary.” Again mum was knocking it back to Robbie to acknowledge his part in why he was wearing padding in the first place. “Now your father and I have seen a tremendous improvement from you but, and I have to say this is down to you, you have yet to understand why these are necessary.”

She indicated the pack of disposables, the powder, the anti-rash lotion and the plastic pants she was unloading from the case.

“But mum, dad, please... I don’t know what this is...” Mum just smiled and waved a fresh disposable in the air so he knew that his argument wasn’t going anywhere. He’d put up some resistance and argued his case but, as had happened every time he’d done so, his resolve met nothing but gentle understanding, joyful encouragement and the simple fact he would be wearing a nappy.

His mum gave him a stern look. “We are here to have a lovely holiday for two weeks but, and this is the final time I intend telling you Robbie, you’ll be wearing a nappy until we say otherwise. Any further arguments and I can promise you... that’s all you’ll be allowed to wear for the rest of the vacation.... understand?”

He wasn’t anticipating this level of determination now they were on holiday and expected his mum and dad to be more understanding but this threat knocked him for six.  How could he spend any time in such a lovely and busy place dressed only in a nappy? He could of course simply say “No” and see how far that got him but, and this was what was central to his thought process, he’d already said certain things wouldn’t happen... and yet they had and the proof was his thick padding.

Then there was – THWACK! He was simply scared of being physically hurt and that thought always made him more amenable. He felt defeated but knew nothing he could say would change things... so simply nodded he understood.

“Good boy,” his mum tenderly stroked his arm.

There was no doubt that in the last few days in particular his stridency whilst complaining had diminished to almost negligible amounts. It was just a token spat and one, as always that would make no difference to his underwear regime.

However, there was also another ‘fact’ and that was, as far as his parents were concerned, whilst wearing padding Robbie looked less scary. Perhaps it had never occurred to him (although his mother doubted it) but the clothes he chose before being returned to his padded look made him appear forbidding and aggressive. Now, with his padded bum and the slinky rounded silhouette it offered, plus his delightful if slightly ‘younger’ outfit, he looked like a lovely boy who wasn’t out to enrage.

Since nappies were reinstated Robbie had barely noticed his hostility towards his parents slowly slipping away. Because the extra padding made such a difference movement was more considered. The language he used had softened as had the tone, whilst the clothing he now wore, although it appeared childish, in fact, presented a more acceptable version of him to everyone else. The influence of the gang had diminished, whilst the authority of mum and dad had returned.

He didn’t want to accept any of it but found it hard to refute the simple fact that he had done some bad things that his parents probably knew about. One of the things that made it difficult to protest any stronger these days was the guilt that stopped him from any angry or forceful protest against the situation. Of course he wanted to rebel but the unknown, as well as the anxiety of a nervous twelve-year-old, was keeping him in check. To validate this ‘non-reaction’ he’d visualised that it would all be over any time soon.

THWACK! - Then of course there was always that all pervasive belief (a violent and dreadful belief) that stopped him from being too confrontational.

He may have assumed that as a nearly-teen he’d earned his independence but the simple fact was, he was reliant on his parents for everything. The problem now was - did he spoil the holiday by over-reacting or try and enjoy what was on offer with the restriction he’d have to wear padding the entire time. His choices were limited as he had no money of his own so really needed his parents to provide all things needed whilst away.

This was something else that naïvely he’d simply not thought about. He had a few savings in a bank account but didn’t think about withdrawing any of it so he could spend his money on things he wanted. His parents hadn’t suggested it and it had never occurred to him it might be a good idea. He’d simply become totally reliant on mum and dad to make all the decisions, even if he didn’t agree with them all.

They had more or less already made that decision for him and he could either accept it on their terms or try and negotiate a different outcome, which, on every occasion so far had proved unsuccessful.

~

There had been opportunities. At the beginning his parents had left sheets of paper and pens around for him to list the things he thought he was being punished for. Alas, he’d not taken such an option because he didn’t want to admit to anything in case they didn’t know about it. It was quite the quandary and whilst he continued to mull it over, he had to wear a nappy, which frankly suited his parents much better.

He had apologised for ‘whatever’ it was he’d done a thousand times, except it was all so generic, and as his parents saw it, he hadn’t admitted to any ‘real crimes’. They of course were playing a game of their own choosing and one Robbie hadn’t caught on to at all. They actually had no real idea of the all the things their son had actually done. They just knew, by his attitude, school reports and neighbourly gossip, that he must have been (or was) up to something. They were just pushing his situation to the limit to see what he would eventually confess to and acknowledge his part in; thus, by his own deeds, bringing about his present padded position.

This was quite a fiendish ploy by them, which in all honesty, they weren’t sure they could pull off. The job they thought would be the hardest, to get him into wearing a nappy in the first place, had proved a lot simpler than they had anticipated. Now he was wearing one, and had been for a couple of weeks, there was no doubt that, as far as they were concerned, he behaved much more like the son they envisaged. He may not have been aware of it but his nappy, and the new, more traditional look, gave him a sweet boyish charm that had been absent for the last year or so.

His parents had missed that nice young lad, who’d been usurped by a thoughtless and trouble-making teen, so, in the end had decided to do something radical to change things. They hadn’t realised that his childlike acceptance to wearing a nappy at the start had only been because he thought it would all be over after a couple of days. Conversely, he didn’t realise, once they had him wearing one he wasn’t coming out of it anytime soon. The addition of a nappy to their son’s wardrobe and the complete loss of any underwear alternative, had proved quite successful. There had been no let-up in mum or dad’s insistence he stayed wearing nappies nor any lack of positive comments when he used them. It’s instant benefits made Claire at times wonder if he wasn’t actually far more comfortable wearing a nappy than he let on. She was wrong but it didn’t stop her thinking in such terms.

There had been another threat, a more subtle threat and one that had only recently sunk in. It had been made when Robbie was tearfully coming to terms with his choice of nappying up for the holiday or going to granny’s whilst his parents were away. That was, his conduct on holiday would decide whether he spent the rest of his summer break at granny’s or at home. There was absolutely no way he wanted to be sent to granny’s place for any amount of time.

Granny wasn’t the most awful person in the world but she liked things done her way. She wasn’t the type to indulge her grandson, or anyone else for that matter, so he knew, anytime spent with her would be on her terms. If mum had said that nappies were to be his underwear, then that’s what he’d be wearing... no argument. If that was going to be the case he might as well accept his parent’s decisions and avoid that amount of extra upset.

“Look, we’re here to have a lovely vacation but, as we said right at the beginning Robbie, a nappy is going to be part of the process” She flapped it out. “You also agreed that there would be no more arguments and you’d do as you’re told... are you going back on that promise?”

Robbie realised that if he went back on it that would prove he was untrustworthy and had learned nothing. If he wanted this punishment to end then he’d just have to suffer it until his parents either got tired of it all or, in some magical way, he found out what it was he needed to confess.

He stood and wriggled his body as a tot would trying to make a decision. It was a childish move but one his mother noticed and smiled. He may not have realised it but his actions and reactions to certain situations were getting more childlike.

Nonetheless, his mother was proud of him that at least he was thinking before acting, and thankfully these days, getting that decision right by not arguing. Once wearing a nappy Robbie was less likely to act up as those days had long since gone to be replaced by an acquiescent and well-mannered young man... well, boy actually.

At the back of her mind mum thought, because all this had fallen into place with relative ease, and the furtive look that often passed across his brow, maybe her son had been involved in something he’d rather not discuss or admit to. Was the reason he preferred nappies because to admit to his real ‘crimes’ would be just to shameful? It was a thought.

There was a moment where he and mum were just looking at each other trying to gauge just what the other’s next move might be but dad appeared from the bedroom so it was time to hit the pool. At that same moment Robbie’s mind went where it so often went when deliberating about wearing a nappy.

THWACK!

With dad appearing, and for the briefest of moments, Robbie was terrified because he was arguing, he’d come to deliver those scary slaps that had invaded his head. Thankfully he saw dad was actually looking remarkably cool, younger than normal in his shorts and colourful open shirt and eager for the pool but mum would also need to get ready.

THWACK!

It was like a ‘warning light’ - his brain was reminding him of the consequences if he continued to quarrel so that was a response definitely to be avoided. The ‘danger signal’ wasn’t there all the time but when it did swoop into his head he found it very worrying and real.

“Mum, if I’m going swimming surely I don’t need a disposable as well?” He asked hopefully.

His father nodded to his wife in a rare moment of agreement with his son and in that look it was decided - no disposable.

“Well, I was wondering how that was going to work but... if we agree no nappy whilst swimming then I don’t want you complaining when you will be wearing protection... and that’s at all other times... agreed?” She said with some finality.

A reprise. Robbie was so surprised that he instantly agreed to the rest of what his mother insisted. He wasn’t listening because he couldn’t believe she’d consented; it was a strange euphoria that made him quite giddy.

~

She had been wondering how a nappy under the tight rubber neoprene shorts would work having been assured online that it was possible, surely it would just absorb any water? She also wondered if she might not have been better just bringing his school swimming Speedos or that sweet little pair of nylon trunks with the fish all over them she almost bought. But the decision was made because she understood the neoprene shorts were constructed to hold any incontinence moments. She assumed he’d be able to wear a disposable under them though in reality, that just wasn’t going to be practical. Anyway, the calculation had been made and with the agreement in place that he’ll wear one at all other times, she acquiesced.

Quickly seizing this opportunity Robbie’s brain switched gear and nodded enthusiastically, so simply let mum pull up the ‘weird’ swimwear. It was a new and different material and one he’d never experienced before but the rubber felt awkward compared to the ‘cool’ baggy cotton surfer shorts he had hoped to wear. His mind was on the thought that he’d be spending a great deal of time in just his new swimming trunks so there wouldn’t be any need to wear a nappy. Therefore, hopefully things were more likely to get back to as they used to be as the holiday progressed.

However, it did feel a little strange; after being so long wearing a nappy the cushiony softness was now replaced by a sort of rough rubbery fabric that nudged at his genitals and not in a nice way. Still, he’d make the most of this brief touch of freedom and hope for more concessions further down the track.

There was no denying the fact that his mum thought the new trunks looked cute with their pale blue front, dark blue seat and lovely thick yellow cuffs and waistband (to prevent any loss of faecal matter so she’d been informed). She had thought that would be enough to keep him watertight and a nappy safely dry behind the material but was prepared, on this occasion, to give him this little bit of leeway.

She would be watching him like a hawk to make sure he didn’t slip back into any of his troublesome ways. If he complained at all then he’d be returned to wearing a nappy full time.

There was a bit of tugging and smoothing them out but in the end, although he hated having to wear anything but his own ‘cool’ swim shorts, he was pool ready as he was allowed to be. Whilst it still felt quite bulky and a bit odd, it didn’t look that way as the new rubbery trunks nicely flattered his slim figure.  

Once he was ready mum looked pleased at the result, because they were made for someone younger, having robust cuffs and waistband in different colours but he fitted into them just fine. “There, all set for the pool... you look quite the swimmer sweetheart.” She was going to add her usual warning but instead just smiled her reassurance.

However disappointed he was at wearing another thing that wasn’t his, that thought was overshadowed by the realisation that this was the first time, since that first day of Summer Break, he wasn’t wearing a nappy. He thought (and hoped) that at his age he’d have some independence but all that had been taken away and he was being kept on a tight leash. However, this was a start and one Robbie hoped to capitalise on. His mother thought differently.  

Since the nappies had been introduced he’d hardly done anything without at least one of his parents being around. That’s the way they wanted it to be. Also, the fact that since his nappies started and he’d had his phone taken away and access to games restricted, he wasn’t in communication with any of his mates so had no idea what was going on in their lives either. It seemed that apart from actually feeding him his meals, everything else was supervised... just like a toddler... and wearing a nappy only added to that general sentiment.

~

“Just me now,” mum smiled and did a little curtsy, “I’ll be ready in a jiffy so you guys just find something to do for a few minutes.”

Claire disappeared into their bedroom whilst Robbie and his father ventured out onto the balcony.

“Isn’t this great,” dad said as he admired the panoramic view. “I wasn’t expecting it to be this good but...wow... this is fantastic.”

Robbie couldn’t disagree and saw that down by the pool there were some empty sun loungers.

“Maybe we could grab a couple of those,” he said pointing them out. “The pool looks very inviting, if a little crowded.”

“Well it certainly looks and sounds noisy down there,” dad smiled, “but what’s a holiday for if you can’t scream your head off when you’re excited.”

“Oh dad, you’re not going to scream once in the water are you?” His son gave him a sly look but was he really being giving permission to let himself go.

“Who knows?” He teased looking down at the crowds splashing about below, “it might be too cold... but it does look refreshing.”

“Dad,” Robbie looked like he was going to ask something very important. In fact, he was going to try and convince his father that it was time to put an end to this nappy business but suddenly thought better of it. “You look so much younger wearing shorts.” He smiled when he saw his dad burst into an appreciative chuckle.

Dad knew there had been a swerve in the conversation but was also thankful that Robbie didn’t bring up the subject he was going to. To dad that would have meant, even after the last couple of weeks wearing a nappy, he hadn’t learned anything. He didn’t want to have to remind him that any dissension from wearing nappies meant he’d wear only nappies from that point on. It was a real threat but one he hoped not to have to put it into practice.

He gave his son a reassuring hug.

~

Just before the holiday Thomas had taken Robbie to the barbers and had told the man what cut to give him. Normally, this would have been another incursion into his perceived independence, which initially he would have complained about. But, sitting in the chair, feeling the thick padding under his bum, was correct in assuming that it was not the time or place to cause a fuss. Although it saw the end of his rather messy, thick brown hair, being replaced by a smart shorter, more ‘respectable’ cut, his dad saw it as a sort of bonding ritual, like they had when he was younger.

Back when his son was just starting school he’d taken him to the barbers for his first ‘proper’ haircut and from that moment on, until the last year or so, that had become a sort of tradition, where dad accompanied him to the barbers - often getting their hair cut at the same time.  When he reached eleven and became a ‘senior’ at his school and suddenly got involved with the ‘gang’ all that stopped. That link was broken, much to his dad’s disappointment because it was something just between the two of them, which Thomas regarded as special.

He was so happy when, after the last barber’s visit, that link had been restored and hoped his son felt the same way – a special dad and son moment. Perhaps oddly, despite his initial adverse feelings, Robbie was happy to have this little tradition back – the haircut wasn’t bad either. It was nice to be hugged by his dad and seeing pride in the man’s eyes. Whether either were aware of it or not – it wouldn’t have happened had Robbie not been returned to wearing a nice thick nappy.

Out on the balcony, enjoying the first taste of their holiday, that closeness had not evaporated. Without realising it, Robbie was thriving within the new, re-connected, relationship with his parents. Despite the added protection he didn’t see how much life had improved and although at times the positivity and love seemed to overwhelm him, it was certainly better than the previous months of lies and deceit. He hadn’t comprehended just how anxious those last twelve months or so had made him and it had all been his own doing.

Surprisingly mum was ready in her blue one piece bathing suit, wide-brimmed hat and a light flowery wrap in record time. She also had a huge bag with towels, suntan lotion and other items she might need. Also, wrapped in a special bag was Robbie’s soaked disposable, which she would bin after a word with receptionist as where was best to do so. She would also ask if they had a special bin for the room and was annoyed with herself for not asking when they booked in. Still, there was plenty of time to get that little addition to the room organised.

“C’mon then, let’s get going,” and the trio set off for the lifts to take them down to the pool.

The mood had certainly become joyful and although well aware of the uncool thing he was wearing Robbie didn’t seem overly bothered by his new swimming trunks.

Both mum and dad thought he looked cute and couldn’t resist patting his rubber encased bottom (like they did every time he was changed into a fresh clean nappy) and smiling as he tried not to react but there was no doubt, he was excited now they were at the hotel and about to go for a swim.

The holiday had officially begun.

~

It was early afternoon and the sun had reached the balmy mid-eighties so the pool was a very popular place to cool off. Kids and grown-ups of all shapes and sizes were jumping, running, swimming, screaming, floating - the place was a vibrant arena of colour and noise. There were three pools in total, one of which, a shallow circular pool, was specifically for little kids, which was rammed packed. However, the ‘littles’ were even in the bigger pools wearing inflated arm bands or held up in rubber rings. Some of the smaller kids and babies didn’t look too sure but were being gently encouraged to enjoy the water by parents or older siblings.

Despite his new swimwear, and the really odd feeling of having something missing, Robbie was quite relieved to not be wearing a nappy. He hoped that this little change to his current undies regime would be the start of a more ‘sensible’ approach from his parents, even though he’d agreed to return to the childish underwear once the poolside fun had finished. However, he assumed that if he didn’t ruin the current playful and fun atmosphere being on holiday created, there may be a way back to normal undies without too much delay, or at least he hoped that would be the case. However, the very real sensation that something was missing seemed to puzzle him.

Surprisingly, straight away they found a couple of loungers with an umbrella where they set up shop. Claire reached into her large bag and produced a couple of towels, which she lay out across the plastic. Thomas removed his shirt and, compared to some of the other men his age poolside, although very manly, in comparison looked very pale indeed. However, she was quite proud that, unlike a lot of the other, pink, red and well-tanned men around the pool, he hadn’t got a wobbly belly. Mum took a couple of posed photos of her ‘boys’ with her phone, whilst they tentatively encouraged each other to be the first to jump in.

For Claire, the last few weeks had been quite intense; trying to keep her son wearing nappies, keeping up the appearance of the normality of that situation whilst dealing with the stress that organising a holiday can in itself produce. There was always going to be a bit of tension about how she and Thomas were dealing with things but now settled on a lounger, thought she could relax a little at least.

Those first of many holiday photos joined the countless others she had taken whilst documenting (and continued to record) her son’s progress under his ‘nappy routine’. From those initial weepy eyes and padded bottom and the surprise to find himself wearing a nappy in the first place, to watching him unobserved, as she recorded innocent play with various toys. Of course during the process there had been some tremendous tantrums and arguments but, and this was the main thrust, Claire had seen a remarkable change in her son and one she regarded as positive.

One day, maybe soon (or maybe not), she’ll show Robbie her catalogue of images and videos of how she and her hubby claimed him back. She’d been painstaking in her recording of these developments. Often leaving her phone propped up and just documenting all that happened. Robbie wasn’t aware of what she was doing so it was all ‘natural’. A twelve-year-old wearing a nappy may seem cruel and unnatural but, as she scrutinised some of the more recent photographs, there was undoubtedly a more accepting expression from her boy. A couple of times she’d captured changing his messy nappy and him hardly reacting as she wiped him clean, rubbed in lotion and sprinkled on baby powder before pinning on thick padding and pulling up translucent plastic pants. He’d stand there for a moment whilst she smoothed out the contours and pressed out excess air, then with a final pat on his slinky bottom, off he’d go to play or find something else to occupy his time.

There was definitely something evangelical about Claire’s attitude. The more she pampered and powdered him, the more certain she was that he would come to see just how much good she was doing. Running alongside that there was a strange dichotomy going on in her head, never mind her son’s. She was, at the same time, very protective of his vulnerability but yet liked it if people knew her boy was wearing nappies. Subconsciously (or not), she’d made sure all his clothes, although smart, could reveal what was underneath if he didn’t take care of his posture. Glimpses of his padding as he sat or stood or ran were always a possibility and she was surprised that so few people noticed. Of course she always told him that no one would notice but it continued to fill her with delight when she discovered each unintended childish display.

Before all this it had been difficult for Claire to take the loss of her pre-teen son to others (his gang) or the simple fact he was getting older and drifting away but had been determined to intervene in that. She had become extreme in her efforts to get him back, and not only get him back but have that pride she always felt because he was such a sweet and polite child. As Thomas saw the changes in his son he began to think that nappies had served their purpose so were no longer needed. However, Claire was adamant that it was the simple fact he was back in nappies that had led to this incredible turnaround in their son. She pointed out that despite everything, he’d decided he’d rather wear a nappy then confess to his ‘misdeeds’ and that this form of punishment was getting results so saw no reason to change what they were doing. Her strength of character meant she wasn’t prepared to let go anytime soon and that resolve made her hubby follow her lead.

She was hoping that this holiday would cement his acceptance of the situation once and for all. These days she was less bothered about those ‘crimes’ and ‘anti-social’ things he’d done at school or with his gang – he was now back to being her sweet, adorable boy, and she loved him all the more for being so. She believed wholeheartedly that he would want the things he once had - the unreserved love, the constant attention, the closeness and contact that a genuinely loving family had. She had come to believe (and be obsessed by) what they were doing was for the absolute best and was also certain that he would, given those loving parameters, want the same.

Although at times she’d seen distress in her son’s eyes, she hoped that it was just a process, a way for him to get to the point where she assumed he was now... acquiescence. Alas, she didn’t know that in Robbie’s head there were many things he had to deal with; dread of being found out wearing nappies, the fear of being strapped or physically hurt (THWACK!) and the terror of his real offence being discovered Each and every one were all part of the actual motivation behind his reluctant acceptance of the situation.

Being twelve meant he wasn’t worldly or sophisticated enough to ignore or rationalise many of the dire thoughts that crept into his head. He’d felt grown up and in control when he had the gang around, but now, as things had turned out, not so much. All these things connected and as became clear, although he may not have liked it, wearing a nappy was the least of those problems. In fact, whilst he wore a nappy his parents were attentive and complimentary, although there were various restrictions that meant he couldn’t be a normal lad his age. However, knowing how much his parents cared about him had made a difference. He hated that it had taken him wearing protection to appreciate that point but could see the drift apart had been totally caused by him in the first place. So, that was yet another thing to add to all the other stuff he had to cope with going on in his brain - guilt about not loving and valuing his family enough.

Separately, mum was very positive and had begun to think that she might be able to publish an online article, including photo and video evidence, on how they successfully won their son back from the ‘edge’. Spurred on by similar articles she’d read online from other parents of difficult teens, she was confident others would gain from her family’s experience. Though of the opinion that they were over the worst and from now on it was just a matter of Robbie accepting the current, loving situation, she knew that her job was by no means complete. This part of the process was all very tentative but she did want to know how others would react.

~

Looking over at her two boys (as she mentally called her hubby and son) they looked like they had immediately slipped into ‘fun time’ and were goading each other into getting in the water first.

“Look,” said dad, “there’s a few kiddies floating about... so it can’t be that cold.”

It was true, in fact there were all ages engaged in using the cooling water for a variety of activities. Despite knowing he wanted to keep on the good side of dad the temptation was just too much – so, when he wasn’t looking Robbie stole an opportunity and stealthily crept up behind and pushed him in. It was a most undignified entrance as dad surfaced gasping for air and looking around to find the culprit who’d quite sensibly dived in and was now surfacing at the other side of the pool away from his father’s possible reprisals.

Claire was giggling because she’d seen the whole thing develop and enjoyed the look of surprise her hubby had on his face as he emerged spluttering. She also wondered if the fact he’d not been wearing a nappy had made Robbie a bit more self-confident and thus might be defeating what they’d built up. Or was it just the normal actions of a twelve-year-old boy having fun on holiday?

However, she’d noticed that Robbie was chuckling like a naughty school boy as he pushed dad in but there was no hint of revenge.

She patted her large bag that lay beside her in the full knowledge that there were several disposables ready should she feel that Robbie needed to recommence his nappy routine. He had been warned on more than one occasion in the past and it still applied even here, that if he stepped out of line, she’d change him in full public view.

~

The pool was quite cool but after the heat and sweat of travel came as a welcome relief. The neoprene shorts felt weird and apart from one little kid being held in the kiddie pool by his mother, he was the only one wearing such swimwear. He hoped, amongst the variety of swimwear, it wouldn’t set him too much apart and not make him look like he needed ‘special pants’ to go swimming in. He was also trying to work out how anyone could wear a disposable under the neoprene because it was quite tight.

Just as he was contemplating his predicament another boy around his age swam up and started chatting... in German.

“Erm, sorry, Je ne parle pas... erm...” he realised that speaking French was also no good because that was all he knew. “I don’t speak... ermm”

“Ah Inglish, yes?” The blond boy with amazingly clear blue eyes seemed happy to try out his English.”

“Mmm, yes, sorry...”

Robbie was intrigued as to how a lad from a foreign country could speak English so well, which of course made it easier for him but still... it was a pretty useful ability to have.

“You speak English goothhh,” he said as a wave of cold pool water splashed into his mouth.

He coughed and tried to regain his composure. “I’m Robbie,” he announced, whilst the German boy admitted to Karl.

“As I was saying, you speak English pretty well.” He said as he shivered slightly still getting used to the cool water.

“We learn Inglish at school and most of the music I like is in Inglish so... we learn all the time.” Karl explained with confidence. “I like to speak Inglish.”

“Well, you speak it better than most of the people I know,” He smiled at his attempt at a complement to his new friend. “I’m afraid I only know... well... you heard the little bit of French and even that I wasn’t sure of...”

Karl smiled and asked if Robbie had been to this place before.

“No, this is our first time visiting Portugal, we’re in that room up there.” And pointed out the top floor and where they were staying.

“Your view must be amazing, yes?” Robbie nodded proudly as Karl continued, “We are on the fifth floor but we can see the pool and the palm trees along the beach.”

“Well, it’s just me, mum and dad up there... who are you with?”

“Ah, mutter, farter (Robbie smiled at this pronunciation) and my sister Anna and brotter, erm brother Leo. He’s over there in the little pool in the yellow shorts.”

Robbie searched the kiddie pool where Karl was pointing and noticed a young, very lovely, blonde girl helping a small blond child in billowing yellow shorts, wearing orange armbands learn to swim.

“Is that your sister with him?” He said with more than a hint of desire, which probably wasn’t the correct way to speak about someone on first meeting. “Erm, she looks, erm, ummm, happy.” He was lost for words.

Karl nodded but missed his new friend’s lustful undertone. His sister was a stunning, almost sixteen-year-old, who was fast becoming a beautiful and shapely young woman.

Before he could embarrass himself further Robbie suggested that they swim over to the other side of the pool where there were other boys chucking a ball around and hoping to join in the fun.

As Robbie swam next to his friend his new and slightly uncomfortable rubberised shorts were hiding his youthful, inappropriate and quite involuntary excited shame.

~

He wouldn’t admit to anyone but the same thing happened with the hotel receptionist. However, his thick damp nappy held a well-covered semi-aroused penis awkwardly so it couldn’t react properly. Thankfully, it had only happened a couple of times when his mum had changed him and she took no notice, pushing it down as she pinned him tightly into the fresh padding. Having said that, access with the padding and tight plastic pants had made things difficult when it did happen and he could do very little about it. He was finding the whole, growing up, having urges and wearing a nappy, very frustrating.

Meanwhile, he tried to distract himself by joining in the game but, every time he looked over to the kiddie pool, she was there, looking gorgeous, laughing and splashing around with her little brother. He envied that small boy.

Excitingly, it was almost like they’d been friends for ages as Robbie and Karl got involved with the ever-growing group of like-minded kids chucking a ball around. It reminded Robbie of back being in a gang.

~

The Gang – Throughout his primary schooling Robbie was happy just to plod along. He did quite well in class and loved playing games, especially football and rugby where he was in both school teams. In the final junior year things changed because he became infatuated with one of the school’s ‘bad boys’ Mally.

Because they were in different classes up until that year Robbie and Mally had very little contact with each other. Of course he knew of Mally, everyone did, but oddly, for a school that size, their paths just never seem to have crossed. Mally’s only interest seemed in being a bully and as disruptive as possible, whereas Robbie was engrossed in sport. However, one day, when Year 6 were having lunch, Robbie’s cheese and tomato sandwiches had been smeared with Marmite, something he detested. The problem was down to dad who loved that mix and had that morning been on sandwich-making duty and had forgotten his son’s dislike of such a heady flavour.

As he wasn’t going to eat them, and he didn’t want to throw them away, he simply asked if anyone fancied taking them off his hands. When Mally, who had no food for lunch, heard the call he was quickly in demanding them.

“No, take them you’ll be doing me a favour,” Robbie pushed them towards the school bully. The place had gone silent (like it does in all the best school movies) as this little scene played out. They expected Mally to make a scene and ridicule or threaten Robbie, instead he pulled up a chair and ate the lot. After, and feeling quite full, he nodded to his benefactor and to everyone’s surprise chatted amiably to each other.

Mally, even for such a young lad, was a rough and edgy individual who didn’t make or seek friends, so this was an event that had the entire school watching – from a distance. However, the chat was nothing spectacular but it had caught Robbie unaware and found himself captivated by the impact a lad barely two months older than him had on the rest of the school.

Mally had appreciated the food and the extra juice a beguiled Robbie also let him have, finished their conversation by complimenting Robbie on scoring the goal that had won the school a recent inter-schools game.

“Thanks, but it’s all down to the team.” He demurred casually. “You can’t score a goal without your team.”

Mally eyed him for a few seconds. “Mmmm, you might be right... come and meet my ‘team’.”

After that, they were firm, if unlikely, friends and to Robbie’s surprise he discovered that, by association, he was feared, respected but became eager to prove himself to his new found mates.

It was perhaps unusual for a boy Mally’s age to have such power but, there was no doubt about it, he was looked on with awe by the other kids in the playground and with complete annoyance by the teachers.

That was the start of Robbie’s decline in attitude both in the classroom and at home.

Mally, Iggy and Ponty (from school), later he met Joe, Zeger and Tom (from a different school but the same troubled neighbourhood as the others) none of them were from Robbie’s side of town. In fact, for the most, they thought him a geeky swotty twat but, because of Mally and his leadership in all things, was eventually accepted into the gang but pressured continually to prove himself worthy.

Robbie was totally smitten by Mally but only finally accepted by all when he, as an eleven-year-old schoolboy (and wearing his uniform) faced the ultimate challenge. To the total disbelief of the others he not only accepted the dare but scarily (even for those watching) took it to an exceedingly high level. It was a stupid and reckless thing to do, and not without consequences, which the rest of the gang couldn’t believe. He’d passed the test leaving the small group of twelve-year-olds stunned but alas, not without a guilty conscience that Robbie found difficult to shake off.

The gang knew what he’d ‘accomplished’ but no one else.

“What happens in the gang stays in the gang,” Mally had intimidated.

Ashamedly, and bearing more guilt than any twelve-year-old could be expected to manage, Robbie kept schtum.

~

It was really nice for Robbie to be back mixing with other kids, as for the last couple of weeks wearing a nappy, he’d kept more or less to himself.

Karl was good company and after they’d joined in the game with a bunch of other excited and noisy kids they swam off to chat more about their mutual interest, football. Karl supported his hometown team called Mainz in the Bundesliga, a team Robbie knew nothing about, whilst he was a keen supporter of Liverpool FC, who Karl did know about and said they were his “...favourite Inglish team.” Because of that alone it meant they were already firm friends and again Robbie was impressed by the knowledge his new friend had about the English Premiership.

~

In the meantime, back at the sun-loungers Claire rubbed in some Factor30 into her hubby’s pale skin and left him to relax in the sun whilst she went to reception to ask about a ‘nappy disposable’ bin. Relieved that it was the same girl who’d booked them in, and knowing she spoke pretty good English, Claire tentatively asked if they had such a thing.

“Yes, no problem,” the receptionist smiled, “we can have one taken to your room. It will be there when you return.”

“Oh, thank you, erm, Gracias... sorry... I mean obrigada”

She nodded, “If you need anything please just ask and we’ll do our best,” she spoke in flawless English but with that lovely friendly Portuguese accent. “There is a pharmacy in the next street if you need anything further for you son.”

“Ah, good to know, erm, obrigada again... um... how did you know they were for my son?”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to embarrass you...”

“No, no, no you didn’t embarrass me I just wondered what...”

She indicated around her waist “I noticed his, ummm, fraldas, ummm full nappy? when I fastened his wristband. Sorry.”

“No don’t apologise, he has to wear one so no harm done. While I’m here, what exactly does his wristband allow him to do?”

“Ahh, the green and white means he has access to soft drinks and can attend any Under 12s event – like supervised games time from 10am through to noon every morning in the play area, although it is open all day for them but afraid it’s not supervised then. Or he can attend the Junior Disco for the Under 12s, that’s a fun thing to do. It has volunteers supervising every Monday and Friday usually from 2pm to 4pm but sometimes we run it earlier if there is an event in the evening that needs to be set up. Activities and times are posted daily on the noticeboard”.

She looked behind her and reached for a leaflet with all the information on it.

“Sorry you should have had one of these in your info pack...” she handed it to her, “It gives you all you need to know about the different coloured wristbands and to what they give access.”

Claire wasn’t being dumb, she knew when they booked that they had different tariffs if you wanted All-In, Half Board, Breakfast or Room Only but there were other facilities and activities that were available which could be paid for in advance. That’s where the different coloured wristbands came into use, indicating what you could access without having to explain every time.

“Oh yes, thank, erm thanks, erm, I think we might have this already I just hadn’t got around to reading everything yet... there seems so much to do here.”

“Yes,” the receptionist beamed, “it’s a lovely town and there is Festa tomorrow night down in the old harbour with fireworks, which I’m sure you son will enjoy.”

“Mmmm, a festa... fiesta?” she said taking another proffered leaflet, “I’m sure he will, erm, thank you for these,” and waved the leaflets at her, “and thank, erm, obrigada for organising an extra bin.”

Claire was quite relieved she didn’t have to explain too much about why her twelve-year-old son was wearing a nappy but was strangely pleased that the receptionist had noticed. The disposable she’d just got rid of was in fact very full and wondered if the poor girl had caught an unintended whiff of his pee when she’d fastened the wristband on but was too polite to mention it. She was pleased that she remembered that obrigada was Portuguese for ‘thanks’ but it was also the only Portuguese word she knew.

She also wondered if the girl had thought Robbie was under ten, which tickled her a bit but wasn’t going to dissuade her if she did. She intended for him to enjoy ALL the facilities that the Atlantico had to offer and that included the supervised games and play area.

Since returning Robbie to nappies Claire’s mind (and not for the first time) had gone in a slightly different direction. Of course she thought hubby and her were doing the right thing but also saw it as the opportunity for a new start. Her head had been filled with a multitude of possibilities, which would slide into her deliberations and become the main inspiration, only for it to be replaced by what could be an even better one. She hoped that whichever one (or two or three) she settled on would be to everyone’s benefit.

In the last couple of weeks, and perhaps unintentionally, she’d thought of Robbie as much younger than his real age. Because of his juvenile padding it had happened almost organically - that having her son thought of as younger than he actually was made her feel younger herself. None of this had been in their plans and although Thomas was unaware of his wife’s current frame of mind, it made her smile as a she slipped effortlessly into that role of appearing to be a ‘young mother’.

The receptionist smiled warmly as Claire, with a spring in her step, headed back to the pool. As she sauntered through the large marble atrium she wondered if the girl was the only one who’d noticed Robbie’s padding or if there were others who’d observed the smartly dressed young English boy arrive packing padding?

There was a ‘help yourself’ kiosk offering cool drinks just inside the large glass doors of reception and thought it would be a good idea to grab a few bottles of water and juice on their way back up to their room. She took a quick peek and was delighted at the selection on offer.

Making it back to poolside with her head full of these considerations she found Thomas fast asleep on the lounger but their son nowhere to be seen.

# tbc #

 

Part 7

For a moment a sense of panic and dread entered her mind as she scanned the noisy pool. Where was he? Where had he gone? What could have happened to...? Ah, there he was at the far side of the pool jumping out of the water to catch a ball being tossed around by a group of kids. Among all the others, the yellow cuffs on his shorts making him easily identifiable. Phew! It was a shock just how intense the feeling of panic, no matter how brief, had hit her.  

It was at that moment that the family they had talked to on the bus ride from the airport asked if the empty loungers near them were taken. A smile from Claire soon had mum, dad and their young son, Darren (she seemed to remember) setting up shop next to them.

“Mum can I go in the pool?” the youngster asked timidly.

“Not just now love, I’ve just doused you in suntan lotion... I should have thought. Have a bit of a sit first and then...”

Darren, wearing shiny blue swimming trunks that probably fitted him a couple of years ago but the poor boy spilled out of now stood around wondering what to do next.

“Can I go and explore then...?” he shrugged hopefully.

“Yes, yes of course, just remember where we are when you want to come back... and don’t go out of the hotel... and be careful...”

But Darren was off without another word to see what the Atlantico had to offer.

“He’s such a handful at his age.”

She looked across at Claire who’d watched this little bit of theatre as they settled themselves, whilst arranging various towels and cushions and passing observations on the chaotic activity around the pool.

Eventually the woman settled with a sigh and her hubby took the lead.

“I’ll go and get us a drink... erm... sorry, I’ve forgotten your name,” her husband apologised as he finally acknowledged their new neighbour.

“Claire and this,” she pointed her thumb towards her recumbent husband, is Thomas... over there, somewhere is Robbie.” She flapped her hand in the direction of the raucous pool.

The man reached out his hand to shake Claire’s “John, Amanda and Darren...” he waved his hand to encompass his small family. “Carpenter... Can I get you anything whilst I’m at the bar?”

“No thanks we’re fine,” she patted the large bag by her side.

“OK then, G&T for you love?” He asked but already knew the answer and was on his way. He was about the same height as Thomas but carrying quite few extra pounds, Amanda was the same but her extra weight made her look curvy rather than fat and Claire had to admit looked very good in her blue and white one piece swimsuit.

“Isn’t this a fantastic hotel...?” and so the conversation started between two mums who would, in next to no time, know all there was to know about each other... except Robbie’s nappies. That info, for the moment at least, was on a need to know basis. Of course, if she’d noticed and asked about it then Claire would happily tell the tale.

Later, as the conversation between the two women progressed Claire was most interested to know that Amanda homeschooled her eight-year-old son because the school where they lived was rough and had a terrible reputation.

“I couldn’t let a sensitive boy like Darren be part of all that. Besides, what I thought might be a huge problem was anything but... I enjoy teaching him and I’m sure he’s a better person for it.” Amanda added confidently.

This was something Claire hadn’t thought about before and it intrigued her, so encouraged her new friend to explain how it all worked. She was surprised to find that it was so easy and that you didn’t have to follow a particular curriculum. Amanda couldn’t speak highly enough of the relief it had given her to make that break from normal schooling. However, she did point out, that she made sure Darren stuck to a strict regime and was not allowed to dress as he pleased doing lessons. She had imposed her own boundaries and rules, which included him wearing a sort of uniform. In other words he wasn’t permitted to lie around in his pyjamas all day.

“I’m not too strict with him but I want him to know that when he’s in lessons he’s there to learn. Thankfully, he’s such a good boy he’s been absolutely no trouble whatsoever.”

As Amanda rubbed in more Factor30 into her rapidly glowing skin Claire was riveted with what she had to say.

“Yes, I just let the school know I’d be doing any schooling from that moment on, went on line and found a couple of other homeschoolers who had kids around Darren’s age and now we have a little group that meet up so he still has access to friends. It’s working incredibly well and I have my little boy at home with me... so that’s wonderful.”

It was a ‘light bulb’ moment. Claire thought how ridiculous it was that she hadn’t thought about it herself. In a twinkling she had the answer to what was going to happen once the new school term started. It was like a warm feeling of relief flowed through her (and not because of the Portuguese weather) but the immediate future that she’d worried about now had a solution - she’d have her little nappy-clad boy at home with her, away from the influences of those troublesome schoolmates. Now she had something positive in mind, she could see it working though needed to convince Thomas it was the brilliant remedy to keeping Robbie safe.

~

Amanda was on her third G&T as the shadows started creeping across the pool area and some people were making their way back to their rooms. Darren had returned and his mum had let him go off for a splash around as long as his father joined him, which he reluctantly did. Amanda had got her husband, as well as her son, very well trained. Meanwhile, Thomas, thanks to the early start, had been catching up on sleep after his dip and had dozed happily under the shade of a large umbrella. In the interim, Claire had gleaned as much info as she could and at one point had unintentionally agreed for Robbie to accompany Darren to one of the kid’s discos the lonely lad was desperate to attend.

Although focused on what her new friend had to say Claire was keeping a watchful eye on Robbie who also seemed to have made a new friend. The new boy was in her opinion ‘quite gorgeous’ with his blond hair and just developing physique. Although Robbie was trim and athletic in truth he wasn’t quite as muscular, in a growing boy type of way, as the boy he’d teamed up with.

At the back of her mind was the fact that she knew, whilst at the hotel, he’d make friends but would keep a very strict eye on just who he ended up with. She had hoped that by keeping him wearing a nappy he’d be more reluctant to stray too far away from her and Thomas. Having said that, she wanted to encourage him to socialise but would be wearing his padding, and although he wasn’t at that moment, he would be once out of his swimming trunks. She was hoping that letting him out of them for swimming she hadn’t made a huge mistake... time would tell. 

~

It hadn’t taken Robbie long to realise just how much he’d missed mixing with other lads his age. The noise, the enthusiasm for just chucking a ball around, had them all developing tactics but still laughing as water splashed up and over them. It had been quite some time since he’d had so much fun, he couldn’t say the things he’d done with Mally and the other lads was fun, but this was definitely better.

There were kids and adults everywhere and much to his annoyance there was an old tubby man in a pair of baggy red shorts exactly the same as the ones Robbie’d packed. Firstly he thought how awful they looked on him but then realised his mum had, in her own way, saved him from what would have been total embarrassment had they clashed at the poolside.

The entire pool was a cacophony of excited, colourful people of all shapes and sizes. Some with inflatables, some looking red and very sunburnt, whilst others simply gently swam from one end to the other at their own pace. Other aquatic diversions were happening everywhere and it was easy to become involved in them as they kept overlapping. However, over the screeching mob Robbie heard the only word that penetrated the tumble of noise.

He returned his attention back to what Karl was talking about – football. So, they swam away from the game, which to some degree the entire pool appeared to be involved with and settled in the shallow end discussing the merits of their favourite teams. It turned out the Karl also played football for his school team, which once again had Robbie convinced they had a surprising connection.  

At one point Anna, Karl’s sister, walked past with her little brother holding her hand and said something in German that Robbie didn’t understand “...ich werde gerade Leos Windel wechseln...” and something else but had no idea what it referred to.

Karl simply nodded and replied in his own language then carried on speaking to Robbie in English as if there hadn’t been any German spoken to break up their conversation. He marvelled at his mate’s ability to switch languages so easily. Robbie felt guilty (and a stirring in his neoprene trunks) as Anna’s shapely figure gently guided her little brother to wherever they were going. He hoped he’d get to meet her but wondered if she would speak English as well as her brother. He had no way to communicate with her if she didn’t. He was also a bit nervous about asking Karl if he’d introduce them... maybe later.

Karl looked up and saw his father calling him from the other side of the pool and said, as it was getting late, that he had to go to get ready for dinner. Robbie had no idea just how long he’d been chatting in the water but was suddenly aware of the shadow from the hotel that covered most of the pool. The temperature hadn’t dropped significantly, as he was half-submerged in the water, but noticed a few of those still around the pool, which had emptied considerably, clutching towels tightly to their bodies.

As Karl heaved himself out of the pool Robbie couldn’t help but notice as the sun caught his tight wet blue nylon swimming trunks and the sheen that seemed to add shape to a perfect bum. The notion shocked him as it was something he’d never thought of before but then wondered if this was all part of growing up. He admired his new friend so why wouldn’t he notice such a thing? He’d already noticed his sister so... erm... he might have to stay in the water a little longer and hope things in his trunks calmed down.

As he stood in the pool watching Karl confidently make his way over to his parents to grab a towel he couldn’t help but notice that the water around his waist was nice and warm. It took him a few seconds to realise he’d just peed himself, which in turn gave way to an involuntary shiver that ran through his body. Perhaps it was time to return to the sun-loungers.e admired

~

Amanda and her family had gone so the lounger next to Claire and Thomas was free. In a quiet moment mum had filled her bag with several bottles from the kiosk she’d spied earlier. Thomas had woken quite refreshed and was sipping appreciatively on a cool bottle of water, whilst Claire was holding one out to her son as he approached. Thanking her he sat down heavily on the plastic lounger but it didn’t feel right. Without the usual padding it hadn’t seemed ‘right’ when they set off from their room but this new sensation was distinct and it took a few seconds for him to realise what had happened.

Just as he became acquainted with the truth his mother asked if he was okay but a sudden smell emanating from his vicinity told her what the problem was.

“Oh dear sweetheart have you had an accident?”

The accuracy of her observation was just too much for Robbie; he’d been able to act like a normal twelve-year-old boy since arriving at the pool but now he knew that had disappeared and he was just a messy little kid who couldn’t keep his pants (trunks in this case) clean. Not only that but he recalled letting out a little fart once Karl had departed but hadn’t realised he’d ‘followed through’. This was such a babyish thing to have happened and therefore a huge hit to his hoped for teenage status.

There were tears forming but Claire was quickly in “Don’t worry love, these things happen... and by the looks of your red face and shoulders... you may well have had a bit too much sun all in one go. You might have got a bit of sunstroke...”

Despite her reassuring words Robbie felt revolted. Even though he was used to filling his nappy this was unlike any other experience so was simply too ashamed to do or say anything but nod.

Mum, already deciding that his nappy needed urgently reinstating, indicated it was time they went back up to their room. Thomas helped pack stuff into his wife’s large bag and carried it as she put her arm around her son’s shoulders and slowly headed out of the pool area and back to the privacy of their accommodation.

Should anyone be watching, Robbie’s uneasy bow-legged waddle a dead giveaway of what lay in the seat of his damp neoprene trunks. Thankfully, the lift up to the top floor was only occupied by the three of them so no one else had to suffer the earthy odour that hung around them like a slightly noxious cloud.

~

Of course he’d sat in a messy nappy before but the mush now spread around his bum cheeks felt as if he’d let everyone down. The fact that both his mum and dad didn’t think anything was wrong, in fact, were nothing but supportive, seemed to make the situation worse. His hours of being ‘normal’ and not having to wear a nappy lay heavily in the seat of his trunks. He suspected they thought of him as a silly little toddler who had no control and yet, they both continued with things as if it was nothing unusual and maintained their unconditional love and support.

Once through their apartment door Robbie burst into huge sobs and did all he could to apologise for what his mum would now have to deal with.

“Don’t upset yourself love, it’s nothing we can’t cope with so don’t you worry yourself... and sweetheart... there’s no reason to cry. We’ll soon have you all clean and tidied up...”

Claire felt a little guilty that she hadn’t insisted he wore a nappy under his trunks, as that had been the initial plan, and hoped this accident hadn’t contaminated the pool in some way. However, from her preliminary check, all seemed reasonably well contained. She continued with her words of support and steered him into the bathroom, whilst indicating to her hubby to get a fresh nappy, and the other items needed, to put their boy back in secure protection.

“Oh, and can you please put the bottles I have in my bag in the fridge?”

Thomas just nodded; he didn’t want to make a big thing about his son having such an accident so the diversion was welcome. He was surprised just how much stuff, as well as the bottles and disposables, was in her bag but there again, his wife was always well prepared.

Claire also noticed the extra new bin at the side of the toilet which the receptionist had promised would be there; she was impressed with the hotel’s efficiency. It wasn’t needed in the present circumstances but was glad to know that his future requirements for disposable disposal was in place.

There was no doubt that what had happened had stunned Robbie as he stood there passively and let his mum see to everything. She slowly pulled down his trunks and saw that not only was there poo but also at some point he’d got excited and left other ‘emissions’. Of course this wasn’t too much of a shock as she’d dealt with such visible signs her boy was growing up before but wondered who had caused it or was it just the wearing of his trunks that had stimulated such a reaction? She’d noticed the same thing in his nappy on occasions and wondered if they had had the same effect. She’d read on line that this could be a possibility but not to draw too much attention to it as it was a natural function of a growing boy’s body as much as peeing and pooing. Of course she had hoped that his new found innocence would also mean a lack of arousal. Claire had to remind herself that despite what she imagined, her son was getting older and therefore would have urges, she just hoped that keeping him in thick nappies and treating him like a kid might just hold back that inevitable tide – she had him how she wanted him and didn’t want to think any further ahead.

~

Once she’d cleaned him up and washed out his messy trunks she covered him in Aftersun lotion because his face and shoulders were glowing red. Once that was done she shuffled him naked into the living area where dad had laid out the changing mat on the sofa, plus an array of items to wrap him in.

Over the last few weeks Robbie had to quickly get used to being naked around his parents so didn’t think anything about his current state of undress. Quite often his mother would make sure every little crease and crevice was spotless and dry before fitting him to whatever padding she’d chosen. Meanwhile, he’d begun to sprout a little hair down there but she’d found a cream to get rid of that. Sometimes this operation could take a while as she fussed and powdered around his nappy area. Thankfully, Robbie had soon lost his initial embarrassment as she paid no attention to his ‘growing’ problem when intimately applying various creams and lotions. When that happened she was quick to cover the offending object in very thick, and tightly fastened, terry cloth. 

However, at seeing he was going to be put back into a disposable he baulked slightly, though mum simply reminded, with a light tap on his bare bottom, that he’d just messed himself so there was to be no argument.

She checked her hubby was ready as she took the wet trunks out onto the balcony and pinned them on the small washing line to dry out overnight.

Reluctantly, but without too much resistance once laid out, dad set about spreading on lotion and powdering his son before fixing a nice thick blue disposable with an extra soaker pad. Like mum, dad always did a really good job of making sure it fit perfectly before pulling up a pair of thick clear plastic pants. He tucked everything in and smoothed the entire thing out making it so that the glossy cover held it all fast. There was no doubt that the hefty disposable and tight cover with thick waist and leg bands gave him the look of a big incontinent toddler. However, both parents were in agreement that these days, after the positive changes in his behaviour, it didn’t seem inappropriate that even at his age, it’s just what was needed.

“There you go Robbie,” dad patted his freshly cushioned bum, “let’s go out on to the balcony whilst mum gets changed.

Although this sort of intense interaction was nothing new for him Robbie felt a bit glum but realised that he couldn’t really object after what had just happened in the pool - besides, as always, both parents had been most supportive. Dad hadn’t offered him anything else to wear so nervously shuffled his way back outside and into the pleasantly warm air. The thing was, after the neoprene shorts, this fresh disposable felt quite comfortable as he sat down and dad engaged him in small talk about his day. This was something else he liked about dad, he still spoke to him like nothing weird had happened, like he used to do before, well, before he met Mally and his mates. He soon relaxed, not only that but the air was filled with pleasant distant chatter and laughter, whilst aromas of exotic evening meals being prepared filtered up to the top floor and added a further holiday vibe to the incredible views.  

There was no doubt that they had one of the best panoramas because of the glass balustrade around the balcony that offered an almost unrestricted outlook. The hotel was shaped so that no balcony was overlooked, which pleased Robbie as he didn’t feel exposed. He and dad watched while people were returning from the beach and scrutinised the last few die-hards who fled the pool as the final shadows engulfed the entire area. It was amazing how quickly the last bit of sun-drenched pool emptied when that happened, except for one little lad who was in the kiddie pool and happily splashing about now he had it to himself.

Meanwhile, as they got comfy on their balcony dad was of the opinion that there would no doubt be a very picturesque sunset. Though for the moment, that was out of sight behind where they sat. Still it was all quite awe-inspiring and had the promise of a special vantage point for sunrise the following day.

For the time being, Robbie’s sleek well-padded snug underwear made sitting around very comfy. He shivered slightly, possibly because his chest and shoulders were bare and had had a little bit too much sun so needed a t-shirt, which dad raided one of the shelves to get for him. It was a short green onesie with small metal press-studs under the crotch for easy release or access. Dad didn’t know about these but realised that Claire wouldn’t have brought them unless she thought them necessary and despite a small amount of reluctance from Robbie, soon had it on. There was no doubt that this short onesie did make him look even younger but there was also the added guard that it would, should the occasion occur, prevent a ‘full’ nappy from too much sag.

Claire had been most adamant (and very persuasive) that she was going to be in charge of what their son should and would wear (and of course that meant the starter nappies to remind him he was still only a child). She’d told Thomas that it was age appropriate (but hadn’t said the age she was aiming at) but he had to agree that, despite the initial furore from Robbie, everything seemed to be working. Whether she meant it to or not the boy’s attire, coupled with his slightly anxious demeanour, made him look, as dad remembered those times, like a cute eight-year-old.

“Well, it looks like you managed to get quite a bit of sun... we might have to be a bit more careful tomorrow and keep those shoulders covered. What else have you been up to today?”

Eventually Robbie revealed he’d made a new friend, Karl, and was soon chatting enthusiastically about him, the games they played and the hotel in general.

Dad had discovered that if he could distract his son and involve him in what was going on in some way, he tended to forget he was wearing thick protection. Not only that, but if he could ‘normalise’ the situation as much as possible, he appeared quite relaxed about it as well. He couldn’t deny just how quickly his son had turned from an absolute horror to be around to his current state. It was reining in all those bad habits and attitudes and although he may have looked, and sometimes acted, like a big kid, he’d decided like his wife, that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. If the insisted upon thick and shiny protection was what it took, then so be it, he was still his son and he loved him.   

On the other hand, when wearing a nappy, his wife liked that Robbie was aware he was his ‘mummy’s sweet little boy’ and wanted him to know the way she was treating him was for the best. Despite these slightly different approaches, it was agreed that his temperament had changed for the better and it was without doubt all down to him being forced into wearing nappies. He’d be reminded of the fact it was as a punishment he’d brought on himself if he acted up but these days any such outbursts were kept relatively in check.

~

The first day of the holiday had been a combination of highs and lows for Robbie. There were things he thought were perhaps over but then something rapidly returned him to things as they are. He’d been made to wear clothes that he thought he never would but surprisingly, once in them, had found them tolerable and probably right for the climate. He’d also worn a thick and soaked disposable for ages without too much discomfort, in fact, he rarely noticed now. The Villa he’d hoped for was a nonstarter but the hotel was large and lively. He’d made a friend and admired several fit looking girls who had, without being aware, given him an unexpected outcome. Indeed, there were many in the pool he’d ‘spoken’ to or nodded at or smiled and laughed with, so expected to have a really great time over the next two weeks.

Then his little mishap had come as a huge shock and had knocked his confidence. So, it was back to where he started, sitting around having a chit-chat with dad, whilst wearing a very thick and slinky piece of underwear, as if he'd never been out of them. He’d not been able to persuade dad that he didn’t need nappies and had given up hope that either parent would change their minds even on holiday.

It seemed weird that only a few weeks ago this would have never happened. The idea of wearing thick protection had never arisen, nor would it have been suggested, nor would it have crossed his mind he’d ever wear such an item. The anger at the suggestion, followed by the inevitability of the outcome, had been unexpected. He certainly hadn’t thought just how much guilt he’d been carrying and that had somehow funnelled into his ultimate, if reluctant, compliance.

The padding, although difficult to comprehend to begin with, was proving to be both comfy, and now after the pool accident, quite reassuring. He’d quickly got used to its bulky presence just as mum had said he would. However the consequence of wearing protection, even after a relatively short time (and he may not have been conscious of the fact), was just how often he’d come to use its convenience. Of course, from the very start his parents had insisted he did so but... well... as mum had noted... he was beginning to need a change more and more often.

~

Claire arrived back on the balcony, hair done, make-up in place and looking very summery in a nice flowery cotton dress and with a thin white cardigan draped over her shoulders. The two ‘boys’ in her life were having quite a laugh at some little game they’d invented about where the boats out at sea were heading.

As always she was struck by just how sweet and cuddly Robbie looked once well-wrapped up in a nappy and now, with the unexpected addition of his onesie, he was playing the part to perfection. Seeing him standing next to his dad, not even thinking about his underwear and pointing out things on the horizon to each other, all so natural, filled her with happiness. There was no doubt that his robust padding made him appear so much younger and unsophisticated. Whereas the shimmering hint of plastic firmly stretched over the thick disposable just invited to be patted and stroked; her son had never looked so endearing.

Click. Another shot on her mobile for her rapidly growing photographic archive.

“Okay,” she smiled at hubby, “if you like you can get ready now and then we’ll go for that walk along the front.”

“Okay love, won’t be a minute.” Thomas ruffled his son’s hair as he made for the bedroom.

“Right, I suppose we’d better get you dressed as well,” she beamed, although planned on only slipping him into a pair of shorts and shirt.

With the thin, fabric onesie stretched over the blue disposable it could be seen through the clear plastic cover. All seemed dry but she still checked by sliding her fingers up the leg of his plastic pants. Now used to such treatment Robbie didn’t try to stop her or move away.

“Well done love,” she smiled approvingly, “nice and dry.” She kissed him on his head and then skimmed through the shelf with his shorts until she saw some that would match. Holding up what appeared to be a pair of dark green rugby shorts, but with an elasticated waist, she told him to put them on.

“Mum, aren’t these bit too short for... you know... going out in?”

“Nonsense sweetheart, you wear this style all the time at home... you’ll be fine... although you might need a shirt to put on over your t-shirt as the temperature might drop.”

However, with the shorts hanging from her fingers he understood there was no chance she’d change her mind so didn’t put up any resistance and slipped on what was offered. He was correct, they were quite short and his disposable filled them out slightly. It would be an effort to hide the smooth padded lines, although, when he stood up straight, it didn’t look too bad at all. She passed him a purple, button-down collared shirt, which he didn’t mind and fastened that up. It hung outside his shorts and covered them up slightly. He checked in the mirror – “Yes”, he thought, he could get away with this particular look.

~

Whilst they waited for dad to get changed mum brought out a couple of juices onto the balcony and handed one to Robbie. He’d sat down and she noticed and appreciated the nice tight bulge his shorts made and could see up the leg which revealed a glimpse of his shiny plastic pants with the robust, thick anti-leak guard. She didn’t mention any of this but chatted about the nice family she’d got to speak to who came to sit next to them. She asked if he remembered them from the coach trip to the hotel reminding Robbie of their young son, eight-year-old Darren. She was toying with mentioning the possibility of homeschooling but thought better of it, well, at least until she’d spoken to Thomas.

The sound of a splash and a huge guffaw of laughter from below had Robbie up and staring down at the pool where a bunch of people were doubled up whilst helping some poor person who, fully clothed, had ended up splashing around and gasping for breath.

“Someone’s evening has got off to a bad start,” mum remarked as she joined him from their vantage point. Both had huge, and not, sympathetic grins on their faces as they watched the poor soaked guy being helped to his dripping feet.

A nice cooling breeze ruffled Claire’s dress as she put her arm around her son’s shoulder and gave him a tender hug. He gave a little flinch but not because he didn’t want to be hugged, it was the slight sunburn on his shoulders.

“Oh, sorry love, I forgot... we’ll have to keep an eye on that in future, we don’t want you to end up all burnt to a crisp now do we?”

He grimaced back and shrugged “Sorry, I know you told me to be careful but I just didn’t feel the heat whilst in the water...”

“Well, hopefully we’ve caught it in time and the cream I’ve applied should cool things down a bit... but we should definitely keep you covered tomorrow to be on the safe side.”

Although Robbie hoped to be in the pool or beach the following day it looked like they’d be out doing other things. His mother moved her arm to around his waist and gave him another hug, which was a lot nicer.

“Isn’t this just a wonderful place.” She was gazing out to sea, well, the Atlantic Ocean actually, and saw little lights appearing on the small fishing boats taking up their positions for the night. Down below, although it wasn’t anywhere near dark, fairy lights lit up the trees that surrounded the pool giving it a most magical appearance.

Yes, up there on the top floor, everything was just about perfect.

~

The Atlantico was set at the far end of the seafront along which ran a wide causeway that followed the coastline then down to the old harbour about a mile away. The Davison Family joined several others as they sauntered along, marvelling at just how picturesque the place was and the immaculate sandy beach. As they walked away from the hotel not only did the path get busier but more shops, restaurants, bars and the like showed just what an active and popular resort this was.

Mum and dad walked arm-in-arm, whilst Robbie wandered just a few feet in front of them, occasionally stepping back so as not to get separated when the crowds got thicker. The temperature had dropped a little but it was still warm enough; the cool breeze they felt on their balcony not transferring itself to sea level where the air was thick with the buzz of a tourist town gearing up and getting into full evening swing.

At either end of the beach there were dramatic rock formations that in the daytime added to the area’s picturesque quality. Now some aspects were lit by floodlights and looked quite striking against the rapidly darkening sky. Mum posed her two ‘boys’ and took several shots on her phone – dad with his arm around his son and Robbie sitting on a rock smiling cheerfully at the camera. He didn’t know it but the flash of the camera had reflected on the shiny plastic that could be seen down the leg of his shorts. The fact that he didn’t seem concerned and hadn’t fussed while posing was a bonus to mum. With his shirt out and covering most of his bum he seemed very relaxed, even with the slight little waddle he’d adopted because of the bulk, though perhaps he hadn’t noticed that either. Mum was desperate that this trip would solidify Robbie’s acceptance for wearing a nappy and thereby she could keep control over his behaviour. So far, so good.

~

After wandering the seafront and a few of the backstreets for an hour or so Thomas asked if they were hungry, the answer was that they were all starving so were on the lookout for a nice local, family run restaurant.

Três Irmãos, slightly off the main thoroughfare, was up a hill but looked to have a terrific view across the streets below and out into the ocean. It was large enough and had tables outside as well as ample seating inside and a quick perusal of the menu (and prices) the decision was made to try it for their first ‘foreign’ meal of the holiday. The fact that it was so busy was a fair indication that it had a good reputation. 

The friendly waiter asked them to wait just a moment whilst he cleared a table that had just been vacated. They hoped he wouldn’t take long because they just taken a look in the chilled display cabinet and decided on the gloriously large prawns that lay invitingly on view.

Two minutes later and the waiter returned and led them to their freshly laid table, with glasses and cutlery all set out and a small vase with a local flower as a cute central display. They couldn’t believe their luck that they had a prime spot with tremendous views. The only thing that made both Claire and Thomas smile was that at one of the available places, and obviously set out for Robbie, was a place mat with a cartoon character to fill in. A selection of crayons and coloured pencils were stood in a small metal cup. Two large menus were set at the two places with glasses, whereas a colourful list of food for kids who might like a simpler fair was given to Robbie.

Robbie was incensed, he wasn’t a little kid and didn’t like being treated as one.

“It’s a family orientated restaurant Robbie” Dad couldn’t hide the huge, amused grin on his face. “They try to engage with everyone not just the adults... but perhaps the colouring placemat is a bit too much.”

“How dare they assume,” Robbie began to argue, but the laughter from mum and dad quickly brought him round and grudgingly saw the ‘funny’ side.

His dad said that he could use his menu if he wanted to try something different but knew that both he and Claire were salivating at the prospect of locally caught fresh prawns. Robbie wasn’t keen on fish, or anything fiddly or with bones but didn’t find he liked much on dad’s menu and wished he hadn’t been so keen on sending the Kiddie Menu away with the waiter just moments earlier.

Dad called the waiter over, apologised for being a nuisance, and asked if he’d be so kind as to return the earlier menu. The man had a really nice smile and quickly went off to get it and the drinks Thomas had ordered at the same time.

Although embarrassed Robbie thought the selection and choices of meals on his revisited menu was far better than anything on the ‘grown-up’ one.

The view from their seats was terrific. From Robbie’s vantage point he could see further along the road and noticed flashing lights that had, in English, the word SLOTS, which indicated machines and other entertainment might be on offer should they venture in that direction after eating. He could see quite a few young people going in and out and hoped they could go there after the meal.

Eventually the order was made and delivered, mum and dad having four large prawns each, which needed peeling but looked smooth and succulent as they were doused in garlic butter. Robbie could do without that type of mess so had settled on chicken strips with chips, salad and a large Coca Cola, which because he was so hungry devoured the lot with relish.

Their table was very near the pavement so passers-by were taking an interest in what they were having. Several people stood and looked, others simply sauntered by or, with a friendly smile, acknowledged the family. Robbie didn’t know it but his shorts had ridden up and some of those passing saw the bulk of his nice gleaming protection sticking out. This was partly due to his short shorts but mainly because he’d suddenly found himself bursting for relief. So, doing as he’d been instructed, surreptitiously filled the disposable during dinner. The release and warmth were surprisingly both quite satisfying. He didn’t want to bring what he’d done to his parents attention as they seemed to be enjoying their meal so thought a change could wait until they returned to the hotel. Nor did he fancy being escorted to the toilets and his mum changing him there. So he sat innocently idly doodling with the crayons on his picture. A couple of kids who passed giggled to each other and looked back but Robbie wasn’t looking. He had no idea he was the cause of amusement in some quarters.

~

By the time mum and dad had finished their meal, emptied the bottle of chilled white wine and paid the bill Robbie was desperate to aim for the SLOTS place to see what was on offer. As they left the restaurant with many “obrigada” “thanks” and praise for a much enjoyed meal, their son was halfway down the road and heading towards those flashing and inviting lights.

Jogos e caça-níqueis was quite a large, noisy and colourful building with loads of machines offering an array of slot-machines and games. The place seemed to cater to all manner of ages, with tourists and locals speaking in various languages teaming around sampling what was inviting them to part with their money. At the back was an ‘age restricted area’ where an automatic Roulette wheel was very popular. Apart from the occasional slot machine all the big video games testing skill were occupied and appeared to have enthusiastic support teams surrounding them. Bings and pings, rattles and the occasional sound of winnings being deposited in metal drawers made it perhaps one of the liveliest places in the area.

Robbie was eager to join in the fun and begged his dad to let him have some money so he could go off to play. Neither Claire or Thomas were interested but, as there was a popular little café attached decided to let him loose and, after giving him €20, told him that’s where they’d be having a coffee when he’d spent up.

Since he’d lost his console ‘privileges’ at home, it had been ages since he’d been allowed to play any video games and he couldn’t wait to immerse himself in something that he used to enjoy so much. He wandered around trying to find a console he knew or looked interesting in the ‘unrestricted’ area but the place was packed and finding anything unoccupied difficult. He changed the €20 bill into single €1 coins but found himself quite engrossed in watching a couple of young lads, wearing knee length beach shorts, as they battled some Alien Predator. The lad playing was being wildly cheered on by his mate and even in the language they were speaking, which wasn’t English, Robbie knew he was swearing that encouragement. There was an entire phalanx of gaming screens, where seated riders, ace assassins, Japanese Samuri, Space Explorers all did battle but there wasn’t an available machine to test himself.

There was quite a mix of ages and it looked like the SLOTS company had provided a small play area for those too young to access the machines (or wait for a parent to finish losing all their money). There was a small group of toddlers, well past their bedtime, looking cheerful as they played with what was on offer. Jokingly, Robbie wondered if that was the only place he’d be able to get a game of any sort. Still he hadn’t given up hope so continued his search.

Time flew as he watched and moved from game to game assessing what his chances would be if he eventually got a turn but in the end he was disappointed not to get that opportunity. However, as he began to return to his parents he saw a flashing slot machine unoccupied and was about to slip in a coin. However, there was a sign that said in several languages that you had to be over 18 to play them so he was thwarted on even that. He returned with the handful of coins as he had no pockets in his shorts.

~

Robbie was feeling a bit down as he arrived at his parent’s table where they’d finished a second cup of coffee. He handed is dad back the €20 in change.

“Sorry dad, didn’t get a chance to play on anything... it’s very busy.”

“Never mind son, we can keep this for another day,” and handed the pile of coins to his wife to put in her copious bag.

“I think it’s time for us to go.” She got up and checked she had everything and smoothly steered her son off down the street.

As he walked ahead she noticed the enlarged profile of a well-filled nappy under his shorts.

“Sweetie, it looks like you could do with a change” They were passing the entrance to a small hotel “There’s probably a toilet in there we could use...”

“No mum please,” he looked a little bit distressed at the thought, “I can wait until we get home, I mean, back to our hotel.”

“Well, if you’re sure, we might be out for a little while yet, it’s quite a walk, so, are you sure?”

He ran his palms over his bulging shorts and felt how much they’d expanded but meekly whispered that he was fine. The fact is, although he’d peed in them a couple of times since they’d been out, he hadn’t been aware of how much larger they’d become, or, as a result, the slightly more emphasised waddle it gave him.

She nodded but made her mind up that they should head straight back to the hotel and have a relatively early night. Even if Thomas had slept most of the afternoon, her and Robbie hadn’t had chance to catch-up from their very early start.

A word in hubby’s ear and they wandered down to the seafront and began their return journey. They passed many lively bars and expensive (and busy) restaurants, some of which they checked out as possible places to dine another night. On the beach some older teens had set up a raucous game of volleyball, whilst others were kicking a ball about, which of course got Robbie wondering if he could get a game. Every few yards there seemed to be someone selling something - sunglasses (at night?), DVDs, colourful fabric wraps, some offering homemade jewellery, colourful things that got launched into the sky and fluttered down in a series of alternating colourful lights. The air was still but the night was full of noise and cheerful screams of excitement. The place was very much alive.

~

It was just after 10:00pm, and although for some the night was yet young, in truth, Robbie had begun to fade a little. It was very nearly his usual bedtime at home, although his parents had said there was no bedtime, other than the same as theirs whilst on holiday. Although he may have desperately wanted to stay up late and enjoy the sights and sounds of the resort, the early morning start was overtaking his ability to stay awake.

Near the hotel Thomas noticed a supermarket open and nipped in and bought some wine so he and Claire could have a romantic drink on the balcony. Meanwhile, his wife, conscious of Robbie’s drooping nappy, steered him straight to the hotel and up to their room. Both seemed relieved to have some privacy as she led him into the bathroom, which was off their bedroom, and immediately got Robbie to strip down. It didn’t take long for him to be standing in just his shiny vinyl pants that hardly containing the expanded disposable.

“Okay love, let’s get these off,” she said easing everything down, “and then slip into the shower and give yourself a thorough wash... there’s some shower gel hanging on that hook.” She pointed to a large plastic bottle with ‘Lavendar Fresh Gel’ in purple writing and grabbed that. Naked he stepped into the shower, whilst Claire wrapped up the soiled nappy and shoved it in the not very discreet bin (at least it didn’t say ‘nappy disposal’ on the front).

As he showered mum got his night time things ready and toyed with the idea of making sure he wore a thin white onesie she’d bought to hold the nappy in place.

“Did the onesie hold everything up tightly sweetheart?” She asked as Robbie stepped from the shower.

“Yes, it made everything so tight and pulled up but...” the rest was drowned out by him spluttering as an enthusiastically applied towel began to rub him dry.

“OK, well we’ll keep them for when we go out to hold everything in place. So tonight sweetie, let’s get you into these.”

So, from the selection of comfy disposables she chose just a nappy and t-shirt if he preferred. She checked the pull-out bed she’d made up earlier where she’d placed the rubber sheet over the mattress to be on the safe side. A thought occurred - should she have pushed the bed into their bedroom as there was plenty of space. However, leaving it where it was would give them all a little bit of privacy and he'd be in a nappy so wouldn’t need the toilet, which was adjoining their bedroom.

The warm shower hadn’t really woken him up and he still felt shattered as she lay him out on his bed and proceeded to get his night time protection in place. There was no protest, no wriggling about and soon she had him in a very nice thick disposable (with extra soaker pad) and had slipped up a pair of pale pink, semi-transparent plastic pants that were amongst the sets she’d brought. She tugged over a pink t-shirt and asked if he wanted to sit out with her and dad on the balcony or get straight into bed.

He thought about staying up but when dad returned with a bottle of white wine decided it would be wise to give them some privacy and get some sleep. He could hardly keep his eyes open anyway so mum directed him toward where he’d be sleeping, gently stroked his hair and wished him a ‘night-night’.

It was moments like this that Claire had begun to live for, when her son just gave up on trying to be a teenager and just sleepily accepted his place as her sweet innocent little boy. She thought, how today, he’d been everything she could have hoped for. He looked like her best behaved little boy from the moment he got up and she’d put him in a disposable and shorts. He may have wished otherwise but once he was in the clothes she’d decided on he never gave her any real backchat - simply accepted it as what was needed. It had been sad for him that he’d pooped his swimming trunks in the pool but he’d even realised that that was nothing to worry about and that mum would be there to sort it out. And now - his thick rounded padded slinky pink bum looked just the job and was wearing his night time padding without any hint of protest. Of course, he may not have known that any of this was the case but as she tucked the white sheet (it was too hot for anything else) around him and kissed him a final time his muted but sweet “night mum” was all she needed to melt her heart.

He was much more tired than he thought because barely moments after he ran his hand over his slippery pants and thought about just how much padding he was wearing; he gave up fighting his drooping eyes and slipped into a deep and welcoming sleep.

~ tbc ~

Part 8

After finishing a bottle of surprisingly good, cheap, chilled Vinho Verde on the balcony, chatting and giggling at the silliness’s that only two people who know each other well can understand, Claire and Thomas eventually made their way back to the bedroom and were enjoying a more intimate, but grown up, pastime. The sound of sobbing greeted them after their second round of lovemaking.

At first Thomas wasn’t too sure what the noise was or where it was coming from but, ever alert Claire picked up on a sound she’d recognised before. Robbie was having a dream, possibly a bad dream, so, extricated herself from her naked hubby, pulled on a large t-shirt and quickly made her way to the darkened room where the sound was more intense.

She knelt down beside the pull-out bed and saw that a sweating Robbie was mewling like a wounded animal caught in a trap. She quietened him by gently stroking his hair so he knew that he was in friendly hands and might slowly emerge from whatever terrible dream had taken hold.

There had been odd occasions over the recent past, and before he was put back into nappies, when she’d heard this sound before. She’d always comforted him but once awake he’d shove her away in annoyance and tell her he was too old to be babied. She wondered if that would happen this time but, as he slowly gained some semblance of consciousness, he threw his arms around her and hugged her “Muuummm” he uttered with relief.

“Oh sweetheart, you seemed to be having a bad dream... are you okay?”

His dad turned on the light and saw just how distressed his son was. Tears had streamed down his face and he looked red-eyed and terrified. He checked his watch, it was 2:35am, and wondered what could have upset him so much.

“I’ll get you some water,” dad went and grabbed a bottle from the fridge then passed it to him. Shaking he took it and gratefully took a deep and long swig; partly to get his thoughts in order and prepare himself for the inevitable question.

“Do you want to tell us about it sweetie?” his mum whispered.

He was trying to think quickly because these days any answer was better than no answer but knowing he couldn’t tell her exactly what his nightmare was about he settled for something trivial-ish but believable.

“I was swimming in the ocean and got dragged out far from land and I was going under the waves... and there was no one around... and I was scared... and, well, erm, I was just sinking and water was...” he gulped breathlessly as he tried to make it plausible.

He looked a little panicked again so she shushed him and hugged him reassuringly.

“There, there sweetheart you’re back on dry land now,” she hoped to lighten his fearful tale a little, “so mum and dad are here to protect you now... okay? So there’s nothing to be scared of we’re just in the other room.” She had a thought “Do you want to come and sleep with us for the rest of the night, hmm?”

Robbie was relieved his story held water; he smiled at this thought because there was no way could he tell them the real reason. On several occasions since it had happened on that fateful and scary day, when he and the gang had, well, it was mainly him, had...

God, he hated thinking about it but when asleep the horror seemed so much more intense and often made him cry out. He knew this had happened and his mother had witnessed it but it had happened many other times which she didn’t know about.

He hoped no one ever got to know.

“No mum, dad, thanks for the offer but I’ll be alright, I know where you are if I need you but I think I should try getting back to sleep.”

“If you’re sure baby... we don’t mind?”

“No, you two get back, I’ll be fine now... thanks,” he said in acknowledgment, holding up the almost empty bottle of water to his dad.

Wearing a pair of hastily pulled on boxer shorts though nothing else dad nodded, “Okay son, sleep tight”. He looked a bit sweaty so perhaps it was as hot in their bedroom as it was here.

Once Claire was sure Robbie was settled they returned to their room but not before she changed the temperature on the air conditioner to make the rooms a little cooler and drew back the heavy curtain and let in a bit of the ambient lighting the pool reflected up into every hotel room.

Robbie settled down and although his flimsy sheet was damp he simply lay on his back and thought about what had happened. The nightmare, THAT NIGHTMARE, had really shaken him. There had been no lead up to it as he hadn’t really thought about it since arriving at the hotel, but like in all things, his mum, and to a certain extent dad, had swept in and comforted his distress. There was no doubt about it - his parent’s concern and affection was total and felt guilty about the things he’d put them through - especially the last few months and what led to having such a sweltering (and pee) inducing dream.

He shoved his hand down into his nappy and was glad mum hadn’t checked because he was soaked. He remembered that the same thing happened when he did the deed, at the time he only hoped that none of the gang looking on noticed, or if they did then they had wet themselves too. With a deep sigh he turned on his side hoping to find a more peaceful place in his mind.

His hand smoothed the slippery surface of his plastic pants. Immediately soothing, thankfully, with this ease in his anxiety, it soon led into a peaceful and unperturbed slumber.

~

As Robbie drifted off his mum and dad were whispering to each other about what had just occurred.

“Poor guy,” dad sounded truly sorry for him “I hope being near the sea doesn’t make him have nightmares every night.”

Claire was more ‘on the ball’ “Oh love, that was just an excuse. He’s hiding something from us.”

“Well, yes I’m sure he is but... how can you tell?” He looked at his wife in the darkness but couldn’t detect her slightly furrowed brow.

“I’ve heard that cry of pain before and know him well enough to distinguish when he’s lying... that’s the main reason we put him back into nappies.” Thomas shrugged but had to agree that Robbie’s irresponsible behaviour had been one of the motives why Claire had suggested such punishment. “It’s something big but he’s scared of telling us, which only makes me more determined to keep him in nappies until he does. Whatever it is, we need to understand it so we know how to deal with it.”

“But he’s had many chances to tell us... anything he wants...”

“Yes... but love, this is something very deep and I’m not sure he actually knows HOW to tell us.”

“Good grief Claire, you think it’s something that bad?” He sounded a bit alarmed.

“Yes, but it’s up to him to come clean, or he gets to stay in nappies until he leaves home.” She sounded very determined.

“Hmmm, we’ll have to wait and see I’m sure he doesn’t want to spend any more time wearing...” Thomas wasn’t sure if his wife had some kind of psychic ability that he lacked.

“No love, I’m sure he doesn’t,” she interrupted, “but he will until we know everything.” There was a moment’s silence and as the lovemaking opportunity had passed they both turned over and tried to get some sleep.

Meanwhile, in the other room, in pleasantly cool surroundings, their son had already slipped into the untroubled sleep of the innocent.

~

Robbie was first to rise. It was just after 7am and although his nighttime padding was heavy and messy, as usual, the thick plastic pants firmly held it all together. Knowing that he wouldn’t be changed until either mum or dad were up and about, he slowly waddled out onto the balcony and was rewarded by watching the sun rise. A few high clouds had caught some colour, which created quite an impressive start to the day. As the morning was fresh but still pleasantly warm he slipped off his pink t-shirt and let those beginning rays warm his chest. He didn’t mind just standing there in a full and bulbous nappy as no one else could see him. He looked down to the pool and watched as one of the staff, dressed in the official hotel uniform of blue polo shirt (with Atlantico logo) and white knee length shorts cleaned and checked all was well for when it officially opened in an hours’ time.

He was surprised to see that over on the beach there were already people and a group of ladies were doing exercises - possibly yoga Robbie thought. He was used to tiptoeing around in his nappy and ran his hands over the hefty weight, the plastic was stretched considerably but still functioning well. He waddled over to the fridge and got himself one of the many juices mum had appropriated the day before to stock up. It was cool and refreshing so went back out onto the balcony to watch as the area got busier and sat waiting for either mum or dad to appear.

The occasional sound of voices, in different languages, drifted up, as did the hum of the pool-boy’s machine that was helping filter out any debris that had found its way onto the pool’s tiled base. After about half an hour, and with the empty bottle of orange juice on the table in front of him, Robbie felt the need to empty his bladder once again. He wasn’t sure if his padding would be able to take another dousing but, as he had little option, and it didn’t look like his parents were coming, he let out a stream much to his relief. He shrugged as the warmth of his pee joined those initial morning rays adding to the early heat of the day. Just when he’d finished filling his nappy, and worrying if it could cope, mum appeared on the balcony and gave him a ‘good morning’ hug.

He didn’t have to say anything as she patted the slippery bulk but told him he’d have to wait a while as dad was taking a shower first.

“Okay,” he nodded and then found something else to talk about. “It was a lovely sunrise...” and they chatted about that and all the other early risers he’d watched.

Mum wanted to talk about his nightmare but that was the last thing Robbie wanted and stuck to his ‘scared at sea’ scenario. Claire made all the correct sympathetic noises and stroked her son’s matted hair “Well let’s hope that’s out of your system now and you’ll feel happier about paddling when the time comes,” she joked.

“Are we planning on the beach this morning then?”

“I’m not sure,” mum replied, “I think dad plans on hiring a car so we can see some sights and also,” she rubbed his red shoulders, “we need to be a bit careful about too much sun too soon, we forget just how strong it gets here.”

Robbie was disappointed as he hoped he’d meet up with Karl and his other friends but decided on not saying anything and just enjoy what they’d planned, after all, they were going to be there for two weeks and the holiday was only a day old.

~

Once the bathroom was free Claire followed Robbie in and attended to his clean up. The disposable was quite full so she emptied as much as she could down the toilet before wrapping it up and throwing it in the bin where it landed with a muted thud! She didn’t like leaving a smelly nappy for the poor maid service to have to deal with so decided that the disposable would, like his fabric nappies, have a nappy liner for easier discarding and a less odious reminder. She thought about releasing him from having to use his nappy for Number 2s for the remainder of the holiday but made the decision that his nappy was there for a reason and to change things would be a mistake – look what happened in his swimming trunks.

Whilst all that was going on in the bathroom Thomas had nipped down to reception to book a car rental for the day. He got maps and various suggestions as to where might be best to visit and was also told about the Toll roads. However, from their coastal position going inland was quite picturesque with lakes and rivers, and if they wanted, could drive to the capital, which he was assured was well worth a look around.

When he arrived back clutching all the info, Claire had Robbie all oiled and powdered and wearing a well-packed disposable, which, according to her, should last for quite some time. The clear plastic pants really looked like glass whilst he was bent over slipping into the blue shorts he wore the day before. A nice large white t-shirt and baseball cap completed his outfit and although the nappy made him waddle slightly he didn’t think it looked too bad at all.

Later, once mum had got herself all dolled up (and had her large, well-prepared bag in hand) they made it down to the breakfast buffet and filled up. Once that was done, dad collected the car from reception, signed a few papers and they set off into the countryside in a rather nice Toyota with mum acting as navigator, which of course, she was very good at.

~

Despite his reservations, because Robbie really wanted to be in the pool with his new buddies, the trip was not as boring as he thought it would be. They got to see some very pretty little villages, charming churches and some spectacular sights (mum went mad photographing the family in various picturesque settings). A cloudless sky made them glad that they kept themselves covered and out of the direct sun.

After a few hours mum noticed that Robbie’s little waddle had become more evident as he negotiated a well-expanded and uncomfortable disposable. He’d tried to avoid it, worrying that others might see but Claire was having none of it, she wasn’t going to let him stew in that state in such weather.

“C’mon love, looks like that can’t wait.” She smiled pointing to his enlarged nappy area.

“Are you sure we won’t be seen?” He whispered nervously.

“Don’t worry love, we’re off the beaten track... it’s quite private.”

“If you’re sure.”

“Okay sweetheart... let’s get these off... and then you’ll feel better,” she smiled cheekily at him. “The first time out in the open... well on foreign soil at least.” She chuckled at the thought.

Little did he know that a group of three boys, aged six, ten and fourteen, witnessed the entire process. Like the Davison family, the Kowalczyk family had taken the opportunity to visit the church in the small village that overlooked the nearby lake. It was an area where tourists, hikers and locals used to explore the lush green landscape, with many tracks and hidden places, whilst the trees offered shady spots and picnic areas out of the heat of the day.

Henryk, the eldest, Tomasz, who was ten and the youngest, six-years-old Lukasz had got bored with their parents and decided to explore the area on their own. They’d noticed a wild fox and followed it which brought them to a little bushy area off the usual trails. They heard a person speaking English and Henryk thought it sounded a bit kochanie (a bit loving) and hoped to catch two lovers perhaps in the act of sex. He wasn’t bothered that his young brothers were with him as this could be fun (and educational). They quietly crept up to see what was going on but couldn’t believe their eyes when they saw a boy, about Tomasz’s age, with a lady changing his pieluszka.

The boy was naked below the waist with shorts and something shiny around his ankles. It was a strange spectacle in such idyllic surroundings as they lay hidden yet enthralled with what was going on.

Because they were well concealed Claire hadn’t noticed them as she was focused on her wet boy - although they had a clear view. She had her large carry-everything-you’ll-ever-need bag by her side and had already begun to gently wipe Robbie clean. Then, like she’d done on so many occasions, lifted his legs up and pressed them back so she had access to those special areas making sure his hairless genitals, bum and relatively pale skin were particularly unsullied.

So, having found a sheltered and shady out-of-the-way spot in the Portuguese countryside she was able to whip off his soaked disposable, wipe clean, re-powder (whilst also applying suntan lotion to those parts on view) and fit a fresh thick blue disposable, which he had to admit, although anxiety inducing to begin with, felt quite liberating to be performed out in the warm country air. Also, a fresh nappy was always better than one that was sodden so he was really quite grateful for his mother’s insistence.

Although uneasy to begin with, the relief of having his soaked nappy removed, the cooling wipes on such a hot day and the flutter of talc as it settled on his skin were all quite enjoyable sensations. Those, together with his mum’s encouraging words (as always), made him lose his inhibitions, for a few moments anyway.

The boys watched, delighting in this embarrassing spectacle, as a lad his age had powder rubbed in whilst his mother uttered soothing words to ease his anxiety (which appeared to work as he looked happy and enjoying the process). They almost gave themselves away when they giggled to each other as she flapped out a piece of material that was clearly meant for a lad who wet himself. A couple of extra soaker pads were added to the fabric as they watched and the lady securely taped it all together making for quite a bulky and undeniably babyish piece of underwear.

She got him to stand up and the boys fell into hysterics at the large and wholesome bulge the boy now had around his privates. They continued to spy as the woman then tugged up his clingy and shiny plastic pants from around his ankles, smoothing them out, whilst checking he was well contained before pulling up a pair of blue shorts. The boy seemed happy with the result and thanked his mum with a hug.

Claire heard some distant noise but thought little of it because now her son was covered and well protected... the job done... it wouldn’t matter who passed by.

~

It was only when they returned to the car park and Robbie was pointed at by Lukasz (who’d been out of pieluszki himself for nearly eighteen months) and the shout of “Ten chłopiec nosi pieluchę...” followed by snickers from three boys, that Claire realised what might have happened. She noticed that the car had Polish registration so could only guess what was being said. Still, it was done, Robbie was now ‘fresh-as-a-daisy’ and the chances were they wouldn’t see any of those kids ever again.

However, Robbie thought they were having a go and looked apprehensive. “Mum, what did they say?”

“Hmm, not sure but it sounded like, erm, they spotted us in the church,” she hoped this white lie would allay his worries. “Perhaps they were having a game of I-spy or some such thing?”

This was only the start of the holiday and already it had a real impact on Robbie’s emotions. There were moments when he didn’t mind wearing a nappy (though had no choice). There were moments when he was thankful for a change and the painstaking care his parents took to make sure he was clean and comfy. There were times when he felt like a little kid, mostly when mum insisted he hold her hand, and despite the reflex to react badly, oddly he quite liked. Sometimes, in his excitement, he’d pee into his padding, and, as had so recently happened, he’d proved that he now not only needed but relied on a nappy to be safe and secure.

With this in mind, Robbie surreptitiously ran his hands over his shorts and patted down his padding and hoped no one knew. Although it had been quite nice getting changed in the open air, and certainly his nappy had been very wet so needed it, he hoped that that mum had been true in her assurances that there had been no witnesses to the event.

Robbie didn’t know it but that al fresco nappy change had provided a huge amount of amusement to three boys from Poland who would spend the next few hours in the back of a car joking about it and wondering what they’d see as they drove to their next scenic view.

~

Robbie didn’t know it at the time but from the moment his dad put him back in nappies he was ‘broken’. He may have had ideas that as an independent twelve-year-old he was in charge of his destiny (or whatever a lad his age thought in terms of) he wasn’t. The instant he was put back into wearing a nappy his life was about to be reassembled.

Of course it was aided by the simple fact that Robbie had a conscience, something the rest of the little gang lacked. So all the terrible things he did with them were a weight he carried around, even if, on a day-to-day basis he was unaware of it. After ‘the event’, that all but tipped him over the edge, he knew he'd have to pay a price. He thought it would probably be in the courts; he had no idea that even without knowing about THAT particular circumstance, his parents had decided that something needed to be done and were already committed to taking the job on.

It’s strange how two independent ideas can accidently, or as if by fate, come together and form something completely different yet meaningful.

They said they knew what he’d done, and that revelation had been a shock, but he wasn’t sure just what they knew so danced around the issue. However, he was bright enough to know that if they actually knew about THAT then everything would come to an end... but he didn’t know what exactly it was that they did know?

The thing was, THAT act of stupidity was quite a while ago now, and although the guilt was ever present, he was beginning to feel that because of the interval, it was possibly past the point where he would be held to account.

Nevertheless, the nappy was such a big thing, not physically, but mentally and one that he reacted to, it was such a juvenile thing to do and stood no chance of him actually agreeing to it. However, once wearing such infantile padding, and as odd as it may seem, things started to improve. Of course he hated the very idea but his parents were determined and so definite it was what needed to be done. They saw he required them to step up so, they would take no excuses, they would tolerate no nonsense, they wanted him to open up and confess all his ‘sins’... but he still couldn’t, not everything.

However, because of his parent’s intervention and assumed knowledge there was much confusion and shame going on in Robbie’s head, not helped by the feeling that if he didn’t comply he’d face the strap, something that was never threatened. He needed a reason to submit and his brain, whether knowing it or not, decided that, and his guilty conscience, were to be the necessary motivators.

Mum had been extremely forceful in exactly how he needed to be rebuilt and that was by starting from scratch, let him know he was still only a child in her eyes and therefore relied on her and dad for everything. She was surprised at how easily it had been to get him into nappies but once he was... that was it. Pissing and shitting in his nappy was ridiculous and yet she’d unswervingly insisted he did so. She was driving the change, the re-build, but always with lashings of love and encouragement. He was finding it hard to deny just how nice it felt to be back being a part of a family and being loved.

Mum and dad know best, he could feel it, perhaps strangely, even from the very start his nappy had become a symbol of his place in the family group. Although he resented its bulk he had no option but to wear one and it was surprisingly always quite comfortable.

As time has gone on, and the strict boundaries his parents imposed, made his life so much less stressful. Even though the very idea of a lad his age wearing a nappy was stressful, it was less so. The fact that he’d just had his soggy nappy changed out in the open was proof of just how accepting he’d become of the situation.

“Thanks mum” had not been something he ever thought he’d say following such an event... and yet he had done and probably more often than he remembered.

~

Thomas drove around for another couple of hours, deciding not to go as far as Lisbon but stopping off at various points for mum to add to her photo collection and to admire the many and varied stunning views. Several of the shots featured glimpses of Robbie’s sleek underwear that he was unaware was often on show. Mum didn’t want to make him feel inhibited or awkward about such a thing so didn’t mention it, she simply appreciated his sweet juvenile appearance.

As had been the case on several occasions, if people saw Robbie’s shiny padding, time and again the adults especially just smiled and nodded in acknowledgement, as if they were all on the same wavelength, or maybe, that was just how Claire interpreted such encounters. Still, in her mind at least when Robbie was like this; happy, fun and compliant and not worrying about anything, she remembered that’s how he used to be when a toddler. He was a gorgeous, loving, uncomplicated kid and she could see those sweet harmless mannerisms returning each day. Besides, to see her boy’s padded bottom had to be one of the nicest views around. That’s why she’d taken as many shots of that as she had of the impressive Portuguese scenery.

Just after 7pm they arrived back at the hotel. Dad returned the car whilst mum and Robbie headed back up to the room. They planned on having a quick meal in the hotel before heading down to the harbour for the festivities and fireworks planned during the Festa (Fiesta). The receptionist had told them if they hadn’t booked a table early on then finding something in the town would be quite difficult. She’d also told them that the best view of the fireworks was from the hotel’s Rooftop bar but it was far more fun to be down on the beach and harbour itself to get involved during the celebrations.

Back in their room Claire had taken her son’s very wet nappy off and whilst doing so had made some very positive comments about how good he was for using it and not causing a fuss. She also reminded him that he should let her know when he wet so as he wasn’t left too long between changes. She checked that he wasn’t suffering from any kind of rash and was pleased to see that everything was as it should be. All the time she was being positive and encouraging, saying how much she loved him and that both she and dad were so proud of the way he was handling things. It was almost as if his guilty secret no longer mattered as long as he wore a nappy, which in truth was exactly how Claire was beginning to think. Loads of cream and powder followed the clean-up and his fresh disposable had a nappy liner over the extra soaker pad. When she pulled it all together Robbie thanked her and smiled. It appeared to Claire that he was now enjoying such attention, and she was content to keep it going. His new plastic pants were a very glossy white with thick waist and leg bands to keep everything secure. As always he looked so adorable and when he smiled, well, Claire’s heart all but melted – the look really suited him.

By the time dad arrived back, complete with a bag of stuff to restock the fridge, a soggy Robbie had been cleaned up, re-nappied for the evening and dressed in khaki elasticated shorts and matching shirt – his mum thought he looked like a boy scout who had yet to win any badges.

He was standing out on the balcony, again watching all the comings and goings down by the pool, which seemed very busy. He was hoping to see Karl and his family but although there was plenty of noise and people down there, he couldn’t identify them in the crowd.

“Looking smart son.” Thomas offered as he joined his son for a brief glance at what was holding his interest.

Robbie beamed under the praise as dad patted his shoulder and they both stood peering over the glass balustrade. The place was lit up with coloured lights, whilst the trees seemed festooned with white fairy-lights, it all looked quite magical. Off to one side the hotel seemed to be shimmering as the moving water in various pools reflected up and against the walls giving a rippling effect. The sun had gone down and some of the brighter stars out over the ocean were appearing and reflecting in the particularly placid water.

Anticipating being out and about for some time enjoying what the festivities had to offer, Thomas could see that Claire had fitted Robbie into padding she intended would last the night. His khaki shorts hardly able to contain the bulk but still Robbie looked comfortable as he moved around the balcony being lively and funny as he chatted about what was going on down below.

“Well, I’d better go and see what your mum has determined I should wear tonight...” Thomas jokingly confided, “You think you’re the only one who has it already sorted.” He said giving his son a friendly - we’re in this together - smirk.

For the first time Robbie didn’t have the retort “At least you won’t have to wear a nappy” because he didn’t even think it. His mum had thoroughly cleaned him up and sorted out the nappy without any argument or fuss from him. He hadn’t tried to talk his way out of it or try to get some kind of concession. It seemed that by osmosis - the process of gradual or unconscious assimilation – he’d accepted this was how it was. There was no point in making waves, this is what had been decided and he could cope with wearing nappies, if he could forget that was the case. Although that was hard to begin with, daily, it was getting easier.

From Robbie’s perspective, and he wondered if it was all down to the ‘holiday spirit’ there was something really nice about being a family again. He’d been aware that it was his attitude and actions that had caused the rift over the past year, but here, in a foreign land, if he didn’t rock-the-boat, or return to his more objectionable behaviour, this holiday could be fun because so far it had already been great... well... except for messing his swimming trunks.

~

Later, having enjoyed their first noisy and busy buffet style meal in the Atlantico restaurant, they wondered along the front. The night was fairly close; no breeze and heat of the day had hardly dispersed but the crowds were as active and raucous as they strolled along. The beach was once again alive with groups playing volleyball, throwing frisbees, kicking balls or simply sauntering down by the water’s edge. In the distance music and the thud of drums could be heard signifying that there was live acts performing somewhere. Little canvas cabins had been set up selling all manner of trinkets and souvenirs, some offering bookings for trips out to meet whales or sight-seeing along the coast. Jugglers and clowns would suddenly appear, even a fire-eater had a huge crowd watching as he let flames dance up his glistening, young all-but naked body. In a little but packed square, kids were entranced as a teenage girl was making huge bubbles and letting them chase and burst them. Everywhere you turned there was something going on and they’d hardly got anywhere near the harbour yet.

With such huge crowds progress was slow, although that could have been down to the fact that there was just too much to see and enjoy. Happily for Robbie, the drinks he’d had in the restaurant had gone straight through him and he was happy that his extra padding dealt with the flow. As the night progressed he became quite grateful for his mum’s dedication to his protection because he’d be using it on several occasions.

The restaurants and bars along the front were packed with some people hopefully queueing to get a seat. There were plenty of small kiosks selling local tasty food and drink as well as ice cream and beers (though not necessarily together). As they approached the harbour it had been transformed into a huge stadium with lighting rigs, a stage, banks of speakers and a live rock band that was playing one of Robbie’s favourite songs. It was a colourful, noisy and wonderful atmosphere with some people dancing with head or armbands that were illuminated in sparkling flashing lights. Everyone seemed to be having a fantastic time.

~

With the end of a song and applause a slight lull in proceedings was suddenly interrupted by a particularly loud bang. Robbie knew he wasn’t the only one who wet himself at the unexpected sudden boom. However, the sky lit up so it was the prelude to the firework display. Moored offshore were three pontoons where rockets were being launched and the heavens exploded in a blaze of colour, bangs, sparkles and crackles. From the rocky headlands other pyrotechnics spewed out fountains of sparks or colourful arcing fireballs. The crowd erupted in applause as each detonation delivered an even bigger bloom of colour all fantastically reflected in the tranquil sea.

Robbie had somehow found himself separated from his parents as he’d rushed forward to get a better view and was surrounded by loads of kids from tots to teens all looking wide-eyed and impressed as each rocket delivered some incredible explosive effect. He found himself, like the rest, emotionally involved in each crackle and bang, jumping up and down and screaming with childlike excitement. With the crowds pushing and converging around him he couldn’t have got to a toilet even if one was near. So, his extra padding was swelling all the time, it was just as well mum had put him in his new robust plastic pants as the weirdly stimulated torrent continued to flow and needed containing.

Robbie knew what was happening but couldn’t stop it even if he wanted to. The atmosphere, the exhilaration – it was like when he was a four year old and Christmas Day arrived, with all the anticipation, excitement and then the actuality of all the presents, he wet himself then as well. He ran his hand over his shorts trying not to be obvious as he checked that there were no leaks and found relief in the fact they were dry, even if what was underneath was squishy and full.

The terrific display ended with a huge canopy of colourful, sparkling stars that seemed to cover the entire sky. The crackles, fizzes and pops as they cascaded down was a fitting finale to such a visual spectacular but the festivities continued. In the square a new band had taken to the stage and more thudding rock bounced around to the enjoyment of the large crowd. People were still arriving because it was relatively early and, according to the receptionist, the fun wouldn’t stop until midnight.

As the crowd of kids dispersed it appeared several of the younger ones were a bit disorientated because they’d ‘lost’ parents. The look of relief as the grown-ups swept in to claim their offspring was unmistakeable as tears turned into happy smiles. For a moment Robbie himself wondered if he was lost but a brief scan of the surroundings saw them watching about twenty yards away. Robbie had never seen his mum and dad drinking beer from bottles and in truth he was looking forward to tasting the can of Coca Cola with which they were enticing him back.

“WOW,” he exclaimed, “that was pretty intense wasn’t it.”

His parents nodded in agreement as he ripped open the can and thirstily slurped it down.

“Go easy love,” his mum gently admonished, “not sure your nappy can take much more.” She whispered as she patted the expanded cushion.

“It’s okay mum... I can cope.”

“Okay love but I have a spare if you need a change... I’m sure we can find somewhere private, there are plenty of hotels around.”

“No need mum, I’ll just cut down on the fluids...er... after this,” he shirked knowingly as he finished the can.

~

They spent the next couple of hours watching the bands, wandering the streets where there seemed to be some form of entertainment on every corner and enjoying the Festa vibe. Kids and families, lovers and friends, tourists and locals all in a melting pot of foodie-smells and noise that made the late evening a wonderful place to be. Mum of course took even more photographs to add to her ever-growing collection. Robbie was only too happy to pose with the resort’s mascot, whatever it was supposed to be... definitely an animal of some kind?

By eleven thirty Robbie was beginning to drag. This was the latest he’d stayed up for several weeks and despite the initial adrenalin of the occasion, he needed sleep, and, because he was waddling pretty excessively, Claire knew it was more than time for a nappy change. So, they headed back to the Atlantico.

The echoing of the music from the square was still apparent as they slowly made their way back along the seafront promenade, although the crowds had thinned slightly. Robbie could see younger kids than him, still full of life playing on the beach but for him it was time to turn in.

It was past midnight by the time the entered their twelfth-floor apartment and Robbie all but collapsed onto his made up bed in the living room.

She hadn’t noticed before, and it could have happened when he sat down on his bed, but the back of his khaki shorts had a couple of damp half-moon shapes showing that his disposable hadn’t been able to contain everything on this occasion.

However, she realised they had been out for quite some time and he’d drunk several cans of coke and bottles of water so perhaps it was unavoidable that, without a change at some point, the inevitable happened. She once again made a mental note to make sure her ‘carry-all bag’ would be with her on every outing... no matter how short or long.

“C’mon sweetheart, let’s get you ready properly,” Claire said pulling him to his feet and guiding him to the bathroom which was off their room.

She undressed him and once she had him stripped naked and had dealt with the incredibly soaked disposable, sponged him down and dried him off. She rinsed out his shorts in the sink but didn’t say anything to Robbie in case he felt anxious that others might have noticed as they walked back. She guided him to his bed where the padded mat she changed him on had already been prepared by Thomas with everything else that would be needed.

As they discussed the night’s events and highlights, Claire fitted her twelve-year-old son back into a thick, thick disposable, with soaker pad and nappy liner and slipped up a pair of pale blue plastic pants.

“I don’t think I need anything else tonight thanks, I was pretty sweaty last night so think I can do without wearing a t-shirt.”

“Okay love, if you’re sure but I’ll leave one out just in case it gets chilly, although I don’t see that happening.” She smiled and brushed a few imaginary stray hairs from his forehead. “It’s been a fantastic day Robbie, and you’ve been fantastic company... so thank you.” She kissed his cheek and drew back the sheet for him to climb under. “Night love”.

Claire pegged out his wet shorts to dry overnight as she and Thomas sat on the balcony chatting about the day and making plans for the next but returned to their room after about thirty minutes. They noticed that Robbie was already out for the count and the sheet had been cast off because of the heat. Once again they looked down at their son and saw just how cute and innocent he looked, his thick nappy bulging out his plastic pants that glowed with an incandescent magic from the light coming in off the brightly lit pool reflecting in the room.

~

What mum and dad didn’t know was that Robbie was deep into another dream but it couldn’t have been more different than the previous nights. Where that was full of his personal horrors, this was, well, it started off not very nice but ended up... okay. He was in the square where the band was playing and surrounded by hundreds of people when his mum decided he needed a change. He protested that it could wait but she insisted that they do it there and then. Reluctantly, he lay out and his mum pulled off his jeans (yes he was wearing jeans) slipped his plastic pants down to his ankles, which revealed a very messy fabric nappy. Of course she had her large nappy bag containing wipes, powder and all the rest, including a large white terry nappy (like the ones he wore at home except larger) which, after a long and conscientious clean-up was pinned tightly into place. All the time the crowd was watching and encouraging not only his mum but him.

“You’re a good boy” “Such a sweet lad” “A boy needs his mummy to look after him”. Even though some of these things were shouted and encouraged in other languages he knew what they were saying.

In the end, and with a larger than normal nappy pinned in place and his plastic pants eased over it all, the crowd was shouting and applauding in approval. He stood in the middle of the square surrounded by a whooping and cheering mob who all thought he looked great and said how much the nappy suited him. He was overcome by the support he was getting and his mum was all smiles as he waved to what had become an adoring throng.

More comments were shouted, pats on the back and on his padded bottom followed as he was hoisted onto the shoulders of some young men who began to parade him through the streets. He was enjoying the attention and the love that seemed to emanate from the mass when he woke up.

Disorientated as to where exactly he was he rammed his hand down the front of his padding and was surprised to find himself dry. That, coupled with the feeling of euphoria made him lay awake for a few moments wondering what it could all mean.

Was it a warning, except he seemed happy in his dream? Was it acceptance of his situation? Was it a portent of things to come? Was it something he wanted??? It was like a game of ping-pong his thoughts going backwards and forth.

Unfortunately, the reason escaped him when he fell back to sleep and in the morning, as he’d done so often, woke up to a very soggy disposable and a bubbling bowel. He was sure there would be no parade through the streets on this occasion. Mum was going to have her hands full yet again... but thankfully not witnessed by a cheering multitude.

~ tbc ~

 

Part 9

After the morning clean-up Claire put Robbie back into another disposable but not quite as bulky and told him to pull on his neoprene shorts to see how it looked. The soft rubbery material covered the layers of fabric surprisingly well without it being that obvious.

Of course Robbie was hoping to do without any extra padding as he was expecting a day in the pool and on the beach. However, because of his accident the day before he didn’t raise any complaints and simply accepted what she was doing for him. Whether it was the positive dream of ‘public acceptance’ or was simply done fighting for any right to use the toilet, he stayed quiet as they toddled down to the breakfast buffet. Rather than return to their room mum had brought her famous bag and looked ready for a day at the beach. Thomas, wearing a fine pair of swim shorts and open shirt, looked like a man ready (and able) to swim across the Atlantic. Robbie didn’t feel his rubber swimwear looked too out of place as they searched for an empty and clean table.

Despite having certain facilities in their room – electric kettle, toaster, fridge and microwave - thanks to their wristbands they had access to the buffet every morning. Having secured a table looking out onto the busy garden area, they ordered coffee for two, whilst Robbie went off to investigate the array of colourful juices arranged by an ice stand. It all looked very refreshing. There was a selection of different cold meats, pastries, buns, fruit and yoghurts. Luckily, a fresh batch of scrambled egg had just been delivered although some bacon and few other cooked bits and pieces were left looking a bit forlorn and not very appetising. So, they loaded up their plates with the egg and went off in search of bread and the toaster.

Thirty minutes later they were full and heading down onto the beach for the first time during the day. The coastline was beautiful with brilliant soft yellow sand and arched rock formations but very busy near the hotel. Just a short walk further along towards town it was less crowded so that’s where they went to set up their place for the day. Thankfully for Claire not all the sunbeds with umbrellas were taken and she and Thomas snagged a couple, whilst they spread out a huge towel for Robbie who’d said he wasn’t bothered about having a lounger as he wanted to explore.

“We’re going to be sensible in the sun... we don’t want to spoil the rest of our hols by getting sunstroke... so, both of you,” mum was brandishing a squeezy bottle of Factor30 lotion in their direction, “let’s get you well-covered with regular top ups”.

She saw how eager Robbie was to get off and check what was going on along the shoreline. Already, games involving bat and ball, footballs, frisbees and the like were being played by groups or couples before it got too hot to play. Kids, already coated as he was being, were wrapped up but building sandcastles or gently experimenting with how cold the sea was by dipping a toe in and running away screaming with joy.

Finally mum had finished rubbing in Factor30 and told him to wear his t-shirt to be on the safe side. His neoprene shorts, with built in protection, felt quite heavy but he was used to that now so despite that was keen to start his exploration.

“Don’t disappear completely and make a note of where we are,” she looked around and saw a lifeguard tower, “we’re in a direct line with that should the crowds get busy so you’ll know where we are.”

“Okay, yes I’d already noticed that” he shrugged wondering if his mum thought he was completely stupid.

“I know, I know,” she smiled, “just making sure and we’ll be here all day and I have provisions” she said tapping her large bag, “so, if you get thirsty or hungry you know where to come.”

“Yes mum,” Robbie just wanted to be off and was getting frustrated at being told the obvious.

“If you need a fresh disposable,” she whispered, “I have one here so...”

“Mum, I know... now can you please...” and he pulled away and started off down the beach.

“And wear your cap.” Was the last thing she was able to shout as he barrelled down to the sea and began his walk free from his parent’s clutches.

As they saw their son disappear into the half-naked throng of beach lovers Claire took the opportunity to float the idea to her hubby of homeschooling him.

~

There were plenty of people in the sea swimming around, enjoying fun on inflatables and in kayaks. There were pedalos and powerful water-skis, which Robbie was desperate to try and hoped to convince his dad to let him have a go. The entire ocean seemed full of action, noise and fun. He was desperate to take his t-shirt off but knew that its length actually covered a good half of his trunks and hiding quite a bit of his extra padding, so thought better of it.

For Robbie this was a moment of freedom and, if he wanted these moments to continue, he’d have to make sure he didn’t do anything stupid to jeopardise doing this regularly throughout the holiday. Despite the disposable under his trunks he assumed no one else would be any the wiser. He confidently kicked a wayward ball back to a group of older boys who were taking up a great area of roped off beach as they engaged in a raucous game of five-a-side. They were hooting and hollering, laughing and some of those watching drinking (even at that early hour) but he thought it best not to ask if he could join in.

As he sauntered along he was enjoying the gentle waves breaking against his bare feet, whilst taking in the scenery – it was all quite exhilarating and liberating.  There was plenty to take in, kids building sandcastles, some more advanced than others. Some scooping out tunnels for the tide to rush into. People looking brown as coffee or red as traffic lights (they should just stop sunning themselves). Whilst other were just casually laying out in the sun enjoying the Portuguese climate.

He didn’t know how long he’d been walking; it only seemed a short while but when he looked back realised just how far away from the hotel he was. At the same time he recognised he needed to pee but couldn’t decide whether to try and find a public toilet or simply fill his disposable as usual. Of course, under normal circumstances, he’d just go for a swim and let nature and the ocean deal with it. However, he knew that if he went in the water his nappy would expand and probably be seen as it bloated out his trunks. Whilst he was looking around for a possible alternative he foolishly stood on a broken shell and that brought about its own decision as the painful shock made for an unexpected spurt into his nappy. He hopped about in agony but was quite unable to stop the flow as the thirsty padding soaked up the couple of ex-fruit juices he’d had at breakfast.

He flopped down in pain at the water’s edge to check his foot and saw the embedded shell but it hadn’t broken the skin though had left a very red mark. He hadn’t realised it but he’d also let out a scream when he’d stood on it which he only realised when a young guy, perhaps in his late teens, wearing red shorts and a yellow t-shirt with LIFE GUARD written on it was standing at his side asking if he was okay.

As Robbie could see the concern on the guy’s face he tried to say that he’d just stood on a shell but that otherwise he was okay.

“Ahh English?” The young man said in perfect, if slightly accented, English. He checked the wound and smiled. “Yes, I think you’ll be fine... I thought you might have accidentally stood on a jellyfish.” He confided to who he thought was a little kid. “We sometimes get a few floating in over the nets.” He pointed out to a series of buoys that surrounded a ‘safe swim’ area. “Not often but it does happen anyway, you look... erm...” He noticed that the young lad he was attending wore padding under his trunks which was noticeably bunching out of the waistband at the back and wondered if he was lost or too far away from his parents. Although he didn’t look confused or lost, because of this padding he thought the boy might have some kind of special needs. “Do you know where you’re staying,” he was quite concerned but tried not to alarm the poor lad who looked like he might need a nappy change as he looked around to see if there were any anxious parents searching for a lost son.

“We’re at the Atlantico,” Robbie replied innocently not catching on to the lifeguards concern but realising that the warmth around his genitals meant that his bladder was now empty and needed to return to where his parents were.

“Ooh you’ve walked quite a way haven’t you... are you okay... to get back... with your sore foot?” He held out his hand to help the youngster to his feet, which Robbie gratefully took.

He took a couple of exploratory steps, “Mmmm should be okay, it’s not that far.” Once he stood up his t-shirt fell back around his hips and hid most of his bloated trunks. However, the lifeguard didn’t know what to do for the best – not sure he should let a possible boy with difficulties negotiate his own way back or take him there himself. The beach was very busy and it would mean there would be only one other lifeguard on duty if he did but his conscience wouldn’t let him abandon this young boy.

“Look, why don’t I take you back.” And pointed to the Lifeguard station where a quadbike stood awaiting use. “Let me speak to my colleague and then we should be set.” Robbie waddled from both a sore foot and the expanded disposable but was grateful for the offer as he had no idea how long he’d been walking. His mum expected him back for a refresh of Factor30 after a couple of hours but was sure he hadn’t been away that long.

After a brief conversation, and a surprised and weary look from the other, slightly older lifeguard, the younger one got on the quadbike and indicated for Robbie to get on behind him and hold on tight. It was quite the experience as the driver weaved his way between all the beach lovers. He was certainly going faster than Robbie could have walked it but there was no real speed to the journey. However, there was space down at the water’s edge that was less busy and the quadbike splashed through the sea as they got up a little speed.

Robbie was loving every minute of the journey, arms wrapped around the waist of his rescuer hugging him tightly out of shear excitement. He could feel his expanded nappy rubbing up against the seat of the lifeguard’s shorts with the vibrations from the engine and it felt wonderful. All too soon Robbie realised they were almost at the position he’d left his mum and dad and saw his mum on her feet looking anxiously about. When she noticed the quadbike and her boy on the back she waved frantically so they knew where they were.

The bike stopped and Robbie got off and sauntered up to his mum and dad who looked both angry and relieved.

“Where have you been... I told you to be back in two hours... it’s been...” Robbie had his ear full as Claire, relieved he was okay but angry he’d been away for over three and half hours, gradually calmed down. In the meantime, Thomas was speaking to the lifeguard who explained about Robbie’s possible cut foot and his worry about a young boy wearing a full nappy out on his own.

Strangely, Thomas felt guilty as it appeared to the lifeguard that they weren’t taking care of their young son who had wandered off. It felt weird that Thomas was trying to defend himself but was also trying to tell the man that he was twelve, and quite capable but also dealing with the fact that they made him wear a nappy. He ended up telling the lifeguard they’d be more careful in future and thanked him for his concern and the return of their boy. Satisfied, the lifeguard gunned up the quadbike and, with a wave to Robbie, set off back to his part of the beach.

Robbie missed the wave because his mum was berating him but when he heard the quadbike moving and saw the back of the lifeguard and empty seat where only recently he’d sat huddled up, he felt a loss and wasn’t sure why.

~

With Robbie suitably chastened by mum and he’d sighed in submission she suggested he was changed.

“Please mum not in public,” he begged.

“No of course not love, follow me.” She grabbed her bag and his hand and headed back up towards the seafront esplanade. He didn’t even think about not holding her hand, as things were it seemed like a natural thing to do.

“Are we going back to the hotel?” Robbie asked hopefully.

“No that’s just a bit too far and for now we want to stay on the beach but I’m reliably informed this restaurant has excellent toilet facilities so, we’re going to use theirs.”

She didn’t say who informed her or how she knew but the place was very busy so it was easy to pretend to be just a customer using the facilities as normal. They had to wait for the large, handicapped toilet to come free but once it was she pushed Robbie in and began to immediately take down his neoprene trunks. The toilet was relatively clean and had facilities for the handicapped and baby-change, though Claire didn’t need that she’d do it all with Robbie standing.

Meanwhile, back at the sun loungers, dad was just coming to terms with being reprimanded by a teenager and accused of neglect of a minor - the lifeguard had thought Robbie was much younger. It had been some time since Thomas had been lectured in such a way and chuckled to himself at such an appalling but understandable thing happening. Especially if the other person thought his son was of ‘special needs’, which was what the lifeguard inferred.

Back in the disabled toilet a very brief discussion took place.

“The ride back on the quadbike was pretty cool,” Robbie didn’t mention how he had loved hugging the lifeguard tightly all the way back. He felt safe.

“Did he think you were lost?” Mum gently enquired.

“No, I stood on a broken shell, it was quite painful and he checked that I was okay... but thought I’d wandered quite some way from the hotel.”

“Well that was very nice of him to bring you back and I’ll check your foot in a minute.”

As she revealed the expanded disposable Robbie added. “I could have just gone in the sea if I didn’t have this on,” he said tugging at the sopping padding.

“Well sweetheart,” her initial anxiety now diminished, “after yesterday’s little mishap we want you to be safe, and, to make sure you are, you’ll always be wearing a nappy when you’re out and about.”

Claire had her son’s trunks down and peeling him out of the wet disposable noticed that there was more than just pee as he seemed to have got over-excited about something. Anyway, she wasn’t going to say anything, he was after all a growing boy so who knew what had got him ‘excited’? However, she was very quick and had him wrapped into a fresh nappy, complete with cream and powder, in seconds.

Once again she marvelled at just how wonderful he looked once the disposable was taped on tightly. At the same moment she saw a resigned frown at being told he’d be wearing a nappy at all times so took the opportunity, like she used to do when he was a toddler, of kissing his foot better. That simple trick had the desired effect as it had them both giggling because it was so childish but also tickled. With his swimming trunks pulled up to hide the new padding and the feeling of fresh rather than soaked padding in place, they returned to the loungers for a spot of sunbathing. Though not before mum produced a few ham sandwiches and bottles of juice from her bag. How she did it or when she’d had time was a mystery but as always, mum being mum, she was well prepared.

When the disposable was fresh and hadn’t expanded it wasn’t very noticeable, although Robbie’s crotch and bottom sported a very smooth and rounded appearance but thought no more about it as he sprawled on a towel spread out on the sand next to mum’s lounger. Claire rubbed an extra layer of Factor30 into his skin, which seemed to relax him even more so it felt quite pleasant soaking up the early afternoon heat.

The family spent the next couple of hours out in the sun but mum was keeping an eye on the time and thought they’d had enough for one day. They retired to their hotel balcony where they could pull the sun awning down for shade and chill with a cool drink. What was even nicer, because they were higher up, there was a slight breeze and although Robbie would have preferred to be in the pool, accepted that, for the time being at least, he needed to keep mum happy and do as advised. Dad and Robbie played a game of cards whilst mum updated her tablet with the photos she wanted to keep and the latest on her son’s ongoing ‘therapy’.

 ~

The day before the holiday began Claire had published on one of the busy online family help groups a brief synopsis of what was going on with Robbie. She asked readers to offer up opinions and any other information they thought might be of use. She was quite candid about everything but mentioned his -antisocial behaviour thanks to a new group of ‘friends’, leading to his worsening attitude at home - and just what a nice, pleasant and thoughtful boy he used to be. She explained her decision to return him to wearing a nappy as a reminder he was still only a child and that they were in charge. This was the first opportunity she’d had to read what others thought. She was overwhelmed by this initial response.

At first she thought she may have made a huge mistake. The first four comments all criticised her for psychologically damaging her son - the nappies being a terrible resource with which to use against him and several other attacks on her ‘so called’ parenting skills. However, these comments themselves then came under attack from those who thought a parent should do whatever was deemed necessary to keep their offspring on “a legal and fruitful road to social interaction”. In the end she reckoned that there was a 20/80 split in her favour in contributor’s opinions. What was consoling was that some of those who did comment had professed that they only wished they had taken such a brave stand to keep their kids manageable and wished her luck in her obvious loving endeavours.

Of course she had been hoping for 100% support of her and Thomas’s actions but had been greatly encouraged by Robbie himself. Without the negative influence of his school buddies and the determination to get him to wear his nappies constantly, all she saw was improvement. Robbie may not have liked it but it appeared to be working. He may have argued in the early stages but now accepted it was going to happen and had no say in that decision.

Although, in such a relative short space of time, she was keen to trumpet the positives of Robbie’s much better conduct, she was less keen to explain how her own psychological approach had changed. This was partly down to the fact that she just wasn’t sure herself which part was more important – him wearing a nappy or getting him back into the family fold. At times, these intentions crossed nicely and both could be achieved but not always. There were undoubted doubts in her head, which were, now others had started to make judgements, proving tricky to rationalise.

One parent wrote how much she admired the lengths Claire and her husband were going to in order to protect their son from outside evils and wished them well. However, her insistence that firm and regular spanking, coupled with the wearing of nappies would, she enthused, “Get the point over quicker and more effectively”. Spanking had never been in their equation of punishments even if Robbie was sure that it was.

Another correspondent was impassioned in her belief that all boys should have regular beatings and kept in nappies until they were eighteen or left home. It was the way she’d brought up her three boys and they were perfect husbands who knew their place. It seemed putting an idea out online had created a rallying point for people with extreme views as well as those with a more considered approach.

Claire and Thomas hadn’t thought about such extremes but had wondered what they would have done had they not been able to convince Robbie he had to wear a nappy. The fact that he succumbed to their initial demand was welcome but, over time, she’d begun to wonder if it was just too easy. Did Robbie, despite all the denials and arguments, actually like the situation he was now in. Did he feel he deserved such punishment AND if he did, what had he done to make him feel that accountable?

Of course, in that initial stage they had put an awful lot of pressure on him to comply with their demands but left exactly what would be any retribution for him to decide. He’d confessed to a few things but they kept pushing and pushing to know more and he just couldn’t own up to anything horrendous, even though, from his own guilty reaction and rumours flying around the neighbourhood about the gang, there were a number. 

Over the few weeks he’d been in nappies Claire had observed some kind of inner turmoil. On a few occasions she’d seen him almost crying and wondered why – a nappy was hardly something to cry about – she decided that there must be something a lot deeper going on... but what?

She wondered if the article might have been premature, or maybe even a mistake, but there were plenty of remarks asking for further developments and hoping for the desired outcome to be positive so something others could learn from. So far she hadn’t shared any of the many photos she’d taken to catalogue Robbie’s ‘journey’ but deliberated whether this would be a good or bad thing.

However, comments, the comments on comments and then comments on comments on comments, continued as the summary of her family’s current status seemed to have harvested a great deal of interest. Was she doing the right thing for all concerned? Did she think that she had the answer to sorting out any wayward troubled youngster...?

Some of the opinions, reservations, disapproval and completely weird suggestions of those commenting really did make her question her own motives. “You’re crippling the boy psychologically” out of all the replies it was that reference that stuck in her mind. Despite the many more positive remarks she couldn’t shake that one from her mind. Was making Robbie wear a nappy; to teach him he was still only a boy... a bit bizarre.

Had this become a vanity project?

On the other hand, that uncertainty only lasted until his next change when she saw just how sweet and compliant Robbie had become. There was no doubt in her mind that with his small, slim figure, a nappy and plastic pants gave him a completely different naïve quality and that was what she really wanted... wasn’t it?

~

It wouldn’t be long before Robbie became a fully-fledged teenager. His thirteenth birthday was fast approaching and Claire wondered if his attitude, although enduring everything at the moment, might change if he saw himself as more grown up. As it stood he was accepting of his more juvenile status (though perhaps not quite aware that’s what it was) and appeared not to be overly concerned with not only having to wear nappies but also shorts that emphasised his size and stature.

From the beginning of all this, his forced protection had never looked out of place on his boyish body. Even now, as he stood on the balcony overlooking the pool and chatting excitedly to dad, the fact he was only wearing a nappy and plastic pants, didn’t seem to worry him. Meanwhile, his mum thought he’d never looked better... all glossy and animated like a little padded Super Hero.

It was easy to think of him as being a lot younger, helped of course by his new clothing. The thing was, once Thomas had got Robbie to wear a nappy, and whether Robbie thought it or not, his defiance rapidly disappeared. Of course he argued but it became less intense very quickly. Almost instantly he became a little less cocksure, a little more attentive and quite a lot less obnoxious to not only his parents but to neighbours, friends and family. It had been amazing how many people noticed and commented on their son’s surprising change (for the better). What they didn’t know was that it was all driven by the fact he was wearing a nappy – that had focused his mind and made him think about his insolence. Well, that was Claire’s interpretation of events. However, at the time, she didn’t know about the big guilty secret that Robbie carried. So, like when he was made to take a dump in his padding, it was a weight he’d rather not have to carry but there was no alternative.

“You’re crippling the boy psychologically” she couldn’t shake that statement. As she pondered on it a whole array of memories came flooding back from when he was a baby. The fact that he wasn’t an easy birth and the doctors had said she was unlikely to conceive again. She regarded Robbie as a precious gift to be cherished.

She’d adored everything about being a mother; the nappies, the feeds, the sweet purity of a little baby that relied on you for everything. Those first steps, the sweet little clothes, the potty training that took a while but when he succeeded, the lovely cute little underpants he chose to wear as he ran around the house. She remembered nothing but tenderness and happiness until so recently when he seemed to just turn. To begin with it was just a look of ‘daring’ she saw in his eyes but, as time went on, she could see the worry, anger and fear, although it was never spoken of, his few ‘unacknowledged’ damp nights and soggy undies, all added to her apprehension.

Claire was emotionally filling up as all these memories came flooding into her head, so how could anyone accuse her of crippling her boy psychologically she had done nothing but love him and wanted him to love her and his father like he used to do... was that so awful?

She knew those who condemned her were wrong but it hurt that they thought she was cruel and didn’t understand her boy’s development. She did understand it but thought an alternative course was wrong and destructive. She didn’t want to let him slide into being antisocial or even criminal. In her opinion doing nothing would have shown a lack of care and totally the wrong thing to do.

Still, that criticism stung.

~ tbc ~

Part 10

Over the next few days, despite trying her best to be her usual upbeat self, Claire poured over everything that had happened since that first day of the school holidays when the decision to do something about Robbie was put into action. For the casual observer nothing had changed but Thomas noticed her preoccupation but wasn’t too sure why. She still insisted her ‘sweet boy’ wore a nappy at all times, and didn’t get any kick-back or argument from him. In fact, if anything, Robbie gave the impression to have settled even more into his padded circumstances.

Over the next couple of days they spent more time on the beach than lying by the pool. Robbie preferred it as he was able to involve himself with others his age in plenty of games which sprang up all over the place. A couple of people smirked at his choice of (uncool) swimwear but that didn’t stop him from joining in any game of footie he could find. Playing on sand required a different skill from playing on turf so Robbie, although on his school team, was really only a beginner compared to those who played regularly on the beach. Still, the friends he made were fun, even if they didn’t always speak the same language.

It was at one of these times, when Robbie was some distance away on the beach immersed in a game where there were four of them chucking and catching a frisbee that Thomas enquired as to why his wife was so pensive.

“Oh, it’s nothing love?” She tried to deny there was any problem as she slapped on a little more suntan lotion.

“Claire,” he looked her in the eye, “you don’t get away with that as an answer so, what is it?” He was insistent and she knew he wouldn’t stop badgering her unless she told him what was on her mind.

“Well, I think I’ve done something stupid.” She flushed in the already fiercely hot air. “I, erm, I started writing a little blog for one of the social groups I’m involved with...”

“Okay, so, what about?” he nodded in support.

She thought about it for a few seconds, “Errmm, Robbie... and his return to wearing nappies and why we decided on such treatment.”

“WHAT... why is this the first I’m hearing about it?” Thomas asked annoyed.

“Well, I only started it the day before we left to come here... and I’ve recently seen the comments from those who’ve read it.”

“Okay, okay, so what have they said?”

“Most of it seems positive but there were some who thought we were damaging him... psychologically.” She looked away a little embarrassed.

“And it’s those comment that have you feeling the way you are?”

She nodded resignedly.

He thought about it for a little while. “Well, the main question is... do YOU think we’re damaging him in that way?”

“Not really, simply because of how he’s reacted to wearing them. There’s no defiance just acceptance and look,” she pointed to him down on the beach charging around with a bunch of new friends laughing and having fun. “It doesn’t appear to have stopped him from joining in has it?”

“Well then,” he patted his wife’s hand in solidarity, “we’ve seen a great improvement in his attitude and we have a more considerate son than we had so, all in all, I think we should be happy the way things are going.”

He kissed his wife’s cheek.

“I think you... sorry... we, are doing a good job and I think we’ll know when it’s time to change things. At the moment, I think he is still learning there are consequences to his actions and although it might not be to every one of your reader’s taste... we are getting results without the recourse of psychologists, doctors or drugs.” Where this last bit of support for Claire came from he wasn’t sure but he was certain that it must have come up in whatever those replies suggested.

“Stop worrying love,” he smiled, “it’s working and I can’t see him any the worse for the actions we’ve taken.” He paused, “Now can you rub some more of that suntan lotion into my back please?”

She grabbed the bottle, and grateful for his support, began to rub the oily substance into her hubby’s broad shoulders. It had been a relief to talk about what had been concerning her and his support and positivity had been most reassuring. She looked down the beach and saw her son happily splashing away at the water’s edge. It also looked like he was managing to get a ride with a few others on one of the many colourful pedalos about to embark on a journey out at sea. She knew that his disposable would have expanded quite a lot by now but it didn’t seem to be inhibiting him from wading deeper into the ocean. His neoprene trunks doing a fine rubbery job of keeping everything contained... or so she hoped. 

She smiled contentedly – her boy was doing fine.

~

Robbie could feel the water expanding his padding under his trunks. He’d already made up his mind to ignore it but, if something was said, and remembering the warning to always tell the truth or suffer the (unknown) consequences, thought he was fairly safe waist-deep in the ocean from too many questions being asked. He’d noticed that one or two people he met looked like they were on the verge of asking a question but seemed to think better of it. Of course, it might have had nothing to do with his nappy and more to do with his juvenile looks (which in the majority of cases it was because he insisted that he was nearly thirteen but everyone reckoned he wasn’t even ten) still, he was mixing with others and having what he hoped he’d get from the holiday – friends and fun.

It seemed strange that although he’d noticed Anna and Leo around the pool since that first afternoon, Karl had been nowhere to be seen. Thankfully, the hotel was full of all types and ages of kids so, some approached him to get an event going and at other times, he’d just join in whilst getting swept up in the general chaos of a game. He’d bumped into Darren on a few occasions; they’d swam in the pool or played in the hotel’s sports room, which had air hockey, pinball, basketball games and several screens for video games. All of which, even on the hottest days, proved very popular with a whole host of kids. Like the pool, it was another area you could rely on to be a hive of activity and a place to make new friends.

Claire and Amanda had quickly become firm friends and could often be found in deep conversation, so, Thomas and John were often left to share the duty of keeping an eye on the boys, which made nipping off for a sneaky pint difficult. Robbie and Darren were often to be seen sunning themselves or playing together but the trouble was, when he was with Darren it didn’t look like there was a great deal of difference in their age so tended to attract younger kids to them. This in turn led them to all group together if they went to the beach or play in the pool so Robbie was regarded as one of them and not a teen. The two mums were pleased with their friendship but to keep his mum happy Robbie didn’t complain, although was always relieved when that particular family and his went their separate ways.

Darren was besotted with Robbie. He loved having an older friend, it was like having the brother he never had so would often search Robbie out whenever he could. There were times when they were virtually dressed alike that it was spooky, but which both mums found quite endearing.

At one point, when they just happened to be together Darren had said he’d like to go to the Kids Disco as he loved to dance. His mum said that she couldn’t supervise him so the answer was unfortunately “No”. Immediately, and without any consultation with him, Claire offered Robbie as his chaperone. Before Robbie had chance to react Darren’s eyes lit up in excitement, “That would be great... thanks Robbie”. Claire, Amanda, Thomas and John - all expectant eyes were on Robbie, it would, after all, give both couples a few hours away from their kids but Robbie just shrugged. “I don’t think it’s for me really do you?”

Claire was a bit miffed that he didn’t want to do his friend such a favour and gave him a look that made Robbie rethink his position. “Erm, but, well, I suppose it’ll be okay,” he agreed half-heartedly.

Amanda was quickly in “Well that is very nice of you Robbie... your mother has said what a very thoughtful and understanding lad you are. Thank you.”

~

So, that was why, in the afternoon, the two boys dressed in t-shirt and shorts appeared at the club where a hoard of kids from toddlers to pre-teens had gathered and the music was already pumping out some Euro classics. The floor was full of gyrating, twerking, jumping and generally wriggling kids having a great time.

Under his shorts Robbie was of course wearing a disposable with a pair of clear thick plastic pants holding it all in. Unfortunately, as they arrived at the noisy disco Robbie realised that he needed to go to the toilet but was determined not to fill his nappy whilst in amongst so many others. He was also keen not to dance in case his padding could be seen by anyone else.

Darren threw himself into the dancing straight away when he spotted a group of girls he’d played with before. They were overjoyed to have a popular boy in their little group and kept calling Robbie over to come and join in as well. He took some persuading but eventually, after one particular girl came and took his hand, he was on the dancefloor but wasn’t a particularly good dancer. He may have been a sensation on the football pitch but in this awkward environment he settled to just shrug and waggle to the beat.

He noticed Anna and Leo on the dancefloor so looked around for Karl though he wasn’t to be seen. In fact, it looked like Anna was acting as one of the supervisors as she wore a lanyard that had volunteer written on it in several languages. At one point he saw her hand in hand with a toddler and they wandered off to a room at the back of the hall. He didn’t see them return although he did spot Anna later and couldn’t get over how pretty she looked; especially as her boobs were very pronounced under the tight pink t-shirt she was wearing. Robbie was quite enthralled watching her as she seemed to have a smile, wave or word with any and everyone who needed help or encouragement. She’d organised a little group of toddlers near the stage who were enjoying what may well have been their first taste of disco. As he watched her he began to wonder if because he was often seen in Darren’s company Karl had maybe sought out older boys to hang with.

The hotel was very conscious of the requirements of their young guests so there was a constant flow of free water and sodas, as well as snacks of nuts, crisps, pretzels and a few assorted other savoury and sweet titbits. Robbie didn’t realise just how much he’d drunk until he felt a surprising spurt into his suddenly warming disposable. Once that started he found it hard to stop but the thirsty padding seemed eager to soak everything up. It had been a bit of a shock as to how easily and quickly once the flow started it just happened. Pretty soon it was full and his shorts were bulging and could feel the wetness gathering around his privates. As things expanded he sat down hoping his shorts would hold until the end of the disco session. Unfortunately, he was in demand as another cute little girl grabbed his hand and dragged him to his feet. He couldn’t just shrug her off as Anna was close by and didn’t want to appear a monster to her, so, simply got up and hoped for the best.

~

A few minutes later Robbie was surprised when a voice behind him spoke over the loud music. “Bist du nass, brauchst du Abwechslung?”

He’d been crouching down as the little girl had dropped something and was almost in tears because she couldn’t find it under the flashing lights. Robbie was scrabbling around helping to look for whatever it was so completely distracted when he noticed who’d spoken to him.

Anna’s face had a look of concerned helpfulness about it but Robbie was so stunned by her appearance he just froze. He wanted to be all cool and in control but his throat went dry, which was the complete opposite as a nervous and uncontrolled extra spurt of pee joined his already soaked padding. No words would come out he was struck dumb and could hardly look into her beautiful eyes that he’d so wanted to...

She waited for a moment but decided the poor boy was shy. “Oh Schatz, sei nicht schüchtern... folge mi,” and held out her hand for him to take. The music was too loud to make much sense of what had been said but even so Robbie was struck dumb.

“Ermmm, uuumm, mmmm,” was all he could summon as he was guided off the dancefloor. He saw the little girl squeal in happiness because she had what she’d dropped returned by another of her friends.

Seeing as he wasn’t needed anymore and feeling that a few moments with the lovely Anna might prove fruitful, he let himself be led away. In his head she was about to make him a man (whatever that meant) or at least get a first kiss from such a beautiful and sophisticated girl (woman). He wasn’t thinking straight and was hardly aware of the childish waddle his full nappy gave him. He was even more excited as she guided him into what appeared to be the handicapped toilet and felt a stirring in anticipation.

A light came on and he saw to his dismay a changing table and a pile of colourful childish disposables. This was not what he was expecting but Anna’s charm and gentle insistence meant he had no escape.

“Ich lasse keinen Jungen nass bleiben, wenn wir viele schöne Windeln haben ...” Anna said as she eased down his shorts and effortlessly pushed him up onto the table.

He was stunned and excited at what was happening but there was absolutely no resistance, the fact he was wearing a wet nappy had completely deserted him.

His plastic pants were tight, which displayed that the well-soaked disposable underneath was in urgent need of changing.

“Jetzt müssen Sie sich keine Sorgen machen. Ich habe viel Erfahrung und bin mir sicher, dass deine Mama nicht möchte, dass du in einer so nassen Windel herumläufst...”

His entire body flushed bright red. Was this it? Was this the moment when she... oh no the nappy. As the truth of what was about to happen struck him he was too nervous to put up any opposition or even say anything. Anna took this lack of fight as shy consent of a young boy who was used to others taking control. She pulled down the thick restraining plastic pants to join his shorts around his ankles but didn’t remove them completely. She then pulled on the tapes and released the thick wet material before grabbing a handful of wipes to begin the clean-up.

The truth suddenly dawned but as a result Robbie was finding it hard to breath, let alone speak, so simply closed his eyes and hoped for the entire embarrassing ordeal to soon be over. All the while Anna was offering sweet compliments and encouragement in German because for some reason she thought he was just another shy young German boy since she’d seen her brother talking with him earlier in the week.

After the thorough wipe around and a dollop of cream plus a flurry of powder she pulled one of the disposables from the pile, flapped it out and gently fed it under Robbie’s pale bottom. She pulled it up snugly between his legs and fastened the tabs, then smoothed it out to make sure it fit properly. “Das wird euch alle schön und gemütlich machen, Schatz... sagt eurer Mama, dass Anna das für euch getan hat.” She added as she shuffled his thick clear plastic pants back into place and helped him off the table.

Robbie was very embarrassed about the entire operation because it wasn’t what he expected... or wanted. The woman he craved for had just changed his nappy so would only now see him as a nappy-wearing little kid and not the sophisticated teen he hoped she’d fall for when they were eventually introduced by Karl.

Once satisfied all was contained she pulled up his shorts and checked they were dry. Having patted him and smoothed everything down she guided him out of the room and back into the club where everything continued as if nothing had happened.

He turned to look at her and there was nothing but empathy, understanding and a lovely smile. Her tight t-shirt looked even perkier but his desire had disappeared. Robbie was caught in not knowing what to say or do... it had been quite surreal but a dry nappy was certainly better than the soaked one he’d been contending with. However, that smile was also something that couldn’t be ignored so he used the only German word he knew.

“Danke” he whispered bashfully and almost imperceptibly.

She patted his freshly padded bottom and added “Du siehst so süß aus” as he saw Darren standing with his mum and dad on the edge of the dancefloor. He hoped they didn’t know what had just happened.

He wandered over to them and finding his voice and by way of explanation said, “Hi, erm, just been to the loo”.

“No trouble Robbie, thanks for keeping an eye on him for us.” Mrs Carpenter nodded to an exhausted looking Darren who, despite many reservations, hadn’t stopped dancing since they’d arrived. The music was not as loud as it had been and it looked like the whole thing was winding down as parents seemed to be coming to collect their offspring. “We’re off to get some ice cream now... I think your parents aren’t back yet... so you can come with us... as a thank you.”

What was actually happening back up on the top floor was they were enjoying a few hours of grown up time and didn’t want Robbie back for another hour. Amanda and John put their arms around both boys and guided them out of the cool foyer and onto the warm street in search of a gelaterias they’d heard about that did over fifty flavours. They looked at the clock it was just after 4pm and the Carpenters had promised the Davisons they wouldn’t return their son until six.

Reluctantly Robbie had to spend even more time with Darren who thought this the best day of his life and certainly the best day ever of his holiday - he was having just the best of times.

Meanwhile, Robbie was reflecting on what Anna had just done and his reaction to it. He didn’t know why he hadn’t objected. He didn’t know why she just took him to one side and changed him. He knew he needed it; his nappy was soaked but couldn’t make head nor tail of the sequence of events and his complete inaction to it. He was almost thirteen for heaven sake and had been in a gang, yet when it came down to the stunning Anna, and his guilty nappy, he did nothing - he’d simply frozen.

Now she knew, so there was no way to change that fact. Would she tell Karl about having to change his little nappy-wearing English friend? He was sure that her job was to just keep an eye on the little kids, and perhaps change their nappies if needed, so why had she noticed him? He wished he could speak German and then he’d know what she’d said to him. He also wished he’d refused BUT had his parents brainwashed him to such an extent that getting his nappy changed was more important than anything else? He just wasn’t sure. It was a difficult thing to rationalise but it had happened and there was nothing he could do to make it unhappen.

Still, he’d been in the very capable hands of the lovely Anna, so surely that was something? But to her was he just a wet little kid who needed a nappy change or had she really wanted to get to know him and that was a way to do so? Of course he was fooling himself and trying desperately to find some kind of positive as far as his inaction was concerned.

Robbie furtively ran his hand over his shorts checking the bulk of the new disposable. It felt different from the ones his mother used, possibly a bit thicker but softer and quite comfy. So, now he had a fresh nappy on and no one was any the wiser he considered that a huge ice cream sundae might be a decent reward for the weirdness of his afternoon.

~

When Robbie eventually returned to the top floor room at just a little after six he found mum and dad on the balcony. They both looked pleased with themselves and very relaxed although mum especially had a bit of a glow about her. Robbie put this down to some knew ‘tinted’ Aftersun she’d recently bought. Dad was drinking from a bottle of beer, whilst mum was giggling and sipping a glass of sparkling white wine.

“Did you have a good time sweetie?” Mum asked as she patted her son’s bottom as he took a chair next to her. “There’s juice and stuff in the fridge if you want something.” She waved in the general direction of the small kitchenette area.

“No, I’m fine thanks, had a nice big ice cream with Darren and his parents and then we sat on the beach and watched a few games of volleyball, there was some kind of tournament going on.” He looked to his dad who for some reason was avoiding making eye contact.

“What was the disco like... many there?”

“It was full of kids,” Robbie shrugged dismissively.

“Wasn’t that the idea,” dad wondered.

“Yes, but, they were all little...”

“Did Darren enjoy himself?” Mum enquired.

“He loved it, was up most of the time dancing with some of his little mates.”

“Did you get a go?”

“Erm, s’pose so, a few girls wanted me to join in.”

“Well, that was good... I bet you were...”

“Yer, it was okay,” he wanted to change the subject before he was forced to tell them about Anna. “Did you go far?”

“It’s been a very pleasant afternoon but I’m sure we didn’t have as much fun as you.” Dad smirked, which was missed by Robbie, “But the volleyball tournament sounds interesting.” Dad took another swig from his bottle.

“Are you wet love?” Mum reached over and lifted the leg of Robbie’s shorts then slid a finger between the disposable and plastic pants.

“Muummm,” he wriggled indignantly, “I’m fine... and dry... what have you two been up to... anything nice?”

“Oh we kept ourselves busy,” dad smirked knowingly at his wife, “but I think we’ve found a great place to eat tonight down on the beach front.” They hadn’t but it was a slight distraction from letting Robbie ask too many questions.

“Can I go swimming,” Robbie said hopefully, looking down on the pool from his bird’s-eye view and noticed, despite the shadows creeping across it, that Karl was down there with a bunch of other lads.

“We’ll be getting ready to go out soon. How about leaving it until tomorrow and we’ll spend the day by the pool if you prefer that to the beach.” Mum consoled his disappointment. “Just sit quietly with us and relax for a few moments, this cool breeze is very nice.”

With the sun no longer shining directly onto their balcony the shade was very welcome. A fresh breeze that had just started up was a pleasant relief to the stifling heat of the day so the three of them spread out and unwound and dozed for an hour. Robbie from dancing and the exhausting walk along the seafront, mum and dad from their physical exertions.

~

“C’mon sweetheart, let’s get you ready.” Mum was gently coaxing Robbie awake.

He hadn’t realised he’d dropped off so had no idea what time it was but it was already getting dark on the horizon.

“Dad’s in the bathroom but,” she patted his slightly billowing padding, “I think you need a change so do you need to use your nappy for anything else before I change you?”

“Erm, I don’t think so.” He wriggled feeling confused because his padding did feel quite full.

“Okay then, let’s get you out of that nappy, which must be well soaked by now and into something nice and dry, hmmm?”

He wandered over to the changing mat that was already set out on his bed, with a pile of disposables and a new pair of plastic pants on the floor. Wipes, powder and a large canister of anti-rash cream were also stacked nearby so mum reached out and pulled down his shorts. She stepped back in amazement when she saw what he was wearing.

“Well love, these certainly weren’t what you were wearing when you set off... what happened.” She was rubbing the well-bloated unfamiliar disposable through his clear plastic pants.

When he looked down it was the first time he noticed what Anna had put him in because he’d kept his eyes closed all the way through that change. He could make out the childish animals that were pushing against the plastic cover.

“Well love,” his mother smiled but was surprised, “these are lovely and thick and, well...” she didn’t want to say adorable, “very nice and seem to have done the job admirably but when were you changed?”

The colourful smiling yellow giraffe that occupied the front was in the company of equally happy-looking lions, zebras and gawky ostriches. The entire bloated piece of immature underwear was quite the delight and was obviously of a much higher quality then the brand she usually used. Strangely, she felt a bit envious and wondered where they were bought.

Then came the question he was dreading.

“Who changed you, hmmmmm?”

~

He didn’t want to tell the tale but saw no way of explaining how he came into the possession of such a different piece of padding, so told her the story. Although he missed the bit about him fancying the beautiful young German volunteer.

Once he finished telling her she asked if he’d thanked her for making him dry and comfortable, which he said he had.

“Well then, you point her out to me next time you see her... or I can ask at reception... as I want to thank her as well.”

Seeing a way out of them ever meeting “Erm, she only spoke German to me so...”

“Well, even so, she must be a wonderful person to notice your distress, a full nappy and still take on changing a boy your size... yes... a truly nice and thoughtful individual.”

Robbie reluctantly nodded as he was cleaned up and fitted into a fresh plain blue disposable and had equally pale blue plastic pants pulled up over them. His mum passed him a pink polo shirt and navy blue shorts and said he was ready and they just needed dad to finish and then they’d be off for some dinner. The walk to the restaurant they’d chosen not being that far.

~

Almost as if it had been preordained the first person they saw in the foyer was Anna who waved at Robbie.

“Who’s that?” Mum enquired.

Hesitantly he told her exactly who it was so mum went over to thank her for her thoughtfulness. Meanwhile, while Claire chatted away dad and Robbie stood looking at the noticeboard with up and coming events. Robbie was burning up in embarrassment but dad kept him occupied with small talk and asked him about maybe getting a jet-ski the following day... they were looking at a brochure for that at the time.

“That would be cool dad, I’ve seen a few available at the far end of the beach near the pedalos.” There was excitement in his voice as he hoped dad wouldn’t change his mind. 

After a good ten minutes mum returned smiling and full of enthusiasm for Anna. “Well what a lovely, lovely girl she is, well, young woman really.”

“Can we go eat now please.” Robbie asked desperate to move on from his blushing humiliation.

“Yes, but you know, that girl volunteers to help out whenever she comes here and has done since she was a little girl. The receptionist said they don’t know what they’d do without her. She helps with all the children because that’s what she wants to be... a paediatric nurse... isn’t that wonderful... on holiday but still wants to help?”

“Mum, please.”

“Okay Robbie but I think that’s quite selfless and I thanked her for changing you and she hoped I didn’t mind. Of course I told her that she can change you any time if you need it and she said...”

“I thought she only spoke German” Robbie interrupted.

“Good heavens no... she spoke better English than many of the people on our street back home,” she laughed at her own joke. “No, no she was a delight... told me where to get those lovely disposables that looked so fetching on you.” Giving Robbie a look because she knew he’d be embarrassed at the idea of wearing such an item again. Having said that, Claire thought it might be fun to put him in them occasionally... just for the joy of it.

What she didn’t know was, that, although he would hate to admit it, the animal disposables were thicker and more comfortable to wear, which had been quite a surprise that he even thought about padding in such a way.

“C’mon you two,” mum said slinging her large bag over her shoulder, “let’s go eat I’m starving.”

~

The following day Robbie got to fulfil one of his dreams when dad rented a jet-ski. He was a little disappointed that he wasn’t allowed to drive one on his own because of an age restriction, but as mum definitely didn’t want to sit on the back, Robbie was all too keen. For almost twenty minutes they zoomed around the ocean at top speed, weaving around obstacles and avoiding other sea-going people and inflatables. It was such an adrenalin rush for both father and son. They came off it promising to do it again at some future date and found Claire happily watching, whilst taking it easy on a sun lounger with a huge umbrella keeping the heat of the day at bay.

There was no doubt that much of the sea had been soaked up by Robbie’s disposable hidden (although now quite obvious) under his neoprene shorts and mum wondered about a change if he was going to sunbathe for a while.

“No thanks mum, I’ll want to go back in the sea if I get too hot so I’ll wait and maybe we can do it later.”

“Okay,” his mum was quite surprised but pleased at the way he simply accepted his padding had expanded and didn’t seem bothered. In fact, the rubbery shorts were quite good at containing the expansion and, apart from a slight bit of fabric jutting above the waistband, it didn’t seem too bad. After stuffing it back out of sight she was pleased the way he settled down to just lie out on the towel and toast himself; he was getting a very nice tan without getting burned.

In fact, as Claire contemplated on the way things were going, she’d noticed just how much Robbie had taken to heart their discussions on the first day – he could argue and end up having a terrible holiday or embrace the way things had been decided and have a terrific holiday – he appeared to have settled on the latter. Despite the occasional hic-cup things now didn’t seem to faze him. Even his messy morning nappy changes were performed with the least bit of opposition. Now they’d got into a routine things worked smoothly.

The only fly in the ointment was the continued avalanche of replies and comments on her web page. Somehow, the argument had got out of hand and there was more bitter criticism and outrageous, but unwelcome, support. In many ways she was happy that Thomas and her had not resorted to some of the vicious or unwholesome actions that too many of the respondents had detailed.

~

In her conversation with Anna Claire had discovered that her son was quite happy dancing around with a bunch of ‘other’ eight year olds (she didn’t tell Anna his real age) but when she noticed his windel (nappy) and that it looked full, she waited for an appropriate time to ask if he wanted a change. As he shyly nodded she thought he was a little German boy because she’d seen her brother talking with him a few days earlier so simply spoke German to him.

“Have you changed many twe... erm... boys Robbie’s age... didn’t he seem a little big to you?” Claire wanted as much information as possible.

“I babysit back home and there are plenty of boys and girls of all ages that need to be looked after. I don’t make a judgement, if they wear such an item it’s because they need to wear one and as such it is my job to make sure they are treated nicely and they aren’t left in wet or uncomfortable clothing when there’s no need.”

For a sixteen year old Claire thought Anna was very mature and sensible and was actually quite proud of her even though they’d only just met. As she was surprised to hear, her English was perfect but with an accent, which for some reason, was very reassuring. They chatted some more and she explained that he was not unlike her shy little brother Leo who also still needed to wear protection.

Anna went on to tell her what happened and that, when she held out her hand for him to take he was blushing. She knew that most boys that age are very shy of older girls but he seemed happy to accompany her to the baby changing room and, although self-conscious, made no objection when she pulled down his shorts and began the clean-up.

“Didn’t he protest at all?” Claire had asked incredulously.

“He was a little sweetheart. He closed his eyes and perhaps pretended it wasn’t happening but showed no dissent. In fact, I thought he enjoyed having such heavy damp padding changed.” Her forthrightness and care for the ‘little ones’ was backed by an accepting and nurturing nature. “It couldn’t have been very comfortable walking, or dancing around with that heavy weight hanging between his legs.”

As far as Claire was concerned, the fact that this had happened was really quite amazing. Someone other than Thomas or her had managed to change his nappy without any kick-back or tantrum. He was a twelve, almost thirteen year-old boy and she’d never known him be shy about anything. So, did wearing a nappy make him now see himself as a little lad who knew he needed help by anyone when it came to his flooded padding?

With that revealing conversation still being turned over in her head she looked down on her snoozing, well rubbed in suntan lotion, laid out son, and perhaps she wasn’t the only one who saw him as an innocent little boy. Not only that but he looked contented. If it was possible, he’d grown into his nappy rather than out of it and that pleased her no end. It was as if those people who criticised her were being proved wrong and she knew exactly what she was doing - the evidence was lying next to her in the balmy Portuguese air.

Five minutes later Thomas returned from checking out a kiosk that was offering day trips out to see dolphins, which he thought might be fun... if the weather stayed calm. Claire, now covered with her large straw hat, looked up happily at her husband. As he lay out on the lounger next to her she took hold of his hand and sighed with satisfaction - she was with her perfect family so all was well.

~ tbc ~

Part 11

Later, when they’d made their way for lunch at a beachside café where -sardines, tapas and drinks - were proudly displayed on their boardwalk noticeboard, the Davisons bumped into the Carpenters and an afternoon session of wine and beer seemed to be quite a possibility. Meanwhile, after they’d eaten Robbie and Darren were forced together once more, not that the younger boy was complaining, he loved to spend time with his ‘adopted older brother’. Robbie, wearing a very wet disposable under his rubber trunks, played in the sand helping his friend, who was wearing the tiniest pair of nylon Speedos, build a huge sandcastle.

Whilst the grown-ups drank and chatted the two boys were energetically beginning to build a miniature town. Quite unintentionally, Robbie got quite into the fun of designing and building on the fine sandy beach. They’d found a discarded plastic bucket and spade near a rubbish bin and, together with their hands used them to expand their ‘empire’. From where their mums and dads sat, all they could see was two young boys having fun, one with quite a cushion in his trunks, the smaller of the two looking quite pink from the sun.

Needless to say, with all the squirming, wriggling and scooting around on their knees, Robbie’s trunks eventually succumbed to the pressure and from both his leg holes and waistband the expanded disposable material began to appear.

“Oh Robbie,” whispered Darren, “what’s that sticking out your trunks?”

Robbie looked down and became aware of just how much of his padding was visible.

“Erm, oh, erm, nothing...” Although with his nicely tanned body no one could see him blush.

It was a strange feeling that in the heat of the day, this one question sent a cold shiver through his body. It was also the moment of truth. He’d never had to admit to anyone that he wore a nappy. It had quickly become second nature to him and even though the padding was at times inconvenient, it was better than admitting his guilty secret. However (and remembering the instruction from mum to always tell the truth), he felt he had no option but to nervously and reluctantly accept that perhaps the best kept family secret was no longer that.

“It looks like a nappy.” Darren looked inquisitively and a little surprised but pushed for an answer. “Is it a nappy? Do you wear a nappy?”

Fearing there was no way out of this discussion without a huge explanation he simply nodded.

“Why?” Came the innocent question, whilst gazing at the seeping fabric that Robbie had given up trying to stuff back under his trunks.

“Well, erm, mum and dad says it will stop me from being... erm, naughty.” He looked into his young friend’s wide eyes and shrugged.

“Oh, have you been naughty?” Darren wondered inoffensively.

“Yer, very,” Robbie confessed and felt even more flushed, “so, I have to wear this all the time.” He didn’t explain any further but pushed at a bit of the sodden fabric that was down his leg hole.  

“You won’t tell anyone will you?” Robbie queried sheepishly.

Of course he could have threatened him into silence as that’s what his gang back home would have done but in truth it wouldn’t have seemed fair, the lad was only curious.

Anyway Darren simply shook his head “No” as he started to pile sand around his legs as if this revelation was of no real interest whatsoever.

This was a huge time for Robbie to add to the day before getting his nappy changed by someone else (and by a girl he so wanted to get to know better but not through that) and the first time he’d admitted to anyone that he was always well-padded.

He was glad that despite what could be seen, or the jokes and accusations that could be made, his young mate had no follow up questions. Darren just said “Oh” and nodded as if his curiosity was satisfied and they carried on with their interrupted great sandy development.

~

Robbie looked over at the two sets of grown-ups laughing and joking and in deep conversation so reckoned his secret was probably not so secret anymore anyway.

After about thirty minutes of construction they were both getting pretty hot in the early afternoon sun so, with a quick word to their tipsy mums and dads, disappeared down to the sea for a splash around and to cool off.

Strangely, Robbie was impressed by how understanding Darren was being. He may be only eight years old but surely he’d have some taunting comment or sarcastic response to the news but no, it appeared to make no difference. They stayed in the sea for quite some time, swimming under water and trying to keep their eyes open to see the small darting brown fish or diving between each other’s legs.

Robbie’s padding was completely waterlogged and his pants bulged out but he’d managed a surreptitious pee in the ocean, so was feeling pretty good about himself. Darren was proving to be a lively friend and although he was no footballer, he seemed to have an affinity to the sea and swam around like he was part dolphin.

A ball splashed next to them and Robbie threw it back and before they knew it, they were involved in a game with another group of kids their age.

~

Later, Thomas came looking for them to say they were heading back to the hotel. As the boys waved to their new friends they also noticed that a family with two toddlers, one in Minion swimming trunks and the other in an all over protective swimsuit with Nemo motif, had taken over their sandy structure and were eagerly adding to it. They both smiled to think that their initial building might inspire these little boys.

As the two families walked back along the promenade, the two women chatting, the two men pointing out various things and Darren and Robbie in front planning on going in the pool when they got back, the return journey to the Atlantico seemed to take only moments.

As they neared the hotel the two families split to go their separate ways and Claire took the opportunity to tell Robbie that she’d change him as soon as they got back up to their room.

“Sweetheart, from the looks of things that nappy isn’t going to take much more punishment. Let me get you out of that and into something a bit more comfortable, eh?”

“But mum, I want to go in the pool, erm, I’ve arranged to meet Darren there so...”

“Hmmm,” his mum was thoughtful, “look love, you’ve had plenty of sun today already. I don’t want you burnt to a crisp because your tan is coming along quite nicely and we don’t want you to start shedding skin like that man we saw down on the beach now do we?”

That had been a horrible sight; the man was bright red, with huge white areas under his arms and legs, but his shoulders and bald head were peeling quite dramatically, though despite that, he still laid out in the sun.

“S’pose not... but what about Darren, he might be down there on his own.”

“Well sweetie, your dad and I will be staying up on the balcony but, if you want, you can go and sit down by the pool... but in the shade. I think you’ve had enough sun and swimming for one day and there’s always tomorrow don’t forget. You can take a book or something, er, they have a selection of stuff in that little reading room off from reception area. I’m sure you’ll find something there.”

“OK” he replied a little reluctantly.

“But first, let’s get you out of that soggy nappy you must be fed up with it by now.” She smiled as they entered the lift and ascended to the top floor.

Once in the room she quickly grabbed all the things needed and pulled down his damp trunks. His disposable was quite a mess and almost in tatters after the workout he’d given it.

“Not before time,” Claire acknowledged. “That can’t have been very pleasant playing around in this.” She held up the disintegrating piece of material, which incidentally was very warm from his body heat and the fact he’d just taken a relieving pee.

Robbie looked a bit sheepish but smiled when his mum tossed it aside and cleaned him up with cool wet wipes. He knew that wearing the disposable for such a length of time had made it bunch up and feel uncomfortable, what he wasn’t aware of, but mum noticed on the walk home, was the sweet little waddle it had given him. It seemed that with each passing day Robbie was adapting more and more and to be at ease with life in nappies.

He didn’t say a thing when she chose an animal print replacement pair and added the thick clear plastic pants. This was partly because he was glad to get out of the old ones, it had been rubbing various areas (and not in a good way) and knew how soft and comfy they would be. Claire was pleased he hadn’t reacted badly to the childish print because he looked so damn cute in them. With the plastic pants pulled over they looked like a nice, tight package and the smiling cartoon giraffe on the front was yet another thing that melted her heart and love her innocent boy even more.

She gazed at him for a few moments longer before that adorable view made her begin to tear up with motherly soppiness. With each nappy change she thought her sweet boy just couldn’t look any sweeter. She knew they made him look younger but they fitted perfectly and he wore them so well. To hide this fact she then scooted over to the shelves and pulled out a pair of thickish, grey and green camouflage polyester shorts and matching t-shirt. Robbie was surprised because it was actually something he may well have wanted himself. The shorts were just long enough to hide his padding and the top came down past the waistband so thought it looked pretty cool.

When he stood up, as always, she patted his agreeably padded bum and giggled that he was now her loveable little soldier. He didn’t mind because this was by far the best outfit she’d put him in and liked the way it looked, whilst the looseness hid his heavy padding.

“Good heavens,” dad exclaimed as he noticed him, “who’s declared war?”

“Daaaddd,” Robbie saluted joining in the joke and for the first time in ages was back to feeling like a twelve year old.

~

Claire and Thomas had noted that when playing with Darren he didn’t appear to hold the age difference against his younger friend, which, when they first met at the beginning of the holiday he’d seemed to adopt a reticence to speak with the boy. They were glad they were eventually getting along because the two sets of parents were also getting on famously. So, whilst the two dads had surprisingly found a common interest in gardening, Claire was draining Amanda even further about all she could tell her regarding homeschooling and the benefits of having her son at home.

Thomas was now in the homeschooling loop but as yet they hadn’t told Robbie of their plans because, well, although Thomas was reasonably well paid, they didn’t know whether they could lose Claire’s income as that might prove a bit too much in the way of belt-tightening. However, in a moment of physical exhaustion after sex when Claire had first broached the subject, Thomas had said that he wasn’t against the idea if they could make it work. The reason behind his support was that there was a very good chance, once they were back from vacation, he would be promoted and that would take care of all their immediate financial worries. Also, Claire might be able to undertake some work from home so things might not be as tight as they first thought. Thankfully, they’d know all about that before the start of the new school year so had time to plan things.

Thomas could see the excitement and determination in his wife’s eyes at the prospect of keeping her son away from the bad influences of the past year. He thought about the last few weeks since they’d put Robbie back in to nappies and how he’d changed, which both thought for the better. Her decision to pursue this line of punishment, no matter what the detractors online might say, appeared to be working well. She had never shirked from the extra work that keeping him in nappies produced, in fact, if anything, she’d revelled in it. To watch Robbie now meekly wear his thick protection without any comment was something he doubted he’d ever see. Of course he credited his wife with all of this change, he had no idea that Robbie himself and the deep guilt he felt, was the main driver of this reform to his character.

~

Meanwhile, Robbie had ventured in to the ‘library’ section of the hotel’s lobby and found an array of books in various languages. He looked through the selection but the ones with covers he thought he might like were in a language he couldn’t understand and the few English ones held little appeal. However, he did find a book called The Adventures of Captain Underpants that just didn’t fit in to the luxury aspect of the Atlantico. Nonetheless, the title sounded fun and relatable and, after flashing his colour-coded wristband at the barman and collecting one of the free bottles of cold sparkling water, carried it down to the side of the pool and found a little bit of shade. He took a long, much needed glug, and looked up to the top floor and saw mum peeking over the balcony checking he sat out of the sun. He waved and she waved back before disappearing from view so searched for a place to park himself.

The pool area was still very busy consequently there were only a few spare sun-loungers free of towels and swimwear, he couldn’t see Darren so settled down with his book. He’d just got himself comfy when he had a scare as unknown hands crept up behind and tickled his waist.

Robbie made a loud and embarrassing squeal of surprise and quickly spun around to see a giggling Karl looking really pleased he’d got such a reaction. There were a few people sitting nearby that peered at the two thinking one might be in some distress. Once they realised what was happening then it was smiles all around. Even Robbie, now on his feet, saw the funny side of it.

“Bloody hell Karl,” Robbie looked relieved once he saw who it was, “you scared the life out of me.”

The rather unexpected and intense tickle had made Robbie react, well his bladder at least, as it provoked a spurt of warm pee into his recently applied nappy. However, for the moment at least, he was more worried about the childishly girly scream the tickle attack had produced. He hoped his tickler, and those who were still laughing at him, would let that slide.

“Well, I haven’t seen you around for a few days and thought you might have forgotten me.” Karl smiled and plonked himself down on the next lounger. “Cool outfit,” he said admiring Robbie’s new camo gear.

“Oh, yer, thanks...” with the warmth now circulating in his disposable he suddenly remember that Karl’s sister had changed his nappy and wondered if she’d told him about it but, if she had, Karl didn’t mention it by way of initiating their conversation. “Mum and dad have had us exploring all over the place,” Robbie said by way of explanation as to why he hadn’t been around. “Have you been here at the pool all the time?”

Karl was only wearing those tight blue nylon Speedos like last time they met and was looking pretty near perfect as they relaxed next to each other to chat. For the next ten minutes or so they were busy catching up with what they’d both been up to and then Darren arrived wearing his tight little swimming trunks and settled at the other side of Robbie.

For a moment Robbie resented the eight year old being there but realised that he’d arranged to meet him so thought better of it and introduced them. The young boy was a bit nervous about this older looking lad but Karl was his usual chirpy self and said “Hi” and immediately included him in their small talk. Seemingly, Karl and his family had learned the art of being nice to everybody and making people feel at ease.

They chatted about Robbie’s choice of reading material, the cover showing a fat man wearing just a pair of y-fronts, which, searching around the pool they noticed several older men with huge bellies that fit the bill but one in particular could have been the man who posed for the cover of his book. All three were chortling at their discovery.

“Well Darren,” Karl said after a short while, “you look like you’re ready for a swim even if we can’t get our friend here in the water. As I’m schwitzen I’m off for a dip... you coming?”

An equally sweaty Darren seemed pretty keen to join the older boy in the pool. The two boys, wearing similar swimwear jumped in together. Both surfaced grinning, Darren with teeth chattering but both obviously glad of the refreshing water. Robbie sat there frustrated and a little jealous that he couldn’t just jump in himself but his thick damp nappy and plastic pants under his shorts wasn’t something he wanted to reveal... even if Darren already knew about them.

As he watched them swim and splash around, Karl was acknowledging quite a few other kids in the pool, Robbie wondered some more about whether Anna had told her brother about his nappy change. He totted the numbers up - that was her, Darren, and possibly his mum and dad, as well as his own parents who knew about his nappies. He didn’t know that the receptionist also knew but... who else?

As he sat watching his friends cooling off he relived the embarrassing encounter with Anna and felt a stirring in his nappy. His mind was swamped by her gentle touch, her fantastic body, the caring way she took hold of his hand, her boobs, her lovely encouraging smile and the thoroughness as she wiped away the residue of pee from around his cock, her touch, then pulling the disposable up between his legs to make sure it all fit. His cock was desperately trying to nudge its way to freedom under the damp material. He looked over to the far side of the pool and saw Karl climbing out, his soaked sheer Speedos hugging his bum and glistening in the sun...

He quickly grabbed the book and hoped that reading the exploits of Captain Underpants would distract him from... ooohhhh... too late.

He sat there all hot and bothered, he could’ve really done with taking a dip.

~

Up on the top floor Claire and Thomas were enjoying the shade that was just creepy onto their balcony and the gentle cool breeze that seemed to accompany it. They’d quite enjoyed the extended lunch time drinking and eating session with the Carpenters but were glad for some privacy as they settled onto their balcony loungers to relax.

At some point that day Thomas had advised his wife not to check on the comments to her article and enjoy their holiday without further upset. She’d said that was a good idea but, curiosity got the better of her and as hubby gently snoozed, she opened up her tablet and scrolled through the latest remarks.

‘You evil, self-serving, unthinking bitch’ was the first headline she encountered. The attack contained many of the criticisms she’d already received but seemed to parcel them up with even more venom than previously. Accusing her of untold damage to her son – making him piss and shit himself - and trying to babyfy him for her own desperate needs, whilst pointing out in a series of unflattering and withering terms that it wouldn’t stop her aging in any way.

The unedifying assault caused tears to form and dread that anyone could think that way. How could they say she wasn’t concerned about her son when that was what this was all about in the first place? However, such was the vehemence from this person, and even though they themselves received a vociferous attack, the dread that had rippled through Claire’s body meant that perhaps she detected some truth in the correspondent’s condemnation. She was so upset she went to cry in the bathroom so there was no chance of Thomas seeing her in such a state.

After a while, and with hubby still softly snoring on the balcony, she emerged puffy-eyed and sat on Robbie’s bed. Checking through all the clothes she’d bought him for this trip decided that even though she’d only purchased him shorts, there was nothing at all babyish. Well, that was apart from the actual pile of disposables and colourful nappy covers. There was also a couple of, as yet, unused cotton onesies that she’d hoped would fasten him into his nappy more comfortably because the snaps between his legs would hold it up and stop it from drooping when wet. One was pale blue the other was pale green and she’d paired them with matching elasticated loose-fitting shorts. She ran her hand over the soft fabric, then his t-shirts and ended up caressing the wonderful, soft material that made up his new disposables. She kept a positive internal dialogue by telling herself that what she and Thomas were doing was correct - Robbie was thriving. He looked better, behaved better, was more loving and involved in what was going on... and there were fewer and fewer complaints in either direction. Robbie had become a model young lad but, and this is what the spiteful criticism implied, at what cost?  

~

There was no doubt that this intense criticism had had an effect but there was something that she’d told Thomas that brought her back from the cusp of depression – “The poor boy is holding a huge secret and I think it’s terrifying him. We need to know what it is so we can be prepared to help if we can.” She had no idea what that might be but, call it a mother’s intuition if you like, she knew by the way he capitulated to this bizarre punishment, there must be a reason. She saw guilt written large across his face and subsequent actions had only gone to increase her assumption that it was because of something big. The fact that he’d admitted to so many wrong doings in the past few weeks but still, there was his unease that meant there was more. She wanted, no, needed to know what that was.

However, she had to acknowledge that ‘You know what you’ve done’ had mattered less and less as to the reason he was wearing nappies. It was after all a punishment for those nefarious activities over the past few months. She was trying to remember just why she’d made him use his nappy to such an extent but thought it would mean very little if he didn’t feel the full impact of what wearing padding meant. The fact that she was deriving some pleasure from it didn’t lesson the fact Robbie needed some kind of salvation and, although what they were doing was originally a rash approach, counterintuitively it had so far proved effective.

There was a knock on the door which she answered to find Robbie had returned from his trip poolside looking fed up and probably in need of a nappy change. Although his new camouflage outfit still looked pretty good on him.

“I’ll change you when we get ready to go out sweetie... you can last until then can’t you?”

“Yes mum, no problem,” he replied a little glumly. However, the last few minutes had seen him unexpectedly and nervously flood his padding when he saw Karl looking his way and Darren whispering something in his ear. He was certain that his little ‘friend’ was telling him about his recent discovery and when he saw Karl laugh, knew he’d revealed his secret. It was bad enough his sister knew but if Karl now knew then, with all the friends the young German seemed to have, realised it wouldn’t be long before the entire hotel knew as well. He felt a little depressed wondering what the rest of the holiday might be like.

~

“Mum, have you mentioned to the Carpenters that I wear nappies?” Robbie quietly asked as she was putting all his clothes back on the shelves.

She couldn’t help but detect the strain of anxiety that appeared to be in that simple question or his acceptance of actually mentioning his nappies. “No dear, why?”

“Well, Darren knows,” he sighed. “He noticed them when I was helping him build sandcastles (he didn’t mention that he’d instigated that particular project) so I admitted that I did... so... I just wondered if he told them would it come as a surprise...?” His voice trailed off.

“Well love, I’m pleased that you felt confident enough to tell you friend the truth and, did you ask him not to tell anyone?” She saw him nod that he had, “Well, I’m sure your secret’s safe but, even if he does mention it, I’m not sure that the Carpenters will be all that bothered... they seem a nice couple, indeed a nice family.”

“But, but, I think he’s just told my German friend Karl as I saw them, whispering and giggling and...”

There was no doubt that these days the way he questioned things had an uncertainty about them. She also couldn’t fail to notice that he even looked and sounded much younger and less confident than his twelve years when unsure. The poor lad was in need of mum and dad’s reassurance.

“Now sweetheart, don’t get yourself in a tizz. You don’t know what was being said you’re just assuming and that’s never a good idea. Wait and see how it all pans out before you get yourself in a state that might not be what you think.”

She was going to add that if it was what he thought then she was sure he’d manage to cope but knew that at that moment he wanted reassurance and not maybes.

She hugged him and patted (as anticipated) his soggy nappy and kissed the top of his head.

“You’ll be fine.” She tried again to reassure him, he smiled weakly back and hoped she was correct.

~

He wandered out onto the balcony and noticed his father snoozing, so settled himself next to him and began to think. His time in the gang had been both exciting and at times terrifying but now he realised that there was a lot more going on. He hadn’t realised that growing up was so hazardous; what with the increase in testosterone, choosing the wrong friends, being moody, being independent, yes, and of course, being in a gang... well... the guilt that had gone along with all that ‘stuff’ was a heavy responsibility. On top of that his cock had a mind of its own and he seemed to be coating his nappy more often than he ever thought he would.

That was another thing, he was almost thirteen and yet found he couldn’t defy his mother when she put him in a fresh nappy. How this had become normal, which was of course totally unacceptable, except, he had accepted the situation. He’d reasoned with himself that it was better than admit what he’d done (he kept telling himself this over and over again) but also, despite everything, he did feel closer to his family than he had done for quite some time. There was no doubt that the intimacy of having his mucky nappy changed by a loving parent had made him feel incredibly grateful for that love. There had been a huge shift in his perspective and what had seemed real and desirable when with the gang, now seemed quite the opposite. He hadn’t realised it, and perhaps his parents were also unaware of this other strange fact, the testosterone and whatever other hormones go into making a teenager... appear to have suppressed certain aspects of growing up simply by the addition of his nappy.

It had been such a strange thing to impose on him and yet, with each nappy change, and despite everything that yelled “WRONG” to him, he’d simply got used to it. Whereas a nappy had been an item to ridicule and fiercely battle against, his nappy was now a thing of affection and understanding. He had hated the weight and embarrassment but inexplicably found it comforting, a safety net to his bodily functions. There was no doubt that he was still confused by his feeling towards what his padding meant but not how his family felt about him. Over the last few days, he reasoned, that they may have gone about it in a completely weird way but there was no doubting that the sentiment behind it was his parents concern, yes, and love, for their wayward son.

Now others knew, and although it bothered him, he hadn’t found it as difficult, or as embarrassing as he thought it would be to tell Darren he wore one. Would it be so terrible if Karl knew? That was the thing, did he already know because of his sister (that experience, the more he thought about it, was something else that loomed large in his mind) and would he mind. Would his German friend spread it around and tell all the other holidaying kids? Would he be the centre of the wrong kind of attention?

All this was running around his head when mum came onto the balcony and said, if he wanted to, he could decide where they ate that night.

~

That night, as far as Robbie was concerned, they had the best meal of the holiday so far - a KFC Family Bucket. Oddly, it didn’t taste quite the same as the ones he occasionally was allowed back home, but it was still pretty delicious and seemed to satisfy all members of the Davison’s appetite. Later they went down to the beach where another Volleyball competition was underway with a DJ playing a fantastic mix that made the place very lively. Other games with kids and adults alike, playing footie, or throwing frisbees, or some bat and ball games... the place was busy and fun. Robbie once again managed to get himself involved in a game of football so left his mum and dad drinking in a nearby chiringuito that overlooked the action.

The night passed relatively quickly but as dad had hired a car for the second time, they intended on driving to the Spanish border and then follow the river that separated the two countries inland to see what they could find. They might take the river ferry across to Spain just so they could say they’d done it but really it was to investigate some of the little villages that were always a nice surprise when visited.

Just after 11pm they returned to the hotel, settled a footie-exhausted Robbie in a fresh nappy and had a relatively early night. They wanted to be clear-headed for the drive along the coast the following day.

~

For the next two days Thomas kept the hire car and they drove around the country from the Spanish border to the Silver coast. They stopped at some of the most iconic Portuguese beauty spots, where Claire took loads of photos and didn’t check her ‘social account’ once. The family toured around enjoying the countryside, the shoreline and the time spent with each other was obvious. Even the couple of times Robbie had an al fresco nappy change, he didn’t seem overly concerned.

In fact, Robbie proved to be enthusiastic about all the sights, the food, the people; his buoyant personality winning friends where ever they stopped. Throughout the entire journey there wasn’t one time that he was questioned about wearing a nappy. Even if his parents noticed one or two interested looks from bystanders, it always seemed to be accompanied by a smile or nod that seemed friendly or supportive. Claire began to wonder if more people than she knew kept their teenage kids in nappies and maybe like her thought it a good thing. It could be that was just her own wishful thinking.

By the time they got home, well, back to the hotel, they were quite fatigued and didn’t want to venture too far from their room. The evening meal was taken in the hotel’s rather formal restaurant. It had two eating areas, one serving a buffet style meal for those who had paid the ‘all-in’ price and a more select and more expensive one for those who chose a more a la carte approach to their meals.

The buffet was always of quite a good standard but they’d heard exceptional things about the other eatery and decided to give it a try; they weren’t disappointed. After they’d finished a rather fine meal with a couple bottles of wine, mum and dad made their way back upstairs, whilst Robbie wanted to spend some time playing games in the hotel’s entertainment arcade. None of them fancied the showroom where an evening of Fado was promised but as it was not too late Robbie, with a pocket full of Euros, was let loose to enjoy himself.

The first person he saw was Karl and, as they hadn’t spent any time together since the Darren incident, he wasn’t sure if his German friend would make fun of him now he knew his secret. However, it was gratifying to see his face light up when he noticed Robbie standing under the arcade arch and beckoned him over to watch as he played one of the machines.

Although Karl gave no indication he was going to say anything other than general chat about the game, it was nibbling away at Robbie’s confidence that he might know or say something at any moment. So, when the game was over he decided he’d try and have a private word with him to find out what the young ‘blabbermouth’ had actually revealed.

He manoeuvred them both over to the ‘Cola/Slushie Bar’, where a flash of their respective wristbands gave them access to free drinks, before engaging him in any deep investigation into what had been said.

The chat ranged from how much they were both enjoying themselves, how soon they’d be returning home and how wonderful the weather had been. Robbie briefly touched on Karl’s family and asked how his brother and sister were and just got a general nod that everyone was fine. He saw this as an opportunity to apologise for leaving Karl to cope with Darren by the pool.

“Nein...” he spoke a few words in German, “sorry, erm, he was very nice and polite,” which Robbie took as meaning that a lot of British tourists weren’t. “He was good fun.”

“I saw you in deep conversation... whispering to each other and then looking over at me and laughing.”

“Did I?” Karl shrugged.

“Yes you did, what were you talking about?” Strangely Robbie’s question was more of an accusation but Karl didn’t seem to notice.

“Ah yes, I remember,” he recalled the moment. “Darren was embarrassed to tell me something... a witz..”

“Something about me?” Robbie dived in aggressively.

“Verzeihen Sie!”

“Was he telling you about my, erm, situation?” He just couldn’t bring himself to mention the words even though he’d been desperate to confront Karl and find out what he knew.

Karl just shook his head, “What situation, what are you talking about?”

“Erm, my wearing, erm, you know...?”

“It was a witz... he was telling me something embarrassing and didn’t want anyone else to hear it.”

“What was it he said?” Robbie was almost demanding an answer.

“Oh, let me see, ah yes. It was a witz, erm... a joke... he was scared it was rude so just whispered it to me. What did the elephant say to the naked man?” Karl waited to see if Robbie responded but didn’t know what to make of this turn of events. Karl saw his English buddy looking vague so provided the punchline. “How do you breathe through that thing?” He chortled at the silly joke and was surprised that there wasn’t a better reaction from Robbie. “I’m not sure he knew what the joke meant, or that you do...” He laughed again, “but I thought it very funny. Darren was so embarrassed about telling it.”

He still saw Robbie shrug as if it was the least funny or interesting thing he’d ever heard but Karl explained it. “Naked man with his.. you know... penis out... elephant with its trunk... get it now?”

Robbie began to laugh but not from the gag but from relief that was all that was revealed. No nappy info out there so he was safe, for now.

However, just as he was calming down from this innocent revelation Karl asked, “So, what is your situation?

~ tbc ~

Part 12

“Oh, erm, nothing... it’s just, errrrmmmm,” Robbie was stalling for time. “I think...” then he had a brainwave, “I think mum got me the wrong wristband,” he waggled it in front of Karl’s eyes, “see, green and white which I’m sure is wrong as it should be like yours... more multi coloured.”

“Hmmm,” Karl looked at his and Robbie’s wristbands he knew the green and white one is for under twelves. He looked up at Robbie and shrugged as if he thought it was probably correct but Robbie just wanted to appear older than he was and although Robbie had said he was nearly thirteen thought that might not be true, after all, an eight year old was his best friend. Karl didn’t judge, he liked the English boy “Well, it won’t stop you getting anything I can get but you can go some places I can’t so... I wouldn’t worry about it.”

Robbie was just relieved that he didn’t have to confess anything about his nappy although for some reason it suddenly did feel larger than it had under his shorts. He then realised he’d just released a stream into it without being aware. Was the anxiety of waiting for an answer about any ‘Darren revelation’ just too much? The developing warming glow was distracting him from what his friend was saying. Thankfully he remembered just how well his mum wrapped him up and that the new rubber pants with the robust elasticated leg cuffs would hold whatever was released.

“Sorry, what did you say?” He looked at Karl, his eyes eager for fun.

“I just said that the console over there is free do you want a game?” He was a little distracted himself as a few of his other friends were beckoning him over to another screen that, judging from the excited noises coming from the little crowd gathered around the player, was reaching some kind of climax.

“Sounds like fun,” Robbie was pleased to have something to take his mind off of his snug expanding disposable.

Over the weeks since he’d been put back in nappies, and completely unconsciously, wearing wet padding had become less and less of a problem and, although he probably wouldn’t want to admit it, didn’t find the sensation totally unpleasant anymore. So, as he walked around, or unintentionally rubbed himself up against various apparatus as he watched others or played himself, his expanded nappy was producing some very nice sensations. Another burst of pee only adding to the comfort and excitement he was enjoying. There was far more gratification going on under the folds of material than he was letting on.

~

He’d loved the company of all the other kids - playing games, watching totals tot up as some whizz had found the way to beat the tech or simply the raucous satisfaction of a load of noisy kids together. It was just after eleven when he looked at the clock and realised, for the first time in ages, he’d been without mum or dad’s supervision for longer than ever. Now he hadn’t been given a curfew or an expected time to return but, even though there were some younger than him still playing the various amusements, thought it time for him to return to the top floor.

With a wave of ‘good night’ he made his way to the hotel elevators. As he waited for one to descend he was joined at the door by Anna which made him feel nervous. He nodded and she gave him that perfect smile back. Even at this time of night she looked stunning.

“How are you... Robbie?” She pulled his name from her list of the many kids who were at the hotel.

“Erm, fine, erm, Anna thanks, erm, danke.” He tried to smile back but of course the memory of their last encounter came flooding back – that and the fact that he was once again wearing a very soaked nappy made him blush and feel very self-conscious. Despite wanting to appear grown up around her he felt like a little kid, even more so because she knew his secret.

“Gute, gute,” she responded and quite naturally appraised him whilst noticing his expanded shorts. “Have you had a gute zeit?” There was just that accent, mixed German and English, which just made her sound even more exotic and desirable but at that moment he just hoped she wasn’t going to suggest a fresh nappy change.

“Just been in the arcade with your brother.” He tried his best at small talk.

“Ah, he’s there is he? OK Robbie I need to go and fetch him. Gute Nacht.” And she disappeared back toward the arcade intent on finding Karl as the elevator doors opened and with relief found he had the lift to himself.

~

Once back in the room his mother had already retired for the night but dad was still up and had all Robbie’s night time requirements set out next to his bed.

“Sorry dad, I met up with some mates and didn’t realise how late it was getting.”

“Don’t worry lad, you’re not in any trouble but I’m glad you’re back before midnight otherwise we’d have started worrying.” He said placating any anxiety his son was experiencing.

Robbie was relieved he wasn’t in trouble and also that his parents had trusted him enough to let him out on his own and there’d been no time restriction on his return. This was a new development, they trusted him to know when it was time. He felt quite proud of himself, despite the heavy nappy under his shorts.

Dad automatically patted Robbie’s bottom and knew that it was time to get him ready for bed so asked if he needed any help stripping down.

“No but I could do with a pee,” Robbie half joked.

“Well, you’ve still got your nappy on so... let loose and I’ll change you when you’ve finished.”

Although Robbie had been joking he suddenly knew, with all the drinks he’d had at the arcade, he could actually pee a little more so simply forced what was left out.

Meanwhile, dad went out onto the balcony and cleared the table and brought in the empty bottles of water he and Claire had been drinking that night.

“You done?” Dad regarded his son who was standing with legs apart and a look of success on his face. Dad smiled to himself, it had been amazing to see how accepting of his nappied status Robbie had become and how it didn’t bother him at all filling his padding in such a way.

Thomas watched as Robbie kicked off his trainers, slipped effortlessly from his t-shirt and then shuffled down his camo shorts leaving him standing in just his rather expanded plastic pants and the tell-tale bulge of a rather wet disposable underneath.

“Looks full son... hope you haven’t wandered around with it that soaked for too long,” but he wasn’t having a go just being fatherly and concerned for his son’s welfare.

“Mum usually supervises this bit,” Robbie reminded his dad, “so as not to get any dampness on the floor or furniture.”

“Quite right too,” dad responded and was quickly there to ease his plastic pants down and pull on the tapes, whilst a hand between his son’s crotch held the weight of the sodden nappy.

Once that was completed, and the nappy set aside where it could do no harm, Thomas set about wiping his son down with a warm damp cloth before the nightly regime of lotion and powder. Once again Thomas was pleased with the comfortable stance his son held whilst all this was going on. He chatted about the latest games they had down in the arcade but there was no reaction against what dad was doing. No shame, no wriggling, not even an acknowledgement that this was anything but normal, as dad slipped him into a rather thick (with extra padding) disposable and pulled up a clean pair of sweet cartoon plastic pants. Patting him down Thomas said he was ready to go but, if he wasn’t tired, they could sit on the balcony for a little while and chat. Robbie smiled and said, “Yes, I’d like that.”

~

The breeze had died down and it was back to being a warm and sultry night. Dad was sitting in a t-shirt and boxers, his son in t-shirt and bulging protection, both seemed at ease with the situation. Even though they talked, it wasn’t about anything in particular and all the time, basking in his dad’s love and concern, Robbie began to think about how they’d got to this stage.

When he changed schools a year ago and went up a level, mum and dad had given as much freedom as they could to an eleven year old. They trusted him to be good and responsible like he had been all his life but then – the gang. He was no longer interested in hugs and praise from parents all he wanted was to be accepted by this group of kids who were way out of his natural comfort zone. He tried to fit in; he did some really bad stuff even though it didn’t sit easily with him. They were doing things any parent would never understand but that pre-teens needed to do to prove themselves.

Over the past few weeks it had come as a bit of a shock that being treated the way he now was meant he was cherished. Not that he wasn’t loved before, it was just he’d rejected that innate parental care and had decided, as age demanded, his new independent mates were the way to go.

When he thought back over the last year, the madness, the stunts, the stealing, the rudeness and the incident that changed school life, he couldn’t have imagined that giving someone a sandwich would lead to such a colossal transformation of himself.

To begin with he was overawed to be part of the school bully’s group. It was so out of character but it nudged a need in him to step away from the Mr Niceguy image he had and find what else was on offer to a growing lad his age. The weird grudging respect being part of a gang generated and then the need to prove himself by going further than anyone else, that was the big one. It had been a mad year. Unfortunately, the sleepless nights, the last minute dashes to the toilet and the occasional (but never admitted to) nocturnal accidents, meant the desire to keep everyone at arm’s length less they discover the truth of what he’d done. It was all a heavy, heavy burden.

Conversely, that morning not so long ago, when dad had been firm and told him that he was being returned to wearing a nappy, had jolted him from all that. To be truthful, he hadn’t known what to make of it and at first thought it must be a joke. It was preposterous, stupid, insane and would never happen... but it had. His twelve year old macho posturing didn’t work because his dad, the man he’d known all his life, the loving father who had taught him so much, had decided that enough was enough. He knew physically that dad was no push over, and although he’d let Robbie go his own way, there was still, in his twelve year old mind, the knowledge that dad was the disciplinarian if he so chose.

So, in the beginning it looked like dad had led the proceedings, which was probably the idea, a more imposing and difficult person to rebel against. However, it had soon become clear that it was mum who was driving the ‘reclamation’ of their wayward son. What his parents were doing without Robbie realising it was what he needed and, although knew he should react and fight for his independence, somehow, somewhere, deep down, he recognised they were trying their best to save him from himself.

Because of those past (and some relatively recent) ‘misdemeanours’ Robbie thought he didn’t deserve his family’s affection. The image in his head of actual physical punishment, the THWACK! took control. It was something he was terrified of but probably thought he deserved so that led to him being scared into compliance. Even though he knew he’d done something far worse, that brutal physical element was just too much to consider. Although, if it came to it a quick smack was probably something he could handle, the thought of regular and unrestricted beatings that he was sure what he’d done would warrant, wasn’t. Even though the gang members had all inferred that domestic beatings and physical punishment was part of their day-to-day lives, for Robbie that thought really unnerved him.

Contrariwise, with this change in parental supervision and how quickly he’d found himself well-padded and valued, he’d begun to appreciate and desire the return of that loving emotion. The last few weeks had made him realise that there was perhaps some method in their madness and they were simply relieving him of any and all responsibility.

At first he rejected the very idea but despite the mumblings, the tantrums, the harsh words, in the deep recesses of his mind, he knew he deserved what was happening. He knew he’d have to pay for what he’d done, even if his parents didn’t know just what it was that he had done.

They’d gone a strange way about doing it, of making a point, but now he didn’t have to prove anything. Even how he dressed (and what he was dressed in) was decided for him so didn’t have to think about something as basic as that. They’d taken away that necessity all growing kids desire most, to be an individual and self-absorbed teenager (but look where that had got him) and given him the chance to start again. The nappy, although quite a peculiar idea, was, as it turned out, making some kind of sense.

~

Although he was rapidly approaching his teens there had been quite a change in how Robbie perceived himself. For instance, he’d never really noticed girls before – the receptionist and Anna had both turned his head and provoked a basic physical reaction. Then there was Karl (and if he was honest, quite a few other semi-clad lads that visited the pool and beach) who also seemed to produce something similar. Perhaps because of his past interest in playing football and then falling in with the gang his mind had never wandered into such areas before. However, being in a gang had made him desperate to be thought of as grown up so these current observations and interests of the people around him seemed to prove he was certainly on the way. But then, and though he was loathed to admit it, the release of responsibilities and building sandcastles with Darren and his friends had been more fun than he thought possible. The liberation of having to be one thing or another had been completely obliterated by this holiday. Even when he played footie or joined in with any of the games, those simple pleasures were really just as much fun. It was like experiencing and appreciating things he’d dismissed as too childish... and it was amazing.

It had all lifted him out of a worrying and depressive mind set.

But why?

He seemed caught between both sides of his development without one winning over the other. Possibly that’s why mum dressed him younger than he was? Maybe this was a good thing? Maybe mum and dad had wanted it this way. Maybe because there’d been a dramatic realisation in what Robbie understood his place to be and what was expected of him, he could be himself.  Mum had said or alluded to this simple fact on a number of occasions - there was no rush to grow up. Oh, and what was expected of him was, as it turned out, nothing. All he had to be was a loving and thoughtful son.

He could hear his dad still talking, he could hear the muted babble of people down by the pool, but his mind was elsewhere.

“...and what do you think?” Thomas leant over to get his son’s opinion.

“Hmmmm,” Robbie nodded hoping to delay his reply and make dad assume he was thinking about it, when in fact he had no idea what the question was. “Erm, dad I’m tired so I think I’ll sleep on that,” he got up to leave, “night-night” gave him a kiss on the cheek and left dad wondering.

He crinkled his way to bed, his thick padding a reminder of his place in the family, and slipped under the thin sheet, his mind alive on so many subjects he thought he’d never get to sleep again. Nonetheless, within two minutes he was dead to the world.

~

Robbie’s arms were held by his side but away from his body. He tried to free himself but was held tightly down. He was wearing a t-shirt and his baggy red shorts but his legs were spread apart and also restrained so they couldn’t move. There was something in his mouth, a gag of some kind that only allowed a muffled scream that, although panicky, really wasn’t attracting anyone’s sympathy.

A figure approached with scissors; it was Anna. As she got closer so it became obvious that Robbie was in what looked like a public operating theatre because he could see other people - kids from the beach, the pool and any number of others old and young from the hotel - begin to crowd around. Panic and a dry throat made him believe that this was not a good position to be in but no matter how much he struggled there was no help and no escape.

“Now you will see,” Anna looked around at the assembled crowd, “as I remove Little Robbie’s clothing,” She was speaking in English, although it might have been German but he could understand what was being said. “All will be revealed.”

She began to cut away his clothes. Once his t-shirt and shorts had been removed she looked up at her audience, “As you all can see, Little Robbie is already prepared for this operation. He wears the nappy and plastic pants that are needed to contain what is within.”

A smattering of coughs, whoops and giggles echoed around the operating theatre.

She ran her hand over the shiny plastic cover, pressing down the padding underneath, which was like the thick cotton nappies mum dressed him in right at the beginning. Anna gently caressed the material, rubbing the two different fabrics, cotton and plastic, together in a soothing and relaxing way. The dread seemed to ease from Robbie and he began to settle down. However, the audience began to crowd around and could see his parents off to the side holding each other’s hand smiling and looking encouraging.

“It won’t be long sweetheart.” He could read his mother’s lips as Anna’s palms slipped up from his groin and began to gently, and at first almost imperceptibly, rotate on his soft boyish tummy. She started at his belly button and rotated out, her palms covered in oil or some lotion. He felt her begin to increase pressure as the rotations got longer but heavier, soon his stomach began to cramp. Anna noticed the change in Robbie’s breathing; the strain as he tried to release himself from his bindings coupled with a new terror that was growing in his belly.

“No,” he screamed into the gag, he wasn’t going to allow this to happen in front of such an audience.

“Let it go Robbie,” Anna whispered, “Let all your guilt and worry go.”

The pressure was building and he knew, that soon, and with or without this crowd of people watching his bowel was about to release its load.

“Don’t hold back Little Robbie,” her voice was soothing but heartfelt. Her superb young boobs jutted through her tight pink jumper, “get rid of it once and for all... you no longer need it... your nappy will be your security...”

She kept up this nonstop flow of reassurance. The crowd in some areas offering their own praise and encouragement. The cacophony of sound reached a peak as Anna pressed down firmly and Robbie could only let out a muffled scream through the gag as he filled his nappy with a bulky (and endless) supply of crap.

“You have been released from guilt... you are reborn... you are a new child to the world.” Anna seemed to be some kind of witch or enchantress, no longer a surgeon or masseur. “Well done Little Robbie, you’ve done what needed to be done.”

Her smile so reassuring, her words pleasant on the ear, her figure as she stepped back was awesome. A cheer went up but Robbie was still struggling, his tear filled eyes were streaming because of what had just taken place, the strangled scream, the mess he’d made, the pain and embarrassment... the...”

“Robbie sweetheart, Robbie, wake up love...” a voice was whispering from above.

He opened his eyes to see in the half-light both parents looking down on him. Somehow he was caught up in the bedding and struggling to detach himself. However, the smell told him that the dream had been more than that.

“You’ve been calling out love,” mum tried to soothe her son by gently wiping sweat from his forehead, “and you urgently need a change.”

His heart was still beating fast as he slowly came around and just a reassuring hug from mum and an encouraging smile from dad seemed more than enough for him to know where he was. However, a stunned, Robbie was still coming to terms with what had happened and although relieved it was all a dream, knew that his nappy would be in a terrible state. He hoped that all had been contained because he could feel the warm mushy mass and shuddered at what had just taken place. The smell was bad and as dad helped him up he could feel the contents slip down and sag heavily in his bloated disposable. Mum had thrown open the balcony doors and a small breeze rippled in to help defuse the pong. What an awful bizarre dream; so vivid, so precise, so effective... and so, so messy.

“Looks like your nappy has had quite a bit to do,” dad observed as he ran his hand over the bloated plastic and gently patted the heavy droop, “but it seems that these tough new pants have done their job”.

As mum slowly guided him to the bathroom she nodded to her husband, “Can you get stuff ready for when we’ve finished,” but he’d already started to rearrange the messed up bed and gather things together.

Once in the bathroom the real outcome of his dream was released, much of which could be flushed down the toilet but it wasn’t easy. Meanwhile, a shitty bum was being hosed down with the shower and mum could tell it had hit him very hard because of his timidity and the way he kept his eyes downcast throughout the clean-up. Whatever he’d been dreaming about appeared to have had some kind of mental as well as physical impact, she hoped her sweet boy could recover quickly from whatever it was.

The nightmare had worried him. Not only because since that afternoon at the disco when Anna changed him, he hadn’t said anything, or had anything to do with her, apart from the occasional nod as they passed one and other, so why was she involved? He’d never felt so childish, and, because of his messed up nappy, thought he’d never needed one more. He was just a...

“Don’t worry about it sweetheart,” mum interrupted his thoughts, “we have this covered... we always have this covered.” She was once again soothing his troubled mind, letting him know that all was well, anticipated and manageable.

He was carefully cleaned up and wrapped in an even thicker disposable, one of the more childish but more absorbent ones like Anna had changed him into at the disco. With extra padding and a return to his thick clear rubber pants he was soon ready to see the night through in total security.

What did mum mean, “we have this covered... we always have this covered”? And why, after that previous dream that seemed so positive, where everybody was so supportive had this one led to such a messy disaster?

But her words were hardly registering because, although he was shocked, he recognised the fact that his dream might have contained a message – was he now released from his over-riding guilt or was it a pointer to something else... was he being told to confess all and he’d be relieved of his liability... and why had Anna called him Little Robbie?

~

Of course it wasn’t Anna calling him Little Robbie it was whatever cerebral components go into making a dream. He wondered if in fact he was calling himself ‘Little’ and it had nothing to do with Anna. Over the past few days, especially as he settled into the wonderful and relaxed routine of being on holiday, he’d begun to wonder if being allowed to let himself go and have no distractions, if he really wanted this much easier and less complicated way of being himself. Had being made to wear a nappy simply released him from being too self-conscious. There was no doubt that to begin with being seen wearing one had made him worry about what others might think but now...well...?

Once his parents had returned to their room Robbie got up and ventured out onto the balcony. At that time of night the pool was lit but only in certain areas and looked placid and inviting now there was hardly a murmur from anywhere. Apart that is from the low level hum of machinery and generators somewhere within the body of the hotel providing power.

He rubbed his hands over the soft pliable surface of his bulging nappy and wondered if he was the only twelve year old in the hotel still required to wear such an outfit. As he sat, trying to see the stars or the lights on distant fishing boats out at sea, he desperately wanted to find a meaning for his dream. He’d never had one that was so detailed or one that he remembered so precisely. Was there a message or was that just him looking for a way to accept his current circumstances? His hands wandered more intently feeling the shape and every curve of his protection, and, after the recent shitty disaster, was grateful to wear it. Maybe that’s what it was about... maybe it wasn’t so much a message as a thing to be thankful for. Just imagine what his bed would have been like had he not been wearing a nappy.

He'd reluctantly accepted his parents decision to put him in padding but now wondered if he thought he should wear it. Would guilt build over time and mean that remorse was so overwhelming that future stresses would undoubtedly mean he’d need a nappy more and more?

He closed his eyes and drifted off.

His mum found him fast asleep on the balcony as the sun was coming up, hand firmly down the front of his wet nappy. She smiled knowingly, grabbed a blanket and wrapped it around their shoulders, so together they drowsily watched the start of a new day in silence. A few distant high clouds reflected the morning’s fresh vibrant colours - it was awesome.

~ tbc ~

 

Part 13

Over the buffet breakfast they were joined by the Carpenters and it was agreed, because it was such a calm looking sea, that a dolphin sightseeing trip together might be fun. Darren in particular was excited about seeing a ‘live’ dolphin and his infectious enthusiasm rubbed off on Robbie, who had to admit to having never seen one ‘live’.  

As part of the four hour boat trip lunch was included and a half-hour anchor in a sandy bay for anyone who wanted to go for a swim, the boys especially were dressed for such an event. Once again, Robbie had the disposable underneath his robust neoprene shorts but it hardly showed (whilst dry at least), together with a very loose-fitting dark blue t-shirt. Darren had traded his tiny Speedos for a pair of yellow swim shorts and yellow top. The mum’s didn’t look like they planned on doing any swimming as both wore dress shorts. Meanwhile, the dads appeared coincidentally wearing red shorts and red polo shirts, it looked like they were staff rather than holidaymakers.

They boarded the boat with about thirty other passengers and, after a basic rundown of the safety features, the boat cheerfully motored out to sea. There was general hubbub, music was played and when necessary or to point out a feature, the speakers gave way to the ‘captain’ who gave a short commentary in English, Spanish, Portuguese, German and French.

There was an overwhelming smell of the sea and suntan lotion mingled with light fumes from the boat’s engine. However, the view looking back towards land was quite spectacular with its cliffs and ragged outcrops. Most of the kids onboard were searching the horizon for any hint of the much desired ‘fish’ but to begin with no such sleek creature appeared.

The captain was letting the crowd know that a family of Bottlenosed dolphins were often seen where they were heading and only the day before had caught sight of a Minky whale. The excitement of such a possible discovery had everyone scanning the area to see if they could be the first to identify such a prospect. Unfortunately this lead to several ‘false alarms’ as people mistook waves for dolphins. Robbie ventured that people were doing it on porpoise, which got a laugh from his parents but Darren had no idea what he was talking about. When it was explained by his mum he roared with laughter and looked even more than usually impressed by his ‘best friend’.

~

Although the sea was relatively calm, there was a bit of a swell that not everyone appreciated and one or two were finding the side of the boat a comfort as they threw up. Unfortunately, Darren was one of those and as both sets of parents were ‘up top’ on the second deck having a drink, it was Robbie who looked after him as he bent over the side and ‘fed the fishes’. Alas, as he was bent over holding his little friend Robbie’s t-shirt rode up and the waistband of his disposable was available for anyone who wanted to, to notice.

A couple of snickering English teenaged lads found this hysterical and were noisily pointing it out to the rest of the boat. Most adults weren’t bothered but it did garner a couple of laughs from other kids who also thought it strange and weird.

At first Robbie didn’t know it was him that was causing the laughter as Darren barfed some more of his breakfast over the side. But when he heard the words “nappy wearing little baby” he guessed it was him and when he saw everyone looking his way he sighed.

Ever since he’d been returned to wearing a nappy he’d dreaded this moment, this moment of confrontation. However, mum and dad had more or less convinced him to own the fact he was wearing a nappy and not be phased by anyone who thought it amusing or strange.

The jibes continued and Thomas noticed from where he stood that some kids had gathered around Darren and his son and thought it was because of the seasickness but decided to investigate anyway.

Darren didn’t appear too good but at least it looked like he’d stopped throwing up and Robbie was left holding his mate in support. Then Thomas heard the word “... you big baby” and knew who they were aimed at. He was getting ready to step in but Robbie beat him too it.

Robbie had heard the nasty taunts and knew what was coming but for the moment at least Darren was his main concern. However, the fact that he’d been wearing a nappy for some time now and had got used to it, he’d also got an idea of how he’d react should he get challenged because of his padding. Circumstances and attitude were the key... what would be most effective given the situation? and then Mally sprung to mind.

“Lads, lads,” it was like he was back in the gang, where more than once they’d had run-ins with other gangs and never backed down. He remembered how Mally had dealt with an older group of lads who were having a go so decided to try it for himself. “You need to shut your stupid faces. I’m the one wearing a nappy but it’s you lot who are acting like dumb babies.” The amused smile disappeared from their faces and the mood changed. In fact, more adults seemed to be taking an interest and Thomas stood ready to intervene but was interested to see where this led.

Robbie’s act of defiance continued. “You have no idea why I wear a nappy - illness, childhood physical problem, fun or maybe I’m being punished for being a stupid unthinking twat like you lot.”

Thomas had never really seen this side of his son before and yet he was still hugging and consoling Darren as he verbally chastised these would-be bullies.

“So maybe, your mums and dads might like to think about putting you back in nappies because you’re acting like spoiled... little... kids. So, grow up and leave me alone.” At that Darren quickly turned and barfed even more over the side but Robbie just turned to comfort him.

Actually, what had happened in the Mally incident was that whilst he walked closer to the leader of the opposing gang just chatting and being amenable and almost acquiescent to him, he suddenly let loose a hefty kick in the lad’s balls. Whilst he was rolling around on the floor he challenged any of his mates if they’d like to join him. The older boys were not that tough after all as they slowly moved away. Mumbling insults and retribution, but moving, nonetheless.

Robbie’s words, rather than a swift kick, seemed to have the desired effect. The other boys stood around looking stunned and a few comments from some adults that had understood the confrontation were murmuring their agreement with Robbie’s assessment. They may have blushed because they exited and found somewhere else to be on the boat.

Thomas found his way over to Robbie and asked if he needed any help with Darren but he just held his mate and said that he didn’t think there could be much more left.

“You handled that very well son, I’m proud of you.” Dad smiled and pulled his son’s t-shirt back down to hide the revealing waistband.

Suddenly Amanda appeared by their side. “Oh sweetheart,” she hurried to her ailing son’s side, “are you OK?” He nodded but was actually looking at Robbie. “You’re a good friend Robbie,” she smiled her thanks. “You go and get yourself something to drink and I’ll take over here.”

“If you’re sure, are you gonna be OK now?” He checked with Darren who was looking pale but nodded he was as good as he was going to be.

A few moments later there was a yell of “Dolphins” and everyone perked up as they saw a pod of three Bottlenosed dolphins break the surface about ten yards away. Even a sad looking Darren seemed to shrug off his sickness to whoop as one leapt out of the water close by. Their appearance had got the entire boat excited - cameras clicked and people cheered as a few more sleek bodies joined in the show.

~

Once back on dry land the Carpenters headed back to the hotel so Darren could rest after his seasickness, whilst the Davisons made their way into town as Claire wanted to do a bit of shopping. Both Robbie and Thomas sighed at the prospect, neither being particularly avid shoppers. So, Claire took the hint and told them she’d meet them back at the hotel later and they could go off and do whatever they wanted to. Robbie wanted to go on the jet-ski again but dad said they’d had enough of the sea for the day and suggested they grab a couple of ice creams and make their way back poolside at the hotel.

In truth, Robbie could do with a nappy change, so thought this was the best idea and then perhaps, once changed, he could go and meet up with his mates and spend some time with them.

Once back in their hotel room Robbie shucked off of his damp swimmers and bloated padding as Thomas got things ready for his change.

“You know son,” Thomas began to clean his son with a warm damp cloth, “I was proud of the way you reacted to those lads on the boat.” Robbie squirmed under such praise.

“Hmm, yes, erm, sorry dad. I know I didn’t quite admit to why I was wearing a nappy like you and mum said I should... but I did allude to it as a possibility so I hope you’re not angry with me?” He wondered if his explanation would work.

“It was handled with a touch of maturity I haven’t seen from you before,” dad replied with a serious tone to his voice. “Maybe these nappies are having more of a positive effect on you than we expected,” he chuckled whilst fluffing out a new disposable. “Yes, I’m very proud of you... very.”

Robbie wasn’t sure if his dad was addressing him or the disposable but he did have an opinion and wanted to share it. “Dad,” he wriggled as his father fed the soft padding under his bum, “I never thought I’d get used to having to wear such... a thing...” his conversation was interrupted by giggles and coughs as his father sprayed too much baby powder over his boy’s bare genitals. Once the small cloud had dispersed he carried on. “Erm, but now, well, I don’t mind because you’ve not allowed me an alternative. My briefs and boxers aren’t available and I’m only given these,” he reached down and patted the crinkly plastic coated disposable, “so it could be a lot worse.” Dad fastened the tapes together and reached for a pair of clear plastic pants which he wiggled up his son’s legs and smoothed them into place.

“So, you have no complaints about all this now?” dad questioned his sincerity. He wasn’t sure himself as the childish print on the disposable was obvious under the slinky sheen of his plastic pants. His almost thirteen year old son, did look cute and, although perhaps it should have been an anathema for a father to think that way, it was what had brought his son to his senses... so far.

“Well, yerrr, I’m almost thirteen and wear a nappy but,” he saw his dad raise an eyebrow, “I know you’re doing this for a reason that makes sense to you and mum.” Dad kept a neutral face, “and I know I’ve quite a lot to make up for so... I don’t complain. I just get on with what you’ve decided and, as I feel quite comfy wearing them... weirdly, now, ummm, I, erm, quite, hmmm, like them.” His voice trailed off with this admission.

“Good,” his father patted his son’s padding once more, “because they suit you very well and we think that you have become a much nicer, a more thoughtful person as a result of wearing them.” It seemed a relevant thing to say but dad was being his usual genial self and invited him in for a hug. Robbie snuggled up to his dad but as he was held Thomas added, “I’m just so glad we choose this route and not... well...” he paused and exhaled with relief, “let’s be happy with this.” Robbie’s slinky little padded bottom was stoked and rubbed several times in verification.

However, though it was such a caring moment, the idea of the THWACK! briefly entered Robbie’s head and his body quivered at the thought. A consideration that hadn’t entered his head for some time and one he hoped would leave very quickly. After all, he was also glad that they hadn’t chosen that as an alternative.

“Thanks dad,” and hugged his father tightly.

~

After a short while dad said he was planning on just relaxing on the balcony and if Robbie wanted to go off, as long as he didn’t leave the hotel grounds, he was happy for him do so.

Robbie pulled up his new camo style shorts and slipped over the matching top, which had become his favourites to wear.

“Can I go in the arcade?”

“Sure, how much do you need?” Dad groped in his pocket and pulled out a €20 note. “Will this be enough?”

“Thanks dad, you’re the best,” and darted for the door heading for the elevator. His mood a lot livelier now he had something else to think about.

Once he got to the reception area it was busy with a new load of holidaymakers lining up to check in. He felt like an elder stateman since he’d been there over a week and his tan was coming on nicely. He looked at a noisy bunch of kids who appeared remarkably pale and realised that it wasn’t that long ago that’s just what he looked like. Still it was good to see so many other lads and lasses around his age and hoped there’d be a whole set of new friends to make over the next few days.

Once at the arcade he changed the note into coins and looked to see if Karl or any of the others might be around but, on this occasion, it seemed relatively quiet. What was busy though was the nearby jungle gym and soft play area for those under six, which was a hive of noise and activity. Of course, once he peaked in he saw that Anna was there with Leo and a whole bunch of other screaming toddlers. She seemed in her element as her and a couple of other teenagers supervised what was going on. Robbie stood for a moment admiring Anna but felt his nappy stirring once again and didn’t want to be caught staring at her so moved off and down to the pool.

Karl wasn’t there but a few of their other friends had congregated around a lad’s mobile and were watching a Premier League game on the small screen. Later they heard that a TV near the bar had been tuned into the game so they all trooped in there to watch.

The place was busy and although some of the older viewers had beer, the group Robbie was with were enjoying going mad with all the free Colas they could access. As the game continued a weird moment came for Robbie because a few of the lads were rushing off to the nearby toilet but he quite happily stayed where he was and gently let loose a warm stream into his disposable. Of course it was something he’d done before but never (as far as he could remember) with such relish because his viewing wasn’t interrupted; when he felt the need, he’d just gone. Even as his nappy expanded and pushed out the front of his shorts he sat there feeling quite smug whilst still enjoying the game.

As the game progressed further the area also became a noisy centre of excitement as fans and critics joined in with their opinions, even if the teams playing were not their own. Robbie thought it strange (but fun) seeing and hearing some of the comments shouted at the ref’s (and VARs) decision-making in a foreign language but understood from the group of kid’s exasperation just exactly what was meant.

~

After the game, and as most people had dispersed either back to their room or to refresh themselves in the pool, Robbie took up residency on a sun lounger to watch all that was going on poolside. He was joined by a couple of other boys who had also decided not to launch themselves into the cooling water but were still excited enough by the game to want to chat about it further.  

One boy sat on the end of the lounger which made Robbie’s pull up his feet so that his knees were bent. The loose material around the leg of his shorts drooped open and the lad, Owen from Swansea, took great delight in saying that he could see Robbie’s bulging plastic pants. The other boy also grabbed the opportunity of taking a peek up Robbie’s short’s leg nodding in agreement.

“So, you wear a nappy,” the lads were grinning from ear to ear but were also somewhat perturbed by the fact that the object of their burgeoning ridicule wasn’t all flustered and trying to hide his shame. “Bit of a baby are you, colourful nappy for pissing yourself...” Owen was pleased with what he’d discovered and hoped to make the most of it.

“Mmmm maybe,” Robbie smoothed out the front of his bulging shorts and patted the mound. “My parents make me wear a nappy because of something stupid I’ve done and think this will make me remember I’m still only a kid and not a grown-up who can do what he likes.”

That wasn’t the response Owen and his mate Steve had expected, nor the further little addition a surprisingly relaxed Robbie offered as a little sting.

“Apparently various parents have noticed and taken what’s happening to me as a possible way of dealing with their own unruly kids... so... before long I may not be the only one. In fact, I think there are already a number in the same boat.” He looked them both in the eye, “Not sure who might be next.”

Owen and his mate looked stunned. This was not what they expected to happen and, as a couple of dumb fourteen year olds, wondered if word had reached their parents yet. The idea of pouring ridicule on Robbie evaporated as they slunk off looking more than a little agitated; the superiority that a teenager has over anyone younger suddenly disappearing when they themselves felt threatened.

There was no doubt that the thicker and more childish disposable was much more comfy to wear than the ones his mum had put him in originally. Not that they weren’t comfy it was just a different level of comfort that Robbie could feel and appreciate. Maybe it was these that had given him the confidence to say what he said?

As he sat contemplating exactly just what he’d said, he wondered where it had come from. It sounded, even to him, rehearsed but as far as he knew it had just flowed, like his pee, all very naturally. That ‘smug’ feeling returned and Robbie was left alone to enjoy the rest of the sunny afternoon lounging by the pool and appreciating the sights and sounds of loads of kids taking full advantage of the hotel’s facilities. He smoothed the prominent bulge down and liked the way the sun shining on his polyester camo shorts reflected a sort of sheen, which he thought made them look even ‘cooler’.

~

Twenty minutes later Karl came and joined him looking very relaxed and smart wearing jeans and a Mainz football jersey as he and his dad had just been to a German bar to watch a game there. They sat for a while, once again Robbie with his knees up so his friend could sit on the end of the lounger but obviously didn’t care if he saw his bulging nappy or not.

The smugness, this feeling of being in control of the situation was quite new. He’d wondered what his reaction to being found out would be like and it had surprised him just how unconcerned he’d been when it happened. It could have been down to the fact that his parents had normalised him wearing a nappy so much, that was what it was... normal. He hadn’t been scared, in fact he was proud of himself for not feeling embarrassed and dealing with it the way he had but now wondered, should Karl say something, a person he liked and respected, would he react the same way?

The thing was, Karl knew that Robbie wore padding, not because his sister had told him but simply from previously seeing the bulge in his swimming trunks. Nevertheless, he knew that it was no concern of his why a person wore windeln (nappies), it could be for medical, or other social reasons and was none of his concern, so he just hadn’t mentioned it. He’d been brought up to respect other people’s differences by parents who had concern for people’s feelings and privacy. However, at that moment Karl could see a smiling face of some cartoon animal, covered in clear plastic, grinning at him down his friend’s shorts. It made him chuckle to himself but thought he wouldn’t embarrass Robbie by making a comment. It was up to Robbie to decide if he wanted to say anything or not. However, it probably explained why he didn’t go in the pool as often as others.

Whatever the reason Karl liked his English buddy. There was no Blödsinn like there was with some other kids on holiday. He wasn’t constantly trying to prove himself or be better than he was and although he didn’t know him before, Robbie came across as a very nice guy. There was something ‘naïve’ about him. Karl wasn’t sure if his assessment was correct or that was the exact term, but in some ways he didn’t appear to be a twelve year old (the age he said he was) in his dress sense or attitude. It was like he’d found an age where he was happy and settled into that.

Robbie hadn’t told him about his past association with his school gang so all that side was never on show. Karl had quite liked the fact that he’d mixed with Darren and had no trouble with the age difference and he’d seen him dancing with six and seven year old girls in the disco without looking in the least self-conscious. Karl had noticed his padding even then... though maybe his friend was unaware of that fact. In spite of this, his little brother Leo wore similar windeln and he looked really cute in them and, if he was honest, so did Robbie.

~

When Robbie returned to the top floor his mother was back having bought a few extra items and souvenirs to take back for friends. He found his parents on the balcony enjoying a chat and sharing a bottle of chilled Vinho Verde. He grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and joined them.

He noticed that whatever they were talking about was private because he could hear the change in conversation topic, they didn’t hide it particularly well. What they’d been talking about was the homeschooling idea and whether they should let Robbie in on their plans. The initial idea was to see if he’d go with the notion or if he’d create and insist on going back to his school, something his mother at least was dead against. They were stuck as to whether to just jump in and tell him what was going to happen or just gently try and ease him into the situation as they wanted it to happen.

Armed with his new found confidence Robbie launched straight into his thoughts.

“What’s the big secret?”

Thomas and Claire looked at one and other and seemed to come to the same conclusion – it was time to tell him their plan.

“Well love,” she patted the seat next to her and Robbie settled down to hear what his future was going to be. “As you know, we’ve been talking with the Carpenters and they have taken it upon themselves to homeschool Darren because they weren’t happy with the school in their area.”

Robbie nodded and suddenly realised what was coming next. “Erm, does this have anything to do with my return to class next term?”

“Yes.” His dad looked serious but his mother was all smiles. She went on, “Because of, well, last terms problems we’ve decided that it might be in your best interests to have a break from the influences that aren’t good for you.”

Even in the warmth of the still sunlit balcony for some reason a chill ran through Robbie’s body. He was going to say something but dad jumped in.

“Since the summer break and being kept away from those terrible lads, you’ve behaved and there has been a positive change in your personality... something your mum and I want you to keep.”

Robbie wriggled a little uncomfortably in his nappy and a slight whoosh from his plastic pants escaped. It was as if it was signifying that it was his nappies that had made his attitude and behaviour change. However, he kept quiet and let his parents explain everything.

~

At the back of his mind he was thinking that he was going to be homeschooled with Darren by his mum and that would have made him equal to an eight year-old. There was a rising panic as he thought his mum and dad wanted to keep him as a little kid and stop him becoming a teenager. He found his voice.

“Does that mean I’ll be homeschooled with Darren?” He asked disconcerted.

“Oh sweetheart, no,” his mum saw how the idea had depressed him, “I’ll be doing the homeschooling... it will be at our house and your dad and I think it would work a treat if we can get everything organised before the new term begins. However, the bottom line is, we have no intention of sending you back to that school if those kids are going to be there. We will not go through all that again and we think neither should you.”

“But, erm, but, ummm...” There were seeds of a protest growing in Robbie’s mind but he was having trouble actually formulating any objection.

Both his mum and dad took turns in explaining what they’d planned and when Robbie realised that it probably wasn’t such a bad idea to keep him away from Mally and the gang, he began to think in a more positive light. He was totting things up himself and therefore missed quite a bit of what was being said. However, he came back to listening as his mother smiled but it had a ‘this is how it’s going to be’ vibe about it.

“... you’ve made so much progress love that we don’t want to see you slip back into those erroneous ways.”

Robbie couldn’t help it but a tear ran down his cheek.

“Don’t cry sweetheart,” his mum comforted, “it’ll be alright. Amanda has given me loads of advice and apparently, it couldn’t be easier to arrange... but you will have to cultivate some different friends, which hopefully we can do by seeing if there are others in our area who want to do the same with their kids.”

The thing was, the tear wasn’t because of what he would lose, it was because his parents had given him a way out of having to see the gang again. His guilt about what he’d done wasn’t going to go away but he was sure that Mally and the rest of the gang’s influence would, despite any commitments to his family, be tested over and over again. He knew that a complete break is what he needed although being homeschooled wasn’t something he’d thought about. However, now it was on offer, perhaps it was an ideal time to...

His thoughts were interrupted by his mum telling him a few more things that were going to happen.

“Don’t think this would mean you could lie in bed all day, there would still be a learning regime and a dress code so you were aware that this was not an excuse to do nothing. Mrs Carpenter was very specific about keeping to a schedule and making sure it was adhered to by all concerned.”

Robbie was unsure but it looked like his parents had decided and doubted if he could change their minds, even if he wanted to. He wasn’t sure he did, although the fact that he wouldn’t be able to be part of a football team was a minus for homeschooling. Having said that, he thought how little he’d actually played since being in the gang and how the gang had become everything. It had driven him to act stupid and...

Oh yes... that guilty secret... would he ever pluck up the courage to tell them or, as he’d more or less decided, take it to his grave?

The more they talked and enthused the more he wondered if this was an opportunity, like wearing a nappy, to better himself. Should he embrace the entire concept and buckle down and accept that his parents, as had been proven, know what’s best for him? Also, would nappies be staying because, if he did return to school and still had to wear them, he’d rather be at home.

He asked the question, “Erm, would I still have to wear a nappy?” He was inadvertently tenderly rubbing the bulge in his shorts as he said this.

“Yes of course sweetheart, the nappy has proved to work and, as we’ve said already, we don’t want to see you slip back into your bad ways. Also, and I’m sorry to repeat what we said at the very beginning... we know what you’ve done and we also know there’s more than you’ve confessed to so, until that area is all cleared up... your nappy,” she smiled cheekily, “which has never looked better on you, will stay. OK?”

She was chipper and upbeat and offering him a chance to tell all and perhaps get out of having to wear a nappy but he stayed silent.

Robbie wasn’t sure whether to be annoyed or pleased. He’d gotten used to his nappies and plastic pants (even though he thought such a thing would never happen) and he quite liked the way things were with his mum and dad. In fact, if he was honest, things had never been better and they could enjoy each other’s company in ways he thought would no longer happen. Such was the change the last few weeks had delivered.

His full nappy was visible down his pants leg to his mum who smiled and said perhaps it was time for a quick change but Robbie said he’d wait until they were going out to dinner.

“I think there’s room for a bit more absorption.” Was a sentence he never would have expected to have uttered and yet, he was very comfortable in its expanded and cosy form. There was a hug to his groin which made each one of those thicker childish disposables very, very dependable.

~ tbc ~

Part 14

Robbie’s parents knew there was a lot for their son to take in. They hadn’t really planned on telling him their scheme until it was confirmed about his father’s promotion, which they hoped would be settled before they returned home.

So much had changed for Robbie and his parents had hoped that the holiday would solidify the family relationship, which, to all intents and purposes, that’s exactly what it had done. In fact, as Claire looked back on her notes for the article she hoped to eventually publish, she couldn’t have been happier about the way using such simple things as nappies had reined in their son to such an extent. Not only that, but he totally accepted that until he confessed his real crime (although neither Claire nor Thomas had any idea as to the seriousness of it), or they acknowledged his new attitude was permanent, the padding stayed.

After the criticism her initial tentative online article had caused she had taken the opportunity to reflect on all that had been said. Of course it was still ongoing but she was buoyed by her son’s reaction to all that she and hubby had done. Over the past couple of days she’d been able to see that other people’s comments and suggestions were not needed and had quite happily decided - positive or negative - not to take any notice of them. This had immediately put her in a better frame of mind and was keen to see Robbie flourish under her care; the future homeschooling being a very important part of that. Changing her boy’s nappies had also become a very intrinsic part of that care because she knew that bond she had with him as a baby, was amazingly just as strong with him being a teen. Now, after each change they hugged and there was genuine comfort from Robbie as he held the embrace for quite some time. He seemed to enjoy snuggling with mum or dad whilst they patted his padding and didn’t complain about either the disposable or plastic pants into which he’d inevitably just been fitted.

~

For a month now Robbie had been overwhelmed by his parent’s actions and it had taken to this holiday to really appreciate the freedom (maybe of a weird variety) that had got him to where he was now. Total relief: time with his family, the lack of having to prove himself, the sheer delight in waking up and looking forward to the day, even if he was wet and messy – not all these things had been at the forefront of his mind previous to the day dad had said, “It’s nappies for you from now on”.

For the time being, the holiday at a lovely location, in a wonderful hotel and with some nice new friends, had proved to Claire that everything she and Thomas had considered had worked out better than either could have hoped for; the entire enterprise had been (and still was) very satisfying.

Every day they could see the improvement; Robbie was having innocent and childish fun. In the mixed environment of the international hotel he was getting along with everyone and seemed keen to be involved. It had taken him almost a week to get fully into the swing but now accepted whatever was on offer. He’d made some friends and was often seen chatting to groups of kids of all ages. Darren was nearly always tailing him and thankfully Robbie included him in whatever he was doing. In all the fun, all the games, all the beach visits or pool activities, Robbie’s nappies were always there and he never complained. He was only avoided by the two boys Owen and his mate Steve who had seen his nappy and tried to embarrass him. It appeared that after what he said had resonated with the lads and they thought by even being in his vicinity, somehow, they would be made to wear a nappy. That, like Robbie, was to be dodged at all costs.

What was more interesting was that Robbie offered no kickback to the idea of being homeschooled. They had thought he might protest not seeing his school mates again, or feel the change was just too much but as his last report was not good something needed to be done. Claire wondered if Robbie himself knew that changes needed to be made and had seen this as a way of doing so whilst not having any say in how it would be made effective. She was correct, that was just how Robbie had eventually taken his parent’s plan; like the nappies, he had no choice.

Claire had told him, once home, that they would search the local area to see if there were other parents also wanting to homeschool and if so, perhaps, like Amanda and Darren, form a new little group that would be self-supportive. She was optimistic this would be the case.

Robbie was in a place he never expected to be. The restrictions were actually liberties, the nappies were not a punishment but a comfort, whilst the clothes he wore were a release from being someone he wasn’t. Meanwhile, his parent’s love was unconditional and that had become the key to his happiness. Maybe he wouldn’t have used those terms but that’s what his life had now become.

~

The rest of the holiday passed off without any hitch at all. A second go on jet skis had been equally as exciting as the first time and at one point, Darren and Robbie had been up parasailing together. This ‘trip into the skies’ had seen Darren crying in distress and desperate to get down but Robbie had enthused so much and talked him through his fear that by the time they returned to the boat he was desperate to go again. However, it was not a cheap trip so his parents said that once was enough for anyone.

One morning towards the end of the second week there was a huge sandcastle building competition organised by the Atlantico on the beach in front of the hotel. It was split into age groups - Under 6s, Under 12s and Under 16s - of course anyone could build their own sandcastle but unless they’d registered you couldn’t win a prize. The prize wasn’t that much really, just a gift voucher to spend on anything you liked from the hotel’s gift shop to the value of whatever you won but that was hardly the reason not to take part.

There was a huge turn out and the toddlers section seemed well organised by their parents who came equipped with more than just buckets and spades – they had moulds and flags and all manner of accessories to add to their creations.

Robbie joined Darren and three of his mates in the Under 12 category and didn’t seem bothered in the least. Once this would have been an absolute no-no, mixing with kids younger than himself but, odd as it might seem, Robbie had decided to just throw himself into the silliness and unrestricted fun of being daft - no pretentions, no worries but definitely more enjoyment. It appeared that his parent’s liberating him from having to make any decisions had also liberated his sense of childish fun so relished the general madness and excitement that surrounded him.

This was something else this holiday had thrown up, and perhaps it was what holidays were all about, although there were times he felt and wanted to be seen as an adult (as when talking to Anna or the lovely receptionist) he’d been encouraged to simply let himself go. Whatever boundaries there were didn’t include not having as much fun as possible. The wristband may have said where he could go and what he was entitled to but the rest, well, when he was having that much joy he wasn’t thinking about anything else and that was wonderful and liberating.

As they crawled and shuffled around on the beach pushing up mounds of sand his nappy gently hugged him and he felt valued. Even plunging into the sea and scooping up water in a bucket to bring back to help shape their developing structure didn’t deter him as the material under his neoprene shorts expanded, he didn’t care. A couple of times when the material appeared above his waist or down a leg hole and got noticed, he nodded to whoever mentioned it and simply shoved it back under cover - not troubled in the least.

His little group didn’t win but they had created quite a huge construction, though what it was no one knew.

~

The day before they were due to return home Thomas took an early morning call from his office. He was out on the balcony whilst Claire was cleaning up her son from his full morning nappy and getting him ready for the day. Thomas came off the balcony beaming as his wife had just got Robbie laid out and ready for his pre-nappy cream and powder.

“It’s all done sweetheart,” he said hugging Claire tightly before tousling his son’s hair. “I’m to be a partner and in charge of, well, everything... manage all our production and future projects.” To see a strong, tall man in his early forties literally jumping up and down with excitement was weird but even a naked Robbie joined in the family hug. It was a terrific moment and Thomas knew they would have to celebrate.

However, Robbie was scheduled at the Under 12s disco ‘supervising’ Darren again, so any celebration would be left until the evening when they’d all go out for a special meal. Actually, what that meant was that whilst Robbie was down in the club for a couple of hours, Claire and Thomas would be able to find their own way of celebrating, which, with an acknowledging nod, they both seemed to think about at the same time.

Robbie didn’t catch the ‘look’ but knew that his parents would have a lot to talk about now the news had been confirmed and didn’t want to be around for all that boring stuff so was glad he had other arrangements. Despite the embarrassment of the earlier trip to the Under 12s disco, for some reason he was really looking forward to having a dance. He’d been embraced as a friend by all of Darren’s young pals who badgered him to join them in the club until he agreed. It was nice to feel wanted.

Meanwhile, after the initial excitement about the announcement had died down a little, a still naked Robbie needed to get ready for his outing. Dad went into the bedroom to lose a few of the clothes he was wearing, whilst Robbie was quickly well nappied, plastic panted and dressed in his favourite camouflage shorts and top. He felt really great and couldn’t wait to meet up with the guys down in the club. His mother couldn’t wait to wave him off.

~

In the lift down, he read for the umpteenth time that children under ten were not allowed to ride the lift unaccompanied by an adult (someone over 18). On two occasions, when on his own, he’d been looked at suspiciously by a member of staff joining the lift on a lower floor and telling him he wasn’t supposed to travel by himself. No matter how much he protested, they still took him to reception to get his age confirmed. Apparently his wristband didn’t give his age just where he was allowed to go and what was available to drink or eat. It had bothered and embarrassed him on the first occasion but wasn’t too bothered now because the number of times he’d ridden the lift on his own without any comment far outweighed the times when it had.

OK, he had to admit that since mum now had total say in the way he dressed he looked younger than he was. Despite the constant nappy she didn’t baby him (although there were times when she fell into ‘baby-speak’ when he was being changed) but he’d come to terms with his ‘newish’ look and simply took it in his stride. There was nothing to be gained from creating a scene or feeling resentful because, as he’d come to realise, the way his life was now... things had never felt better.

As the lift descended, on the fifth floor, Karl, Anna, Leo and their mum and dad all joined him on the decent. Undoubtedly, Karl’s family were all very good-looking and even when dressed casually like now, appeared quite elegant. Karl was wearing very tight fitting denim jeans and a blue polo shirt. Like the rest of the family, his blond hair looked as if he’d just come from a hair stylist. Not only that but he looked much more grown up, like a cool sixteen year old. There was no doubt that Robbie felt very much the junior partner in their friendship and was glad that there was no reference to the way his perpetual boyish shorts slightly billowed out. Anna wore matching pale blue shorts and top, whilst little Leo was wearing shiny nylon pull-up blue shorts with Minions on the side and a Minion’s t-shirt, if he was wearing a nappy then it wasn’t obvious. Of course, mum and dad were equally smart and glowed with parental pride. They were all off for a family day out so Anna wouldn’t be helping out at the disco. The group all seemed happy to see him as there were smiles and ‘Hellos’ all around, but Robbie was a bit sad, even after his last experience, when Anna said she wouldn’t be at the dance.

As it was, he needn’t have worried because Felice, Gertrude and Albertina were on duty and each teenage girl was very pretty and very attentive to the young ones. Robbie felt his rising passion on several occasions and it was only the thickness of his disposable and plastic pants that stopped him from embarrassing himself. At one point Albertina came over and joined in the dancing with his group of eight year olds and grabbed his hand to twirl him around. He nearly blacked out from the thrill of it. By the end of the disco his nappy was a complete soggy mess.

~

That evening, as they were getting ready to go out for the celebratory meal, mum had got Robbie’s best clothes out and fitted him with one of the distinct colourful disposables and thick clear plastic pants. She pulled over his light blue cotton onesie and fastened it between his legs.

“That should keep everything in place love.” She smiled before pulling up his nicely pressed blue linen shorts. Once his pale blue, button-down collar shirt was buttoned up and hung down over his shorts, no one would notice if his padding expanded slightly. They were all dressed smartly with Robbie comparing them to Karl’s family, which as they headed along the seafront to a restaurant that reception had recommended, a comparison he thought they passed.

After ordering their meals, and drinks had been served, they chatted about the new future the promotion would enable them to pursue. Of course mum was keen to get the homeschooling thing off the ground and now with Robbie’s support that didn’t seem in the least bit daunting. Well, at least she hoped not. Up until then she’d had her own part-time job to help with the family finances but now she could concentrate all her efforts on keeping Robbie away from that school. The extra money dad would be bringing home also promised more holidays abroad and a general lessening of the financial restrictions that they’d previously had to adhere to.

There was a new sofa Claire was keen to buy and of course the redecorating of the house was a top priority. That would mean that Robbie’s room would soon get a make-over from that of a pre-teen to one of a teenager, or so he hoped.

“Will I get to choose the design?” He asked hopefully.

“Of course sweetheart,” his mother promised but had a definite idea of what his new room should look like.

They even discussed returning to The Atlantico at some later date as they were having such a good time.

“The thing is sweetheart, had we been in the villa you thought we were going to, you wouldn’t have had half the fun or opportunities you’ve had. Easy access to the beach, loads of new friends, and you’ve never looked so content.” His mother regarded him proudly; his tan making him look even more healthy now the guilt-ridden dark circles under his eyes had disappeared.

The food arrived, and as promised, it was superb.

By the end, all three members of the Davison family sat fully satiated, and whilst mum and dad finished the second bottle of wine, Robbie went off down onto the beach to watch more games that never seemed to end as the marked off sandy ‘sports area’ teamed with noise and life.

Mum watched as he confidently waddled away. She knew the padding wasn’t exactly dry but like so often now it didn’t worry him. Once again she was pleased with the way her boy was constantly improving.

There he met some of the friends he’d made and enjoyed the half-naked youthful volleyball guys and girls jumping up and down, hitting the ball and sweating profusely. There were many exciting sights to see (and comment on) and found himself attracted to the lean and agile captain of one of the teams. He shouted his instructions to the team in Spanish and encouraged each player with high-fives after each point scored. All the team members wore matching red and yellow nylon Speedos and he in particular filled out his very noticeably. Robbie wasn’t the only one transfixed as a group of young (and not so young) girls were hooting with delight whenever he touched or stretched for the ball. Robbie was quite entranced until mum and dad found him and they began to saunter home. For the second time that day, his nappy was just a tangled damp mess.

~

Two days later, and with a series of farewells to Karl, the Carpenters and some other friends Robbie had met, and with promises of keeping in touch having exchanged email addresses, the Davison’s were on their way home. The two weeks holiday had been a huge success in cementing the family bond and the sponge-like nappy and thick colourful plastic pants his mum had put him in for the return trip was more of a comfort than a bother. He didn’t know it at the time but his cute thick disposables would be kept for ‘special’ occasions and it would be back to fleecy terry cotton nappies once they were home. However, for the moment he didn’t need to know that as he was happily ensconced in his thick but juvenile Portuguese undies.

At Faro airport there were long lines at passport control. So it was just as well that he wore the compact but highly absorbent nappy because standing in a slow moving and lengthy queue it came in quite useful.

It was a glorious, cloudless flight back and Robbie, once again taking the window seat, watched the wonderful Portuguese coastline pass below. He was thinking about what his first email to Karl would be about and was pleased that mum had taken several photographs of them both together so thought he’d send copies. There was one in particular where Karl had his arm around Robbie’s shoulder and he was wearing his skimpy blue Speedos... that was his favourite. If he got his phone or tablet back that would definitely be the screensaver.

As he thought of that he closed his eyes and drifted off, his damp nappy receiving more contributions that meant it expanded quite considerably and his childish plastic pants could be seen down the leg of his shorts. It didn’t bother him because he fell asleep and only woke up as they were approaching their home airport and had to fasten seatbelts getting ready to land. He looked down at his visible bloated underwear and smiled, he mentally thanked his mum for putting him in something that saved any embarrassment because he knew how full yet again it had become.

~

As they drove back from the airport Robbie was reflecting on just what had happened over the last two weeks... in fact, the last month or so.

Change was happening all the time - things he thought would never happen; happened. Things he thought he’d never get used to; he’d got used to. He’d changed; he wasn’t sure it was for the better but everyone else thought it was, so maybe? There had been an assault on his mind, a not very subtle assault, that made him realise he had to somehow make amends. He’d tried to pretend that he didn’t need to, because, as a growing lad he was allowed to make a few mistakes, a few misjudgements and that was all part of him becoming who he was. Except, he hadn’t included his parents in those calculations, nor had he seen that his mother especially, had her own ideas. She’d cleverly (and some might say forcefully) fed her opinions and beliefs into his head by not allowing him to disagree, thus making sure only her propositions were the ones that mattered and acted upon. His own feelings of guilt, dread and the overwhelming belief that he would eventually be punished had made sure she succeeded... and in record time.

However, despite the thick, damp and uncomfortable nappy he now wore as they returned home, he still had a few internal worries and wondered if they’d ever pass. This wasn’t helped as he gazed along the streets he knew so well and the church they’d driven by on the way to the airport previously had on their roadside noticeboard - TEA AND A LISTENING EAR. However, now, as they passed on the return journey it had the word - REPENT in large letters and all your sins will be absolved by God.

Unfortunately, the feeling of guilt that had to a certain extent lessened, came crashing back into his head and began to wonder if that would ever change. As they waited for the traffic lights to change the sign on the church gave a handy clue and supplied the relevant quote from the Bible to make understanding a bit easier.

Proverbs 28:13: "Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy".

He wasn’t sure it applied to his parents but maybe it was worth a go... or not!

The truth, and the reason for all this business in the first place was, that secret he’d been holding back was just too awful to ever confess or forget. Perhaps, spiritually he could Repent without involving his parents but would that work? Should he go to church and confess even if he wasn’t a Catholic? How did that work? He wasn’t sure but one thing he was convinced of, and had been since this entire nappy thing started, if either mum or dad got to know about that stupid but indefensible act, then everything would change and nothing would be the same again. Although it was a heavy burden to carry he knew he had to. He’d carried it for months before this punishment started, he’d continue to carry it no matter the consequences. He doubted that any of the ‘gang’ would speak about it, there involvement, although not as significant as his own, meant their silence was all but guaranteed.

That was another thing, from now on he wouldn’t be seeing anyone from school again if he was being homeschooled, so seeing the gang wouldn’t be a constant reminder. Not for the first time, and he doubted it would be the last, a strong cold shiver ran down his back as the memory he’d tried so hard to forget launched itself to the forefront of his mind.

Whilst passing along familiar streets and with the hoped for reassuring surroundings of his home town he pondered just what action to take. Over the past month, since having to wear a nappy, he’d been made aware of quite a few things. He’d found out more about himself but also the unconditional love his parents gave that he’d so easily and recklessly cast aside. It may be weird because he didn’t think he ever would, but he’d grown to appreciate things as they were now.

If he kept his secret, his parents would keep loving him absolutely and if that meant no let-up in his guilt, then perhaps it was the price he had to pay for his culpability.

~

Mum had more-or-less decided that he could keep his secrets but as a result the padding would stay. Over this past few weeks she’d grown to relish changing him so much she positively beamed in delight with each soggy or messy nappy. The care and attention, the pampering and total undiluted affection and of course love she gave would be hard to fault, and, although there had been something demeaning about it to begin with, her little boy now thought it wasn’t that bad.

Robbie was in a very bizarre situation because, while he was just weeks away from actually becoming a teenager, his mother was treating more and more like a child. Not that she was babying him, no, she simply was more motherly, more attentive and more certain that her son should maintain an innocence. On several occasions he’d heard being called ‘her sweet, innocent son’ something she seemed quite proud of and, if truth be told, he needed that virtue back. She knew there was something in his past that was bad but tried to maintain this rejuvenation, this aspect of innocence, as a positive.

He knew, because of what he’d done, that was never going to happen but whilst mum and dad thought of him in such a way, some guilt-free feelings had returned and that was all down to the way she’d been indulging him - mainly the infantile security and attentiveness wearing a nappy somehow naturally produced.

At his age he wasn’t into psychological debate but there was no doubt, that when it came to wearing nappies, mum had made them more than a little acceptable to his past underwear. They often did make him feel like a little kid but on holiday that had been a bonus – there was no guilt in the enjoyment of building sandcastles.

At the beginning he thought it a stupid punishment which made him appear like a little kid. The fact that they insisted he use the damn padding was another blow to his teenage development, which he resented. Whilst the accompanying fact he wasn’t given any option made him quickly have to endure his situation. So, despite totally rejecting their ridiculous concept, in fairly quick time he’d slipped into it... and with remarkable with ease.

As had been proved – if people knew they knew, so, apart from a bit of ribbing by a few kids, his confidence had grown and as a result, cared less and less about his infantile underwear. That had been a huge hurdle he never thought he’d overcome. When asked he simply told folk he was being punished for his actions, which oddly most people took as a ‘good thing’. His mother made sure he didn’t lie and was actually quite proud of his admission on that at least.

For what he’d done, all this, was something he deserved, or so Robbie had assumed. Now he seemed at ease in his part as to why he had to wear thick protection and that was what his parents had hoped for. They were a constant reminder to be good, to be aware and to understand he was loved. Other parents wanted to know more about her thinking and if such treatment was in fact a remedy to bad behaviour. She would simply smile, nod in the direction of her well-behaved little boy and say it was going far better than anticipated. She generously hoped when her article on the subject was published it would be of help to other parents trying to cope with similar youthful troubles.

However, that idea of a life-affirming article had taken a few knocks. Some of the criticism had been terrible and although, in general, it was positive, she did see that unless she kept it anonymous it could cause Robbie problems. The idea of adding photos was dropped and a total rethink was in order.

If Robbie could see things from inside his mother’s head he would be in no doubt that she saw and regarded him as a lovely and loving little boy who had needed a nice thick nappy to remind him of his place, thus, once home, the quick return to fabric. She’d seen this as a way of dragging him away from the negative aspects of a future irresponsible and reckless young life but it had turned into something more... much more. Claire had been more determined and forceful in getting her son back and the results had surprised both of them.

The speed at which this turnabout had happened had simply encouraged her desire for him to feel as happy about the situation as she was. Despite at first not being aware of it, she pursued her ideal with a fervour bordering on obsession. Nonstop praise, continuous normalising of wearing a nappy, hugs, cuddles, relieving him of all responsibilities had been key. However, when she looked at her son now, that worried air of not so long ago had been transformed to one of joy, whether the bulky outline of his padding was showing or not. It was yet more evidence as to just how much more positively things had changed and she was determined that the progress that had been made during the holiday would continue.

~

Claire had started writing her ‘proper’ account of what had and was still happening. She checked on the visible proof of her recorded video clips and photographs on just how much her ‘sweet boy’ had developed. Through those images she could see him getting more compliant and at ease with the restrictions she was imposing, an acceptance of the situation. She was remaking her boy and as far as she was concerned - for the better. However, those images would be kept private and the article, if eventually published, would not refer to him by name.

Robbie had acquiesced (like he had on all his mother’s decisions) to the plans she’d decided - a new school (of sorts) to attend after the summer break – no Mally (or gang) to think about or impress, a new start. He’d eventually understood what a fantastic opportunity was being suggested and had come to realise just how grateful he should be for it. Being treated as a kid wasn’t that bad so he could at least pretend everything was back as it was when he was younger, after all, he looked the part.

The short temper, the rudeness, the disparaging way he’d treated everyone over the past few months Robbie knew that really wasn’t like him. How he’d been turned into such a person so quickly, although a mystery, he didn’t question - except, it was quite an exciting time. Since being put back into nappies, and his parents had made him think about his actions. He now realised the cost was quite high but hadn’t thought just how quickly his return to the way things were had been.

His thoughts and worries had taken him to different scenarios he found, as a twelve-year-old, difficult to contend with. What had seemed a great idea and a lark when with Mally and the guys, was truly just a nasty and often pointless attack on someone or something. He’d been led into situations that he could have walked away from but instead had decided to join in. It had taken his mum and dad’s refusal to accept that situation and unbelievably, making him wear a nappy had been that turning point.

The dreaded threat - THWACK! - that possibility of a strap being viciously applied to his bare bottom had all but disappeared. He knew his parents wouldn’t be tempted to do such a thing whilst he was wearing a nappy... they weren’t cruel.

The other thing he was coming round to realising was that not everyone who’d screwed up like he’d done, were given a second chance. He doubted if Mally, and indeed any of the gang, would be offered such an opportunity. Of course, when he reasoned it out he didn’t want to lose his teenage status, and he hoped, given time, he would regain it but, and indeed it was a huge but, mum in particular had made it clear that there were many hurdles he’d have to clear first.

Once again he knew there should be some resentment but, maybe he did deserve this as a punishment, except, now he was used to it, oddly it didn’t feel that much of a punishment.

However, there was that secret, that bloody awful, unforgiveable secret. Would he eventually tell and let his parents in on that disastrous mistake? There had been moments when he almost caved and was desperate to confess just what exactly it was that he’d done. He knew that his conscience was a burden for him to carry. However, despite the fear of the dreaded THWACK! all but disappearing, the thought that the police might get involved was too scary to contemplate. There was no denying that what he’d done was that bad but why, after what mum and dad had gone through to get him to where they were at now, why would he spoil it all? It would be too painful for all concerned and one from which there would be no coming back, so why confess to it?

This same argument had been going on in his head for some time and he always came back with the same answer. He knew what he’d done. That indefensible act of mindless madness had to be hidden for ever. He also knew and had always known from the very beginning of this nappy business, that he needed to be punished for not only that despicable act of stupidity (there were many others) but also for his unbearable treatment of those he was supposed to love. Would being made to wear a nappy for the rest of his life be worse than being locked away? He doubted it and given the choice he’d chose the former.

Robbie was caught in his own mental anguish. He was home so wouldn’t have the distractions he had whilst on holiday but also wasn’t convinced that confessing his sin would relieve him of any guilt. Of course, if he did confess there was a good chance his family would stand by him, but again, that wasn’t certain. If it did come out and there was a court case, he wasn’t sure how he could defend himself and not involve the rest of the gang. He was relying on their silence so would hardly break the pact that - what happened in the gang stayed in the gang.

Could he be loyal to both them and his parents?

No, no, no, soon he’d be a teenager so it was up to him to grow up and take responsibility. However, not having any responsibilities and leaving every decision down to his parents had curiously been quite a relief. So, if that meant wearing a nappy and acting the little kid for his mother... well... there were much worse options.

One thing he was certain of, mummy loved her little boy wearing a nappy and, for the time being, he desperately needed to hold onto that affection more than anything; it was what kept him from being dragged under by the weight of his guilty conscience. Could he balance the two? Not only that but his ‘best buddy’ relationship with dad had returned, and nothing was more important than that. So, on balance - wearing a nappy was the price of that undeniable and enriching love.

Therefore, possibly doing as his parents directed wasn’t such a bad idea. Maybe wearing thick padding and plastic pants might keep him focused. Besides, he’d gotten used to the security the whole nappy thing offered.

He contentedly ran his hand over the thick, sleek outline that had become part of his daily (and nightly) underwear. He was in a rally good place and, despite all the earlier misgivings, really wanted to keep what he now had.

After all, wasn’t the entire concept in his best interest?

~

The day after they got back his parents returned his mobile but continued with restricted hours on his games console. Unfortunately, after clearing out all the old messages one of the most recent text he had was from Mally - DUNT ADMIT TO OWT.

An unexpected shiver ran down his spine. That intuitive signal that doesn't bode well but he didn’t know what he shouldn’t admit to. There was a link to a piece of video that was trending (and had been for the last couple of days according to the date the text was sent) of THAT incident, with a young boy, in school uniform, the centre of the action. He had no idea anyone was around to film it but there it was... so why had it taken months to surface?

The immediate shock and anxiety turned into something more bowel loosening. Horrifyingly, it was as if, all at once, every tap was turned on and the sluice gate opened as Robbie quickly and unceremoniously filled his lush, reassuringly thick, terry nappy with liquid effluent. It felt like his very lifeforce had drained from his body and deposited itself in his soggy and extremely messy padding. The heavy weight he thought had been eased aside returned with sickening vengeance.

Tears of fear, panic and dread sprang into his eyes and a cry of “Muuummmy” died on his lips as if he’d been punched in the gut.

He'd thought his new life was sorted... not anymore.

~~~~ The End ~~~~

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